The Word I Know
Chapter 2

Of Banana Bags and Resignations

"Good evening, Eren!"

In strolled Doctor Sawyer Havoc with a big smile on her face, her long red hair pulled into a high ponytail with all sorts of fray split ends that framed her face like she'd made some kind of effort to look presentable.

She was chipper, which wasn't surprising, hugging Eren's medical binder to her chest, the look on her face not even remotely reflecting the overwhelming exhaustion from pulling a twelve-hour shift. The soles of her feet ached, her skin was dry, and although it wasn't the longest shift she ever pulled, it was surely the most tiring one. It'd been one long week, filled with hundreds of patients from the Survey Corps who'd just returned from their perilous journey outside the walls.

The only thing that kept her going was the fact that it was Saturday and Saturday nights meant the end of her painfully stressful workweek. Saturday meant spending her night at the local bar with her favorite bottle of tequila. The bar was only a five-minute walk away from the barracks. It gave a whole new meaning to thank god it's the weekend and stress relief because it hardly concerned Sawyer that she'd most likely be drinking on her own. Most doctors went home and went straight to bed.

"Hey doc," Eren replied, feigning a small smile in return for good faith.

"Mikasa," Sawyer shifted her gaze to the raven-haired beauty sitting by Eren's bedside, hair in disarray, "we could accommodate and get you an extra hospital bed in here for you if you want. I'm sure sitting in that chair all night isn't very comfortable."

Mikasa's cheeks tinged the faintest shade of pink and she averted her gaze to the floor, "That won't be necessary, Doctor Havoc."

"Well, I'll leave the offer on the table in case you decide to change your mind," the redhead said, scribbling a note down on Eren's medical chart to remind herself later about the extra bed; she shot him a warm smile, "anyway, how are you feeling today?"

"I'm…fine," he lifted his arm and flexed his bandaged bicep, forcing a cartoony little smile to reassure her, "so are you going to discharge me any time soon, doc?"

"We'll probably have to monitor you for another couple of days," replied Sawyer, placing the binder down in the socket attached to the frame of Eren's bed, near his feet, "your recovery time is really incredible. I mean, you came in all bruised up and now you barely have a scratch on yourself. It's really something."

The redhead grinned, "Almost suspiciously fast, considering the fact that we all thought you were going to die. Your lungs were crushed, you had all these internal wounds, and you had a spiked up fever that nearly hit 105," and she removed the stethoscope that hung around her neck, approaching him at his bedside, "but that's neither here nor there."

A fleeting look of panic formed on Eren's face that eventually melted into a funny looking cartoon smile, "Ah—you know, I'm just a fast healer. I've been taking my vitamins and all the stuff you guys have been prescribing me. Yeah! Just following orders and stuff."

Mikasa looked more sternly at him but didn't say anything.

He was rambling and all of it could have been highly suspicious but Sawyer decided to give him the benefit of the doubt for the time being, not without raising her eyebrow a little in response. She pressed the turnable diaphragm against the back of Eren's back, "Alright Eren," she said, "breathe in deep for me."

"Ahem."

Eren, Mikasa and Sawyer all looked up in unison at the doorway to find a very familiar looking broodingly indifferent captain with his arms folded over his chest. Sawyer only spared him a quick glance, wrinkling her eyebrows in irritation while she shifted the turnable diaphragm down lower on Eren's back. Although she pegged Levi as somebody who looked relatively nonchalant to what other people thought of him, she never expected him to be the kind of person who would walk in on her job for the sake of intruding. Maybe she expected too much from him. After all, if he didn't have a penchant for small talk, then how could she expect the most basic common courtesy from him?

Without saying too much, she removed her stethoscope and hung it over her neck again, picking up Eren's medical chart from the socket attached to the foot at the frame of his bed. She scribbled down quickly a few notes about his heart rate and without even looking up from the binder, she asked, "What brings you here again, Levi?"

"I need a word with you," he said.

Sawyer continued scribbling, and when there was no reply—only silence—Sawyer finally looked up from the binder with a blank look on her face. She looked at Levi, and then looked back at Eren and Mikasa, who were both staring at her with these expectant looks on their faces.

The redhead doctor pointed to herself, cocked her head to the side and without the intention, she asked dumbly, "Who—you need a word with me?"

A mild stress mark formed on the side of Levi's head and he motioned to the hallway with a curt nod of his head. Sawyer decided to go along with the little awkward charade, so she followed him and closed Eren's medical chart, wedging it in between her armpit as she followed the brooding captain into the empty corridor.

"He needs to be discharged," Levi didn't even hesitate, "tonight."

"Okay. Well. Good evening to you too, grump," Sawyer resisted the urge to roll her eyes at him, "but I don't think that's a decision for you to make."

