Chapter Twenty-Four

Tutankhamun smoothed his hand across Suhad's forehead, noting the cool, clammy feel to her skin which indicated that her fever had finally broken. That small bit of progress should have renewed his hope in her recovery but, instead, it filled him with dread. She was just beginning to gain strength at a time when he would not be there to monitor her progress or protect her from potential enemies. He would be leaving her soon and the future that lay ahead of him was filled with uncertainty.

In just an hour's time, he, his small band of forty men and a backup battalion would set off for the Mitanni stronghold. His hope was that in three weeks time the Mitanni threat would either be vanquished completely or, at least, cowed enough so that they were no longer a threat to his land. If not, Egypt would be conquered and everything he knew would be changed forever. Either way, the conflict would be over. For the sake of his land, his people and most especially the woman who lay before him and the child she carried Tutankhamun had to accomplish the former.

He bent forward to press a trembling kiss of farewell to Suhad's temple and whispered against her ear, unshed tears making his words gruff in quality, "My love, I must leave you now but, when I return, you and I shall be married and we will raise our son as heir to my throne. And we will once again visit the pyramids and our secret oasis."

"I...think...I...should like that..."

Startled, Tutankhamun reared back with a soundless gasp, completely stunned to find Suhad regarding him with a drowsy smile and a heavy lidded stare. With a yelp of joy, he immediately gathered her up into his arms, embracing her with enough force to temporarily force the breath from her lungs. He burrowed his face in the hollow of her neck, unable to stifle the sobs that welled from his chest. "You're awake! Thank the gods, you're finally awake!"

"Ow...ow...ow..." Suhad groaned weakly, "Not so tightly, please...I hurt everywhere."

Tutankhamun immediately loosened his hold on her and gently situated her back against the bed, murmuring his apologies. He knew he should probably call for the physician right away but he was so overwhelmed by the reality that he was talking to her at all that he was reluctant to divert his attention from her even temporarily. "I did not intend to cause you pain. I'm just so, so happy to see you awake again. It feels like ages since we've spoken to one another."

"What happened to me?" she asked, her tone groggy, "My head is pounding and body feels as if it weighs a thousand pounds. Why am I so weary?"

"You were very badly injured. You almost died."

Her brow furrowed as she struggled to piece together memories that were mostly a fog in her mind. "Died?' she echoed fuzzily before her eyes flared wide and her hands flew to her abdomen protectively, "Oh no! Did I...is the baby-?"

"-Our child lives," Tutankhamun reassured her with a smile, "He is strong and active. I'm surprised you did not wake sooner with all the fuss he's been making."

As if to add validity to his father's words, the baby gave a definitive kick just below her ribcage. Suhad grunted a small laugh, her eyelids sinking closed with relief and fatigue. "I heard you talking to me before. It felt as if I was in a dark, cold place and you were the warm light. I followed your voice...and you led me home."

Fearful that he would break down in front of her, Tutankhamun attempted to distract himself from the lump of pure emotion forming in his throat. "I'll get you some water. You haven't had much to drink in the last four days."

She didn't realize how thirsty she was until the cup touched her parched lips. Suhad downed three full cups before finally wilting back into the pillows with a satisfied sigh. Afterwards, she favored Tutankhamun with a small smile. "It seems we've come full circle, have we not? We began this entire affair with me taking care of you after your injury and now here you are taking care of me."

He brushed his knuckles across the ridge of her cheek. "I didn't do much...mostly I've sat with you and held your hand when I was able."

Suhad reached up to capture his hand and brought it to her lips. "That was enough. I love you." She smiled against his mouth when he peppered firm, loving kisses against her own. Suhad couldn't yet discern all the reasons why he seemed so emotional and distressed but she was glad to be with him. That was all that mattered. They rested their foreheads together, nestling against one another, content merely breathe each other in and be close.

Tutankhamun kissed her once more but this time the gesture was tempered with sadness, almost as if he were saying goodbye... "Oh my love..." he murmured in a mournful tone, "I wish we could have more time together."

"Why can't we?" When he didn't answer right away and, instead, pulled away from her with a shuttered expression on his face, Suhad felt the first tendrils of apprehension prickle at the back of her neck. "You said that I've been unconscious for four days," she observed quietly, puzzled by his inexplicable change in demeanor, "How was I injured?"

"You were found in the quarantine near death," he told her, "No one knows how you came to be there. Have you any idea why you would have left the palace that night or who you were with at the time?"

