A/N: Ok, so technically, to follow along with SLP, I should now skip ahead to Lily's third year (Scorpius' Fifth) but what fun is that, especially when SO much happened during that time… Sorry it's taken me FOREVER to get this written. I took like… two/three months off (or so it seems). This chapter was a little awkward to write, since I had to use flashbacks from the original to figure out what went on during this time. I might have to go back and change some things, but all in all… here it is. The next chapter will come out a lot quicker than this one, I promise. I'm already writing it in my head.

Disc.: Creation is a start. Manipulation is divine.

Everything In Between

I knew that nothing good could ever come from my grandfather summoning me to his chambers when he did. I walked slowly, already certain of what I would say to him about this whole arranged marriage thing. Ok, so I didn't LOVE Lily, not yet, but I could see myself liking her enough to want to see where things would go with her. I wanted a stay of execution, if you will, a chance. He looked up at me from his desk, his look cold and hard.

"Scorpius, your grandmother mentioned to me…" he started as I barely had a chance to sit at the chair he had indicated at me.

I fought him tooth and nail, not wanting to let him win, but Lucius Malfoy wasn't a man that others said 'no' to. I could feel him breaking me down, piece by piece, until there was nothing left for me to use against him. There was nothing left in me to stand up to him against. In the end, I hung my head and walked away, knowing that he had won. I was, still, betrothed to Darla Goyle.

When I returned to school, it was with the knowledge that the kind thing was to just let Lily go. Kind to me, kind to her, I really should have put some serious distance between the two of us. Instead, I found myself drawn to her, hanging out with her whenever I got the chance. I was with Darla, even though I hadn't admitted it to Lily yet. I felt myself constantly setting the boundaries, playfully, so not to hurt Lily.

"You're like the little sister I never wanted," I teased her all the time. She'd laugh.

"Like I need any more older-brothers, Score," I'd hear her reply time and time again. I knew how much she liked me. I could tell by the way I'd sometimes catch her grinning at me. It didn't help matters that Damon pointed it out that I was attracting the first year girls like flies to honey.

"You're a good friend," I had been saying for ages to her, hoping to drill it into her thick skull that she and I could only be friends. No matter how much I tried to tell her, no matter what I said, I knew from that look that she was falling for me. I knew that I needed to tell her, tell her about my relationship with Darla, but I just couldn't. I probably should have tried harder, but something in me didn't want to. I knew that Lily has respect and would step away from our friendship, even if just slightly, the minute she found out that Darla and I were betrothed.

"Hey, Lils," I said. I had left Darla gossiping with her older sister, my friend Elena, who was making eyes at Damon. Lily was down by the lake on one of the first nice days of spring. She was tucked between the high roots of the tree. She looked up at me and grinned as I sat. "What're you up to?"

"Nothing much," she said as she continued to link daisies. Asher was swatting at the flowers as she secured them. She laughed at him, her laughter light compared to the sometimes overly loud and crass laughter that spilled from Darla's mouth. I liked Lily's laugh.

"Daisy chain?" I asked with a grin. I nudged her shoulder with my own. She playfully pushed me back and continued to link.

"So you know, I think your rule that I'm too young for you is stupid," she said suddenly. I looked at her completely dumbfounded. I knew she kind of liked me, like a friend, but these words, together, were that of more than friends. I immediately felt like crap, like I was betraying her friendship by not being more honest with her. She looked at me almost with shy expectation. I looked at her uncomfortably.

"Lils, you know I like you, right? You must know that I do," I said slowly, clearly. I didn't want her to think that I didn't like her, I just knew that I couldn't lead her on to think that this friendship could be anything more than friendship. Lily laughed and nodded. She seemed like she was taking this well enough, that she was well aware of why she and I could only be friends, even if she really didn't know the real reason why we could only be friend.

"Don't worry about it, Score," Lily said quickly. She kissed me on the mouth quickly and crowned me with the daisies. "I won't always be seen as too young by you. I can wait." She stood up and looked at me with a smile. I was frozen to my spot in shock. I hadn't expected that, or the jolt of the feelings that electrocuted through me suddenly. I knew it was beyond time. I had to tell her before she wasted another moment on me.

"Lils, wait," I called to her as she scooped Asher up. "I wanted to talk to you a bit more."

"Can't," she called waving and laughing. "I'm to meet with Professor Perkins at his request." I would have chased her down, but I was still frozen in shock. She had kissed me. Lily had kissed me.

I shook the fuzzy thoughts from my head, trying to clear my mind. It, apparently, didn't matter how many times I had told her, really told her that first year and third years had no business being more than friends. I sighed. Kissing her shouldn't have felt like that. It should have been like kissing Gran or my mother. It shouldn't have caught me so off guard. I finally pulled myself up off the ground, and headed into the castle. It was as if my body needed the dank air of the dungeon to clear it of all that was sweet and Lily-like.

