Long time no see, right? I apologize for my unplanned hiatus. A lot of rl happened and made it difficult for me to find the inspiration or will to write. I'm not entirely sure if I've broken out of that funk or if this is another one off, "hey I can write again for today" type of thing. But I do promise that even if it takes longer than any of us like, I have every intention of completing this story. This is one of my favorites even if I don't really watch Vikings anymore, so it's really not going to go anywhere. Just hang in there, I promise we'll get there.

Also, I wanted to thank everyone for the support. I know I've ranted in my notes before about certain things that get on my nerves, but honestly, you guys are the best. Anytime I see a review or and fave or a follow it makes me smile. Thank you for everything guys, seriously. Without you it would be a lot harder to get back into this story.

Anyway, this chapter is on the shorter side of average for me, but I figured after such a long wait you guys deserved something here it is.

"You are doing very well," Lifa smiled at her student a little weakly. It had been a little over a week since their first lesson, a week of languages and customs and getting to understand each other better. A week of completely avoiding Rollo. She was honestly surprised by how easy it had been. Rollo's presence was so large in her mind, so unavoidable, so insurmountable, it seemed impossible not to be near him or feel him close by. Somehow, however, in the past week she had only glances of him to assure her he hadn't run off on his own to live in the wild. Not that she thought he would. That was the most ridiculous conclusion to an argument she could think of, something only her brother would follow through on.

She sighed and shook her head, drawing her thoughts back into the present as she watched Temperance make simple conversation with the blacksmith's wife, requiring little guidance on pronunciation and translation. Once they realized the Englishwoman was learning their culture, the townspeople had begun to warm up to her slowly, aided by her ability to learn so quickly. Already Lifa was hardly needed for more than moral support. Still, the blonde chose to spend her days with her new friend. It made it feel less like avoiding others and more like assisting her fellow female.

Honestly, she wasn't even sure anymore if she wanted to avoid Rollo. Her anger had subsided faster than normal, her memories of how he had taken care of her after her confessions softening her to the point that she was more annoyed with herself than anyone. Still, she could not stand the thought of him having told their brothers her secret. Even if he hadn't really, he had implied to them that something had happened to her, and she hadn't had a moment's peace since. From their words she knew he hadn't breathed a word of what actually happened, but the ease he had begun to instill in her with his understanding and acceptance had vanished under the heavy gazes of her brothers.

"Lifa?" Temperance's unsure voice caught her attention before the slender hand on her arm did. "Are you alright?"

"Yes," Lifa scrubbed a hand down her face in pure frustration of her wandering mind, "I'm fine. Just tired I think."

The brunette tilted her head in thought, light brown eyes alight with concern, "Perhaps you should go home and rest then. I'll return to the longhouse."

Lifa raised an eyebrow. Temperance may have felt more comfortable now amongst the people, but being alone with Ragnar or anywhere within the same building as their brothers still made her nervous. That she was willing to go to the longhouse on her own spoke volumes of Lifa's disheveled mental state.

"Are you sure?"

"I'll be fine," Temperance squeezed her arm lightly in comfort. "You've seemed more reluctant to be there than I these past week. Ever since your argument."

Blue eyes widened slightly in astonishment. It still amazed her how observant Temperance was. She wasn't used to being around women, except for her sister-in-law, so to have a friend who could read her so well was a new and relieving feeling. She'd thought briefly on telling Temperance about her whole ordeal, but refused to add more nightmare fuel to the already turbulent mind.

"It's alright," Temperance continued. "You don't have to tell me about it."

Lifa took a deep breath, "Rollo discussed with our brothers some private information I wasn't willing to share yet. It's caused a bit of a disagreement between us is all. Everything's fine."

Again those brown eyes seemed to see right through her, "Is it?"

Lifa smiled slightly, finding it difficult to lie to this woman, "No. But I have faith it will be."

"How can it if you continue to avoid them?"

She chuckled, "Says the woman trying to send me home."

Temperance smiled back at her, "You said you were tired. Besides, didn't you say you were close to your brother and sister? Shouldn't they know whatever you're going through? They could help."

She shook her head, "It's not that simple."

"Why not?"

"You've seen my people, the way we live," she waved a hand around at the town moving around them, people ignoring the English words now that they'd grown used to hearing it. "What do you see when you look at us?"

Temperance took a moment to look around her, at the people shopping the market, slaves working on everyday chores, children playing in the street, animals causing a racket and forcing people to nearly shout to be heard at times. "I see good, strong people who work hard and love each other greatly."

Lifa nodded, smiling at how far they'd come in such a short amount of time, "Strong. Yes, we are strong. We're known for our strength. My entire life has been living up to that strength so as not to be left behind by my brothers. I refused to be seen as a useless female. But, what I am hiding from them…it would prove me false. Would validate the men who said I could not become a shieldmaiden because of my size. Who said I would be crushed in battle."

"Not to your brothers," Temperance shook her head, so sure of her words. "You've proven yourself to them. I've seen how much they care for you. They would never shun you, or whatever else you fear right now. They could never think less of you. They love you too much."

Lifa squeezed her eyes shut to keep the tears at bay. She hadn't realized how badly she needed to hear those words until they were spoken. She struggled to keep her composure as she formed words, "And when did you become so wise?"

The other woman chuckled lightly and shrugged, "I have no idea."

They both laughed for a moment, both feeling lighter and less burdened then they had in a long time.

She felt like a child as she lay on her bed, listening to the gentle humming and clinking of pots and pans as her sister-in-law threw together a small dinner for the two of them. Her brother had decided to dine out when it was clear Lifa, though not glaring any longer, would still not reveal what she was hiding. The sad puppy look he sent her before disappearing out the door almost broke her. She never liked seeing her brother upset, and being the one to hurt him was almost physically painful. But she knew she wasn't ready to speak with him yet, even if her conversation with Temperance made her see that perhaps she was not looking at the situation correctly. She realized now that she had to tell them. At some point. Later. Not now though. Not when she still felt a little too exposed from the earlier conversation.

Helga, though. Helga had always been like an older sister to Lifa, very nearly a second mother. Even as children, Lifa had liked Helga a great deal, following the older girl around when her brothers chased her away, having enough of her bothering them. The older girl would stand up for her, even going to far as to slap her brother and scream at him for at least an hour for teasing Lifa when she had her first bleeding. Her brother later told her that was when he fell in love with Helga, when it became clear she already saw Lifa as a little sister.

Helga would listen to what happened, would understand, wouldn't shun her. Lifa repeated the words like a mantra in her head as she stared at the flickering shadows on the wall of her brother's home.

"Lifa?" Helga called her, breaking her out of her silent worry. "Dinner's ready if you'd like some."

Lifa inhaled deeply, bolstering her courage as if readying for battle. In a way she was. She'd never felt so ready to fight in her life.

I know I suck ending it there, but I figured we've been over what happened to Lifa enough, and we're gonna have to go over it a million times more as the story progresses, so I'll leave it there and we can all assume the talk went exactly how you'd imagine it would. Okay? Okay.