Disclaimer: Much to my annoyance I don't own The Rocky Horror Picture Show. If I did, a remake would never ever happen.
A/N: If you haven't already noticed, I've changed when the other chapters take place.
November, 1974
The first three weeks went quite nicely.
Nothing interesting happened. Frankie's 'Little Science Project' seemed to be taking up most of his and Riffraff's time. In fact, Eddie and I had even had some time alone.
Magenta would quietly leave the room when he showed up, sometimes.
"So, have ya been to a doctor yet?" he asked.
"Sort of. I went to a doctor when I thought I had the flu. That's how I found out," I explained.
He suddenly looked worried. "Babe, you've gotta go to a doctor."
"How would you know?"
"I almost had a little sibling. My ma… if she'd gone to a doctor it might not of died!"
This worried me. "Well, maybe you're right. But I don't have any form of ID or anything! When I left home in '72, my parents hadn't yet let me get a driver's license. And I don't have any money, since I stopped with the tap dance gigs in June! We rely on Fran- The Master for everything!"
"What about my Uncle Everett? He's rich as hell. And he lives nearby… I think."
And so, we decided to go to Eddie's uncle (Dr. Everett Scott) for help.
"I'll write a letter, and get Riffraff to send it for me, alright?"
"Alright."
It was then that Riffraff entered the room. "Eddie, he's… ready… for you."
An expression of sickened horror appeared on Eddie's face. He stood up and walked to the door the way a condemned man might walk to the gallows.
"Ready for what?" I asked, very worried.
"I'll explain later, babe," Eddie said quietly.
As he left the room I began to cry. Something was very wrong… I knew it!
A moment later Magenta came in, finding me sobbing hysterically.
With a sigh, she kneeled in front of me. "Stop it right now. We've got a convention tonight, and you're supposed to be performing. We need to get you dressed."
I managed to get myself under control. After wiping tears and smeared makeup off my face, she helped me apply my makeup.
"There. Now, put on that cheerful glittery corset. And the top hat with the matching tailcoat. Oh, and your tap shoes!"
Soon enough I wore my entire costume.
Thanks to my increasingly noticeable 'baby bump', I couldn't wear my corset as tightly as I used to. Magenta had to pin straps to it to keep it from falling off. It made me look fat, much to my annoyance.
"You are fat," she replied when I mentioned this. "You're supposed to be."
I rolled my eyes at her blunt honesty.
Something about my bright, glittery outfit cheered my up. I smiled at my reflection. For the first time in a while I felt like my old self. Probably because I'd mostly worn my drab grey pajamas for much of the last four months.
Somewhere nearby a clock chimed. It was 10 PM.
"The Unconventional Conventionalists will be here soon. We've got to go downstairs," Magenta said with a sigh.
"Okay!" I squealed, spinning around.
I was in a far too cheerful mood. As we got on the elevator my feet danced without my brain's permission. Everything seemed wonderful all of a sudden.
"Come on, Columbia."
Apparently I'd been so caught up in my mind that I hadn't noticed that we'd reached the ground floor. Magenta stood nearby looking quite amused.
I tapped my way into the ballroom. None of the conventionalists had arrived yet. In fact, Riffraff was still hanging up some of the decorations.
"Hey, Riff!" I squeaked, spinning.
He raised an eyebrow. "Hello…"
Grinning cheerfully I sat down on top of the broken pinball machine that inexplicitly takes up a corner of the room. That's one of the random 'earthling things' they've collected over the years.
"So… why so cheerful…?" he asked.
"Dunno. Guess its because I'm dressed like my old self… so I feel like my old self!"
That didn't really make sense, but I didn't care.
Then Magenta entered the room. She wore her maid outfit now. Smiling wildly, she walked over to where her brother stood.
"Hello… darling sister…" he whispered.
"Hello, beloved brother," she replied.
As they did their weird 'elbow sex'/secret handshake thing, I wished I had a lover of some kind that I was that devoted to- and that was that devoted to me. And then I remembered Eddie. How could I have forgotten him?
Whatever.
It didn't matter right now. I'd be having our kid in five months, and everything would be perfect!
Soon enough, Unconventional Conventionalists began to arrive on their bizarrely identical motorbikes. All of them wore very similar outfits. I smiled cheerfully and waved at them all.
I didn't tap dance, however.
No, I wouldn't do my tap dance until the 12 o'clock Time Warp. That's when the fun begins. Just before Frank reveals his 'Little Science Project' to everyone.
Weirdly, just before the clock struck 12, I faintly heard a knock at the front door and two unfamiliar voices.
Just as the Time Warp began, two ordinary earthlings entered the room. With Magenta and Riffraff... Ooh, the girl kept fainting. Poor darling.
Wait. Ordinary earthlings?
Maybe they could help me escape! When I was supposed to sing about how I loved Frankie, I instead sang about how he'd kidnapped me. They didn't seem to notice. Whatever.
