Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem: Awakening.

• {Chapter two} •

In a small town southward of Ylisse, in the month of Iulius, at the present time:

Dear Lissa,

I must say that your previous letter shocked me. At first I could not fathom why my refusal to take a walk with a man should anger you so. But, after some days and much thought, I believe I have realized your reason: You wish me to move on.

Lissa, you and your sister are so kind and compassionate to pray for my happiness, to worry and sweat for my own sake. I thank you for this. But you can not understand how I feel. Yes, life must go on, I know this - and I think I have done quiet well coping with reality. But you can not ask me to move on, not yet. I am not ready. And no, I have no idea of when I shall be, or even if I shall ever be.

So please, be anxious no more for my sake. I am content to live life grieving.

In the nation of the Feroxi, in the month of Iulius, one year ago:

Robin's eyes were closed. She didn't need sight to see where she was. Every time the carriage hit a bump, every pause as it turned down another fork, every stop to water the horses - she knew them all by heart. The journey to Regina Ferox was long, but unvarying; a bored queen could memorize the route after only a few trips.

So Robin lounged, mind indolent, in the carriage; she was surrounded by warm, expensive pillows, to keep her weak body from shivering or falling gracelessly to the floor. A blue blanket also covered her, one so heavy she wondered if her thin arms could even adjust its position.

But she had no cause for alarm. Every few minutes, Frederick would swing down from his seat beside the driver and into the carriage. If her eyes were closed, he would silently arrange her pillows and blanket for a few moments, satisfied only when they were snug in the original position, feel her cool forehead, and then leave. However, if Robin appeared wakeful, then Frederick would continue with his duties while badgering her with every question befitting his station of pretend lady's-maid.

So Robin kept her eyes closed. Soon, the carriage door opened again, and Frederick swung inside, shaking the compartment. It sounded as though he hesitated for a moment at the door, before putting a familiar weight on Robin's shoulder. "Robin, forgive me, but we have arrived."

Robin's eyes opened instantly. She could not help but grab Frederick and hug him as tightly as she could, though her weakness left her rather dangling in his arms. "Thank you," she said, her voice soft but solid. "I have missed you, Frederick. I don't need a servant or a caretaker or a protector. I need you, Frederick - the man I fought beside, bleed beside; the man who... knew Chrom since he was a boy, and loved him longer than I was allowed."

Robin had no strength to look up and see his reaction; falling into his arms had left her too weak to move. She began to slip towards the floor, and immediately was lifted more firmly into Frederick's grasp. He carried her and the incredibly heavy blanket out of the carriage and into the snow.

The wind struck Robin's cheeks; it seeped through the blanket and poked her body with its frozen fingertips. Soldiers surrounded the walls of Flavia's fortress, some Ylissean, most allies, but all were foreign to Robin. As she took in the glances of pity and curiosity, Robin's heart pined for the familiar warmth of a Shepherd.

"Robin," Frederick spoke conspiringly, "have you gained weight?"

Robin's eyes widened. She opened her mouth to protest, then paused. She giggled, and laughed, and might have screamed had she any energy. But she was crying.

"Frederick, I love you." she whispered hoarsely.

"And I you, Milady."

Inside, strange faces continued to greet Robin and her party. One soldier welcomed her, then instructed her to travel on; another soldier explained that Flavia was not available, but someone else would show them to their rooms; a third soldier met them and took them to the bedchambers, explaining further that Lon'qu, too, was far too busy to be disturbed. When they reached Robin's guest room, a maid delivered a letter from said man.

Good day, Robin. I am sure you are anxious to meet, but I would rather you rest, first. Our conversation will most likely prove tiring to you. - Lon'qu

"Do you think... he is afraid to see me?" Robin asked Frederick, after the soldiers and maid had left. Frederick had finally deposited Robin in her bed, and was now fidgeting with her luggage and the furniture in the room.

He turned and straighted when Robin spoke. "Lon'qu is afraid of all women equally, Robin," he said, "with the singular exception of his wife. No, he certainly is not especially afraid of you."

Robin nodded. "Thank you. Will you stay with me while I wait for his arrival?"

"Unnecessary."

Robin turned, slightly startled, to the opening door. Lon'qu stood at the handle, tall and strong, in clothes much finer than seemed natural to him. He entered the room, nodding a greeting to both her and Frederick, before taking a seat at the end of Robin's bed. Upon closer inspection, Robin thought how pale his face appeared.

"Hello, Lon'qu," she said, her voice weaker than she would have liked. "I apologize for... well, this." She gestured with a short laugh to the her bedsheets.

Lon'qu shook his head. "We have sat at each other's bedside countless times. Common formalities and customs have long since been damned."

"How very true." Robin smiled. "I have missed you. It has been very long since we last saw each other."

"Three years."

"Yes, when you came to Lucina's birthday. When I had heard we had been invited to Feroxi to see you - that is, your army pitted against that of Flavia, I was excited. How strange... That was less than two months ago, yet it feels as if so much time has passed." Robin hid a cough in her hand. "I'm sorry. I sound as though my head is drugged, but it's not. I'm fine, and I want to talk."

Robin met Lon'qu eyes; his were as steely as ever, impassable, mysterious. She felt a blush realizing her own must appear so vulnerable in comparison.

Lon'qu began with a sigh. "I do not pray often, but I did thank the gods when I heard that you were not a member of that disastrous party." He paused and swallowed, his mouth set in a slight grimace. "I received a message from Chrom three weeks ago, sent ahead of his party by a soldier. In short, it informed me that his party consisted of just ten people - himself, seven measly soldiers, a valet, and the young page who delivered the letter. He told me you were not well enough to travel, but that they had made great time and were to arrive in another day. Flavia handled all the preparations necessary for welcoming someone of his class; I thought it was ridiculous to spend any special time or money on a childish king who would never on his own notice any such gestures." Lon'qu closed his eyes. "So I stayed out of the way and waited. I waited for three days."

