I wasn't going to post another chapter till 'WIIWN' was marked complete but I wanted to address my anonymous reviewer.
I never gave it much thought but I guess I'm just more comfortable writing in Damon's point of view. But in no way do I believe that I make Elena a secondary character. 'Only Time' is a multi-chapter story that is written in Elena's voice. 'Halo', 'There You'll Be', 'The Necklace'. and 'Yes Virginia, There is a Santa Claus' are all written in Elena's voice as well. Although 'Breathe' is written in Damon's voice, Elena's disability is the focus of the story.
Elena plays a valuable role in all of my stories. I know writing in Damon's POV, we do hear his voice more often. but she is his equal and I would never diminish how important she is. That said, I will certainly consider writing a longer story from Elena's perspective if either Eva or I can come up with a fetching idea. Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts and concerns with me.
More of this will post as soon as we turn the lights out on the other story.
"I can't do this anymore, no, what I mean is I don't want to play house with you anymore. I want to do what I want, when I want without having to answer to anyone," she yells at me.
"But I thought you were happy and you wanted to be with me? I make a good living. I've given you everything you've asked for. Why are you doing this?" I scream back, fisting my hands in my hair.
"Can't you get it through your thick skull, I want nothing to do with you. I can hardly stand even stand to look at you," she spews, twisting the dagger in deeper with each syllable that flies out of her mouth.
"What have I done to make you feel this way?"
"Nothing, I just don't like you very much," she finishes, her voice trailing when a car horn sounds. When I look at the window, I see a blonde-haired, big burly, football type waiting in a convertible in my driveway.
"Who's that?"
"My ride. Goodbye, Damon. It's been fun... not," she sneers, slamming the door closed behind her.
It's already been a few months since she went away. I couldn't file a missing persons report with the police because she left of her own volition. I'm trying to put my life back together as best I can. There is a part of me that never wants to see her again while another part of me desperately wants her to come back. If for nothing else than to settle things between us. The only contact I've had with her was a quick text to let me know that she was safe. I've always tried to be home by six so we could spend our evenings together. I had no idea she was so unhappy with me and our life together. Maybe if she comes back, we could try counseling?
It's a Saturday afternoon. Finally I have a moment to relax so I sit down in the living room to read today's newspaper. When I hear the doorbell ring, I get up from my chair to answer it. Pulling it open, I see Stefan standing there with a female police officer.
With my eyes darting from one to the other, confused, I turn to Stefan. "What..., What's going on?" As soon as she says it, my knees buckle as I collapse to the floor, not wanting to believe what I just heard. 'Drowning? What? No, no, no?" I whimper, tears filling my eyes.
Flying upright in bed, I inhale a deep shuddering breath when I realize it was just another nightmare. It's still pitch dark in my room except for the glow of my clock. It's only three o'clock in the morning so I lay back down. My heart is still thundering against my rib cage so I press my palm to my chest hoping it'll calm down and allow me to go back to sleep.
I have to start doing my time at Happy Dale tomorrow. I wonder if I'll see that girl again? Taking a deep breath, I finally release my palm from my chest when it starts thrumming normally again. Reaching over to my bedside stand, I grab the water bottle and take a drink. Sighing, I put it back before laying back down. Hoping that I can get a few more hours of sleep, I roll onto my side and close my eyes.
"Good morning Mr. Salvatore," April, Mrs. Lockwood's secretary greets me the next morning when I step into her office to learn my assignment for the day.
"Hello, I didn't know if I was to report here first?" I ask, unsure.
"Yes it is. We need to log you in so the court knows that you have fulfilled your sentence mandate," she tells me. "Mrs. Lockwood isn't in today. You're to report to Dr. Mikaelson. I believe he has need of some help today. Do you know where his office is?"
"I met him last week but I don't begin to know which one is his office."
"If you'll have a seat, I'll take you there in a few minutes. I need to get someone to watch my desk," she tells me, pointing to the seating area. Maybe ten minutes pass by the time she asks me to follow her. She points out various offices and reminds me of where the cafeteria is for when I take my lunch break. When we arrive at Dr. Mikaelson's office, she steps inside, holding the door open, gesturing for me to enter.
"Lisa, this is Mr. Salvatore," she says, pointing to me. Making eye contact, I nod at her while grimacing on the inside.
"Mrs. Lockwood said he should work with Dr. Nik today."