"The quarantine?" Suhad balked, "No. I can't imagine why I would have been there." She wracked her brain, trying desperately to recall the circumstances that would have led her to being outside of the palace but her mind produced only fuzzy, disjointed images. "The last clear memory I have is speaking to Lagus about your plans for the sick that night." Tutankhamun flinched at the reminder. "Did you go through with it after all?"

"I had little choice," he uttered gruffly.

She groped for his hand where it lay between them and squeezed his fingers when he would have shrank away from her in shame. "Oh, my love, I am so sorry you had to make such an impossible decision. And I especially regret that you had to do so on your own. All I wanted that night was to be by your side."

He surveyed her timidly from beneath his lashes. "You do not despise me for it?"

"I could not despise you for anything," she whispered, "You are my heart."

Unable to help himself, he bent forward to kiss her again, the salt of his tears mingling with her own. "I love you," he said again and again, "I love you so much..." Suhad clasped him to her aa tightly as she could and turned into his body, inundated with the same undeniable need to profess her love for him as well.

"My lord, forgive my intrusion, but it is time."

Tutankhamun and Suhad broke apart at the sound of Lagus' discreet greeting but did not relinquish their hold on one another as they swiveled their bodies to regard the commander upon his entry. Suhad lifted her head and smiled at Lagus warmly, delighting in his utter look of shock when he saw her. "Lagus...my friend. It is good to see you."

Lagus' typically unreadable features positively beamed with an overjoyed smile as he registered Suhad's restored state. "Well, look who has returned from the arms of Osiris!" he laughed, "I never doubted for a single second that you would rally. You're much too obstinate."

"I'll take that as a compliment, thank you kindly. As for rejecting Osiris' arms...it wasn't a difficult choice," Suhad teased irreverently. She slid a meaningful look in Tutankhamun's direction. "There are other arms that I much prefer."

"Can I assume this means you will not accompany us after all?" Lagus asked Tutankhamun, "Shall I inform General Horemheb and the men?"

Suhad bounced a confused look between the two of them, keenly noting the silent conversation that seemed to pass between Lagus and Tutankhamun in those few seconds. "Accompany you where? Why do you both look so grim all of a sudden? What is happening?"

"We are to march on the Mitanni shortly," Tutankhamun told her, "It can no longer wait."

As he expected, Suhad did not receive the news well. She began firing questions at him, one after another. "You're going into battle?" she burst out in rising panic, "When? Why? What has happened to require such urgency?"

"We are to leave within the hour," Lagus explained, "If we are to survive, Suhad, then we must strike first. But the pharaoh is not under any obligation to accompany us." He directed an encouraging look at Tutankhamun. "I know the plan and I can lead the men in your stead if you wish to remain here with Suhad. No one would begrudge you. We well know how fervently you have prayed for her recovery."

Tutankhamun could feel Suhad's earnest gaze boring into him and it tore him apart to deny her and himself as well. He regarded her with a mournful look before turning towards Lagus with a shake of his head. "The offer is tempting, my friend, and I want to stay more than you realize but, we both know I cannot. I began this endeavor and I must see it through to the end."

"Then I will give you time to say your goodbyes to one another," Lagus said, "Suhad, it is good to see you recovered. We will talk again soon."

After he had withdrawn, Suhad struggled to position herself upright against the pillows, clearly confused and distraught. "You're leaving? I don't understand!" she cried, "What is happening? What has changed so drastically in four days that you must go into battle now?"

"Prince Ti'sata came to us as an envoy for his father," Tutankhamun explained, "He brought with him an ultimatum...our unconditional surrender or complete annihilation. If we do not act now, the Mitanni will come against us with all the force they have and we will not be able to stand. I have devised a plan to ambush them and, hopefully, free Egypt from this threat permanently."

"I...I want to come with you. We have had enough time apart and you need me!" She started to throw back the covers but Tutankhamun stilled her intentions to climb from the bed. Suhad bounced a frowning look from his restraining hand to his face. "What are you doing?"

"What are you doing? You cannot accompany me, Suhad, and you know it," he admonished softly, "You are still weak from illness, not to mention you are full with child. The battlefield is no place for a woman, particularly one who is on the verge of giving birth!"

"It will be weeks before this child is born!"

"You cannot risk it," he stated in an unyielding tone, "I will not risk it."

"I followed you into the Mitanni fortress before and fought alongside you," she argued, "This is no different. I will stay far from the battle, if that is your worry."

"That is not my worry. This is not at all like when we went after Lagus together, which, if you recall, was not what I wanted then either."

