CHAPTER 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The drive back to Alex's was quiet. Alex's mind was racing. Why did Piper keep the necklace for all of those years even after she left her when her mom died? Is she and Larry really over? Does she even know what she wants? Is she just spending time with her because she saved her life? Alex was afraid to let the blonde back in because she knew she wouldn't be able to take Piper leaving her again once she came to her senses.
Piper was quiet because she knew that Alex was unsure of her. She didn't blame her. She did leave her when her mom died and broke her heart. Piper was determined to prove to Alex that she wants to be with Alex and will fight for her.
Piper Chapman was on a mission to prove to Alex that she wasn't going anywhere.
"Alex! Take a shower and I'm going to change the bandages." the blonde commanded.
"I can change them myself."
"No, you can't! We've been through this for three weeks now. You can't reach the one on your back so you might as well let me change the two of them! Quit being a difficult jerkface."
Alex rolled her eyes and got a towel thrown at her face as a result.
"Alright, I'm out of the shower! Come dress my wounds, Nurse Piper!" Alex teased.
Piper headed into Alex's massive bathroom and stopped in her tracks when she saw Alex sitting on the edge of the counter with her back to her and her wet hair sticking to her bare back. Piper felt her arousal shoot straight to her core. Gathering the supplies, Piper stood behind Alex. She gently moved Alex's hair to one side and put disinfectant on the wound near the salt shaker tattoo. Alex hissed in pain.
"Sorry" Piper said proceeding to blow at the wound to help ease the pain. Goosebumps appeared on porcelain skin and Alex's eyes fluttered closed at feeling Piper's warm breath on her bare skin. With feather light touches, Piper placed ointment and a bandage over the bullet's exit.
"All done. Just turn a little so I can do the front."
"Wait." Alex said while reaching for her towel that had fallen to the ground to cover her breasts.
"Is the great Alex Vause suddenly shy now?"
Alex narrowed her eyes at Piper's teasing and let the towel drop to the floor once more. Blue eyes instantly dilated and Piper could feel her own arousal spreading throughout her body. Piper stepped in between Alex's legs while her shaky hands picked up the supplies.
"Nervous are we? Never seen a better set of boobs?" Alex teased.
"Shut your mouth. Do you want me to put extra disinfectant on this wound so you can cry in pain again?"
Alex quirked an eyebrow up at the blonde. She missed her temper.
Piper began the process of changing the bandage and when it came time for the disinfectant, Alex braced herself for the pain but it was quickly alleviated by Piper's light steady blows of warmth despite her threat. Piper finished dressing the wound and seeing how close the bullet was to Alex's heart reminded her that she almost lost Alex permanently and it caused Piper to become overwhelmed with emotion and tears instantly formed in her eyes. Without thinking, the blonde placed a gentle kiss over Alex's heart. Alex's breath caught in her throat and her hand found the younger woman's chin tilting her face up. Emerald eyes scanned watery aqua ones before focusing on the marks on the younger woman's face. She gently ran her thumb across the bruises on each of the blonde's cheeks before kissing each one with such gentleness that the blonde felt as though her heart was truly melting. Alex could not help her green orbs from glistening with moisture or mask the anguish from her voice, "I don't know what I would have done if something happened to you. When I saw the state of your store and didn't see you, I was so worried... When I heard your cries and ran into the backroom and saw that asshole on you, attempting to- " Alex closed her eyes unable to even finish, "I have never been so terrified in my entire life." Alex, the ex-drug importer that encountered some of the world's most dangerous drug bosses and found herself in harm's way too often to count, was most terrified when the blonde was in danger.
Alex closed the distance and wrapped her arms around the crying blonde. They held onto each other for dear life, comforted by the feeling of each other's heartbeat. Piper buried her face into the taller woman's neck, breathing in her unique scent. After her tears died down, Piper lifted her head up and gazed into emerald eyes. She slowly inched closer closing the distance. Her nose was touching the brunette's and her lips were moving in to close the small gap between their lips, but the moment was interrupted when continuous ringing and knocking from the door caused the two ex-lovers to break apart.
