Lose Yourself

Chapter 2

By BluWhispers

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor anything else created by Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This is a YAOI fic. Meaning GUY loves GUY, possibly GUY kiss GUY, and if this was a lemon fic it'd be GUY bang GUY explicitly. If homosexual love does not appeal to you, don't read this. You have been warned. Flames will NOT be appreciated and will definitely be ignored. Constructive criticism is always welcome though.

A/N: Sorry this took forever. Too many things have been going on – and then I lost all the work I'd done on this fic when my laptop and my STUPID external hard-drive crashed. If there are any errors in the plot/grammar/etc, please excuse a sleep-deprived author who hasn't got a beta.

Summary: NejiSasu. AU. Rated for foul language, violence, drug mention, and some hot-and-heavy scenes.

If he was honest with himself, Sasuke would admit that he had been expecting Press to be like one of those tacky, wacky taco-joints that students seemed to gravitate towards. As it was, Press was more like an executive club for the truly sophisticated. All whispers of elegance and scent of old money. Neji looked right at home – but then again Neji seemed to be the type of guy who was perfectly at home anywhere. Not because he conformed to the environment, no way. But because he could make everyone and everything conform to HIM.

Sasuke wondered if that subliminal assertiveness of Neji's was the reason why they were holding hands as they walked through the restaurant: Neji moving purposefully towards the back, Sasuke just following and trying not to look at the gawking patrons while simultaneously trying to glare them all to death. He wondered when he'd decided not to use his powers outside of Mutant High.

He wondered how so many students managed to afford to dine at a snazzy place like Press. And then he wondered when they would stop staring at him like that.

They came upon a patio at last – the kind of patio that would have made kings feel like bumbling peasants. Sasuke prided himself on only gawking for a second – but somehow in that time Neji had managed to very gallantly ensconce Sasuke in a cozy little corner of this perfect little world.

"The usual." Neji's deep voice snapped Sasuke out of his trance, and he was suddenly aware of a man dressed in a sharp suit walking away from their table. Had Neji already ordered?

"I thought we'd start with some drinks, Sasuke-chan." Surely Neji's eyes hadn't been GLOWING this morning? Yet now they were like warm moonlight – if there was such a thing. Sasuke knew he was staring, knew Neji knew, and for some reason he didn't care.

Neji's hand on his thigh and arm around his shoulders grounded him, and his more familiar feelings rose to the fore. His pride railed at his behavior – first the blow-jobs in the car, and now here he was acting like a silly pre-pubescent girl on her first date with Prince Charming.

And when Neji had ordered "the usual", didn't that just mean that he took his dates here often to impress them?

Was Sasuke just another notch in his bed-post then?

He stiffened, tried to pull away. Neji seemed to have anticipated that, and he pulled Sasuke towards him the way one would reel in a petulant kitten – all effortless, knowing, patient, and amused.

Sasuke told himself he would have struggled, really, had their server not appeared with a bottle of Richard Hennessy.

Neji had VERY expensive tastes.

They enjoyed their cognac in a kind of reverent silence, the drink of conquerors for two teenaged boys who had been through more than most men, and who would go through so much more.

"You know I like you, don't you?" Neji broke the silence first, because Sasuke had some time ago realized that he was way out of his depth in these very uncharted waters of intimacy and warmth.

"…yes." The dark-eyed beauty blamed the heat in his cheeks on the alcohol.

"Good." And that seemed to settle that, at least for Neji, who tightened his hold on Sasuke and leaned back, content and majestic in this gastronomical palace.

Sasuke didn't want to think about the consequences of anything. For now, he was happy to just be. He knew from experience that everything would go south when the sun rose, as it always did. He knew from experience that enjoying himself now would only make the loss worse when he was abandoned again.

But such was Neji's intoxicating charm, that for the first time in a long time, Sasuke ignored his instincts and let himself relax into a warm body.

----

Sunlight on his face and for once Sasuke didn't immediately snap awake. He didn't want to be proven right. It was childish, yes, and he thought he'd long ago out-grown pipe dreams and silly hopes. But a part of him that he thought had been buried with his parents was very much alive and really wishing that last night had not been a dream.

"Good morning, angel." A deep voice, husky from sleep reverberated in his ear, making him flush and melt with pleasure. Resolutely he kept his eyes closed, not wanting the dream to end.

"I know you're awake, Sasuke-chan." A chuckle, and dear God was that a warm (and very talented) tongue teasing his ear-lobe?

"Alright then, have it your way." Under ordinary circumstances that amused tone would have sent Sasuke leaping out of bed faster than a homophobe from a trans-sexual. But today was different. Today, Sasuke felt different.

A shift, a rustle, and suddenly Sasuke couldn't have opened his eyes even if he'd wanted to. Warm, perfect heat had surrounded his member, and dimly he thought he heard himself moan.