"Have a seat Mr. Salvatore. I'll see if the Dr. is ready for you," she says, turning to April to whisper something in her ear. Both women giggle for a few moments before April says goodbye and walks out of this office. I pick up a magazine. Just as I open it up, I hear my name.
"Damon, how are you today?" Dr. Mikaelson greets me.
"I'm here," I reply with lackluster.
"Don't sound so excited," he teases, sarcasm not withstanding. "Come now, I'm taking a few of the young people out for a day trip. We're going to the mall."
"The mall? What's at the mall?" I ask incredulously.
"We're only taking seven people Damon. I can't keep an eye on them by myself. A few of them have been in here since they were teens. I want to show them around, show them what things cost these days. They need to learn how to budget their money if they're to make ends meet when they leave here," he explains.
"I guess it's understandable when you frame it that way."
"Alright then, let's get going. After you," he says, gesturing for me to go first. I walk alongside him till we arrive at the main atrium of the hospital. With my eyes, I look around to see if I can catch a glimpse of that girl. Under the pretense of looking at the landscaping, I even take a moment to walk over and look out of the window. I don't know why but I want to see her again. I haven't felt anything or anyone tug at my consciousness for a very long time. Unfortunately she's nowhere to be seen today.
"Good morning everyone," the Dr. begins. I'd like to introduce you to Damon. He's going to be going with us today to help me keep an eye on you all. Before you start tossing out allegations about mistrust, I just don't want any of you to destroy your chance to get out of here and start your lives free and clear of this place. If you try to wander off, you'll be caught and sentenced to come back here. It'll be up to a Judge to decide that but as a few of you are well aware, there are some bad ass judges out there," he says to them with a wink.
Shaking my head, I can't help but agree with him. That's the reason I'm here after all.
"Everyone, let's go outside to the bus," Dr. Nik tells them. They take their turns getting in the mini bus with me following the last person. Dr. Nik gets in the driver's seat with me in the passenger seat. The mall is about twenty miles away in the next town. It's a pretty good sized one. Nik takes a group of four people while I take a group of three. He tells me to take them in the different stores and show them prices and fill out employment applications as they're scheduled to be released from confinement very soon.
"Mr. Salvatore, can you help me with this application?" the girl named Jasmine asks. Walking over, I look over her shoulder as she points out the question.
"That's simple, they just want to know what date you'd be available to start working should they decide to hire you," I explain to her. "Do you have a date to be released?" I ask, honestly trying to help her out.
"Yeah, it's in six weeks. I have a calendar in my room to mark off the days. Thanks," she says, sucking her lower lip into her mouth.
"No problem. I'll let you finish," I tell her, stepping back. Once they're all finished with filling out applications, we make our way to the café court which is where Dr. Nik told us all to meet up.
Once we arrive, I look around to see if I can see the other group. Just as I'm about to give up and take a table, I see him wave his hand for us to join the rest of them. Once we all get something to eat, we wander around the mall a little longer before piling back onto the bus to go back to the facility.
Once we're back at Happy Dale, the group disembarks the bus and we all go back inside the facility. Glancing at my watch, I notice it's nearly four in the afternoon and it's time for me to go home for the day. After going to Mrs. Lockwood's office to check out, I walk to the bus stop and wait for it to arrive. With nothing better to do, I pull out my cell phone and call my dad.
"Hello?"
"Hi dad," I tell him softly.
"Damon? How are you, son?"
"I'm lost dad," I whisper, turning to look on either side of me to make sure I'm really alone.
"How can I help you?" he asks. I can hear the sincerity in his tone.
"I don't know dad. I have to fulfill my court ordered sentence. Maybe after that, I'll close up shop for a couple of weeks and come home, if that's okay?"
"Of course, it's okay son. I do understand what you're going through," he tells me.
"I know. You're the only one I can talk to. Everyone else just tries to make me forget and I can't."
"Have you ever thought about seeing a counselor?"
"Not really," I tell him. When I hear the bus pull up, I raise my eyes signaling the driver to give me a second.
"Listen dad, I have to go. My bus is here. I'll talk to you soon. Bye now," I tell him then click my phone off and climb on the bus.
I'm scheduled to go to Happy Dale three times this week. But today I find myself in the development part of my business. I'm working on a new prototype for a video game format that I have developed. When I was in college, I developed a video game. Fortunately when I presented it to one of the game system manufacturers, they snapped it up. I was given a large amount of money plus a portion of each unit sold. After that, I developed one after another of successful games which is why I have all the money that I'll ever need.