"That's why I'm talking to you," he told her, "aren't you a doctor?"

"Point made," she said, shrugging, "sorry. Can't help you there. I'd be discharging him against medical advice. Take it up with the attending—doctor Suedaïyah."

"Aren't you his doctor?" Levi narrowed his gaze.

"He's higher up on the corporate hierarchy than I am," said Sawyer, "he'd kill me if I went out of my way to discharge a patient he wanted in the hospital for the next couple of days."

"I'd make sure that didn't happen," was Levi's stern reply.

"It's a figure of speech," she said, "anyway. I'm sorry but I won't be able to help you."

He resisted the urge to groan inwardly at the idiot doctor standing in front of him who was apparently trying to take the high road. It seemed he knew she was going to say something like this. So he swallowed his patience and decided to go on a different route, "This isn't a request, Sawyer. This is a command."

"Your jurisdiction ends outside this hospital," she replied, smile fading from her mouth, "sorry to say. Eren was probably in the worst shape of his life when he arrived here. He's healing at an abnormally quick rate, and Doctor Suedaïyah took interest in him. He wants to monitor for a few more days."

"He isn't a lab project for you people," Levi stated, "he's fine. He needs to be discharged."

"Why the hell are you so adamant then?" She snapped, "If he's fine, then let him stay a few extra days to recover. Isn't Eren a new recruit, anyway? Why is a new recruit so valuable—"

"—it's not because he's valuable," he replied, distaste dripping off that final word, "try to mind the words you choose—"

"—mind my words? Well, aren't you a sweet talker," she snapped, "then what is it a question of? Please enlighten me. Why does he matter so much to you—"

"—he's not safe here," said Levi darkly, barely able to contain himself.

"This is a hospital," Sawyer wrinkled her eyebrows, "if you're looking for safe, this is really as safe as it gets in the city—"

"—he isn't safe to others," was Levi's final, frustrated, hardly contained reply.

Silence sifted through the air and Levi could feel the hairs on the back of his neck rise. Maybe they turned down the heat because suddenly, it felt a little colder and the more he stared at the redhead doctor standing in front of him, the more he could feel his stomach turn.

He could chalk it up to his recent lack of sleep from the night before. Sawyer Havoc didn't look particularly angry but Levi could feel something sinister radiating from her. He isn't safe to others, he had said. It wasn't the truth, but it wasn't a complete lie. The pieces of the puzzle weren't completely clear but something seemed to click inside her that became apparent.

"He isn't just a freshman recruit is he?" Sawyer asked, "Isn't safe to others. Strange regenerative healing abilities. Kind of like a titan…"

She paused and bit her lower lip, "Wait, no. Exactly like a titan. Wait—was he the titan that blocked the hole in the wall? I mean—that's crazy, right? Just stop me any time I go too far. Isn't that…just the craziest thing you ever heard…"

Sawyer trailed off slowly and stared at Levi with a blank look in her eyes.

It was like clockwork. Like a hundred piece puzzle that were too easy to put together. He should've expected this much from someone who decided to become a doctor. But if he didn't say something now, then her attending doctor would take Eren in like a science experiment. Suedaïyah wasn't someone they could trust. Not at the moment, anyway. As much as he didn't want to admit it, Sawyer was the only person he could trust right now in this hospital.

Silence filled the air.

Then more.

And more.

Then.

Sawyer lifted the binder from under her arm and slammed it as hard as he could against the side of Levi's head.

"Why the hell wouldn't you tell me that when you checked him into the hospital, bakayaro!"

The sheer shock of the hit stunned Levi almost instantaneously.

It might not have even been the hit, but the fact that he was hit by a girl—a doctor—and that irony could not escape his mind. His eyes were still recovering from the dark spots that resonated in the corners of his vision and he blinked rapidly in succession, staring at the chart still raised in the air like she was ready to strike again. It was amazing, that despite her coming to the conclusion that Eren was a titan, she was more focused on the fact that Levi hadn't told her about it. All of it could've been highly suspect but Levi surmised that it was probably her duty as a doctor that came first before judgment or anything else. Some petty heroic bullshit like that.

Before he could say anything to even attempt to reassure her, Sawyer stormed off in a huff.

It suddenly dawned on him that she wasn't only angry with him for withholding information. She was angry because he didn't trust her well enough to tell her in the first place. And yet, he was asking her to trust him. Still, it must've been an ego issue. How could she have expected him to tell her? When did he even have the time to tell her? How would this have been a casual conversation?

Yesterday when she saw you in the barracks, his inner mind told him but he slapped this thought away.

