It's not like I'm in love with Chara. It's not that dorky goofy kind of love in Alphys' comics. It's not how I felt about Mom or Dad, either. And without a soul, I shouldn't be able to feel any love at all.
But there's something there. There's something special.
Is this what I'm looking for? Is this what will keep me happy down here? Is this the answer?
I want to talk to Chara about it. But I'm not sure what they'll say. What if they think it's weird? What if they don't like it?
I don't know what to do. It's not like I can just reset if I make a mistake and say the wrong thing. Chara will remember.
I wonder how they feel about me.
The next couple of days, I can't think about anything else. It makes it hard to have fun… I've got too much stuff on my mind.
Eventually, Chara notices.
"What's up, Asriel?" They ask. "You seem a little down."
This is going to be hard.
"Chara… I wanted to talk about the kiss."
They smile. Another innocent smile. They have no idea.
"Why? Did I smell nice?" They ask.
I inch over to them. They kiss me again.
When they let go, I feel a little dizzy.
"Well?" They ask.
"Yeah… you smell nice."
"Good."
Silence.
"What's going on?" They ask.
"I don't know." I say. "I just really like you and I like that you kissed me. It's nice. But… I don't think you feel the same way."
"Of course I do."
"It's not the same thing." I say. "It was a really big deal to me… I still can't stop thinking about. I don't think you felt it like I did."
They think.
"No, I don't think I feel the same way." They say. "Is that bad?"
"Just seems a little sad."
"Don't be sad, Asriel." They say.
They give me another peck.
"Everything is okay." They say. "Right?"
"I…"
"What?"
"I love you, Chara."
"I love you, too." They say.
"But…"
They roll their eyes.
"Listen." They say. "Are you happy I'm around?"
"Yes. Of course."
"And I'm happy you're around." They say. "Are you glad that we're friends?"
"Yeah."
"Me, too." They say. "Do you like playing with me?"
"Yes."
"And I like playing with you. Would you like a kiss?"
"Y-yeah."
"Me, too!"
They kiss me again.
They do smell nice.
"Then we do feel the same." They say. "So. Are you ready to stop feeling weird and go out to play?"
"Um… okay."
"Great!"
Things still feel a little weird now and then, but I get used to it. Chara was right. Things are okay.
I like this.
It doesn't hurt anymore. The pain is gone. The boredom is gone. The confusion is gone. All of the bad stuff just went away.
I don't have everything. I'd still like to be a monster again. I miss Chara ruffling my fur. I miss them playing with my ears. And I miss being able to hug them back, with real hands.
But I love this. I love Chara, soul or no. Life is fun again.
And we're safe.
No matter what happens, we can always reset. We can play together forever.
It's perfect.
A good dream.
"Chara?"
"Yes?"
"I just wanted you to know that I care about you. I want you to know that I love you and I'm happy you're my friend. That's all."
"You took the words out of my mouth." They say.
"I love you." I say. "I always will."
They nuzzle my face.
"You know what we need to do next?" They ask.
"What?"
"I'm going to get you a new body." They say. "That's all we're missing."
"Well… well, thanks, Chara." I say. "That would be great. But how are we going to do that?"
"Don't know." They say. "But we're gonna figure it out. Anything you want, Asriel. I'll make it happen."
"Really?"
"Of course." They say. "I'd do anything for you."