When I got up to my room, I didn't expect Edward to be there. After he had reacted today, so angry and hurt, I thought he might need time to himself. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw him waiting on my bad. He looked up at me with sad eyes.
I sighed and took a seat next to him. He took and breath to steady himself before he began. "Bella, I should apologize for how I acted today…I just…I don't understand why you never told me." His eyes bore into mine.
"I'm sorry, too, Edward. I SHOULD have told you. Heck, I thought you would have sensed something was different or even familiar about me when we first met…I kind of thought that is why you were so angry at me that first day…I'm a contradiction. I shouldn't exist," I explained, hanging my head.
He reached over and cupped my chin in his head, directing me to face him. "You, Bella, are nothing but perfect. I thank God that you exist," He breathed in my ear before leaning in to place his lips on mine, gently.
"I told you the truth when I said I wanted to protect you…But I had more selfish reasons for keeping it from you," I admitted, pulling myself away from his grasp. "The thing is, Edward. I've always been different. I have had to try so hard to be 'normal'. I have always had to be guarded, making sure that I didn't throw a ball too hard, run too fast. I had to be careful to protect my mom as well as myself. One slip up and my world could come crashing down around me….And then I met you…And you saw me as vulnerable. You saw me as human. I wanted to be that so bad. It felt good to be protected by you. And then it just harder to tell you as time went by," I said, now pacing and back and forth in my room.
"I will always be there to protect you, Bella," He said, breaking into a grin. "I don't care if you can bench me with one arm." He chuckled and pulled me into his lap.
"You just say that because you are afraid of me," I replied sarcastically. He chuckled again and nuzzled my neck. I sighed after a while and looked, aimlessly at the wall.
"What is it, Bella," He asked softly.
"It's just…another reason…another way I was being selfish was that I felt…for the first time, I felt like I found that missing piece of me, you know? I can't fully relate to my mom, you know? To a point I can, but there was always that other side of me that has always remained a mystery. And then with you and your family…I feel closer to myself, almost.…I don't really remember my father…I feel like…like I have finally found home," I finished. Edward pulled me in and held me tightly, kissing my neck and back of my head.
"Yes, Bella, my love, I know what you mean," he whispered.
After a while, I started to snicker. He pulled away and looked at my face with a mischievous grin.
"What is it," He asked.
"It's just, I would have liked to see you TRY to bite me! I would have turned you into a bunny," I giggled.
"A bunny," he questioned, raising an eyebrow.
"You would have been cute and cuddly…I could have been worse," I shrugged. I laid down and settled into sleep with Edward comfortably wrapped around me.
*************************
It was Saturday and I was in Edward's room with him, critiquing his music selection when there was a knock at the door.
"Come in, Carlisle," Edward called.
"Thanks, Edward. Bella, I was wondering if we could try something," Carlisle asked.
"Sure, Carlisle," I replied.
"Carlisle, I'm not sure if this is a good idea," Edward responded to Carlisle's plans in his head.
"What is it," I asked.
"Bella, I was just thinking perhaps we could test the extent of your ability to get a better understanding of how it works," Carlisle explains, cautiously. I beamed and jumped off Edward's couch.
"I think that is a great idea, Carlisle," I exclaimed. Edward reached out a hand and grabbed me by the arm, spinning me to face him. His face was fully of worry. I reached out a hand and caressed his cheek softly.
"No need to worry, Edward. This is good. I need to, for myself, understand this part of me. I've never been given an opportunity to practice…and have people who can help me, guide me," I explained. His features relaxed and he looked at my sympathetically. He nodded and I patted the hand he had on my arm.
We moved downstairs to the living room. The rest of the family gathered around, silently, to watch.
"Bella, you mentioned earlier that you felt like something projected from you, when the guards appeared in the room…I wonder, could you concentrate, focus on that and that alone, without thinking of animals," Carlisle asked. I heard Emmett chuckle and I shot him a dark look. I turned my attention back to Carlisle and nodded my head.
Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes. I felt a throbbing, a pulling in my head.
"Okay, Bella…Do you have a handle on it," Carlisle asked in low voice. I squeezed my eyes tighter and nodded in response.
"She looks constipated," Emmett snickered. Just like that, my eyes snapped open and I felt my energy rush towards Emmett. In a flash, a large donkey stood in his place. I heard a collective gasp in the room. I felt my face start to blush.
"Oops, sorry," I whimpered before slinging the energy back towards Emmett until he reappeared. Emmett looked down incredulously, checking to make sure he was on two feet instead of four legs, I am sure. I furrowed my brow and bit my lower lip, wishing I could make myself disappear at that moment.
"Holy shit, Bella," Emmett bellowed. A smile slowly spread across his face.
"And to think, Emmett, she hasn't even known you that long. She's already gotten you figured out," Rosalie laughed. The whole room seemed to break down at that moment.
Why…did…you…change…him….back," Alice asked, in between fits of laughter. I started to giggle myself.
"I didn't figure Esme would appreciate that in her living room," I replied, shrugging my shoulders. Edward caught his breath and put his arm around me.
"I think that's enough for today," He said.
"Hell yeah, it is," Emmett scoffed.
"I have to get home, anyhow," I replied, looking at the time. Edward pulled me in for a hug and kissed the top of my head. We started walking towards the door.
"Goodnight, smartass," Emmett called after us.
"Goodnight, jackass," I replied without turning around. Laughter again erupted in the house as we shut door.
As we pulled out onto the road, Edward looked over at me, eyes full of wonder.
"What," I asked self-consciously, feeling the blush returning to my cheeks.
"That was pretty funny, Bella," He laughed.
"I didn't mean to," I said under my breath, trying to stifle my own giggles.
"What does it feel like when you do that," He asked, more serious this time.
I shrugged and thought about it for a minute. "I guess, it feels like stretching a muscle that you don't use that often…it felt weird just to hold it there like I was, before Emmett made his comment," I tried explaining.
"And then you got pissed and changed him," Edward asked, smiling again, at the memory.
"It's not like that…It's just that when he said that, my attention focused on him and I was thinking about what an ass he is," I tried explaining. This comment sent Edward into hysterics. I was afraid I was going to have to grab the wheel before he calmed down.
We pulled up to my house and I leaned towards him for a kiss. He smiled and pressed his perfect lips to mine, kissing me gently. Pulling back, he grinned his crocked grin that I love and brushed his fingers gently across my cheek.
"I love you so much, Isabella Swan," He marveled.
"I love you, too, Edward Cullen," I replied with a smile.
"Are you sure you will be okay tonight? We can leave to hunt tomorrow, instead," He asked.
"I'm fine. Go. Enjoy yourself," I assured him. He walked me to the front door and leaned down to kiss me again. His lips moved urgently and passionately with mine. The porch light flashed on and we heard Charlie clear his throat loudly from the other side of the door. We pulled apart and smiled at each other.
"Goodnight, my love," He whispered softly in my ear.
"Goodnight," I replied. I watched him jog back to his car and waved as he pulled. I waved and watched the taillights disappear. Life couldn't get more perfect, I thought to myself.
*******************************
I awoke to the sun breaking through my shades. I stretched and pulled myself out of bed. I heard the phone ring downstairs and Charlie answer it. As I headed to the shower, I heard that Charlie's voice sounded frantic. I changed course and headed downstairs. Charlie turned to look at me, his eyes full of distress.
"What is it, Charlie," I asked, my voice strained.
"It's your mom…She's missing, Bella," He exclaimed.