His thoughts didn't reach too far because Sawyer came back, red-faced, shoveling a bunch of papers in his arms all in disarray, "Have him sign these papers and give it to the nurse at the desk and leave. It's to acknowledge that you're leaving against medical advice," she stared at him, hair slightly tousled from her quick run down the hallway, "take the back entrance out and make sure that he isn't seen by Suedaïyah."

Levi didn't know what to say, so he took the papers from her hands, "You're actually helping."

"I don't need you to state the obvious," she told him, "just go. If I think about it, I might change my freaking mind."

The shot of golden liquid burned down her throat and Sawyer stuck a wedge of lime into her mouth to ease to slow burn, feeling the intertwining tastes of bitter and sour seep through her taste buds. "Fuuuuu—" she uttered, unable to finish the –ck at the end of her sentence. She removed the lime from between her lips and placed it on the bare table.

"That's pretty unsanitary," said Aidan, the bartender, motioning to the shreds of lime sitting on the table.

Sawyer shot him a small smile, "I've been in a hospital for the past twelve hours. Please don't lecture me on what's sanitary and what's unsanitary."

It'd only taken four shots for Sawyer to feel time slow down.

Being on an empty stomach didn't particularly help and she never thought the day would come where she would be calling herself a four-shot wonder. She'd always said anything under six shots to get someone drunk meant they were a light weight. It was already three in the morning but there was no such thing as starting too late—at least not in her world.

"Whoa, slow down there," Aidan told her, "I might have to cut you off soon."

"For what I'm paying, I think I'll take my chances," Sawyer shot him a small smile, "so I'll have another shot of tequila, if you don't mind."

Aidan smiled a kind of crooked smile and looked at the line of face-down empty shot glasses sitting in front of the petite redhead like she'd accomplished some kind of personal triumph or something, "This is your last one. I'm serious, Havoc. I'm going to have to ask you to stop after this."

"It's not like I'm being a nuisance to society—especially when society's already asleep," she sighed, taking her fifth shot with a brave face. She was already drunk so it wouldn't change much, although she was sure in five minutes, she'd be feeling that shot, "try to go easy on me today, Aidan."

"Long day—huh," he leaned against the edge of the bar, using a small white towel attached to his waist band to wipe away the excess droplets of tequila that'd accidentally hit the counter, "anyway—we're closing soon. Need me to get you a carriage to take you back home?"

"Nope. I live in the barracks," said Sawyer, "it's only a block away so I'll be okay—"

"Doctor Havoc," in walked Martin, a nurse from the hospital she worked at with a face full of sweat like he'd just run the marathon—eyes wide like he'd seen something truly awful, "Doctor Suedaïyah needs you back at the hospital. He says it's urgent."

The redhead narrowed her eyes and pushed herself up from her seat, head feeling only slightly dizzy, "I'm fine," but her words came our slurred and empty and she looked like she was already halfway to losing her wits, "did he say what it was about?"

Martin shrugged, "He didn't."

"I'm going to have to advise against that," said Aidan, "she's in no shape to be practicing medicine tonight. She should be sent home."

"Uh-uh. Barracks," said Sawyer, "my home is in the North."

"Well aren't you charming," Aidan stated with a small smile.

"I try my best," she told him; and without warning, she pushed past Martin and stumbled out of the bar and fell straight on her face.

Doctor Suedaïyah was in the middle of the surgery so Sawyer took the time to banana bag herself. Suedaïyah was around twenty years older she was, with a balding head of gray hair like he'd seen better days. He was a good doctor, a good surgeon, and he was one of the last doctors in the hospital who'd been train from the ground up. He was beyond the time of quick medicine and there was no responsibility quite like the responsibility that he carried on his own two shoulders.

The banana bag was quite simply a transparent, banana-colored bag chock full of electrolytes and vitamins. It was usually applied to patients who were dehydrated and high off uncontrolled substances that circulated seasonally throughout the city. It was a simple way to rehydrate patients quickly and drive out the excess drugs from their systems; it was also an effective way to get rid of the drunken stupor people had especially after drinking. Not that she ever thought she'd be in this position. Being drunk in a hospital. She'd always prided herself on keeping work and play separate.

She prodded herself with a needle but couldn't get a good touch on her veins. How she finally managed to get the IV in her arm was beyond her but here she was, standing in the middle of the corridor, pacing back and forth with a banana bag hanging from a metal stand she was rolling around. Wherever Sawyer went, the banana bag followed hanging over her head like a yellow omen. She wasn't a particularly tall girl so whenever she halted, the banana bag would hit her over the back of the head. But in her drunken stupor, it was difficult for her to digest the fact that if she took a couple of steps to the side, she'd avoid being pounded on the whole night.

"I need to talk to you."