Sitting in front of the computer, I start to do some work, taking measurements and adjusting pixels and getting the color scheme in order. I usually just develop a prototype. When it's purchased by a manufacturer, they add all the fancy graphics and animation as well as even more brilliant colors. I'm proud of my work and it does take my mind off of things for awhile. I just haven't been able to do the face to face with my buyers after everything happened. I threw myself right onto a path of self destruction culminating in my DWI arrest. While I'm grateful that I didn't hurt anyone, a little part of me wishes I wouldn't have been so lucky with myself.
Since that day, nothing makes sense in my life. Glancing at the picture adhered to the edge of my computer monitor, I reach up shakily to run my fingers over the eyes that are staring back at me. Dropping my head into my hands, I take a deep breath to try to ground myself. When I hear the door open, I quickly feign working so whoever it is will leave quickly.
"Damon?" Rolling my eyes, I turn to look at my brother.
"What is it, Stefan?" I ask.
"Now that you're starting to show up for work, I'm going to start filling out job applications. Do you understand?"
"No, Stefan. A simpleton like myself cannot comprehend something so profound."
"Quit with the sarcasm. This place holds no interest for me. I only stepped in to help you after that day. I didn't sign up for a lifetime of this," he tells me, his voice full of contempt.
"Why are you even still here then? Don't get me wrong, I am grateful that you helped me out after everything but I didn't ask you to give up your dreams to pull me up by the bootstraps you know?"
"Let's not do this okay?" he replies, raising his arms in surrender.
"You're the one who barged in here."
"I know. I'm going back to the office. I have an appointment with a representative from "Anderson Gaming" so I need to prepare a presentation. Do you want to get something to eat after while? I can ask Caroline to set another place."
"No, I'm just going to go home when I'm done for the day." Turning away from him, I focus on the computer monitor in front of me.
"Damon, you have to eat. You've lost at least twenty-five pounds."
"Stefan, what part of I don't want to talk about it do you not understand?" I ask angrily, turning away from him.
"Why am I here?" he asks, storming out of my draft-room. When I hear the door slam shut, I breathe a sigh of relief that he's gone. Deciding I'm not going to get anything else done today, I shut down my computer and leave through the back door so no one will notice that I've left.
I walk around aimlessly till I find myself in front of little bar and grill. Once inside, I walk over to take a seat at the bar. After ordering a double bourbon, I let myself relax and take a big swallow, savoring the burn as it goes down.
"Leave the bottle," I tell him. Shrugging his shoulders, he sets it in front of me. Having already filled my glass twice, I reach to fill it a third time when I feel a hand pressing down on my forearm stopping me from filling my glass again.
"You got troubles, sugar?" she asks when I turn to see who's beside me.
"Look, I want to be alone," I tell her, pulling my arm out from under hers to pour myself another.
"A handsome fella like you drinking all by yourself? Surely there's a story there? I'm a good listener," she adds in her southern drawl.
"Please, I just want to be alone," I stress to her.
"I don't believe that, sugar," she replies, with a wink as she leans forward letting her buxom breasts practically fall out of her top.
"Lady, enough. Are you really this thick? What part of I'm not interested escapes you?" I snap, looking at her with disgust.
"Well, I never," she answers, feigning indignation.
Rolling my eyes, I just turn back to my bottle. After paying my bill, I stumble out of the bar almost doing a face plant on the sidewalk. With much effort I get back on my feet, swaying with each step on my way home. Fortunately it's only a few blocks. Somehow I make it home without breaking any bones. Letting myself in the dark empty unnatural solitude of my house, I fall down onto the couch face first and close my eyes, hoping maybe I won't wake up this time.
Thank you so much Eva for everything. And I also want to thank those of you who took the time to read, review, follow and favorite. Thank you so much.
Please remember this story is so much more complicated than the title seems to suggest.
Chapter title: 'Whiskey Lullaby' by 'Brad Paisley and Allison Krauss'.
Please watch for updates on 'What if I Was Nothing', 'Rainy Days and Mondays' and 'The Unforgiven'.
Please remember to hit that review button. I'm trying to start work on another one of Eva's brilliant ideas. It'll take some research and it is complicated so I hope it'll come easier than this story did.
Stay safe and have a wonderful day. Thank you all again. See you right here next time.