"Yet, if you recall, we met with success because we were together."

He pressed a tender kiss to her forehead in the hope that the gesture would both express his gratitude and soften his refusal. "My beautiful, brave love...you know that I cannot take you with me."

Though she knew full well that his reasoning was valid, Suhad continued to plead with him. "I do not wish to stay behind. Please, allow me to accompany you. I have always stood at your side, Khaten."

"I know you have...and you will again, my love. But not this time."

Suhad blinked back the hot tears that welled in her eyes. "I feel as if we have lost all of this time together and now I am faced with the prospect of saying goodbye to you. It feels too sudden. I am not ready."

"I feel the same," he confessed thickly, "Believe me, I do not wish to leave you, Suhad."

"When will you return?" she asked in a suffocated tone.

"The hope is that we will resolve this conflict in three weeks and then I will come home to you." Tutankhamun rested his hand against her belly and favored her with a hopeful look. "Just in time for the birth of our son." He offered her a wobbly smile of encouragement, his heart lightened considerably when she tentatively returned one of her own. "I will return, my love. I have all the incentive in the world now."

She drew him close for her kiss, her tears flowing freely. "I will hold you to that. Remember what you told me...there is to be no more broken promises between us."

"I have not forgotten," he whispered against her lips. They shared several more desperate kisses before Tutankhamun finally found the wherewithal to pull away. By that time, they were both visibly raw with emotion. It took several moments before Tutankhamun was composed enough to speak again. "Listen to me. I leave you in very dangerous times. You must guard yourself carefully in my absence as you will be mostly unprotected here," he warned Suhad fervidly, "You are to trust no one, my love."

"Except your sister, of course," she sighed with an ironic smile.

She was stunned, however, when he dismissed her teasing with a terse shake of his head. "No, Suhad. This is very important. Trust no one, Suhad, especially Ankhesenamun. She has motives that are not completely clear to me."

His words provoked a chill of foreboding within Suhad. "You have always been your sister's greatest champion. What has happened to make you wary of her?"

"It is difficult to explain in the short time that I have with you," he said, "Just please...maintain your guard with her and I will return to you as soon as I can."

Suhad was still much too feeble to personally see Tutankhamun off into battle but she managed to hobble to the balcony nonetheless to watch him, Lagus, the general and the men with them mount their chariots in preparation to ride out. As they did, Suhad thought about Tutankhamun's departing warning, her mind a jumble with the possible reasons for his sudden suspicion of the queen. However, her worry was momentarily forgotten when Tutankhamun threw a glance up at her and nodded his goodbye. She blew him a kiss and watched as he and his army galloped away and disappeared through the gates.

As their figures disappeared into the distance, Suhad was suddenly was struck with the strange and portentous sense that she would not see Tutankhamun again for a long time to come. Her heart seized with cold terror, so much so that she was compelled by the rash desire to ride out after him. But just as abruptly as the idea surfaced Suhad shook off the premonition, telling herself that she was being overanxious. It was merely an understandable attack of nerves due to the fact the man she loved had just ridden off into battle. The fear had no merit, she told herself firmly, none at all.

In spite of her persisting fatigue, Suhad continued to linger outside on the balcony long after Tutankhamun had gone. When she wasn't puzzling over his cryptic admonition to her, she was trying desperately to piece together the events that had transpired prior to her injury. The memory stayed just on the edges of her consciousness, almost there but cloaked in shadows. She had the very strong sense that something of utmost importance had compelled her to venture outside of the palace walls but she could not recall what that something had been.

Filled with determination to find the answers she sought, Suhad might have remained out there for the remainder of the evening had Tutankhamun's physician not found her and ushered her back into bed with strict instructions for her to remain there. "You are still recovering," he admonished her, "You must not tax yourself or the babe."

He fussed over her, emphasizing her need for food and rest before briskly examining both her and her unborn child. Suhad tried to maintain her patience listened and tested and took his needed measurements. The physician had just finished declaring both of them in good health when Ankhesenamun entered her chambers. Recalling Tutankhamun's earlier warning, Suhad immediately became tense though she was careful to mask her disquietude in the queen's presence.

Ankhesenamun favored her with a careful smile. "I had heard you were recovered," she said, "How are you feeling?"

"Tired. Confused," Suhad replied, "I only had a short time with Tutankhamun before he left for battle. He told me that I went out of the palace the night of the quarantine. Do you have any idea why I would have done that?"

"Why would I know?"

Suhad appraised her with a speculative look. "Because I seem to recall I was with you earlier in the evening."