She stopped abruptly, the banana bag slamming against the back of her head while she turned around, pulling her metal stand next to her, staring at a very familiar looking captain. Each word he said was slow; at least, to Sawyer, who felt the time pass by at an abnormally stalled rate.

"Now," he told her sternly.

"Meet my banana bag," she told him, eyes glazed—she motioned to the transparent yellow bag looming over her head, "his name is Paul."

He stared at her.

"Are you…drunk?" Levi asked, arching a brow in only mild curiosity.

"Um, yeah. Duh. What else is new—" She told him, "—wait. Why are you here? Didn't I help you discharge that titan out already?"

A tick mark of irritation formed on Levi's mouth and he grabbed her roughly by her free arm that wasn't holding the banana bag and pulled her into a nearby broom closet soundlessly. Her metal stand barely followed in time before he slammed the door closed behind her. The banana bag hit Sawyer in the back of the head and she had a look of slow, burning irritation like it'd taken her an extra second to process the fact that she was getting needlessly pounded on by Paul.

"It would be wise to learn to keep your big mouth shut," he told her coldly.

She rubbed the back of her head where she'd been hit by the banana bag, "Jeez…are you always this rough on people?"

She was a petite girl—tiny. Smaller than Levi was, which was probably saying something. Maybe he'd grabbed her a little roughly, but the thought didn't concern him for too long. Sawyer was probably too numbed from the alcohol she'd ingested earlier on to actually process any kind of pain below her neck properly.

"Oh shit," she said, "shiiiiiiit. I get it now."

"What are you talking about," Levi snapped, "spit it out."

Sawyer pointed at him, jabbing him sharply in the shoulder, "This is—like—an ego thing, right? You like being on top. People bend over backwards all the time for you—doing what they can, right? Catering to your expectations and orders…and stuff. Paul thinks you're full of it."

Levi narrowed his gaze, "Paul."

She motioned to her banana bag, "Yes. Paul," she repeated, followed by a pause, "he thinks it'll screw you over someday. Your ego, he means."

Levi looked like he was thinking something over carefully. His eyes darkened and he closed his eyes.

"It already did," he stated, finally, "once before."

Some silence filled the air. Sawyer's eyes softened considerably and somewhere deep inside her, she might've convinced herself she was beginning to sober up from all the alcohol, "Really?" Her voice cracked slightly, "What happened?"

He looked like he was mulling this over, looking at her like he was processing whether or not she was a good candidate. He was thinking about something but it hardly read on his face so he said, "It isn't worth discussing."

"But…I want to know," it wasn't something Sawyer would ever admit aloud if she were sober.

"That doesn't matter. There's something else I need to tell you," he interjected.

"Um…and…what exactly would that be?" She asked him.

"You're going to resign today," he told her.

Deep within herself, she was floundering. But her mental processing of this statement didn't match up with the dumb look on her face; so she snorted and rolled her eyes, "Yeah? And what're you going to do? Force me to resign? Forge my signature on my resignation papers?"

"I already did," he stated, "now you have to confirm in person with Suedaïyah."

He watched her, and she stared back at him blankly. Then, she did the most unexpected thing.

She smiled.

Levi sort of wrinkled his brows, going over their conversation quickly over his head. Had he said something misguiding? Was Sawyer genuinely happy to get out of the hospital?

Next thing he knew, he was on the floor, with Sawyer straddling his waist while he was getting savagely beat over the head by her banana bag, Paul.

Her smile had thrown him completely off—and although he'd prepped himself earlier to defend himself from her (which should've been easy—after all, combat was his expertise), he was still finding himself getting beat by her—by her stupid banana bag.

"Why the hell would you do that, bakayaro!" She screeched, "Now I have to explain to my boss that those weren't my papers—seriously! What the hell were you thinking—"

Levi grabbed her roughly, a wrist in each hand. His hands wrapped completely around.

In her frantic attempt to beat the crap out of him, Sawyer ripped out the IV needle from her arm and a small stream of blood flowed down the side of her arm. A single teardrop fell down from her face and fell right onto Levi's right cheek. He looked at her from below without even flinching. He was calm…collected.

"I need you to trust me," he said.

Sudden stillness came over Sawyer and she looked at him, tears falling from her face onto his.

note—

Diange - thank you so much! I actually haven't read a lot of Levi/OC stories so I'm glad to catch your attention :)
Sweet-sour-bipolar - Ohoho. Sawyer is, indeed, filled with bombshells! And thank you so much, I really, really tried to make the dialogue work while keeping Levi in character, which was actually really hard to do…harder than I expected lol thank you for the love! So much love for you :)

reviews = love = faster updates. Thanks for the love in the opening chapter!