Chapter Four:

Nuna (Luna/Neville)

Luna strode down the halls, arm in arm with Elis. They had been dating for months now, but it felt… false, somehow. Different, scary, like she had to be constantly aware of what she said or did—she didn't know why.

No, she did know why.

If she spoke about her fears, her worries, her nightmares, it would shatter their relationship. If she shared the dark depths of her demolished soul, Elis would leave. They always left.

Neville never left me, she thought, and shook her head. Luna had already done so much to him—providing him with the hope that Elis and she would break up, and the fact that they never would came around, it would just shatter him further.

But I promised, Luna shuddered. She hadn't wanted to say it, hadn't wanted to hope against hope that she could escape what foundation Elis had laid, what promises and vows she had whispered in his ear when they had been curled up in the Ravenclaw common room.

But she had said it.

Elis's attention was drawn towards her sudden movements and troubled face. "Is everything alright?" he asked, his brow creasing.

"Of course! Why wouldn't it be?" Luna said, the lie slipping off her lips easily. Lately, she had been lying to quite a few people. But not to Neville; never to Neville. No, he was too fragile, too…

Elis studied her. "I just wanted to make sure. You look a little… I don't know, breakable?"

Breakable.

That was the perfect word for describing Neville; he wasn't necessarily fragile, but if you told him the wrong thing, if he trusted in the wrong person, if he realized that no amount of courage could ever triumph over the shadows in his heart—

"I think I'll head back to the girls' dorm and lay down for a bit, then," Luna replied, her face and voice sunny despite the twisting, rolling darkness inside.

—he would break open, his heart and soul and mind too shattered, too broken to function.

That is no way to live.

"Alright then," Elis said, his eyes flecked with worry as he ran an eye over her. "Just… be careful, okay? I don't want you to have another…"

Incident.

Luna nodded as she turned around and strolled, a bit more briskly and faster than she was walking before, back down the hall. After she was out of Elis's view, she turned away from the hallway to the Ravenclaw common room and instead headed towards the library.

Incident.

When Neville had last found her, when she had been crying, it was after a breakdown. She had been talking to Elis out in the courtyard, and all of a sudden he had brought up how Hogwarts had been so expertly repaired. Luna had nodded along, but soon her thoughts drifted back to the war, back to the people she'd seen die, back to those horrible things…

She had screamed suddenly and ran, towards that corner, that safe house. She had sobbed her eyes out, but then Neville had come, Neville, who had to have been halfway across the castle when she had first got there. He still beat Elis there, still comforted her. Elis had finally found her, and after a long, long talk full of lies about stress and worry causing the breakdown, she had gone to bed.

The library's large wooden doors greeted Luna, and she absentmindedly waved her wand to open them and stepped inside.

Past the large wood slabs, there lay thousands of bookshelves filled to the brim with old tombs and books. Scrolls and notes perched precariously on the edges of shelves and tables. A stack of spare quills and ink bottles filled a cabinet to the left of the doorway.

Luna breathed in the smell of musty paper and leather, immediately feeling at ease. Grabbing an ink bottle, Luna fumbled in her pack for her favorite quill and a leather-bound book she had recently been writing in.

Pulling them out and taking a seat at the table, Luna spread out her supplies and flipped open the book and gazed at the pages. This wasn't a textbook, or notebook—no, this was a storybook, one that Luna herself was writing. It was a tale of magic, of a little witch named Luna and her struggles.

Her current chapter was labeled '5: the Absentminded Wish'. She flipped to the page and, for a moment, took in the gloriously blank paper. Her hand stilled, her breathing slowed, and Luna could hear the welcoming quiet of the library, where she could pour out her thoughts and feelings on paper without risking judgement by others.

With a shaking hand, Luna began to write.

Neville tried to breathe quietly.

Luna had come in the library a few minutes after him—had she been following him? Hopefully not, because that would be a little weird. Not that Luna wasn't weird, or that he didn't like her weirdness. I mean, I'm pretty weird myself, he thought.

He watched her pull supplies from her bag, and set down. At first, he thought she was writing over a textbook—which he would never have done—but a closer glance from a couple shelves down revealed that it was blank, and she was writing the story herself.

Neville strained to see the words from where he was. I wish I was as good as magic as Hermione, he thought. She probably had some spell to magnify his view. Unfortunately, he had to settle with sneaking around shelves and boxes to get closer to Luna—to see if he could read what she was writing.

Neville stopped a couple of rows away from where she sat at the long, wooden study table. The neat scrawl on the pages was still too small for him to read. He gave a quiet sigh, resigning himself to having to go over and talk to her to get to see it.

Pretending to have just gotten a book off the shelf, he stepped out of the aisle and feigned surprise. "Luna!" he exclaimed, trying to not be too loud as to give himself away.

She spun around, eyes wild, but considerably softened when she saw it was just him. "Hi, Neville," she said, a bit suspiciously. "What brings you here?"

"I ran out of things to read," he said. It wasn't necessarily a lie—all he had left to read was textbooks—but Luna bought it anyway.