"Do you not remember what happened the remainder of that night?"

Suhad shook her head. "It's all disjointed in my mind. As I said, I have a vague memory of talking with you but I cannot be certain if I did or not. I was wondering if I might have said something to you about my plans."

"No," Ankhesenamun lied smoothly, "We spoke only briefly that night because you were distraught over what happened in the market. You said nothing to me of why you wanted to go. Nothing at all."

"I'm afraid she needs her rest, my queen," the physician interjected firmly, "Perhaps you could postpone your visit for a more convenient time?"

Ankhesenamun inclined her head in an compliant nod. "Of course. We shall speak again after you have had more time to recover, Suhad."

After she was gone, Suhad relaxed against the pillows and tipped back her head to favor the physician with a grateful smile. "Thank you."

"There is no need for that, child. The Pharaoh entrusted me with your well being in his absence, as well as that of his child's. I will not allow you to be subjected to any undue stress."

Outside of Tutankhamun's chambers, Ankhesenamun was breathing her own sigh of relief which very nearly gave way to a yelp of pure fright when she was immediately intercepted by the vizier as she made her exit. "Why must you continually lurk about that way?" she hissed at him, "You well know how much it aggravates me!"

"Forgive me, my queen, but I am anxious to know what you have learned. What did she say to you?"

"She remembers nothing of that night. She told Tutankhamun nothing."

Although the news was reassuring, Ay still could not relax. "Are you certain of this? Perhaps she is merely baiting you in an attempt to discern the truth."

"I am certain. She is not that clever," Ankhesenamun dismissed, "Besides the two of us, she is the only one who knows for certain what happened that night. Sete is with the gods now. He cannot speak on the matter. You have nothing to fear."

"I do not fear for myself, but for you, my queen. After all, it was not I who sent her into the flames."

"Oh yes, of course. You've insulated yourself quite well as you often do," the queen spat reproachfully, "Yet, I well know you are uncertain of your position with the Pharaoh, Ay. He continues to alienate you just as he is alienating me and, more and more, he rejects your counsel in favor of seeking advice elsewhere. It is clear that his trust is shaken in us both."

"What must be done?"

"Nothing," the queen advised softly, "We wait. I spoke with him briefly before he departed. He is angry with me and suspicious, that much is true, but he does not want to believe the worst in me. I have not lost his love completely, Ay. He will come to trust me again. Give him time."

"And as for me?"

"I will encourage him to seek your counsel once more...when matters are settled."

"That will not happen if he learns the truth about how Suhad came to be in the quarantine," Ay warned.

"And how will he learn of it?" Ankhesenamun challenged with haughty bravado, "I certainly won't tell him! Will you? Suhad cannot recall the events of that night. It is possible that she never will given the trauma she suffered. Matters will settle themselves eventually."

"You seem confident."

"I have faith that the gods will not strip me of everything I hold dear."

"What if you are wrong, my queen, and she does remember? What shall be your recourse then?"

"My recourse? You act as if your hands are completely clean in this!"

"I merely provided you with the options that night. It was your choice to execute them."

Ankhesenamun speared him with a narrowed glare. "It's quite cunning how you have managed to set all of this in motion while keeping yourself completely without spot."

"Please, do not mistake me. This is not an attempt at self-preservation. I will always protect you, my queen," Ay vowed, "I am merely pointing out that you cannot afford to be willfully blind at this time or reckless. You must be prudent and have a plan in place should the situation not turn in your favor."

"She will not remember," Ankhesenamun maintained, "But...if she does, I will deal with the problem. You should have no fear of dirtying your hands. Sete's blood is already upon my own. What is a little more at this juncture?"

"So when you say 'deal' you mean..."

"She is still quite weak and recovering from her harrowing ordeal," the queen considered, "It would not be unthinkable in this precarious time if she succumbed to her injuries."

"Were that to happen, the child would perish with her. It may well be the Pharaoh's last opportunity to continue his bloodline."

Ankhesenamun faltered slightly at that reasoning, knowing full well how important it was to her brother that he produce an heir. Hesitancy over her proposed plan bloomed in her heart briefly before she deliberately quelled it. "The...the gods may yet decide to show me favor. I could still bear him a son. Suhad's child will not prove to be his saving grace."

"It is a risk and the question is, are you willing to take it and bear the brunt of the consequences? Could your conscience truly allow you to go through with such a course of action, my queen?"

"I will do whatever I must to keep my kingdom, Ay," Ankhesenamun told him firmly, "and my brother."