Author's Note: Totally pumping this out. Please don't forget to leave a review; it is genuinely sad how much I look forward to them.
"Wine?" Leah said incredulously. "It's only midday – I think we'll get along well."
I watched her lug her singular bag across the threshold. She wore cut off shorts and a singlet, hair pulled back in a ponytail.
"Does Seth know you're here?" I asked as politely as I could.
"He left a voicemail." She shrugged. "My baby brother has imprinted, how could I not show up to enjoy the fun? Where is he, by the way?"
"He took my sister to Seattle for the day." I said.
"Of course he did." She said with a slight, knowing smile. "That's such a Seth thing to do."
I couldn't help but agree as I left to retrieve another wine glass. It was out of the way considerate, which I could only relate to Seth's flaw of being almost too nice. I considered calling him, to prepare him of the inevitable reunion, but decided not to on the account of him freaking out while around my sister.
I returned to find Leah completely at home, lounging back on a chair and asking if she could smoke inside. I was instantly reminded of Jude, and found it very unsurprising that they had been close friends.
"We were just discussing Ginger's feelings about the whole imprinting thing." Kim offered politely.
"Let me guess," Leah started. "You're confused, a little upset that he's decided his life revolves around you, but you're gong to stay with him regardless."
"How'd you know?" I muttered, staring into my wine glass.
"Because that's how everyone reacts." She said simply. "But you're in the rare position of bagging Seth, who is probably the purest human alive, and one of few people I truly love, which means I deserve a bit of input before you break his heart."
"I wasn't planning on it…" I protested.
"Just listen." She commanded. "Even without the whole imprinting thing, you could do a lot worse than Seth. I've known him longer than anybody, which gives me a bit of perspective. He's always been a bit naïve, he expects the best of people, even when they let him down – which is probably the only reason he tries to stay in contact with me. But now he has you, and you have to understand how important you are in his life. More than important – you are his life, and while that puts him in a vulnerable position, regardless of how much you like him, and I have to tell you that if you break his heart, I will break you."
There was an awkward moment of silence until Kim interjected. "Well, actually, she almost loves him."
"You might be making this worse, Kim." Emily said softly.
"It's not like it's my intention to hurt him," I said finally. "Seth has really been the only thing keeping me together recently."
"But it's not all about you." Leah cut in. "What about him?"
"Leah…" Emily murmured cautiously.
"No she's right," I said setting down my wine. "It isn't all about me, and I think since meeting Seth that has become much more apparent."
"That's what I like to hear." Leah said, draining an entire glass of wine. "Obviously he's drawn to you for a reason, and I don't have enough context to understand that. However, you should understand how much power you have over him."
"Power?" I asked, aghast. "I don't want power over him."
"And that's why you're his imprint." Kim said with a grin.
"Think about it – some girls would love to have complete control over a guy. Imagine being able to bend a guy to your will – he'd do anything you'd say without hesitation. There are so many girls who would use that maliciously, but because you don't means that you truly care about his own wishes." Emily explained.
"Of course I do." I said. "But I don't want to be the only thing that makes him happy."
"That's just something you'll have to come to terms with." Kim shrugged. "I mean, he'll still find happiness with his friends, his duty to protect the community, but when it comes down to it, you will always matter the most."
"But that's-" I struggled, attempting to find the right words.
"You have low self esteem." Leah said, finally interjecting. "That's why you can't comprehend someone feeling about you the way Seth does."
I stared at her in stunned silence, thinking of a million rebuttals to make her argument pointless, but unable to express them. She was right of course, I had only known her five minutes and she had read me like a book. I didn't think I deserved the unconditional devotion Seth had given me, which was why I was trying so furiously to deny it. I mean, I was a lumpy sack of laziness; awkward, unfashionable – I wore moth-eaten cardigans for Christ's sake. But there was Seth, who thought the world of me and I had no idea why.
"I suppose I'll get the other bottle." Kim said suddenly, rising from her sitting position.
"I'll help." Emily said, eyeing Leah and I.
"Look," Leah started quietly once they had left the room. "Sam and I were involved until he imprinted on Emily – I had never felt so low in my life. But I should tell you – low self-esteem will never get you anywhere. I resented myself for years; felt like I could never fit in with the pack, and it drove me to isolation. I have been moving around for years, trying to 'find myself' but it hasn't worked. I would kill to love someone the way Seth loves you, but it's not biologically possible."
"It's not?" I asked.
"I doubt Seth told you that I was the reason my father had a heart attack, but I was. When I transitioned it was too much for him to handle – I was the first female shape-shifter."
My mind whirled. "But you can't imprint?"
"No, from a biological perspective the reason we imprint is to pass along genes to those most compatible to continue the bloodline. However, because of the way transforming affects my body, I can't have children and therefore have no need for imprinting." She said it simply, but I noticed a far off look in her eye that suggested she hadn't entirely come to terms with it.
"That bothers you." Was all I could say.
Her eyes met mine and I recognized fear – fear of revealing too much. "It's why I left, apart from the whole Emily and Sam thing. Can you imagine being on the cusp of all that? I watched my pack, one by one, imprint on girls they'd dedicate themselves to and love the rest of their lives. It's better being lonely by yourself than surrounded by people."
Even though I'd only known Leah for a short period of time, I knew she'd resent pity, but that was all I could muster for her.
She poured herself the remaining dregs of the bottle before turning to me. "If you tell anybody I said that, I will kill you."
I nodded, thankful that Emily and Kim had chosen that moment to return.
We passed he remained of the afternoon discussing Seth, the whole shape-shifting thing, and what Leah had been doing the past couple of years. I learned that she had been waitressing, and although fired for her temper on multiple occasions, she was doing well in her standards. She couch surfed, scraped by, but in her words, as long as she had enough money for booze and cigarettes, she was happy. I considered her life in comparison to my own; although mine had completely turned in the past couple of months, there was always the reassurance that Seth provided me. And before him there was Magus; I had never considered being completely on my own like Leah was.
Even after the second bottle was gone, Kim and Emily lingered for hours. I felt as though, seeing as they knew Leah better than I did, they had come to the agreement that leaving us alone would eventually result in my slow, painful death. However, as the afternoon turned into evening, they eventually left – reassured that I wasn't going to have a breakdown over the whole Seth fiasco, and semi reassured that Leah wasn't going to be true to her word and kill me.
"I think I have more wine stashed underneath my bed?" I offered as a heavy silence loomed over the two of us.
"What, no vodka?" She asked. "It's not like it's midday anymore, vodka is perfectly acceptable at this time in the evening."
"You're forgetting that I am essentially still a child and have to get Seth to buy my liquor. Can you imagine him agreeing to buy me vodka?" I said, eyebrows raised.
"No problem." She said, pulling a flask from her bag. "I'm always prepared."
"Why am I not surprised?" I muttered.
It was then that I heard a commotion at the front door. I recognized Seth and Molly's voices immediately, predictably arguing about Seth's granny driving skills.
"I'm embarrassed people three times your age were overtaking us." I could hear Molly say.
"Sorry for not crashing the car and killing us both." Seth said, his voice growing closer to where Leah and I were sitting.
When they entered the room, Seth's eyes immediately met mine, tracing over my face as his lips turned upwards into a smile. After a moment they traveled across the table, taking in the smirking, lounging form of Leah. His mouth dropped open in shock.
"Don't I get a hug?" She asked, eyebrows raised.