Chapter Five

My arm was still stiff and sore, but I bit down and concentrated, not thinking about the pain as Rollo put me through my paces. This was only my second practice session and I knew it would get worse before it got better. It would take time and patience before I was back to a suitable fighting condition. I let out a grunt each time our swords collided. He wasn't taking it easy on me and I appreciated that, but the pain was beginning to piss me off. I began to meet his blade with more force.

"Easy, there." He said, seeing the effort it was causing me. I ignored him as I pressed forward, forcing him back and dodging his attempts to strike me. He gave way and smiled, letting me exert all the energy I wanted. I heard the beat of hooves approaching over the loud clang of our blades meeting. I paused mid swing at the sight of soldiers approaching, a lot of soldiers. I swore as the flat of Rollo's blade made contact with my shoulder. He laughed and barely budged as I shoved him with my good arm, which wasn't my strong arm, but he was such a mountain that I didn't think it would matter much which arm I used.

"Soldiers." I motioned towards the advancing column.

"Ragnar" He called out, the smile instantly vanishing from his face as he turned towards the cabin.

"Wait!" I reached out and grabbed his arm, as I squinted into the distance. I caught the unmistakable shine of the the sun reflecting off a head full of long golden hair. I could feel her energy pulsing, calling out to me across the distance. Her strong, sure, loving, tender, soul was as familiar to me as my own.

"It's Lagertha!" I wouldn't have been able to hide my excitement if I'd wanted to. I squeezed his arm and couldn't stop myself from jumping up and down. He laughed and caught me mid jump.

"What are you waiting for?" I had neither the time nor the inclination to contemplate the look in his eyes as he gazed down at me. I needed no more encouragement than that. Turning on my heels, I took off running towards the approaching party. My shoulder screamed as I pumped my arms faster and faster, but it hardly even registered.

"YLVA!" My sister's voice seemed to fill the open field as she kicked her horse into a gallop.

"LAGERTHA" I ran faster as she quickly approached, jumping from her horse while it was still at full gallop and landing on her feet to run the rest of the way into my arms. I was the younger sister but I'd always been taller than her by nearly a head, so I picked her up and twirled her around like I used to do when we were children.

"My sister, my baby sister." Her voice cracked and I couldn't hold my tears back any longer.

"Oh, Lagertha. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to be gone for so long." My throat burned, making it hard for me to speak.

"I thought I'd never see you again." She pulled back and held me at arm's length. "Don't you ever do that to me, Ylva, never again." She shook my shoulders and I howled in pain.

"Easy there, she's injured." Ragnar stood back, looking not at Lagertha, but past her at the tall, muscular boy that stood behind her. This had to be Bjorn, he was an impressive mixture of all of us, his fathers features, his mothers hair, Rollo's stature, and my eyes. I wouldn't wish any of our personalities on the boy though. Hopefully he'd be better than all of us, smarter, and not so prone to give into temptations and rash decisions. Lagertha and I stood to the side so that Ragnar and Bjorn could have a proper reunion. The love between the father and son was so strong, I could actually see the air vibrating around them, it was beautiful.

I was always jealous of my sister when we were younger. She was older, smarter, prettier. She could fight better than any of us and her ferocity could be terrifying at times. It wasn't hard for me to see why Rollo loved her, nearly all of the boys in the village loved her. It wasn't just because of her beauty, brawn, or brains, and believe me she had all three, but it was her kind heart that endeared her to so many. I loved her, I looked up to her, I tried so hard to be like her, but I always failed.

I opened my eyes to find my sisters face less than an inch from mine. Her crystal blue eyes were stormy and I wondered briefly who'd pissed her off so early in the morning.

"What are you doing?" My voice was dry from sleep. She tilted her head to the side, looking at me quizzically before punching me right in the face. The salty taste of blood filled my mouth and my head began to pound from bouncing off the stone wall.

"That is my question for you, sister." She climbed on top of me and and grabbed the collar of my shirt, lifting me up slightly. "What are you doing?" She asked, her nose early touching mine.

"Get off me." I tried swinging at her but she pinned my arms down.

"Is it true?" Her face was as hard as stone. "Tell me, Ylva. Did you sleep with Rollo?" I took a deep breath and stopped struggling.

"Did Ragnar tell you this?" It had to have been him, no one else knows.

"Is it true?" The words hissed through her teeth and I knew I was about to cop it.

"Yes, it's true." I averted my eyes, not wanting to see the accusation in her gaze.

"Nessa is my best friend in this world and you slept with her husband on their wedding night? How can you be my sister?" She pushed me back into the bed before getting up pacing the room.

"I'm sorry Lagertha." I wiped my mouth with the sheet and it came away stained with my blood.

"Rollo? Out of all the boys in the village you chose Rollo Lothbrok?" Her nose wrinkled in disgust.

"I've always loved him, you know that." I sat up in bed and crossed my legs.

"I don't know why. After he got Nessa pregnant, do you know what he said to her father? 'I bet it's not even mine.' His father had to more or less force him to marry her and then, on their wedding night he's mounting you in the stables, and nearly every other night after that if the rumors are to be trusted." She was working herself up again and if she threw another punch I was going to hit her right back this time.

"Rumors are never to be trusted, usually." I rolled my eyes, hating the fact that I couldn't outright deny everything she was saying. She'd see right through a lie and then she'd be even more angry with me.