----

Sasuke took his bath alone – Neji being wise enough to know how far to push Sasuke's limits this early in their relationship. As he showered, Sasuke couldn't help blushing at the memories of last night and this morning. Dinner had been good – Neji had turned out to be ridiculously intelligent and well-read, and a very engaging conversationalist. And to top it all off, the Hyuuga was such a perfect gentleman that even his not-so-proper touching of Sasuke managed to look proprietary.

They had had steak au poivre, and it had been excellent. Topics discussed ran from Ivanhoe to isolation to iconography, and always Sasuke felt like Neji really understood, like he cared enough to understand.

It helped that Neji was smart – Sasuke really wasn't the most patient of people, and he could never understand why no one else seemed to get things as quickly as he did. He'd always been quick, always had an agile mind, even before his powers woke.

Neji had surprised Sasuke by his ability to keep up with the speed of his mind. Sasuke didn't respect many people, but he was rapidly starting to realize that when everything about Neji demanded respect, it was because this was someone who actually deserved it.

They hadn't had sex when they got back to the dorm, Neji telling Sasuke very gently that he wasn't the type to take advantage, and he'd already waited for Sasuke for so many years, so what was a few more dates?

Sasuke had felt touched, and faintly mortified. He was turning into such a girl.

It was Saturday, and according to Neji they were supposed to meet the others for a late breakfast and then a tour of the facilities. When Sasuke said he knew his way around the school just fine, thank you very much, Neji had smirked in that disgustingly sexy way of his and said that there was something underneath the underneath. Whatever that meant.

As he pulled on his clothes, his familiar paranoia came back and cloaked him like a skin that fit him better than his own. Neji was wonderful, too wonderful. And it had been too perfect. Surely that was unrealistic – to meet someone who was everything you wanted a partner to be, to spend your first date in paradise, to have nothing go wrong and everything go so right. It was too good to be true.

How could someone as perfect as Neji possibly be interested in a blood-thirsty orphan like him anyway? Sasuke was no fool – he knew he had more issues than Marilyn Manson. Who would want that kind of emotional baggage?

Who would like an unwanted child of a desecrated family?

Neji had professed a liking for him. Sasuke knew the sexual attraction was real, knew it was mutual. But he had found himself more attracted to Neji's depth, intelligence, charm, and utter chivalry.

And Neji was apparently even more enamored with Sasuke.

It was definitely too good to be true. And Sasuke cursed himself for not realizing it earlier.

Perhaps hidden cameras, perhaps drugs in his drinks when he hadn't been looking, perhaps swirling black on red when he'd let his guard slip. Perhaps when they were "touring" the facilities later, "underneath the underneath", perhaps that was when they would attack, when they would surround him and hold him down and take whatever they wanted from him.

Kakashi wouldn't allow it, but Kakashi hadn't stopped Itachi all those years ago either. Kakashi should have seen the signs, should have realized something was up. Kakashi was supposed to be one of the smartest people in the world.

Kakashi was supposed to protect him

Maybe this time, Kakashi wouldn't see the signs until it was too late again. And then Sasuke would have to pick himself up and try to hold his head high while he crawled away and hoped for a sleep that would never end.

He felt cold, even fully clothed in his climate-controlled room. It was like the dreadful realization had sucked the bliss clean out of him – but Sasuke was glad for it. Glad to be thinking clearly for a change, instead of floating around on Cloud Nine like a blonde opera singer from a Disney cartoon.

A part of him railed at his logic, insisted that Neji wasn't like that. That Neji was honorable, kind, gentle, honest. But his more familiar feelings dominated over his better ones, and he set his jaw resolutely. He would not be a victim, not anymore.

The knives came on, the brass knuckles cleverly disguised as part of his belt. He would have packed his things too, had the door not swung open just as he was about to pull his bags out from under the bed.

He straightened quickly, and made to turn, but not quickly enough. Warm, strong arms held him, circling him in a band of dreams. It was so easy to lose his earlier resolve, so easy to melt into the tempting heat that was Neji.

So easy to forget that there was no peace for an Uchiha, no haven for an Avenger.

"Stop thinking, Sasuke." Warm breath ghosting over an ear made him shudder. "Just let go, just be with me."

Neji must be a siren in disguise, because Sasuke couldn't find it in himself to resist. Not when his voice whispered wordlessly of home and safety and, if not happiness, at least a quiet kind of joy that could come only from contentment and peace.

I'm such a GIRL.

----

A/N: Very short compared to the previous chapter, I know. And more of a teaser than anything. I promise to dish out plots, plots, and more plots next chapter – as well as involve the other characters more. Hope you guys liked it though. This is kinda just to let you all know that I'm still here and that I WILL be turning this into a multi-part. Cheers!