A/N: There's nothing worse than being able to see a scene in your head, and not being sure if you can properly translate it into words. I hope that I've been able to do that with this chapter. Please let me know what you think.

Chapter Three

"Don't even joke about leaving." Rory smiled, noticing how the nervous fluttering in her stomach had disappeared completely.

"Still addicted to the almighty coffee bean?" He asked, as he opened his cabinet and pulled out a bag of coffee.

"It's not an addiction. I can stop whenever I want. I just don't want to." She was amazed at how easily they had fallen back into their natural rhythm.

"Right, and how about Lorelai? Has Luke forced her to quit yet?"

"No. That hasn't stopped him from trying though. But seriously, no one forces my mom to do something she doesn't want to do." She watched as he finished making the coffee, and grabbed the coffee cups from the cabinet.

"Speaking of Lorelai, how did you manage to get out of Christmas in Stars Hollow? And does Taylor know that he'll have to find someone else to play the Christmas angel?" He sat down at the small bistro table, across from her.

"Stop it." She laughed. "I only did that once. I don't get to visit as much as I'd like, work and all. She isn't happy about it, but she's okay with it."

"So, she has no idea that you're here."

"Not exactly, no." She confessed. "To be fair, I didn't even know that I was going to be here until very, very early this morning."

"Huh."

"What's that supposed to mean? You know I hate when you do that."

"So, this was completely spontaneous? That doesn't sound like you. Are you sure you didn't make a list of pros and cons?"

"No. I'd been dreading going home for the past couple weeks. The last time I was there was for my grandfather's funeral. I just don't want to be sad, sitting around that large table without him, trying to pretend that everything is fine when it isn't fine."

"I heard about your grandfather. I know how much you loved him. I'm sorry."

"Thank you. I think he would have liked you, even back then."

"Nice of you to say, but I don't think so." Jess nodded, knowing that there was no way that Richard Gilmore would have approved of him.

"Well, he loved me and I," She hesitated for a moment. "I liked you, so he would have liked you through association. So, Truncheon is doing really well?" She asked, changing the subject.

"It is. We outgrew this place, and you know I think this old house is kinda like my muse. I've written two books here. Seemed wrong to put it on the market."

"Are you happy, Jess?" Rory's expression changed as their conversation took a more serious tone.

"Well that's a loaded question, isn't it? Define happy." He deflected. "You?"

Moments passed, as Rory reflected on her own question. "I don't know. I just wanted so much more..." Her voice quivered ever so slightly, as she quickly wiped away the tears that brimmed her eyes. "I just remember wanting it all. Geez, we were kids, Jess. If I had known then..."

"I get it." He reached across the table and took her hand, watching the way that their fingers met, rather than making eye contact. "There's a reason I don't celebrate birthdays, you know. There's something about marking the passing of another year, and not being any closer to whatever it is you want. If you weren't here right now, I'd still be upstairs sleeping through it."

"It's so funny how people change. I mean, you could have exactly what it is that you think you've always wanted, everything right in front of you, but it means nothing." She rolls her eyes back to fight back the tears.

Jess understood all to well the empty feeling she was speaking of, but he didn't know how to respond. He knew she wasn't ready to hear his thoughts on the topic.

"Oh god, I didn't come here to do this. Not on your birthday. I'm sorry." She jumped up from the table and headed back towards the living room. It reminded him of the last time she visited Philadelphia.

He called after her, as he sprinted towards the door.

"I guess I've just been thinking a little too much about the past. The book..." She glanced over at it still sitting on the counter, as she paced from one end of the room to the other, arms flailing. "And it's your birthday, and I just show up. Who does that? I mean, I should have called. Maybe you don't want to hang around me all day." He remembered her rambling and how she found it difficult to stop once it started.

"It's been such a long time," She continued. "And we've hurt each other so much. I don't even deserve to be standing here with you. For all I know you might be seeing someone. Someone you'd rather be with." He stopped short of embracing her, grabbing her arms at the elbows and holding her there firmly.

"Rory, stop!" He took a deep breath and lowered his voice to nearly a whisper. "Stop." He felt her breathing return to normal, as he wrapped his arms around her. "There's no one else I'd rather be with."

The minutes passed, neither one wanting to be the one to pull away first. "This is a first for us." She pointed out. "Holding onto each other instead of running away."

For once in his life, he didn't have a witty comeback. He just held her tighter, clinging to her as if his very life depended upon holding onto this girl.