Eek! Sorry this took so long, but Christmas and New Years and school. Ugh. XD Exams too. Too many freaking exams. And I am really sorry this is slightly shorter than usual. This chapter was hard to write.
Twilight belongs to SM. Plot/title/Bella's power etc etc belong to gaara king of the sand. Also, question: Can anyone spot the Bastille lyric? I hope I got it right. XD It's a lyric from Pompei, which I do not own.
Since he told me about Jasper, I haven't spoken to Tom, but I have been watching the Cullens. And from what I've observed, I'm not sure Tom is entirely right. Well, about some things. Jasper being in the Southern Wars makes sense. But about the killing... And about Carlisle being too trusting. I don't think Carlisle would buy it if Jasper was to kill me and stage it as an accident, especially if Jasper had already expressed an interest in killing me.
About a week ago, Carlisle came into the school and did a talk in some of the Juniour and Senior classes about what it takes to become a doctor. Edward watched him carefully throughout the whole thing, even though he could ask his father about anything he missed at home. I got the feeling that Carlisle has great control over his children, but not in such a way where he treats them badly. Just in the way where they respect him so much that they willingly follow him, and would do the end of the Earth.
Edward keeps trying to talk to me, but whenever it's out of the one class we share, Rosalie is always there to drag him away. Whether it's outside or in the middle of the corridor, she is always there. It's quite unnerving.
Apart from that, I haven't had much interaction with them, but I've found that whenever Edward walks away or is dragged away, I find a deep longing for him to stay. It worries, and scares me, and I'm tempted to look into his future to see if that holds an answer, but his future last time terrified me, and I'm worried I'm going to see that last seen again.
Those cloaks and the fire still haunt my dreams.
Admittedly, I have a lot of questions for Tom. Jasper seems to be in pain when he's close to humans, but relaxes a bit while around his family, and I can only guess that it's because he's struggling not to kill anyone. I want to ask Tom about Carlisle, and how could he possibly be doctor if it's so hard for vampires to be around blood.
Every morning, when I leave the house to go to school, I cringe as I see my truck. I do like it, I do, but I started it once to move it slightly in the drive so it would like I've been driving it and I almost flew out the window the engine was so loud. I think I'll just keep walking to school, even if it is further than I'd like to walk every morning.
But when I woke up this morning, I really did contemplate either driving today or just calling in sick. For when I woke up it was because the sun, of all things, was glaring through my window, reflecting offof every shiny surface and trying to blind me at every turn. And when I was dressed and had my bag packed and opened the front door, I found that it was also slightly warm. Rosalie Hale's brown leather gloves immediately became too tight and hot and I heave a sigh. Crap. It seems to day is going to be a day of future seeing. But I'm gonna be an optimist about this.
"Bella!" Jessica squeals when she spots me walking into the lot (I did walk, in the end. Completely glove free). I notice she's wearing shorts and a vest. It's warm, I know, but not quite warm. To be fair I'm wearing jeans and a t-shirt with a light jacket in my bag, where as I'd usually be wearing a coat and leather gloves and at least two layers on my top half (probably a shirt over a t-shirt). "How was your weekend?"
"It was good, thank you," I tell her, even though I literally did nothing. Nothing at all. Well, except reading and staying in bed and homework, but I'm sure everyone else's weekends were a lot more exciting. "How was yours?"
"It was boring," She says without hesitating, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "The rain stopped us from going to the beach, so we all ended up just staying at home. We didn't even meet up at Angela's house like we used to because she took her brother's to Port Angeles."
"Well, we'll ask her about that later," I say softly. "Let's get to class. Perhaps we can go to the beach after school? It is warm today." She beams at me, and I know I have plans.
At lunch the plan is proposed to the rest of the group, and the eagerly agree. So when school is out, I find myself packed into Tyler's van with everybody else, heading towards La Push. It's a little bit colder at the beach than I expected it would be, though, so I put on my jacket, shoving my hands in my pockets. Once Tyler has spread out a picnic blanket he found in back of his van we all sit down facing each other talking over each other in groups or pairs. Soon after, a group of boys come over to our small gathering, and I recognise one of them as Jacob Black. I give him a quick hug, thanking the Lord that he isn't wearing a vest like two of the other boys, who, like Jess, are in shorts and a vest. It's warm, but it's not that warm.
Most of the guys go off to play football (In my mind this is soccer... I think. Again, UK stuff. XD Someone might have to help me with this.) but Jacob sits next to me. As he does, his hand brushes a patch of skin just above my wrist, and I freeze as his future blinds me.