Robin clasped her hands together.

"Finally, his carriage rolled in. Two of its wheels were split, which explained the delay. It was being supported on all side by horses, so I didn't immediately notice the missing door and the hacked wood around the hole. And when the horses were removed, my eyes instead went to the bloodied figure lying on the carriage floor."

Lon'qu's voice became quieter. Robin's fingers tightened.

"A soldier told me they were ambushed by some thieves just an hour after the messenger was sent. Some band of miscreants, petty, ugly thugs - but there were thirty of them and just eight fighting men. Just eight men... What in all the gods's names was he thinking?" Lon'qu screamed. He slammed his fist against the mattress, making a dull thud. Robin said nothing.

After a moment, Lon'qu continued in his monotonous voice, "They attacked the carriage with such vehemence, they must have suspected some great wealth inside. They badly injured one young soldier trying to gain access; the party thought the man was dead. The soldier who told me this said Chrom became suddenly enraged. He flung himself at the thieves, shouting that he would defend his men. Sometime during this panic, Chrom was stabbed through the stomach."

Robin's eyes widened. She swallowed slowly.

"Our physician couldn't say exactly how many times he was stabbed, or by what. It could have two or three times, but when the soldiers brought him here, he still had a thick dagger protruding from his abdomen. But the hole... it was larger than that dagger."

Robin nodded. "You don't need to say anymore." she whimpered. "What happened after that?"

"I sent you a letter immediately. I sent it to you, figuring that my informing anyone else would just incite dark rumors and chaos. I didn't even consider that your condition might have been just as serious as his."

"It wasn't just as serious." Robin said. "Because I am alive while Chrom is dead."

Lon'qu said nothing. There was quiet for a long time, the only noise being an occasional sniffle from Robin.

"Continue, if you please, Lon'qu." asked Frederick. Robin had almost forgotten he was there.

Lon'qu nodded. "I apologize. We waited to hear from you, and did what we could for Chrom. The physicians stitched his wound and cared for it as best they could. He regained consciousness the next day, but didn't seem - himself. He babbled, babbled endlessly for hours over strange things he supposedly had seen on the journey - flying shadows, and biped animals stalking the mountaintops. Then he would suddenly stop, shut his mouth and not speak again for days, as though he were depressed. Two weeks later, after being silent for four days, he burst out screaming and crying. He flailed around and made such horrible, gutteral noises, saying something that I just couldn't understand, until he broke the stitches and bleed to death."

"Stop." Robin said, but not quickly enough to stop Lon'qu's final remarks. "Stop." She covered her mouth, shaking her head. "I can't... hear anymore."

"Robin," Lon'qu said, "there is nothing more to tell."

"... No. There is one thing. There is more." Robin looked up, no longer feeling embarrassed to show to him her red, weak eyes. "First, how long has it been since Chrom died?"

"In two days, a fortnight."

Robin wrapped her arms tightly about her chest, her fingers digging into her soldiers to keep herself in one piece. "A fortnight." she repeated breathlessly. "My husband - dead - a fortnight. And I never knew it." She felt as thought she had been slapped. She silently and constantly repeated that single word, 'fortnight.'

"Robin," Frederick spoke severely, "this conversation is taxing what little strength you have recovered. You must rest now, what remains can wait."

"Wait, one more question!" Robin grabbed Lon'qu's hand. "Where is he now?"

Lon'qu met her gaze. "In the guest room two doors from here, where he was when he died. The body has been prepared for burial, but-"

"Two doors." Robin repeated. "Let me see him. I must see him. Take me to see him!"

"Robin," Frederick jumped to his feet, "you are exciting yourself too much! You shall grow ill again!"

"So what!" Robin screamed, glowering at Frederick. "So what if I should grow sick! Perhaps this time I truly will die! Why should I not die? Would it not be better? Neater? If I die, then I may be with Chrom again!" Robin arched forward, slamming her fists slowly, then more rapidly again the matress. "I shall die! I shall die! Gods, let me die!"

Frederick and Lon'qu grabbed her arms, but she fought them for control. Still, Robin screamed, "Let me go! Let me die! Let me die! Let me die!" The last chant fell into a sob, her head falling with it. She lay, spent, against Lon'qu's chest, crying softly.

"Let me die. Please, let me die? I don't want... to live... without him..."

Speaking of grieving, I wondered whether you had plans to visit Ylisstol in the near future? You see, it has been some time since I last was home, and there are many things I could do in even two days. If you would allow me to ride with you, then I shall not have to worry about sharing a public carriage with strangers; you nor your husband need worry about escorting me. No, once I am home, I shall be quite well on my own.

Author's Note: I tried very hard to keep the charaters's grief realistic and not let my being a female interfere with the solid natures of Lon'qu, Frederick, and Robin. But in case you suspect Robin's melt-down at the end was out of character, remember that she is still extremely weak from illness; perhaps she would have been better able to control her grief had she been at even half her strength, but she is actually persevering on very little energy.

On another note, I have an interesting tidbit of knowledge that you may very well find entertaining: My sister, Pokémon67 is writing a parody version of this story, entitled The Flow of Timeless. (How clever she is at titles!) The first chapter has been posted, in case you want to check it out. Please do review her story, if not mine. (But why not be a really great person and review them both?)