Piper begrudging went to the front door. She was met with the ill-timing Nicky Nichols letting herself into the house once she opened the door. "Hey blondie, where's Sasquatch?" Before even receiving an answer, Nicky barged into Alex's room. "Yo, I came to keep you company! I can help nurse you back to health, you helpless giant! And blondie can go home since I will be here."
"Hey blondie! You can go home now. You are relieved of your duties until further notice."
Piper did not want to leave especially after what just almost happened. With hopeful eyes, she looked at Alex, but what came out of Alex's mouth hurt and disappointed her. "Yeah, Piper you should go home since Nicky is here now. I will be fine without you. Take care of yourself." Alex knew that her dismissal hurt the blonde but she knew that if Nicky hadn't interrupted, they would have kissed and things would've gotten out of hand and in the end, Piper would go back to Larry anyway. Alex figured with some distance, Piper would be able to think more clearly and Alex would save herself from more heartache.
Piper disappointedly gathered her bag and said her goodbyes to the best friends.
Piper opened the door to her apartment that she hadn't spent a night in for months. She set her stuff down and couldn't shake the feeling off- she felt out of place and it didn't feel like home. Piper looked around the apartment that she had shared with Larry until they day after she got attacked. Larry had moved out when she told him that the engagement was off.
Piper wanted a new place. One that she hadn't shared with her ex-fiancé. Looking around the apartment, she felt like it was not her anymore. She picked up the phone and asked the real estate agent that found PoPi's location to put her current apartment up for sale and to find her a new residence. To kill some time, Piper started packing up her apartment. However, keeping busy still didn't keep her mind off of Alex. Is she ok? Is Nicky going to take her to her appointment on time? What is she going to feed her? Picking up her cell phone, she texted Nicky. "Remember Alex needs proper nutrition and she has an appointment at 3pm today."
"Don't worry, beer and nuts are a great combo and I'm going to drive as fast as I can when I take her to her appointment."
"Nicky! You better be kidding!"
"Calm your small titties, blondie... I'm only partially kidding..."
Nicky was laughing hysterically.
"What's so funny?"
"Just messing with your blondie girlfriend."
"She's not my girlfriend and be nice, she's been really great taking care of me."
"She must be really good at licking your pussy to have you all defensive over her."
Alex hurled a pillow at her best friend's head.
"What?! I'm just speaking the truth. You've had your panties twisted in a bunch over blondie for like a fucking decade. Just fucking be the badass Alex that I know and take what's yours and fuck her senseless. Don't think I didn't notice that I interrupted something earlier. Vause, you deserve happiness."
Tires screeched as Nicky abruptly stopped at the entrance of the physical therapy office. "Tuck and roll, Vause. I'm going to park the car and call me when you're done and I will pull the car to the front. I have some business to handle aka I have to tell this chick that keeps calling me to fuck off." Alex rolled her eyes at Nicky and headed up for her appointment. Alex did not want to admit that she already missed the blonde only after a few hours. Normally, the younger woman would nag Alex to get ready so that they can leave early for the appointment since Piper would drive at a senior citizen's pace. During the car ride, the blonde would put on soothing music for the brunette claiming that it will relax her for her physical therapy. Piper would always be at the brunette's side during her exercises encouraging her and supporting her while taking notes on each exercise. Alex received great news at the appointment, she did not have to come to any more physical therapy sessions. She just had to continue some exercises at home. She felt that she had regained the majority of her strength and felt much more like herself. She was also happy that her best friend only had to play babysitter for the day. She loved Nicky but Nicky already made a mess of her place.
"Peace out, homeslice. You're all cleared so I'm out of this joint. I don't know how blondie did this for weeks. I'm fucking bored and it was only like half a day of being with your stupid ass."
"Thank god, I got cleared or else I probably would've shaved your head. See you later, you loudmouth."
Alex sank into her couch glad that Nicky was gone. Alex knew she was screwed, because the truth was she already missed Piper and her need to be her overbearing caretaker and it has not even been 24 hours. Fuck, stop thinking about her. But as luck would have it, Alex looked at her phone and couldn't stop the smile from forming on her face. It was a text message from Piper asking how her appointment went.
