March 6, 1992
Dear Diary,
I can't believe it's been a year since we bought the house, two years since our first date.
Deacon's been out of rehab for more than a year. I'm proud of how well he's done. I know he's slipped a few times, those nights out with Vince, or a few too many drinks at an after party, but he's still trying to stay sober and control his drinking. It bothers me that he's quit AA.
I'm completely and totally ecstatic and over the moon about a platinum album and our first headlining tour.
Deacon says he's happy as long as I am, but he just doesn't seem as enthusiastic about everything. I just hope this isn't all too much for him. He prefers his privacy and keeping things a little low key. I don't think low key is going to be possible for a while.
We did manage to have a nice anniversary dinner and long country drive tonight. It was so nice just being alone with Deacon.
I enjoyed my New York Birthday shopping spree with Tandy, but I missed and worried about Deacon all weekend. I was so happy to get home and find him keeping himself occupied with things around the house.
I know I should have more faith in him, but I worry. He's still having nightmares, but never wants to talk about them. I know they're about his childhood just from things he's mumbled in his sleep. My heart breaks for the little boy inside him, and what he must've gone through.
Earlier in the evening …
"Hey, How'd the big birthday shopping spree with your sister go?" Deacon asked, hearing the front door close, followed by a thud as Rayna dropped her suitcase and shopping bags
"Great! I just got off the phone with Bucky. We've gone platinum!" Rayna excitedly said as she looked in the bedroom for Deacon
"Deacon, where in the world are you?" she asked
"Down here."
"What are you doin, babe?" she laughed, finding his legs hanging out from under the kitchen sink
"Well, with you gone all weekend I thought it'd be a good time to work on my honey to do list." He said, sitting up, leaning against the cabinets
"You know you don't have to do this kinda stuff anymore. We can afford to hire a plumber." She laughed as she straddled him on the kitchen floor
"What if I wanna be the sexy plumber, here to take care of more than your pipes!" he smirked as she bent to kiss him
"Mmmmm…after a weekend away, you can take care of whatever you want, and you are very very sexy." She whispered provocatively nibbling his neck
"Somebody miss me?" he laughed
"I did. I missed everything about you. Your smile, your laugh, your kisses, you next to me in bed at night…everything… " she whispered intensifying the neck nibbles, driving him crazy
"Did you miss this? …..or this?….maybe this?…." He whispered back, slipping off her panties, unbuttoning her blouse, quickly whisking her into his arms, taking her to their bedroom
After two years together, Deacon was still the most handsome man she'd ever seen. They'd had their ups and downs, but she couldn't imagine a life with anyone else. He still drove her crazy in every way. Making love to him never got old. His looks only seemed to be getting better with age, and his voice still melted her heart, and made her forget everyone, and everything even after 2 years of performing together.
"I never want to leave this bed again!" she couldn't help but smile as they spent the afternoon making love
"Me either, Ray!" he smiled back as he gently kissed every inch of her body, taking extra time in her favorite spots, the ones only Deacon had ever touched, sending tingles up and down her spine
"That feels so good, babe. Never stop." She whispered breathily as he nibbled the inside of her thighs, moving back up slowly, until he had her in a deep passionate kiss, finally inserting himself after almost an hour of teasing her with foreplay
"Slower, Deacon…I could do this forever." She whispered savoring him after a weekend apart
"You really missed me, huh?" he smirked a little while later, her head on his bare chest as the afternoon sun began to set
"Every second I was gone, babe."
"That makes two of us. Hard to believe it's been two years today, huh?" he asked kissing the top of her head
"It's been an amazing ride, Deacon. I can't imagine taking it with anyone else. Happy Anniversary!"
"Happy Anniversary to you too, Ray! …and Happy 20th, baby!"
"We have so much to celebrate today. I was saying before we got distracted, Bucky called. The album has gone platinum! A million copies sold, Deacon!"
"Really?" he pulled back to look at Rayna
"I couldn't have done any of this without you, babe."
"Congratulations, baby! I never had any doubt. The first time I saw you sing at the Bluebird, I knew you were gonna make it big."
"We've made it, big, Deacon! I owe you everything. I love you more with each year together."
"Me too, Ray! Hey, I got somethin for you." He pulled a velvet box from the nightstand
"The bracelet, I wanted." She smiled as she pulled it from the box
"Yeah, I went back to the mall and got it the day after you said you wanted it. You are damned expensive, woman! …but worth every penny!" he laughed, kissing the inside of her wrist, another of her favorite spots as he helped her put the gold and diamond bracelet on
"You want yours now?" she asked
"Not if it means you're gettin outta this bed." He playfully held her tight
"C'mon…I can't wait to give this one to you." She laughed, pulling away from him
"I know the Martin your grandpa gave you means a lot, but I've seen you drool over this one a few times at Gruhn's. I stopped on my way home. The guy behind the counter said you've been visiting it a couple times a month." Rayna came back into the bedroom with a guitar case
"Rayna, you didn't have to do that. It's way too much." Deacon ran his hand over the smooth grain of the 1938 Martin
"You're worth it." She smiled as he pulled her in for a deep kiss
"How about a nice dinner out? I made a reservation at Morton's in the private room." He asked
"Anywhere with you would be great, babe."
"Maybe a country drive later in the old truck?" he asked with a smirk
"We haven't done that for a while. OK, but why don't we take my car?" She agreed
"More room in the truck." He argued his point as he got up to get dressed
"Yeah, but I don't really feel like gettin stuck in the country on a chilly night. When are you gonna go truck shopping? You keep sayin you want something new."
"I dunno, Ray. That old truck has sentimental value. Bought it in Natchez. It got me here. We've had some great times in it, huh?"
"We have, babe, but it's on its last leg. You're constantly havin to fix somethin on it. It breaks down at the worst times. You really need something more reliable." She made her points
"I'll let you in on a little secret. All those time you thought it broke down in the country. It didn't." he laughed
"What? You faked breakdowns for truck sex?" she stopped and stared as he laughed
"Maybe."
"You got me in trouble with daddy all those times for nothing?"
"I'd say it all worked out pretty good, huh?" he kissed the nape of her neck as he zipped her dress
"You're lucky you're so damn cute." She smiled pulling away from his neck kisses
"Oh what, are you seriously mad?" he laughed
"No, I loved those times together when we first met, but you could have just pulled over and asked. I wouldn't have refused, you know."
"I had to make sure you were captive, and all mine." He smirked as he led her out to the car
"I've been all yours since the day we met, Deacon."
"I know that, now. Back then I wasn't so sure. You never seemed to notice we stopped at about the same spot, hidden off the main road. It never occurred to you that it was the same place?" he asked still amused by his long kept secret
"It was dark! I can't believe you tricked me!"
"I had good intentions. I just wanted you all to myself, all alone in the middle of nowhere, for a little while. Still do. It's so crazy now with bein recognized everywhere, baby." He whispered as he helped her from the car and took the valet ticket
"The private room is ready for you Mr. Claybourne." The hostess said as they walked in
"Ya know before we had to reserve a private room just to have a quiet dinner out, or take security with us to walk down Broadway."
"I know. I miss that part of it too, babe. It won't always be so crazy."
"This is just the beginning, Ray. First platinum album and all. We've got years of craziness to come."
"Do you have any regrets, Deacon? Are you sure this is what you want?"
"I want you to be happy, Ray. This is what you've worked so hard for. I know you want this. So, yeah if it means I get to wake up next to a beautiful country star every mornin. I'm in for the long haul, baby."
"OK, you'd tell me if it's all too much, right?" she asked a little worried about him.