Old Wounds and New Love Chapter 7: To Hope and to Wait, a gods eater burst fanfic

Another chapter! I promise there'll be fluffy romance this time. And a bit of sap. Correct that, a lot of sappy, OOC Soma.

Well, I got an interesting review from chapter 3 some time ago, from Rhyss. Thank you Rhyss for reminding me to make a story of my own writing characteristic. I know I emulated some chapters from other authors as I mentioned because those fics are damn good but they are not one fic, so I make this fic as an ultimate form of romance and fluffyness of SomaXFemMC love, which I hope you all hopeless romantic enjoy. Those fics are just for reference of this story's theme and opening. I mean, like, have you ever heard drama cd or otome game where those men smooches you and being lovey dovey? I wanna Soma to be like thaaat~~ (which, in reality, is 99.9% impossible), thus this fic happened.

And about the review from , well…. My bad if it looks too generic for you, but unfortunately, that's what I'm aiming for (some spoilers, tee hee). The fic I dream of is just a fic with a little bit action, bits of tragedy, and lots 'n lots of love (pardon, I'm really a hopeless romantic at heart). I just wanna make a happy fic (duh, it is God Eater, it won't be all happy and sunny like shoujo manga, so this is the 'happiest' I can do).

And pardon the late update. I've been mapping around Middle Java, and yes, that means I've been going in and out of woods and villages. God knows what happens to my motorbike now…

Well, enough of my blabbering for now. Enjoy!

To Hope and to Wait

Dark.

Everything was black. No, that wasn't it… If you know it was black, then you knew what you were facing, knew that you were seeing. But this? No, this wasn't seeing. She wasn't seeing anything at all so the best way to describe her current condition was… nothingness, oblivion. It felt terrible. It was like she was all alone, cold, and abandoned. She desperately looked for comfort, safety, solace. It felt like eternity before finally, a warm feeling enveloped her and something, more likely someone, offered her a piece of salvation, which she took without second thought.

That warm hand felt familiar. It soothed her and washed away all her worries. That hand guided her to someplace where she could hear people talking to each other.

"How's she Sakuya? She'll… make it, right?" asked a girly voice. Her voice didn't cover her worries at all, but it tried not to tremble.

"Don't worry, Alisa! She'll make it, just like every time!" a cheerful voice of a young man tried to comfort the first one, though clearly he too felt the same. "She'll be up in no time and then we'll watch Bugarally together again."

"She passed her critical condition, but with her current condition, I… I… don't know when she'll wake up…" The mature womanly voice started to cry.

Another deep manly voice calmed her. "C'mon Sakuya, don't ruin your pretty face like that. I bet she'll be sad if they see you all right now. Have faith in her. She won't abandon her unit. Not when she's the leader."

Those voices made her happy, yet woesome inside. She knew they were important to her, but going back to them meant going back to something else even more saddening and she loathed that. With that in mind, she went deeper and deeper into the darkness.

Why won't you go to where they are?

A gentle, well-known voice spoke to her. This… voice… it brought her something she lost. Oh, how she had been longing for this voice… She stood up and searched for the voice, yet all she sensed around was the absence of everything. Was this thing she longed for had a name? She knew it had, but what? She couldn't recall anything, even her own name.

"Where are you?"

Me? I'm somewhere where you can't reach. Somewhere you don't belong in.

No, no, this couldn't be happening. All this time she mourn and weep, hoping Gods above could bring him back, but all this time too he had been away from her, out of her reach. "Please, please, take me with you! I beg you! I-I'm lost without you…"

Now, now, don't say that… You have your friends to guide you. You're not lost without me.

"B-but," she stuttered. "I- I need you! I'm nothing without you! You taught me the joys on this hellish earth! You gave me strength!"

Please, Riitsu. Riitsu. That was it. Riitsu was her name. The moment he called her name with his peaceful voice, everything about him came back to her. How he made her smile, how he made the simplest things the fullest, how fought with her, and how he gave up his soul to save her and their friend. Don't try to go to where I am…

"Ren!" Yes… His name was Ren. Saying his name alone brought back fond nostalgia feelings. "Ren, please! Come back to me!"

Your time here is up now. Go, go back where you belong.As her beloved said it, her body was pushed away from the darkness into somewhere else. Her hand still tried to reach something or anything that could keep her near her precious one. But alas, it was all end in vain.

"Ren! Reen! I love you! I love you, Ren, so come with me!"

Until we meet again, my dearest.

"Reen! No, I want to be with you! I love you, Ren! I love you with all my heart!"

I love you, Riitsu. I love you, too.

…

And there, she lost it again, someone most important to her. It felt like years after she finally confessed her feelings, but at the same time, it only felt like seconds had passed. After their parting, she felt like being sucked into another place but where she was now was the same as before… All dark… But, wait… It was dark, but the nothingness was replaced with something else. It felt warm all over her body. This warmness wasn't anything like the mysterious one before. This one came from someone… but who?

"Hey. I come to visit you again," said a deep husky voice of a young man. His voice was trembling, but he miserably tried to hide it. "I-uh… I heard you call him again in your sleep, so… you must really do like him. That lucky bastard. He had your heart when people can't even see him and now he still have your heart when he isn't even around anymore. … … Damn, another mission. That's it for today I guess. Things've been chaotic without you around, so come back soon and give us a hand, okay? Hope that recklessness of yours will be cured along with those burns by then."

