Author's Note: Don't hate me too much for the long absence, I would make excuses about how much is going on in my life, but I won't bother. I couldn't get these characters out of my head, so I had to write something down – fingers crossed I'm back for good.
I had never attended a funeral before, but I couldn't help but feel as though my lumpy yellow cardigan was inappropriate in the sea of black. Although, it wasn't really a sea of black – more a small pond. Very few people tended to be charmed by Gran's personality.
Molly stood rooted to my side, not taking her eyes off the ground. The absence of her snarky comments shocked me more than anything else – she was the unsinkable Molly after all, but at the moment she looked as though she wanted to do nothing more but sink into the ground below her. I squeezed her hand in what I hoped to be a reassuring way, as I had never had to comfort my younger sister before.
From across the graveyard I met eyes with Seth, who had yet to remove his from me yet. There was a ghostly expression etched into his face, and I couldn't help but feel reminded of the unimaginable pain he must feel attending yet another funeral. He was keeping his distance, and I had the feeling as though he did not want to intrude on my pain, which I was almost glad for.
It was true, I had never got along well with my Gran, but even now, as she was lowered into the ground, I could not help but think of that constipated look she used to get when talking to me. I almost smiled. The thought which stung the most, however, was the fact that my absent parents were once again absent.
I remembered back to the uncomfortable phone call I had to make, to remind them that their children were stranded.
"What do you mean you won't come?" I had asked my mother desperately.
I heard her sigh from the other end of the phone, her breath broken by the crackle of bad reception. "It's not that we won't, it's that we can't."
"But she's your mother." I hissed quietly so my sister wouldn't hear. "And Molly and I are your children, in case you've forgotten."
"Of course I haven't." She said, sounding angry. "You'll join us a few days after the funeral – it's all arranged, we're booking your tickets tomorrow."
I reeled around, casting a quick glance into the lounge room, afraid Molly had heard my mother's statement, which she obviously couldn't, but her words had sent me into shock. Leave? I couldn't believe how irresponsible and irrational my mother was being, not even considering Molly and her education. How could she possibly believe uprooting a prepubescent girl from civilization and dragging her around from country to country was responsible parenting? Besides, the thought of leaving Seth, Seth who had been more reliable in the few days that I had known him than my mother had ever been in her entire life, was unbearable to think about.
"Oh, no we won't." I told her, my voice rising in a hysterical manner. "We've been fine without you all these years, we certainly don't need you now."
I heard my mother scoff on the other end of the phone. "You're legally an adult, so I can't force you to come, but Molly on the other hand-"
"Molly, who hardly knows you," I began, my voice venomous. "Will be staying here with me."
"She's my daughter!" She yelled from the other end of the line.
"Hardly." I had scoffed, slamming the phone down.
The conversation had left me furious, and my mind reeling, but as the reality of the situation had dawned on me I began to feel a sense of unease. To think I could support both Molly and I on a frozen-yogurt store salary was ridiculous and naïve, but I wouldn't allow my parents to take her away. It seemed worse than loosing my Gran.
After the service, Magus was the first person at my side. He was meant to leave for college a few days ago, but despite my protests he had stuck around to do the whole supportive best friend thing. I couldn't quite meet his eyes when he touched my shoulder lightly.
"Hey pal," He said softly. "How are you holding up?"
"As well as one can." I told him, eyes firmly focused on my shoes.
"I don't think I'll go to college this year." He told me nonchalantly, as though making conversation. "I can always just defer for a year."
I shot him an angry look. "Don't you dare, Magus. I will never forgive you or myself if you don't leave, you've been talking about going to New York for years."
"But some things are just more important." He told me helplessly, which was when I finally met his eyes – they were full of pity, but all I could see was the guilt.
I couldn't help but smile at him, despite his stupidity. Honestly, that boy.
"You are going to college and I am going to live vicariously through all your sexual escapades with cute boys." I told him, before looking in Seth's direction. "Besides, I've already found a new man to replace you, so you don't have to worry about that."
He returned my small smile, knowing that I was too much of a shrew to express that I would miss him without insulting him. It didn't feel like I was loosing him though, and despite my earlier wishes of wanting to curl up into his suitcase, I had reasons to stay. One of which was making his way over to me.
Magus glanced over his shoulder and spotted Seth, before giving me a grin. "My replacement is here to comfort you."
"Good," I told him, giving him a rare hug. "Because you're pretty terrible at it."
I felt his warmth instantly, despite the fact that he was still a meter away from me. The ghostly expression was gone, and instead replaced by one of incredible sadness. At first I thought it was because of his father, and all the memories a funeral must stir for him, but when he met my eyes all I could see was his concern for me. A kind of deep, loving concern that made my heart feel as though it had been clenched in a fist – nobody had ever looked at me that way. And when he enveloped me into a hug that was so different from the one Magus and I shared only moments ago, I pressed my head to his chest, listening to his heart pick up as I wrapped my arms around him. Just for the moment, while he was holding me, things seemed as though they were going to be okay.