"Great!" she said, her voice a bit far away. She beckoned him closer, and once he was standing by her side—the book was closed, goddammit. His curiosity was gonna kill him—and asked, "What books have you picked?"

Uhm. Neville quickly looked at the title of the book he was holding and swallowed. "How to Dance Like a Witc—wizard!" he choked out, hiding the book behind his back.

Luna looked ready to laugh. Neville, not wanting to embarrass himself more, quickly got to the point. "What's that?" he asked, pointing to the book.

Luna clammed up, her eyes flicking to the entrance and shelves of the library, like someone might be listening. "It's nothing," she said, a bit too quickly. At his lingering glance, she added, "Just a… story… I'm working on."

Like… a fairy tale? Neville wondered. Perhaps he was the prince in that story—if she even thought about him when he wasn't around. Unable to stand it, he asked, "Could I read it?"

Luna's mouth opened and closed, not unlike a fish. After a minute, she seemed resigned that he would keep bothering her about it unless she showed him. "Fine," Luna mumbled, flicking the book open to the first page and sliding it along the table.

1: An Unlikely Meet

She was lonely. So very lonely. Her mother had left her, years ago, but the pain still burned fresh. She sat in a hallway, crying, sobbing. The cold floors, the cold walls, the cold glass reminded her of how her mother's hands had felt as she slowly died, the sickness ebbing away at her—

"I realize it's not very good," Luna mumbled.

"No, no," Neville replied. "It's… it's nice."

She gave him a glance that said, This story is anything but nice. Neville shrugged, and skipped down a couple paragraphs.

—then, a mousy-haired boy came into the hallway. She felt him sit beside him, felt his breath on her back. He spoke softly, like she was a frightened animal. 'Are you okay?'

She was not okay. She was NEVER okay. But she couldn't tell him that. Couldn't share the darkness lurking underneath the bright, sunny surface. So she cried, cried even when on the outside he was brushing away the last of her tears.

Neville didn't know what to think. Was this… him? Regardless, he skipped to the most recent chapter and heard Luna suck in a breath. Glancing at her—she was turned away, ears burning—he returned to the book.

5; The Absentminded Wish

Why? She had made that promise. But why? She had Elis, that sturdy rock in this world of despair. But Elis had no idea, Elis couldn't share her fears, Elis couldn't UNDERSTAND. No one could, except that mousy-haired boy. And he could only because he had been touched by the same shadows, ripped apart by the same grief.

They were outcasts, and outcasts had nothing but each other.

Which is why she wanted so desperately to lunge, to cling on to Elis and any semblance of a normal life. Why she spent so much time socializing when all she wanted to do was sit in the hallway and stare at a wall, glimpsing the happy moments before everything. Went. To. Hell.

Regardless, she couldn't explain why the boy was so intriguing. Perhaps it was his lopsided smile, or the way that when he brushed her shoulder something sprang up inside her. Or how he walked down the hallway, like he was such a klutz that he couldn't trust himself to stay up. Or how adorably he came to show concern for her again, and again, and again.

But that fire, that fire that he brings—could it chase back the dark? Could he beat Elis's worth in her heart? She had to make a choice, but she didn't know what to choose. No, she didn't know which boy would end the shadows and darkness writhing inside her for good—the one who understood and faced his fears, or the one who could lead her to a normal life, regardless of how little she seemed to be attached to him now.

Elis was acting strange with her now, ever since the incident—so careful and cautious—

Luna slammed the book shut at the same time as Neville realized he had been mouthing the words. "That's enough for today," she said, face burning. "Just… it's enough."

Neville nodded wordlessly, and stood still as Luna quickly put her things away and turned to leave the library. It was only when she neared the doors that he snapped to his senses and asked, "Am I the mousy-haired boy?"

Luna turned around, the light from the hallway past the doors shining around her hair, like it was a halo shrouding her head. "Yes," she whispered, voice laden with emotion. "you are." And she turned around, her hair flying about her, her vivid blue eyes lined with silver, and raced down the hall.

Yes.

Neville couldn't believe it—he had a chance. And that… Elis had to be the long-haired, green eyed boy hanging out with Luna.

Yes.

Racing down the hall, regardless of how fast she ran, did nothing to erase the embarrassment written all over her face.

But regardless, Luna couldn't help the smile spreading across her face as she remembered how Neville's face had lit up as she told him he was the other boy, the one making her reconsider her love life.

Making her reconsider everything.

And the first time since the war, since the needless bloodshed that still haunted her dreams and memories, Luna felt… happy. Like she was floating on a bubble of air that could be popped any moment, so she'd best enjoy it while she could.

In that moment, Luna made a decision. That smile, the happiness in Neville's eyes, the understanding and that mirror-like reflection of her own soul staring back at her whenever she looked at his face...

Luna would keep her promise.

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Some things that are definitely happening in the next chapter are:

Elis has a surprise ;)

Luna has inspiration

Neville gets to paint and have plants

Hermione meets Luna and they start making something

Draco and Neville have an alliance

Ron gets... well, his fair share.

Harry pops up for a surprise meeting

Veronica gets... her fair share.

Can't wait for the next chapter!

...WaitImTheOneWritingItDoesThatEvenMakeSense...