"Um… Scorp… are do you need to tell us something?" Damon snickered. I looked at him in shock, knowing damn well that he couldn't know what had just happened.

"No, why?" I said in an almost demanding way. He raised an eyebrow at me but nodded to my head.

"The crown," Damon simply said and I reached up. Oh. I had forgotten that Lily had crowned me.

"It's nothing," I promised as I pulled them from my head. "Look, can we talk? I've got a bit of a problem."

The two of us headed into our dormitory quickly, a look sending our other dorm mates scurrying out. Damon looked at me expectantly and waited. I tossed the crown on my bed and sighed loudly. We remained in silence. How did I tell him this without coming off as a prat? I mean, I was already feeling pretty awful about the fact that I was certain that I had led Lily on by not being more firm. Sure, I told her that we could only ever be friends, but I was positive my actions may have been contradictory.

"What is it?" Damon prompted, I suppose in case I had forgotten I had asked to talk to him.

"Lily," I said. He laughed.

"Of course," Damon said.

"She kissed me," I said. Damon hesitated, his face slightly shocked.

"She… kissed you? What did you do?" Damon asked.

"I tried to get her to stay, I wanted to straighten her out. Put her in her place and all," I said. I had, yeah. I tried, but she had to go see the professor.

"This is a mess," Damon said.

"I know," I agreed. "What do I do?"

"Look, I know that you don't really like the idea, but you're going to have to be more public about your relationship with Darla. It's time," Damon said. "You can't be friends with Lily, with the way that she feels about you. The feelings aren't mutual, are they?"

"No, of course not," I lied quickly.

"You just need to be more forward with her, make her see that this thing she wants, you and her, can never be," Damon said.

I found Lily sitting alone in the library a few days later, just before the Easter holiday. She was staring out the window, doodling on a piece of parchment that was probably supposed to be an essay that she was working on. I headed directly towards her, fully intending on telling her about Darla and me. I had purpose in my eyes, my resolve strong.

Then… she looked at me, her face blossomed into a broad grin, and my resolve crumbled around me. I sat down across from her, not wanting to be too close. She looked at me, watched me with her wide eyes and I felt guilty.

"Scorpius, what brings you to the library on the eve of our Easter holiday?" Lily asked me with quiet mocking. She smiled again, the act punctuating something in me that I couldn't readily put my finger on.

"Lily," I said seriously.

"Uh-oh," she said in mock concern. "I'm in trouble, aren't I?"

"Yeah," I said.

"Serious, huh?" she asked as she watched me. She placed her quill down and gave me her undivided attention. I swallowed nervously.

"This is about that day by the lake," I said nervously. Her smile didn't change.

"Oh?" she said. I could almost hear the hint of excitement in her voice, and I knew I had to be the edge of reason.

"Look, Lily. First years and third years… we just can't… you know?" I stumbled suddenly, uncomfortable with the way her eyes were on me. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I like having you as a friend, but you're really just too young."

"Too young," Lily said as she bit her lip, her smiled faded from her face.

"I just don't want to lead you on, Lily," I said quickly. That much was true. "You can't kiss me again, it's just… too weird. Friends can't go around kissing each other, especially when there are two years between us." She smirked.

"Ok," she said. I was surprised at how well she took it.

"Ok?" I confirmed slowly. She smiled and nodded once.

"Ok," she said. I laughed nervously and stood.

"So, will I see you when we all return for Easter holiday?" I asked her suddenly. I mentally kicked myself, one moment pushing her away, the next pulling her back.

"Try to keep me away," she promised and she laughed.

Easter had been the mess I had expected it to be. Darla and I spent the entire time together, sometimes spending hours and hours just talking. Darla liked to hold hands, and she had taken to kissing me. I laughed the first time she had snuck a kiss, thinking that it must be something among the first years. The girls, at least, seemed to be bolder and aggressive than I ever remembered them being when I was a first year.

"What are you thinking?" Darla asked me as we sat together on the train back to Hogwarts. I looked at her, pulling my eyes from the scenery that sped past us at an alarming rate. My heart quickened at the thought that I would see Lily after a week a part. It bothered me that I was that excited about seeing her.

"Um," I said. I couldn't very well tell Darla that I was thinking about her dorm mate.

"It's that potions' paper isn't it?" Darla asked me sympathetically. I smiled and didn't answer her. I had used that as an excuse to pull myself away from her a few times when her laughter grated too much on my nerves. "Or, it is something else?" Darla asked me cautiously. I swallowed nervously and forced my smile to stay in place.

"I think I'm just a bit… tired," I lied. I swept Darla's hair behind her ear.

Darla wouldn't let it drop, even when we were standing in the common room, waiting for the rest of Slytherin to return to the castle. She was playing the concerned girlfriend role very well, but there was an edge to her voice when she pushed, as if she knew it was something more. I had to shut her up about it, tired of the third degree that she was giving me about it all. I smiled at her, cupping her cheek.