Soon, it was time for my tap dance solo.
Oh, it felt so wonderful to dance again! God, it felt like-
As I was about to dance the dance's climax I felt the baby kick. Oh my god... that hurt! The baby hadn't ever...
Nearly to late I realized the shock had thrown me off balance. I shrieked... and Magenta caught me.
"Don't try that again, Columbia," she hissed.
"Sorry," I muttered.
We rejoined the others and finished the dance. As we all fell to the floor Magenta fell beneath me. Probably intentionally (so I didn't get hurt).
My attention was suddenly on the two earthlings, when the man said: "Uh, anybody know how to Madison...?"
I giggled. Around me, other conventionalists began to mutter in amusement. Then I heard his music begin to play. Miss Prude and Mr Prude were backing up toward the elevator. To where a certain sweet transvestite was.
Miss Prude shrieked in terror and fainted. Again.
"How do you do? See you've met my... faithful handyman!"
So began the song of an ex-lover and savior of mine. Though I hated him, I also loved him for rescuing me from a groupie's horrible life. And didn't he look sexy in that corset. My sweet transvestite all dressed up!
He began talking about a man with blonde hair and a tan. Sounded very strange.
Now he appeared to be inviting them upstairs to the lab. That's when I learned their names were 'Brad Majors' and 'Janet Weiss'.
"I see you shiver with antici..." he began.
I waited tensely for him to finish that sentence.
"...pation."
A delightful shiver ran down my spine.
Then Magenta tapped me on the shoulder. "Columbia! Time to undress our guests."
With a giggle I helped her lead Miss and Mr. Prude into another room. There, Magenta took his coat and Riffraff took her coat. And then the proper undressing began.
Miss Prude squeaked in terror as Riffraff calmly stripped her down to her underclothes. I must admit that, if they weren't plain white, I would consider them rather 'pinup'. Still, that lace-edged bra really did show off her breasts. Though her cleavage wasn't as impressive as Magenta's, it still was quite nice to look at.
And then I looked at Mr. Prude. Ooh, look at his... My, my, my...
"Slowly! Slowly! To nice a job to rush!" I squealed, giggling.
Then, I threw their clothes on the floor.
Before they could properly object to this, Magenta and Riffraff led them to the elevator. I quickly followed.
"Er, is... um, he your husband?" Miss Prude asked.
"We are simply his... servants," Riffraff replied unhappily.
I giggled. Again.
When we reached the lab, Frankie greeted the two guests cordially. They both seemed very uncomfortable. Mr. Prude started shouting about a phone but quickly shut up.
"Asshole," Magenta muttered.
I giggled weirdly.
For some reason I began to feel dizzy. With a sigh, I collapsed in the corner of the room.
As I sat there feeling quite ill, I overheard Riffraff quietly explain that I was ill with an earthling disease that Rocky Horror might catch if I'm too near him. I felt to terrible to ask who Mr. Horror was. After a moment Miss Prude walked over to where I sat.
"Poor dear, you look terrible! Do you need a doctor of some kind?" she asked.
Now I kinda respected her.
"No, not right now... later," I whispered.
At that point I'd begun to suspect it was merely just sickness-which-doesn't-happen-in-the-morning-contrary-to-popular-belief. Janet went back to standing next to her boyfriend (I think that's who he was).
Frankie made a very impressive (and very dramatic) speech about finding the secret of creating life. It made sense, since he didn't seem to understand why Magenta always took "those silly pills" after she'd screwed her brother. What I heard of his glorious speech didn't seem to have anything to do with that, though. Oh well.
Lots of people clapped afterwards. That had woken me up (to my annoyance), since I'd fallen asleep out of sheer boredom.
Then I realized that I'd misheard the entire speech.
Apparently he'd magically made a weird tan guy magically appear in a tank. And that's who the person called 'Rocky Horror' was. The tan guy did many strange things involving body building. I had no damn clue what was going on.
Just as I was falling asleep a very familiar person rode out of the freezer on a motorbike!
"Eddie!" I screamed running over to him.
Then, he began to sing a song about loving rock n' roll. I didn't care what the song was about at all.
"Eddie! The baby kicked!" I shouted, not caring if Frank heard.
He kissed me with bizarre passion. After a strange saxophone solo, he picked me up in his arms and kissed me over and over. With my arms around his neck with both fell to the floor (with me on top of him).
Somehow I didn't care how pissed off Frank probably was that Eddie and I were dry humping each other half to death on the floor.
Out of the corner of my eye I noticed the conventionalists singing and doing this weird chorus line.
Suddenly I heard someone scream "NOOOO!"
Both Eddie and I sat up to see Riffraff hacking Frank to death. Everyone else had frozen in place. Miss Weiss' face was buried in Mr. Majors' shoulder and she was sobbing.
Then, I fainted in insane shock.
The last thing I remember was Eddie's arms around me.
A/N: And so the movie's plot changes! I hope it isn't too strange.
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