…

Seemed like a few days had past. Riitsu was still lingering around in the darkness without any clue of where she should go next so she would just wait there, right in the middle of darkness, waiting for another clue to come to her, but mostly hoping that Ren would be the one who come to her. Much to her entertainment, the young man from yesterday came again and once more, a warm feeling enfolded her.

"Damn, not waking up yet? Aren't you tired of sleeping all the time? Then again, I guess with all those burns it'll be nice to sleep it off." He chuckled. His voice today sounded chirpy that it somehow started to be creepy. "But old man Sakaki really knew what he was doing. Even the burns on your face started to regenerate itself completely without any scars. I wonder what kind of concoction he injects you everyday… But I… Uh, um- I think you're pretty no matter how you look. Tch. Dammit! Why am I even feeling embarrassed?! It's not like she can even hear this! Ugh… I need some fucking beers."

…

That young man spoke again. Why was his voice keep coming all the time. Where were that girl and the woman's voice? Or that cheerful boy and that man?

"Hey… How're you feeling? If you're feeling alright, you can wake up anytime now. We're waiting. We're all waiting for you. Oh yeah, everyone send you their regards. Alisa and Kota learned to make a cake so when you wake up, you'll taste the most horrible cake ever made on earth. Sakuya and Lindow are doing fine, same old, but I bet they'll be happier if you wake up. Other units wish you the best too, even old man Sakaki and Tsubaki. Heh, I bet Shio up there too."

After saying that, his voice became little sobs and the sobs got further and further away.

…

"Hey. How're you? Still the same, huh? You remember the rumor about us? Rumor about us got together and what not because of your stupid habit of sleeping anytime anywhere? I was remembering that, but it got me thinking… how nice it would be if we actually got together, but I knew your heart was someone else's, so I asked Lindow of what happened. I knew Ren from him. And I guess… I got jealous. I hated him because he was just a ghost, yet you love him. Are… are you still mad at me for insulting Ren?"

After hearing no answers he expected, the young man broke down. His voice was no longer arrogant or prideful as she remembered. His voice became the voice of a lonely friend, a guilty comrade, and a heartbroken lover.

"M-my bad…," he cried but no tears to be found, only sounds of sobbing. The young man was devastated, broken all the way to the core. "I just… I don't want to lose you to him, and look at you now. I lost you because of my own weakness. I failed to protect you. My jealousy seeled me and now I may never get the chance to apologize to you.

"So, please… Come back to us, come back to me! I'll become a better man and this time, whether I have you or not, I'll treasure you, I'll protect you! So… Please… Wake up…"

His words actually brought a pang of indescribable pain in Riitsu's heart. This young man wasn't supposed to be like this, and here he was, weeping and sobbing like a little boy waiting for his mom to pick him up in the rain, all just because of her. He really made her want to go back, but she was still afraid. The girl was afraid of a world without her beloved, she was afraid she'd get lost like before again.

"Please, Riitsu… Wake up… Please… I-I… I …"

With his plea, the mysterious force that pulled her from before came back. It was taking her somewhere again. This time, the force wasn't strong enough so she still could hang on wherever she was.

"Please… I.. I-I love…"

Again, it was pulling her. This time the force was two-fold stronger. She started to lose her grip and footing, slowly being swept along with the force.

" I… I love you, Riitsu."

The Den, Nightfall

As usual, Soma came into the Sick bay, paying his daily visit to his bed-ridden female leader. As usual, he checked the monitor that showed her vital signs. Nothing was wrong, so that was good. As usual, he checked her burn scars that were visible to him. The scars were regenerating nicely, thanks to Dr. Sakaki personal treatment. As usual, he checked around her bed to see if something dirty or dangerous were near her. No such things existed, good. With all seemed to be in order, it was about time for him to gave her his daily report, but this time he preferred to reminiscing about the past a little.

She stayed still, as silent as a corpse. If it wasn't for her constant breathing movement or the sound for her heart rate over the machine, he would've gone crazy already, but with her like this for almost a month, it was enough to make him mad. Fortunately the warmth of her hand as he held it every time he came calmed him a bit. It was a definite proof that she was still alive.

"M-my bad…," Soma cried but his tears were drained already many days ago, from the first days when his leader refused to wake up from her long slumber. His broad tan hands kept on holding hers, careful not to grip it too tight. "I just… I don't want to lose you to him, and look at you now. I lost you because of my own weakness. I failed to protect you. My jealousy seeled me and now I maybe never get the chance to apologize to you.

"So, please… Come back to us, come back to me! I'll become a better man and this time, whether I have you or not, I'll treasure you, I'll protect you! So… Please… Wake up…"

Soma was busy pleading with his dear life that he didn't realize the reading on her heartbeat changed. It became a little faster now, but still normal.

"Please, Riitsu… Wake up… Please… I-I… I …"

Her fingers twitched.

"Please… I.. I-I love…"

This time, her eyelid twitched.

"I… I love you, Riitsu."

And she opened her eyes. The sick bay's lighting was too much for her that all seemed blurry. The next thing she noticed were the warm hands that covered her own and silent sobbing from someone next to her. Though blurry, she knew that figure, especially that blue hoodie. She would recognize it everywhere. That hoodie was her important friend's trademark. Who was his name again?

"So…. ma…?"

Whooo a nice cliffy! Is that even considered as a cliffy? I dunno, seems so to me… In the end there aren't any fluff in this chapter huh? My bad. It came out differently from what I imagined it would be in my brain.

OK! Onto the next chapter!