"Silly girl, you worry too much," I said in what oddly came out in a breathy voice. She looked at me, excitement wild in her eyes. I leaned forward and kissed her quite properly, kissed her probably more properly than any first year had yet been kissed. I smiled at her for the moment as I pulled away, my eyes momentarily looking away. They fell on Lily Potter and I could very nearly hear the gears to her heart come to a grinding halt. I nearly opened my mouth to say something, but she whipped around in that brief moment, a flash of her dark auburn hair, and she was gone through the portrait hole.

It was weird how much of the back of Lily Potter I saw after that. I knew she was avoiding me, and there was nothing that I could do about it. If I chased her down, if I explained, it would just hurt her more. I did Lily a favor by allowing her the distance she needed. I knew that she would be happier, one day, if I could only keep away from her. I threw myself head first into my relationship with Darla, focusing only on the good and ignoring the stuff that bothered me: the stuff that reminded me that Darla Goyle was no Lily Potter.

I figured after the summer, Lily would have gotten over her infatuation with me. It still hurt, though, to have her avoid me. Then came the Christmas Ball, held in the Artemis Manor. Darla and I had danced, enjoying our time together. We were all another year older. I was so certain that surely, by now, Lily and I could be friends. I watched her and waited, until she had ditched her two friends and headed out onto the portico alone. She looked at me in shock, as if she had written me off as dead and I had appeared before her in ghost form.

"Lily, please, can we talk?" I asked her. She raised her eye brow at me, her arms crossed. I guess her lack of words were my indication that I should do the talking. "I'm sorry I never told you about my situation with Darla. I should have. I was wrong. Trust me, if it could be any other way… if it could have been anyone else…"

She looked at me in disgust and shook her head.

"I don't want to talk about you and Darla," she said. Her voice had an edge and she shook her head again.

"I want to be friends with you Lily," I told her. She looked at me with such hurt in her eyes and she ran away from me.

I thought about her that night, laying across my bed in my grandparent's house. Ash was off somewhere, being her ornery self, and I heard the sound of a tapping at my window. I glanced over, half expecting to see Darla's family owl, but to my surprise, our golden hawk was there, rapping on the leaded glass. I jumped from the bed, ignoring the cold air on my bare chest as I flung the window open. The hawk soared in, dropping a parcel on my bed. I closed the window as the hawk soared out and headed to the bed.

Resting there, wrapped in brown paper, was the box that held the gift I had sent Lily. It looked as if she had carved "Return to Sender" into the paper. It had torn in a few places, ink staining the rips. I frowned as I picked it up. She hadn't even opened it to see if she'd like it. She must have just carved the words and sent it on its way back to me. I was irritated. I had spent the better part of my Christmas holiday looking for the perfect gift, a last token to bury the hatchet so she and I could be friends.

I knew I was wrong all those times I had held her hand under the table, all those times I would steal a hug from her, holding her a little tighter than I needed to. Seeing her return my gift unopened was the final nail in my heart. She was done with me, done with our friendship.

As much as it bothered me, I really did a wonderful job ignoring Lily as much as she ignored me. Between classes and Darla and Quidditch, I really didn't have time to think about the friend I had lost in Lily Potter. It was only on the nights when I'd sneak out to the kitchens and she'd be curled up in a chair asleep with a book, those nights were the worst because I couldn't erase her from my mind.

"Darla, what's wrong?" I asked though I mentally calculated the days. Darla was holding her stomach and weakly waved me over.

"Womanly problems," she moaned. "I've got to go to the hospital wing."

"Ah," I said and I accompanied her. Once or twice Lily would be nearby with her friends, Darla's other dorm mates, and I swear she looked concerned for Darla. I knew that Lily wasn't exactly Darla's favorite person, and part of that had to do with me, but Lily's concern made me only feel that much more guilty. I couldn't explain it.

Darla was like that every month, three to four days, she'd be laid up in the hospital wing, complaining of womanly problems. At first, I was worried that there was something wrong with her, then I began to think that she may have exaggerated her condition. I didn't see any other girls, her sister included, holed up for days every month. I made the mistake pointing that out to Darla once that neither Kate nor Lily seemed to have that problem. Darla rounded on me, her hands on her hips and a sneer cursing her face.

"Lily! She's not even been through this, so no, you wouldn't see her having this problem," Darla sneered. I knew that there was more that Darla wanted to say, but someone had interrupted us and I couldn't have been more thankful.

I apologized to Darla later for being so cold and cruel, and spent an insane amount of time with her in a broom closet, our arms wrapped firmly around each other. I was doing much better by the end of the summer before my fifth year. Lily's face only graced my mind late at night when I was alone and couldn't sleep. I played with my prefect's badge on the eve of September first, trying to nod off. It was hard to forget about Lily on this day above all others. I absentmindedly fingered the cold, silver badge as I stared at the ceiling.

Today, Lily turned thirteen.