"Suspension is so worth it mother." I was so happy. Joyful even. I could hear my mum calling up to me, more to herself than to me. She was angry at me, but proud at the same time. I had told her about Bella on Friday afternoon, after the bathroom incident. She had convinced me to go and visit her. Then this morning she'd asked me to invite Bella to dinner.

She was disappointed in my course of action, but proud that I'd stood up for what I believed in. She was convinced that Bella and I were dating. Nothing I said could persuade her otherwise. After hitting Edward which was the most satisfying thing I had ever done, I'd walked Bella and Alice to the cafeteria before going to the admin to turn myself in. I'd been sent home shortly after that. Not before making Bella promise to come to dinner.

As I walked into my bedroom I glanced over at my alarm clock. 4:30. I still had about an hour before I had to go and pick Bella up. I jumped in the shower and turned the heat all the way up. I couldn't get the girl out of my head. I had always thought that she was pretty, but now that I'd seen her smile, a real smile, I thought she was beautiful. I could get lost in her chocolate eyes. They looked like the strongest, richest of coffees.

My intentions toward her were suddenly changing from wanting to be her friend, to wanting to be far more than that. I knew I couldn't rush any of this though, she was emotionally unstable. She went from happy to completely miserable in seconds. Pushing my feelings onto her would probably make her feel even worse.

I threw on some black jeans and my old Ramones t-shirt before slipping on my chucks and heading over to the Swan's house. I was pulling up out the front when I realised Charlie's cruiser wasn't in its usual spot, I hoped that she had gotten in contact with him and was allowed to come over. I ran my hand through my hair as I stepped onto the porch, I was about to knock when the door flew open.

She stood there with a half smile on her face. She was wearing a midnight blue flowing halter-neck top and skin tight blue jeans. Her bandages were off and she'd thrown on possibly half a tonne of bracelets. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail; she'd brushed on some mascara. She looked beautiful.

She began to blush and I realised I was staring. I felt my own cheeks redden as I was caught, I dropped my gaze. "Hey Jazz." My head snapped up at the use of my nickname. I smiled, it was the first time she had said it. "Am I overdressed?" she looked down at herself.

"No, you're perfect." I smiled as she blushed once again. I held out my hand and she took it, I pulled her down the front steps and we jumped in the truck. It may have been my imagination, but I thought things seemed to be tense when we were sitting in the truck, neither of us spoke. I could feel her presence at my side; I could feel the heat radiating from her thigh right next to my hand. I could barely control the urge to put my hands on her again.

I hadn't been able to help myself in biology today; I was quickly becoming addicted to the girl. I felt the need to have her close all of the time. She was getting under my skin, and I liked it. I just didn't know how long I could control myself before I would do something that she wouldn't be ready for.

As we pulled into my driveway I groaned internally, my mum was waiting out the front for us, along with my dad and little brother. Jeez, overkill mother. I shook my head and glanced at Bella, she seemed even more nervous. I squeezed her hand and smiled encouragingly.

My mum stepped forward as we got out of the truck, I walked around to Bella's side and reached for her hand. She stood close by my side, and in some sick, twisted way it made me smile that she was using me to protect her.

"Hello Bella, my name's Deidre; this is my husband Peter, and Jasper's brother Joel." She gestured to everyone in turn then looked back to Bella.

"It's lovely to meet you all," she blushed once again and it made the corners of my mouth lift slightly. My dad nodded slightly and Joel waved.

"Come inside dear and Jasper can show you around." We followed her in and she told us that dinner would be ready in about thirty minutes. I led Bella into the lounge room and then the dining room. As we climbed the stairs so I could show her my room she spoke up.

"I didn't realise that you had a little brother. How old is he?" she was still holding my hand and I began to rub circles on her palm.

"He's ten. Old enough to be annoying," I laughed and she giggled. I showed her my parents' room, Joel's room, and then mine. "Here we are," I opened the door to my now ridiculously tidy bedroom.

"Wow, you really are a musician," she sounded as if she was in shock as she walked over to my keyboard and began to touch the keys.

"Yeah, I like to play. Its fun I suppose." I shrugged, I always felt vulnerable when people asked about my music. I had never played anyone an original.

"Do you think..." she stopped short. I knew what she was going to ask, I smiled. I walked over to her. She was facing me and I stopped right in front of her, I put my hands on her arms and ran them up and down, warming her.

"I'd love to play for you again, darlin'. How about after dinner?" She blushed and nodded. She quickly looked around my room again. I sat down on my bed as she inspected my posters, she looked around curiously and I observed her.

She was a beautiful creature, her forehead would crease in confusion when she didn't recognise a band, her hand would half lift toward each poster but she would drop it before she touched anything. It was then that I saw the cuts on her wrist. I could only see her right wrist clearly, I could see the cut that she'd made on Friday as it was scabbed over and sore looking, I could also see about five or six scars further up her arm. It was my turn to crease my forehead.

She was smiling as she turned to face me so I smoothed my face and returned the smile. She sat on the bed next to me; she was sitting on the edge, hands in her lap, back straight. I was leaning back on one elbow with my legs dangling over the edge. I pulled her back to lay with me. She was looking nervous again.

"Thanks Jazz," she smiled shyly. She wasn't exactly looking at me, more at my chin. I suddenly realised that we were in my room. On my bed. Alone. Jesus.

"What for, darlin'?" I lifted her chin so she was looking my in the eyes. God she had beautiful eyes. I glanced down at her lips, I unconsciously licked my own. It wouldn't be so bad if i just leaned in and kissed her, would it? Friends could kiss friends, right? Not the way you're thinking, Whitlock. I wanted to reach across and pull her tightly to me, pressing my lips hard against hers, running my hands though her hair, i wanted to make her moan again.

"Being my friend and all that, you make me happy," she smiled as if to prove it. Fuck, Whitlock, friends remember?

"You make me happy, too." My mood had dropped, I had been thinking about kissing her. What the hell is wrong with me? This girl trusts me! I lay down flat on my back and looked up at the ceiling.

Ask her, ask her, ask her.

"Bella, I was wondering. What if..."

Knock, knock. "Dinner's ready, kids." I heard my dad on the other side of my door, perfect timing. I shook my head and reached for her hand as I stood. She looked at me questioningly, I shook my head. She squeezed my hand tight as we headed downstairs; I glanced up at her face. She seemed to be a lot happier.

We entered the dining room and I groaned out loud, Bella looked up at me with a confused expression. I just shook my head and held her chair out for her. I took my seat next to her. Joel was sitting across from Bella and my parents took their seats at either end of the table.

The table was full with plates of food. My mother tended to overdo it. There was corn, peas, mashed potato, carrots, broccoli and cauliflower, roast chicken with stuffing, and gravy. There was way too much food. Bella looked a little overwhelmed as my mother asked what vegetables she would like. I watched my father carve the chicken. I looked across at Joel who was staring at Bella.

"Bella?" He looked confused, his eyebrows pulled down and his mouth turned up on one side. Bella looked up and smiled at him.

"Yes, Joel?" She was starting to relax and I was glad that Joel had chosen that moment to begin his silly questions. That is until he asked his question.

"How did you get that nasty cut on your wrist?"