"How can you put me in this position Ylva? Ever since she lost the baby Nessa has talked about nothing but giving Rollo a son. She comes to me crying about him never being in her bed. She's unhappy and she's talking about leaving him. But I guess that would be good news for you?" When I was silent she continued. "How can I tell her that my baby sister is the whore we sit around cursing?"

"I'm not a whore and you can tell Nessa that she got what she married, he's hasn't changed a bit and he never will." I reached up to touch the bump that was forming on the back of my head.

"Exactly, sister, he is who he is and he will never change. Not for her, not for you." She sat down beside me and rested her hands on my knees.

"He'd change for you." My vision blurred as hot tears began to pool in my eyes.

"That doesn't matter, Ylva, we'll never know. Even if I did have feelings for him I would never even consider it because whether I like it or not, for some insane reason, you love him and you are my sister. I put your feelings above that of any boy." She hugged me then and I hugged her back. Her lack of feelings for Rollo would never change his. I would always be his second choice and my pride wouldn't be able to handle that for very long. A big heavy ball of guilt began to form in the pit of my stomach, we couldn't keep this up. It was hurting too many people. We'd have to talk very soon, but first I had to go kill Ragnar.

Ragnar's plan was simple and brilliant and it went off without a hitch. We didn't have to fight a battle, there were few casualties and we were back in Kattegat within a week. The winter stores had been burned, but we would make do. We had a roof over our heads, a warm fire in front of us, and all the ale and wine we could drink. Plus, for the first time in a very long time, we all had each other. Everyone indulged a bit too much that first night back. Lagertha and Aslaug were getting along swimmingly and I could see the delight in Ragnar's eyes as he watched them. You didn't have to be an empath to know what he was hoping for and as the night wore on it seem like more and more of a possibility. I watched them, but not with jealousy. I was a bit sad. I'd missed my sister terribly and now that I was here with her, I couldn't bring myself to tell her the truth about why I hadn't come home. She would never forgive herself for not looking for me. She would hate herself for not knowing that I was in trouble.

"It's okay to have some fun." Ragnar said, sitting on the bench beside me.

"I am having fun." I gave him a sad excuse for a smile.

"I hope the night treats you well, Ylva. We're getting ready to retire." He smiled across the room and raised his glass.

"Aslaug and Lagertha, you truly are blessed by the God's Ragnar Lothbrok." My smile was genuine as I laughed at his excitement.

"I would ask you to join us, but I'm afraid your big sister would cut off my balls." He winked at me.

"Yes, she would. And I wouldn't want anything like that to happen, not before I get a chance to sample for myself." The wine made my tongue loose and his smiled widened at my cheek.

"I hope you know that I'll hold you to that statement, little wolf." He placed his hand on my shoulder and massaged gently.

"I'm sure you will." I reached up to squeeze his fingers. "But, not tonight. Go, have fun." He glanced back at me as he led both his wife and ex wife towards his bedroom. I looked over to see Rollo staring at me, we smiled and shook our heads as if we were in on a joke that no one else heard.

I decided to take Ragnar's advice and have some fun. So, I grabbed a full jug of ale from the table and sauntered over to where Rollo sat in the corner alone, scanning the room. He watched me intently as I approached, a smile playing at his lips. His breath tickled the back of my neck as I leaned over to refill his empty cup.

"What game is this?" He asked, placing his hand on my waist as I straightened up.

"There is no game, only fun between old friends." I turned to face him, resting my hands on his shoulders.

"After a distraction are you?" He pulled me towards his lap.

"It's not a distraction I'm after, it's pleasure." I lifted one of my legs over his and sat astride him.

"I can offer you both." He grasped my bum with both hands and kneaded gently.

"I'm sure you can." He met my lips as I leaned down to kiss him. It felt as if a bolt of lightning surged through my body when our lips met. He kissed me softly and slowly as if we had all of time in the world. His hand moved up to grasp the back of my neck and he pulled me closer as he deepened the kiss. I moaned low in my throat and he pulled away.

"Who's using who now?" He said, staring at my lips.

"Ragnar isn't here, I'm not trying to make him jealous." His gaze moved from my lips to my chest.

"I don't really care if you are. I don't care about your feelings for my brother, and I care even less about his feelings for you." His hand moved up to cup my breast.

"You don't care about anything, Rollo." I picked up his horn of ale and took a big gulp.

"That's not true." He ran his hands across the base of my spine causing me to arch my back. The sudden breath I inhaled hissed between my teeth as he shifted his hips, pressing the bulge in his pants against me, making my desire for him grow rapidly.

"Yes, it is true." I rocked my hips back and forth eliciting a small groan from him.

"I care about you, Ylva, and giving you want you want." I threw my arms around his neck and wrapped my legs around his waist as he stood up and walked towards my room.

"Right now, I want you." I whispered into his ear as he kicked my door open, tossing me onto the bed before kicking it shut again.

"That's exactly what I'm going to give you." We shed our clothes and he knelt between my legs, a sigh of pure ecstasy escaped my lips as he entered me. He started off slowly, agonizingly slow as he withdrew himself inch by inch, taking his time, coaxing me to orgasm. It seemed as if his mouth was everywhere, my lips, my neck, he traced the folds of my ear with his tongue, sending shivers all the way down to my toes. I called out his name as I felt my pleasure building.

"Now, you are truly home." He whispered in my ear as I grasped his shoulders. I felt myself convulsing around him as he buried himself deep within me. I could never deny the connection that we had. He was the only man I'd ever willingly been with. He knew me inside and out, even after all of these years. The sun was high in the sky when we finally fell asleep, wrapped in each other's arms.