Disclaimer: Everything you recognize is J.K. Rowling's except for Jamie, Luka, and Ariana.
Chapter 2- Procuring Potter
The peace of the Burrow early next morning is shattered by the angry yell of one Percy Weasley. "YOU NITWITS! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, EVEN THE MINISTER OF MAGIC WON'T BE ABLE TO SAVE YOU!" With a groan I roll over, and bring my pillow down over my head.
It's too early to be dealing with this ruckus today, especially with the remnants of last night's nightmare still playing behind my eyelids. "Calm down Percy!" The voice of Mr. Weasley is heard outside of our landing. Ginny moans and kicks the bedpost, shaking our bed.
"Make it stop." She whines.
"I WILL NOT! DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE MAGNITUDE OF WHAT THEY'VE DONE? THESE PAPERS ARE OF THE UTMOST IMPORTANCE IN A TREATY THAT MY OFFICE HAS BEEN WORKING ON FOR WEEKS!" He bellows.
With a scowl I sit up from my bed and allow my pillow to flop back onto my mattress. Ginny is now whimpering at he noise. Usually the girl is an early riser during school, but I guess that the same can't be said for the summer. I swing my legs over the side, and with a push, I'm on the ground. I rub at my eyes blearily, and make my way for the door.
"Now Percy I'm sure that it was just an accident. Fred, and George would never do anything to purposefully harm your work." Mr. Weasley says again. I open the door to my room, and look out into the hall to see Mr. Weasley holding back a livid Percy who has a stack of bright pink papers clutched in his hand.
"Oh you don't know what they're like Father! They will do literally anything to bother me!" Percy declares. With that Percy puts his nose in the air and spins around to vanish straight back into his room. Mr. Weasley runs a hand over his face and sighs.
"What am I going to do with those boys?" He sighs. I shift my weight onto a creaky floorboard, and his face shoots up to see me. A smile comes to it.
"Jamie! Why are you up so early my girl? I daresay that the rest of the house besides Molly dear is still fast asleep!" He exclaims coming over to me.
"I heard shouting… did the twins do anything to Percy's paper? The last thing we did was explode the bomb." I say softly trying to disturb Ginny in her sleep.
Mr. Weasley grins and chuckles. "I suspect that they might have done some covert pranking last night, but never fear, I hardly think we'll find enough evidence in which to punish them."
I bite my lip and nod my head in response. "Are you all right there Jamie?" Mr. Weasley asks me placing his hand on my shoulder. I startle slightly and look up into his concerned blue eyes.
"I'm fine, just didn't sleep all that well last night is all." I tell him with a shaky smile hoping that he will believe my lie. He gives me a long look, but unlike his wife he smiles back at me as well, and doesn't push the subject.
"Well then, you best be moving along then if you want first crack at the shower. Early start today I expect, Molly will be rousing the troops for food and cleaning any moment I suspect." He tells me patting my shoulder as he descends the stairs. I grimace at having to lie to the man. Both Weasley parents have been nothing but great to my brother and me, but there are some things that not even adults should know.
Breakfast that morning is fast and chaotic. Mrs. Weasley is officially in panic mode, and the rest of us are suffering for it. From my set in between Ginny and George I'm able to question the twins about the papers of Percy's.
"Oh that? Well it turns out that when left alone in aerosol form in room temperature for too long that the compound will solidify and stick to surfaces. Turns our Percy's whole room is pink not just those papers of his." George snickers quietly dodging the nasty glare that Percy sends his way.
I can't help but cover my mouth to stop the laughter as well. By the time breakfast is over, we've all been assigned our last minute jobs of getting the house in 'presentable' order. Personally I don't see why she cares so much; the house looks fine and like people actually live here.
I'm just finishing my job of mopping up the entire staircase, when Mr. Weasley pops into the living room. "Okay, well we're off to go get Harry now!" He exclaims. Fred, George, and Ron are with him. My head shoots up at my friend's name.
"Harry! Can I come with you? I'm done with the stairs promise! I've always wanted to see a muggle house before!" I cry. Mr. Weasley smiles at me fondly, nodding his head and motioning me forward towards the fireplace with the rest of them.
"Okay you lot listen up! I'll go first and the rest of you follow me okay!" Mr. Weasley declares. We nod our heads, and watch as Mr. Weasley steps into the fire. He says the name of Harry's house while throwing the powder and he's gone. Fred and George move up and do the same. It comes to be my turn and I grin at Ron.
"We get to see Harry now." I tell him. With that I say his address and throw the powder vanishing with a turn of my stomach. That is until I hit something hard and bony and get unpleasantly squished in the process. I can hear voices as well.
"Ouch! Fred, no — go back, go back, there's been some kind of mistake — tell George not to — OUCH! George, no, there's no room, go back quickly and tell Jamie, wait no Ron —"
With an oomph the air is knocked out of me, as Ron slams into me from behind causing everyone in confined fireplace to groan. This is way too close to the Weasley boys than I ever wanted to be! Not to mention that someone's knee is in my spine rather painfully.
