Greetings, one and all, to the fanfiction called :Welcome to the Philippines! with our hosts and favorite characters: Felipe, Emman, Basty and Danny de los Reyes. Featuring other countries such as USA, Spain and probably others... we give you Memories and Video Tapes! Enjoy!

Ang pagiging isang bakla. (Being a gay.) [It's not what it sounds like!... maybe?]

"Hahaaaayyyy... Ang boring~" Emman cooed as he slumped back on the bench. It was that day of the week that they had to go and help (coughforcedcough) Felipe in shopping. And by "help", I mean just sitting around the waiting line with free wifi and eating junk while their brother went out to buy almost everything in the mall.

Sometimes, the trio would think if Felipe is secretly a woman, or at least gay... but that would be absurd seeing that he gets along fine with all the other Asian Nations , who are [probably] pretty much women and with his SECRET CRUSH ON BRUNEI, EVERYBODY. (Felipe: S-shut up, Author!)

"Wala namang interesting na mga chikabebes ngayon," Emman sighed. (There's no more interesting chicabebes these days -for those who don't know, chikabebes are just a combined term for 'chicks' and 'babes'.)

"OA ra ka," Basty snapped, rolling his eyes. (You're just overreacting). The short one sighed and muttered angrily, "Peste ba 'tong buang, batjon jud 'to nahu 'ja." (That fucking idiot- "peste" in Visayan/Maasinhon, is a bad word or a cuss - I'm gonna kill him.)

His phone vibrated. He took it out of his pocket then checked the caller ID. Spain.

Fuck.

Just as his day couldn't get any worse. The eldest of the three groaned, stood up from his seat. "I'll be back, you two, just need to handle some 'things'." Then he moved walked away, with a grumpy 'Hello?' and a few cusses.

Danny followed suit, saying he needed to find a new sketchpad, leaving the tallest behind.

"Ahhh..." Emman sighed, slumping onto the bench he was sitting on. "No stupid brothers annoying me... finally..." (Ariel happened to me~ /slapped/)

"YO EMMAN! PHILIPPINES, YOOHOOO!"

The said Filipino cringed. N-no! I-it can't be! Right? I mean, it can't be the same annoying voice as HIS voice right. No way, it can't be him! That's plain ridiculous! There was no strange and supposedly weird meeting held here in the Phils. again right? Those thoughts circulated in Luzon's mind in panic.

His left eye twitched as he looked to where the obnoxious sound came from, and to his misfortune, it was him.

America.

"Lets-" he was about to cuss but stopped midway as an elderly woman looked at him in disgust, holding her children protectively. "Lechon kamatis," he said instead in hopes that it didn't insult the woman. Thankfully, the woman walked away along with her children peacefully.

When he turned again, he almost jumped as the American was sitting right beside him. Since when did Americans have teleportation powers? I thought England was the only one that can do that... he thought.

Emman glared at the foreign intruder. "What the hell do you want now?" he growled.

The perky country grinned and replied: "Well, since your Big Bro is having problems with the 'ladies' (aka the new typhoons), I decided to help him out. He texted me to meet him here."

Ahh, that made sense. Felipe made an excuse, dragged them all here just to put some 'protection' to ward off the possible coming typhoons. As if wasting more money is gonna help them. They're probably bankrupt by now.

"That explains a lot..." the Filipino grumbled.

"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be helping your brother shopping?" the blond asked.

"Shouldn't you be back home guarding your children?" (yeah I'll probably include the states here just to let you know...) Emman retorted.

"Hey! My children are perfectly fine at taking care of themselves," Alfred protested.

"Right..." Emman said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

There was a heavy moment of silence before Alfred spoke again.

"You look bored," he stated.

Emman sighed. "That's cuz I am."

"How come? I mean, there are TONS of hot chicks around here!" America exclaimed. Emman glared. "Metaphorically speaking that is," the first nervously added. He suddenly pointed in front of them. "Like that one for example."

Emman's eyes widened and immediately pushed the foreigner's hand down. "Dude, what are you pointing at?!"

"What?" Alfred asked dumbly as Emman looked in disgust and horror at him. "Isn't that, like, a girl? Or do you not know what a girl is? Either way, I'm cool with it."

"A gir- oh, of course it's NOT a girl!" the Filipino vexed. He looked at the 'girl' then back to the American. "Well, mostly!"

"What do you mean mean 'mostly'?" America asked cocking his head to the left. Then realization hit him like a rock to his head. "Y-You don't mean- I mean, but how would you know?"

"There's a thing called gay-dar. When you live in this place, you'll eventually develop it."

"S-so, that really means that-"

"Oh, yeah." The Filipino nodded.

"Holy shit. Oh, my God... what the hell?!" The American perplexed. "How is that even possible?! A guy can't look like a girl that good! Oh my- Why are there so many gay people in this country?!"

Bomb just dropped.

Emman raised his eyebrow. "Excuse me? What do you mean by that exactly?" he said. "I mean, I know that the idea of having sexual relationships with a person of the same gender is disgusting, and when I say I know, I mean it. But seriously? You're blaming us?!"

"Uh, do I have to repeat myself? Like, you guys are the ones in charge of this place!" America replied. "Can't you at least try to minimize the homosexuality of the place?!"

"Well I can't choose how people want themselves to be! I'm not the boss of them!"

"But dude, it's disturbing!"

"Says the country who legalized same-sex marriage!"

"It wasn't my choice! My children (the states) managed to trick me into signing their 'school papers'."

"Well, that's just sad! But I don't care, because we are through with this conversation!"

"Fine, then!"

"OKAY!"

"ALFRED! YOU'RE HERE ALREADY?!"

The country and the Filipino turned to where the voice came from. It was Felipe's, trying on what seemed to be a white apron with pink floral designs. "Can you wait there a bit? I'm just looking for something to give Guam, you know how much she loves cooking." He looked to Danny, "Is this okay?"

"Actually, America."

"What?"

"You're right, we need to minimize the gayness of this place."

"I'm sorry too. I did NOT know how hard your life was."

There! Whoo! Finished it! Parallel, I finished it! I'm sorry guys, I really wanted to delete this, but the gayness won't allow me to do itXD

So um... there won't be replies today, I'm at my school. ^^' Sorry.