No fear, I am still alive. Life's just been so hectic, I have all these essays to do for college (exams coming up, argh!) and then work at the weekends and every time I tried to write this chapter, I just ended up constantly hating the result. Words were just NOT flowing lol. But! I will no longer bore you with such boring and cliché details.

A quick thank you!! to you all you lovelies who reviewed last chapter + those who alerted and put me in your favourites. I'm thrilled that your reading my story and taking time to tell me what you think. And totallyanon, just for you since you asked (which I'm delighted about lol) the fat content of one McVities Hobnob with the chocolate on top issssss………4.5g!! No joke! When I found out I almost died since I eat like 6 at a time, lol!

DISCLAIMER! All rights go to J. K. Rowling for creating Harry Potter and so on, and this story is purely for my own cheap thrills.

"Aoife, you can't possibly be serious."

"What?"

"We can't turn Malfoy into a toad!"

"And why not?" I challenged, tearing off a new chunk of blueberry muffin with my teeth and chewing it savagely in my mouth.

"Because it's completely immoral, that's why!" Annie gasped, her eyes bulging behind her spectacles as if astounded that I hadn't already considered the ethical issues of turning a boy into an amphibian. Not that I had mind you, but when that boy turns out to be a Malfoy, a person hardly burdened with morality (Malfoy had, after all bewitched snowmen to chase first years and pull down their trousers last year) I just didn't see the point. Taste of his own potion, that's what I say!

I shrugged a shoulder and polished of the rest of my cake, before plucking a slice of toast from the passing toast rack and spreading a thick layer of jam across the bread. "Yeah, so?"

"darling…" Annie sighed, "Two wrongs don't necessarily make a right."

"Yeah, yeah," I mumbled, waving my hand airily. "I know, but Annie. This is Malfoy we're talking about. Malfoy."

"I know darling," she conceded. "But imagine if you couldn't turn him back! Can't you just imagine how utterly horrifying that would be!"

"Er…no," I said honestly because the prospect of Malfoy being a toad forever didn't actually sound half bad. She rolled her eyes.

"Well I think it's terrible and since I would be the one forced to do it, that quite simply eliminates that idea." I didn't bother to argue because I knew full well that she was right. Annie was almost in Granger's league in Transfiguration, turning noses into beaks faster than I could blink, where I, on the other hand, was more on par with the Longbottom kid.

"So what we going to do now then?"

"Hmm…" she sipped some pumpkin juice from her goblet, pressing her lips together as she thought. I, on the other hand, preoccupied myself with shovelling eggs, bacon, tomatoes, French toast, and two more blueberry muffins onto my plate, practically salivating as the glorious delights spun delicious curls of steam into my nostrils.

It was only when I was mopping some tomato juice from my chin, that Annie began to speak.

"You say you want to destroy Draco Malfoy, yes darling?" she continued without looking at me, her eyes a tad glazed and peering at something over my shoulder.

"Well, I feel it's quite simple." Annie laid her palms flat against the table and leant forward. I noticed her eyes were no longer dulled with the vestiges of thought, but sharp and gleaming in the morning light spilling through the overhead windows.

"We must destroy everything that is Draco Malfoy."

At my gormless expression, she trudged on. "You know! Everything that makes him, him. Like, oh I don't know - his friends perhaps! After all, have you ever seen Malfoy without Crabbe and Goyle and the rest of his posse? Without them, why I believe he wouldn't have quite the same amount of backbone as he does with them." I nodded slowly, letting her words churn through my mind. Destroy everything that makes him, him. But what the hell makes Draco Malfoy?

I spooned some egg into my mouth and chewed it thoughtfully.

Slowly, the return journey to the common room with him last night swam to the forefront of my mind. Not once did his mouth halt from spilling insults and promoting his own self superiority! In my minds eye I saw myself walking alongside him, my height greatly surpassed by the tall, lean strength of his frame. The outline of muscles I had shamefully salivated at in Snape's office drifted back to my attention, as if attached by string to the prior image. And there was always that shock of blonde hair he had, flopping over the eyes I had heard many a girl sigh over.

Bugger it, you'd think I was his stalker or something.

I was ready to scold myself when I stopped. How did Malfoy have Parkinson stalking him (excluding the fact that Parkinson was already a mental case) and dreaming dreams which exuded sighs and giggles and terms that made me thank Merlin's cotton socks I couldn't mind read? How did he have nearly all of the female population eating from the palm of his slender fingered hands?

His looks!

Malfoy's looks were pretty much essential to who he was! Put a face like Crabbe or Goyle's under that mop of blonde hair, and I don't think he'd have quite as much of a hold over the student body as he does with his own mug.

"His face!" I cried, beaming. "We have to destroy his face!"

Annie blinked, looking quite startled. "Well, I wasn't wanting to get quite too physical darling. Violence is, after all, a conduct my nature does not allow."

"I meant his looks," I said impatiently. "We could turn his hair green or make his nose really big and ugly and fat - not that it isn't already, mind you - or hex him! Give him boils!"

"Yes," she whispered. "That would utterly ruin his chances with the ladies! And according to things that I've read darling, that can make a man incredibly frustrated."

"And so his reputation would go down the tubes!" I laughed gleefully. Who would've thought ruining a man was so much bloody fun!

"yes, but we'll have to take precautions," Annie said sternly. "After all, we don't want anyone realising it's you who's doing it. We'll have to make it known to Malfoy of course, but we can't have any incriminating evidence against us. I also think it would be advisable to wait until after the Quidditch trials before implementing this plan of sorts-"

"W - what?" I stammered, unsure I'd heard her correct.

"Well darling, we do have to give Malfoy the chance to prove himself. Wouldn't you just be plagued with guilt if we conducted the plan and he let you on the team from goodwill! Just think of how entirely unfair it would be to him."

I stared, open mouthed at her. A chance to bloody prove himself? Prove himself? Malfoy? Don't make me laugh! Besides, who was it getting in all of a flutter because of the injustice of the situation after the Great Hall? Declaring that she would kick a certain somebody's 'dainty little bottom' to the bottom of the Great Lake just earlier? Annie! And now, now she was wanting to give him the chance to prove himself?

"Annie, this is Malfoy we're talking about."

"Yes, I know darling."

"He's had nearly seven years to prove himself and he hasn't. Do you wanna know why? Because he likes being mean. He doesn't want to change!"

"That may be so darling, but, on this occasion I have to stick to my guns. I will not help you initiate this plan without some good reason to. I couldn't. As I've already said I'd -"

"'be plagued with guilt', yeah, I know."

"So, darling, do you agree?"

I did. And then I promptly left, snatching my new timetable (given to me earlier by the one and only Snape though for this meeting, he was without tartan pyjamas) and muttering heatedly under my breath about bloody peace lovers.

No Malfoy, sorry folks. Next chapter, he will make his arrogant butty known, promise!

Don't really like this chapter much, but I'm just getting a little sick of rewriting it so it'll just have to do. Might return to edit it later. I'm just so sorry for the long wait.

but, how 'bout a review? Pretty, pretty please?

Xx