"Wipe that smile off your face, Vause" Alex told herself. "Be nonchalant and distant so you don't end up with your heart smashed into a million pieces again. She just feels obligated because you took a bullet for her. You are the drug-smuggling ex-girlfriend that nobody knew about because you are not someone that she would ever take home to her family. You were just a phase."
"I got cleared so I don't need you to come babysit me anymore! I guess I will see you around." Alex texted back to the blonde.
Piper was happy that Alex has recovered from the terrible incident but couldn't help but feel disappointed. She had spent three weeks at Alex's house and they had instantly fallen back into doing mundane things with each other like when they were together minus the sex. Piper and Alex would work from home, Piper would force Alex to eat organic foods, they would sit around reading, Piper would make Alex read to her at times, and they would laugh and easily banter back and forth.
Piper was almost done packing her clothes when her eyes landed on Alex's leather jacket that she never returned. She immediately put it on like she has frequently done since that rainy night basking in Alex's scent.
It was almost midnight and Piper couldn't sleep. She tried everything and was currently wrapped up in the leather jacket hoping Alex's scent would lull her to sleep. But it wasn't a substitute for Alex's warmth and she couldn't lace her fingers around Alex's warm ones like they did every night.
Alex was up watching TV because she couldn't sleep. Her thoughts were on a particular blonde and the knocking on her door stirred her from her thoughts. Figuring it was Nicky being Nicky at this hour, she went to the door to open it. It wasn't Nicky; it was the woman that was always on her mind.
"Piper, are you ok? It's late."
Piper stepped into the home, closing the door before pacing back and forth. "No, I'm not ok! You guess you will just see me around?! You can't just push me away. I can't SLEEP unless I'm right beside you. I can't do ANYTHING without having you on my mind! I feel like I can't fucking BREATHE unless you're near." I hate that you have this hold on me. I'm so sick of it!" the blonde angrily cried out.
"Pipes, go home. I think you're just really tired and still feel really guilty about what happened."
"Is that what you think?! Do you think I've just been helping out because I feel guilty?! Do you think I broke it off with Larry because I feel guilty?!"
"I think you're just confused and will go back to him after the guilt goes away."
"Fuck you, Alex! You still think I'm that 20 something year old that doesn't know what the hell she wants to do. I know I hurt you when I fucking left you in Paris but I'm not going anywhere!"
"Piper, I will always be the invisible woman. I'm not just going to be another phase to you when you decide that you a need socially acceptable or Chapman family acceptable other half."
"I'm sorry I said those things to Larry! I was afraid of losing the life I built after you! I'm sorry I hurt you with those words. The day after you were in the hospital, I broke things off with Larry. I told him that I only learned to love him because he was who I figured I should be with to be the perfect Piper Chapman. I told him and my family that I wasn't marrying him because I love you! I love you... Alex Vause... a woman! The woman I traveled the world with for three years not Polly. The woman I never fell out of love with. The only person I have ever been in love with!"
"You really told them that?" Alex asked disbelievingly.
"Yes," the blonde cried. "Those things we did, you and me, that wasn't adventure or a romp. That was my life. You're what I paid attention to, who I paid attention to. Everything else was just background. You were...ARE the love of my life. I kept the necklace because I love you. I have always loved you and will always love you. It's always been you. I know that I don't have the right to ask you this. I certainly don't deserve you, but Alex, will you please give me another chance? I'm not going anywhere. But I understand if you don't want me in your life. I'm a fuckup. I know that my track record is shit but I really do love you."
Alex stood there in silence.
"Alex, say something." the blonde pleaded.
Moistened emerald eyes flickered to watery blue ones. Alex opened her mouth but nothing came out. Emerald eyes closed as she shook her head still not saying anything.
Piper nodded her head sadly as tears flowed down her cheeks." It's ok, Alex. I understand. I won't bother you anymore." the blonde said with her voice cracking with emotion. With heavy footsteps, Piper opened the front door and stepped out of Alex's life.
AN:
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