"Maybe Harry can hear us, Dad — maybe he'll be able to let us out —" We all start frantically pounding on the wall in front of us.
"Harry? Harry, can you hear us?" I yell.
"Mr. Weasley? Jamie? Can you hear me?" Harry's voice appears. We stop hammering. "Shh!"
"Mr. Weasley, it's Harry . . . the fireplace has been blocked up. You won't be able to get through there."
"Damn!" says Mr. Weasley's voice. "What on earth did they want to block up the fireplace for?"
"They've got an electric fire," Harry explains. Why would they do such a thing as that? I swear that I truly don't understand muggles. Maybe I should have taken Muggle Studies.
"Really?" says Mr. Weasley's voice excitedly. "Eclectic, you say? With a plug? Gracious, I must see that. . . . Let's think . . ."
"Ouch Ron!" I cry. Ron has kicked me in the spleen I think.
"What are we doing here? Has something gone wrong?" Ron asks from behind me. Someone pulls my hair and I hiss in pain.
"Oh no, Ron," comes Fred's voice, very sarcastically. "No, this is exactly where we wanted to end up."
"Yeah, we're having the time of our lives here," says George, whose voice sounds muffled, as though he is squashed against the wall.
"Boys, boys . . ." says Mr. Weasley vaguely. "I'm trying to think what to do. . . . Yes . . . only way . . . Stand back, Harry."
Oh thank you Merlin finally someone is going to do something about this horrible situation.
BANG. The electric fire shoots across the room as the boarded-up fireplace bursts outward, expelling Mr. Weasley, Fred, George, Ron, and I in a cloud of rubble and loose chippings. Harry's aunt Petunia shrieks and falls backwards over the coffee table; his uncle Vernon catches her before she hits the floor, and gapes, speechless, at the Weasleys and me as we tumble to the floor in a heap.
"That's better," pants Mr. Weasley, brushing dust from his long green robes and straightening his glasses. "Ah — you must be Harry's aunt and uncle!"
I groan I stretch out my cramped limbs painfully. I rub at the back of my head from where it was hit; a cramped little greeting room, and the frightening sight of the Dursleys greet me.
Tall, thin, and balding, Mr. Weasley moves towards uncle Vernon, his hand outstretched, but he backs away several paces, dragging aunt Petunia. Words utterly fail uncle Vernon. His best suit is covered in white dust, which has settled in his hair and mustache and makes him look as though he has just aged thirty years.
"Er — yes — sorry about that," says Mr. Weasley, lowering his hand and looking over his shoulder at the blasted fireplace. "It's all my fault. It just didn't occur to me that we wouldn't be able to get out at the other end. I had your fireplace connected to the Floo Network, you see — just for an afternoon, you know, so we could get Harry. Muggle fireplaces aren't supposed to be connected, strictly speaking — but I've got a useful contact at the Floo Regulation Panel and he fixed it for me. I can put it right in a jiffy, though, don't worry. I'll light a fire to send the boys back, and then I can repair your fireplace before I Disapparate."
"Hello, Harry!" says Mr. Weasley brightly. "Got your trunk ready?"
"It's upstairs," says Harry, grinning back. I beam at my friend. Its been far too long. He's grown taller as well.
"We'll get it," says Fred at once. Winking at Harry, he and George leave the room. They knew where Harry's bedroom is, all of us having once rescued him from it in the dead of night. I suspect that Fred and George are hoping for a glimpse of Dudley; they have heard a lot about him from Harry.
I grin and bounce over to Harry throwing my arms around him in a tight hug. "Its good to see you again Harry! I can't believe that we got stuck in there! I never wanted to be that close to those boys in my life!" I cry. Harry chuckles, and squeezes me back as well.
I look up and see the looks of distaste clear on Harry's aunt and uncle's faces. I pull back from Harry a little blushing at the sudden attention that was attracted to us. What? I girl can't hug her friend that she hasn't seen in a long time anymore? Ron is standing there with a nervous and dumbfounded look on his face.
I release Harry and take a step back, suddenly unsure of if I did the right thing of hugging him while in this house.
"Well," says Mr. Weasley, swinging his arms slightly, while he tries to find words to break the very nasty silence. "Very — erm — very nice place you've got here."
This remark doesn't seem to go down too well with the Dursleys. Uncle Vernon's face purples once more, and Aunt Petunia starts chewing her tongue again. However, they seem too scared to actually say anything.
Mr. Weasley is looking around. He loves everything to do with Muggles. I can see him itching to go and examine the odd screened contraptions in the corner.
"They run off eckeltricity, do they?" he says knowledgeably. "Ah yes, I can see the plugs. I collect plugs," he adds to Uncle Vernon. "And batteries. Got a very large collection of batteries. My wife thinks I'm mad, but there you are."
Uncle Vernon clearly thinks Mr. Weasley is mad too. He moves ever so slightly to the right, screening Aunt Petunia from view, as though he thinks Mr. Weasley might suddenly run at them and attack. I wish, that would at least be amusing, but that isn't going to be happening.