He's an average teenager. Decent grades. A prank here and there. An army of friends. Gets on with everyone. We see each other occasionally, and then his whole future shifts. He's with other boys, wearing a vest and cut-offs, even in the snow. He is constantly surrounded by huge dogs, wolves, maybe, and like Edward's future, the forest is going passed at blinding speeds. I am there again, and I think the Cullens are too, but it's too blurry to make out. Something is changing his future; it is still being decided.
I freeze completely, my breath catching as I stare straight ahead. Angela notices after a second. "Bella?" She asks softly, and I look up. She's saying something else, but the words aren't registering. "Bella?" She asks again, and I stand up suddenly.
"Actually," I say, shaking my head slightly in an attempt to clear it. "I'm not feeling to good. I think I'll et home now. It was nice seeing you, Jacob."
"Do you want me to drive you?" Angela asks, concern etched over her face. "I can ask Tyler for his keys."
"No, no," I smile slightly to let her know I'm okay. "The fresh air will do be good. I'll see you at school tomorrow." She nods, but the concern hasn't disappered. I know she will be watching me until I am out of sight, so I resist the urge to run. I just need a minute to clear my head.
However, once I know I am defnitely out of sight from them I begin running. I haven't been to this part of town in a very very long time, but somehow my feet know where to go and I find myself in my room in no time, even though I know I've been running for at least twenty minutes. The moment my bedroom door is shut, I throw myself onto my bed and stare at my hands. They don't look different, but something has changed.
My gift has always been limited to my palms. Jacob touched my wrist. No, not just my wrist, above my wrist.
Is my power growing?
And his future... What is it with boys in this town and the forest? I know now that with Edward's future the forest was shown like that because he is a vampire, who can probably run much faster than I was seeing. However, Jacob is clearly not a vampire. So is he destined to be one? And if he is, why didn't I see it?
What's happening to me?
Now that, is a question I don't want the answer to... Well, in some respects. Today, obviously the Cullens weren't in school because of the sun... And I found that I sort of missed them. Well, maybe not all of them, as I haven't spoken directly to Emmett, at least, but I found that I missed Edward most. I missed his interest in my life, and I think some of the other students missed to spectacle of Edward being dragged by the arm or the ear by his sister down the halls to the exit. I missed his calm demeanour, and I found that I sort of craved his presence, and I don't need Tom to tell me that there is something especially wrong with me if I am craving a vampire's presence.
But it's more than that. Without him there, without him sitting next to me in biology and walking me next to my class (or attempting to before Rosalie gets to him) I didn't feel quite as... as... safe. It took me quite a while to admit that to myself when I identified I felt different today, that I felt safer when he was there. I hated identifying that. I hated the thought that I only safe with him there... Well, no, that's not quite right. It's not that I don't feel safe at all, without him there... I just don't feel as safe.
I hope.
Again, I find myself staring at my hands. They look the same. They are the same. But I have always hated them for the power they hold. Now, that power is moving, and I don't know how far it has moved, or how far it will. I'm pretty sure that my hands still hold this power, but my arms now hold it too. If my gift is evolving like this, how long will it be before I completely hate myself; before I completely hate my entire being?
Considering how quickly it spread from my palms (I'm almost certain the curse was still contained to them when I moved to Forks), in a matter of months I may be decking myself out of polo-necks, boots and balaclavas. But if I do that, I will be even more of a freak. I might as well face my own future, and try to ignore any others I may see. I should try to focus on the present, and try not to worry about someone else's future, as it is none of my business. It's never my business.
"Bella?" Charlie calls my name from downstairs just after I hear the front door open and close. "Are you home!"
"I'm upstairs!" I call back, not moving from my position on the bed. I hope he heard. But then I know he hasn't, as I hear him coming up the stairs and my door opens suddenly. I sit up so he can see I'm okay. "Sorry," I tell him. "I did answer."
He just shakes his head and smiles his smile. It warms my heart slightly. It never occured to me how much I missed my dad. "That's okay," He replies. "I'll order pizza or whatever you want tonight if you like, and we could watch a movie... Unless you have plans?"
"No," I grin, as spending some time with my dad actually sounds really nice at the moment. Up until now I feel as though I've been more of a room mate to him than a daughter, or even a relative, and it occurs to me that because of my angry refusal to come to this town in the summer, we hardly know each other, not really. "That would be really nice, thank you. I'll be downstairs in about an hour. Just got to get some homework done."
He nods, smiles again, and leaves the room, gently shutting the door behind him. However, instead of doing homework, I, once again, stare at my hands. It's times like this I wish I could see my own future; then I'd be able to test how far the power has spread... Well, maybe that's what I need to do. I need to test it.
But who would I test it on?