A very large boy with a chubby face appears in the room. A flat mop of blond hair sits on top his head, and his blue eyes are watery. I can hear the clunk of Harry's trunk coming down the stairs. The boy makes his way for his parents but freezes when he catches sight of me.
I raise my eyebrow at him questioningly. So this must be Dudley. Poor boy, it looks like it must hurt to think, by the looks of him. I don't understand why he's staring at me though. A pink flush comes to his cheeks. "H-hi I'm Dudley." The boy stammers offering me a small wave. Okay this is ridiculous.
I raise my hand in return, and his mother reaches out and snatches him to her side leveling me the most evil glare that she can. What on earth is that all about? I swear, I don't understand muggles at all. Harry glances at me his eyes twinkling, and I can tell that he's attempting to smother a laugh.
"Ah, this is your cousin, is it, Harry?" says Mr. Weasley, taking another brave stab at making conversation.
"Yep," says Harry, "that's Dudley." Quite a stunning example of poor personal care that one certainly is, Harry had mentioned that the whole family has to go on diet because of him and his weight issues.
"Having a good holiday, Dudley?" Mr. Weasley says kindly. Dudley whimpers. I see his hands tighten over his massive backside.
Fred and George come back into the room carrying Harry's school trunk. They glance around as they enter and spot Dudley. Their faces crack into identical evil grins. Oh no, I think that I know where this is going.
"Ah, right," says Mr. Weasley. "Better get cracking then." He pushes up the sleeves of his robes and takes out his wand. I see the Dursleys draw back against the wall as one.
"Incendio!" says Mr. Weasley, pointing his wand at the hole in the wall behind him.
Flames rise at once in the fireplace, crackling merrily as though they have been burning for hours. Mr. Weasley takes a small drawstring bag from his pocket, unties it, takes a pinch of the powder inside, and throws it onto the flames, which turns emerald green and roars higher than ever.
"Off you go then, Fred," says Mr. Weasley.
"Coming," says Fred. "Oh no — hang on —"
A bag of sweets has spilled out of Fred's pocket and the contents are now rolling in every direction — big, fat toffees in brightly colored wrappers. Oh I know those. Those we worked on earlier. This will be interesting.
Fred scrambles around, cramming them back into his pocket, then gives the Dursleys a cheery wave, steps forward, and walks right into the fire, saying "the Burrow!" Aunt Petunia gives a little shuddering gasp. There is a whooshing sound, and Fred vanishes.
Okay it is amusing watching muggles witness magic I must admit. Then again, they haven't ever seen it before.
"Right then, George," says Mr. Weasley, "you and the trunk." Harry helps George carry the trunk forward into the flames and turn it onto its end so that he can hold it better. Then, with a second whoosh, George has cried "the Burrow!" and vanishes too.
"Ron, you next," says Mr. Weasley.
"See you," says Ron brightly to the Dursleys. He grins broadly at Harry and me, then steps into the fire, shouts "the Burrow!" and disappears. Now Harry, Mr. Weasley, and I remain.
"Now you Jamie." He directs to me. Dudley makes an odd whimpering noise from behind his parents as he peeks around me to look at them. I glare at Harry since he's now snickering at me.
"I'll see you soon Harry, I'm just counting the seconds." I growl at my friend, smirking in triumph as his eyes widen worriedly. "The Burrow!" I say. My world spins out of focus until it comes back together in the living room of the Burrow.
Fred, George, Ron, and I sit on the couch staring at the fireplace waiting for Harry and Mr. Weasley to come back. "I can't believe you did that! I don't even think your Dad will protect you now." I tell them shaking my head.
"What's going on now?" Ron asks confusedly.
"Well we might have…" Fred starts.
"Slipped a few of our newest products to the floor in the living room there. Knew that the great blob of a boy wouldn't be able to resist the temptation of the false candy." George chuckles. I grin at the pair of them.
"Plus, that slimy blob is not good enough for our Lady Jamie. We saw the way that he was looking at you, and that's unacceptable!" Fred puts in again. My eyes widen at that information.
"Wait a minute! You're telling me that Dudley, the Dudley that makes Harry's life hell has— has a crush on me?" I cry. The twins give me duh looks and I jump up from my seat on the couch shaking from revulsion.
"Oh Merlin! That is so not okay! I feel dirty this is just wrong!" I cry. A shiver runs down my spine and I debate on whether or not I have enough time to run back upstairs and take another quick shower before Harry arrives. My decision is taken away from me though when new voices greet my ears.
Two new tall redheads are now in the kitchen. Fred and George grin from ear to ear and bound there. I follow behind them uncertainly. I watch as the twins hug the two men that I've never met before but have to be Weasleys. Suddenly the greetings break apart and all four of them turn to see me.
"Jamie let me introduce you to our slightly cooler, but still outrageously boring brothers Bill and Charlie." Fred and George declare. I wave at the pair of them uncertainly.
Well this is certainly going to be interesting.