Chapter Three: Zelda and Sheik
I had been growing bored. It was agonizing. Was this place to be no different then my throne in Hyrule? Routine like this is exactly why I had left. Last years competition had been such a blessing that I absolutely had to attend again this year. The chance to completely let go was not something offered to a Princess on a regular basis. We were to be prim, proper, say all the right things, be clean, have impeccable manners, and of course to never ever fight. This place all the rules were flipped. None of them mattered, the lives you left for that glorious year. I remember being so jealous of Link and his ability to come and go from the kingdom as he pleased while I was sat baby sitting. Everyone dependent upon me for advice, for leadership, I have the triforce of wisdom so I should always know what to do. That is what they assumed, my people.
And they were right. I did always know what to do. I knew every conceivable twist, every angle that could be worked to save the world a hundred times over. Everything was shown to me simultaneously, the past, present and future, laid out for me in sequential order. That's the power of the triforce of wisdom that most do not understand. It does not in actuality make me smarter. It shows me what is to come, what I should learn from the past, and all living beings are, to an extent, aware of the present.
The frustrating part of my triforce is that it doesn't show me the answers. It can only give me outcomes, it is then up to me and my own inner strength and judgment to decide what is to be done. Not to say that the triforce isn't helpful, by all means I would be lost without it.
But I was lost with it, trapped by it really.
Until Gannondorf showed up and changed all of that for me.
He came along with his power and depth and uncertainty. He with his triforce enhanced the power of my own while all the time limiting and diluting it. Naruu would try to tell me something, show me a vision, but before it could come clearly into my minds eye I would just see him, blocking my ability to think clearly. Only when I and Link were able to seal him away was I finally able to continue on in peace and the comforted of the benign.
That does not mean, however that I stopped seeing him. I couldn't satisfy my curiosity for him and begged the Great Goddess to show me something more then vague glimpses of the man. He had after all been kind to me as my captor. Telling me stories of his past, promising me that I would still be Princess of Hyrule. He hadn't wanted to destroy it, he too was simply bored, driven nearly to the brink of insanity by the confines of this world. For it is not kind to those with such extraordinary gifts.
I am fairly confident that if I had not been born Princess of Hyrule, I would have been exiled by my own people. That is another story entirely, however.
The Goddess told me that if I wanted so badly to see the feared Gannondorf that I may. She warned me that there would be rules for opening the door between this world and his. These rules had consequences for breaking them. Some so deep and scarring that I would never recover if I were to disobey them.
She told me first I couldn't reach out to touch the Dark King for I would welcome him into the realm of Hyrule by way of doing so.
The second rule was that I must not say Gannon's name, for that would bring about a far greater punishment.
I accepted these and in return she brought me my Gannondorf. He was something in-between a specter and a person standing there before me that night, not looking at all like himself.
"Princess," he said and his voice was like embers. "Have you come to mock me?"
I could tell sarcasm on any tongue, "you are too stubborn and proud. You would just call me childish, I know you too well."
"How lucky am I to have such a lovely woman know me on such an intimate level?" He was smiling at me with his head tilted, displaying sharp canines.
I tried to remain composed.
"Why on earth did you call me to you?"
"I just wanted to talk really."
"Have you had a vision? Do you need help analyzing it, Princess?"
"You may call me Zelda. I brought you here because I want to know what it is like… in the Sacred Realm."
He laughed a weak laugh, his body seemed to want to shake to pieces with the effort, "no you don't Princess," he hissed the last word. I was wounded.
"What do you mean, that is why I brought you here!"
"I don't doubt that."
"Then what don't I want?"
He looked up from under his lashes, fiery red like his hair. His eyes, how gold they were I had forgotten how beautifully exotic and tragic they were. The color seemed to fade from them as he said, "you don't want to know what it's like."
"…I'm sorry. This is not what I wanted."
He had nothing left in him to force a smile, "as tortured, as trapped as you feel here, it is all only that, a feeling. That reality is a distant threat a minor cloud formation briefly covering that brilliant sunlight you take for granted. You have never known darkness like I! You sit here Princess, on your throne as ruler of this beautiful realm and you think yourself so miserable, so sacrificed and self-righteous that you fancy yourself a martyr. You cannot fathom true suffering and if this world is driving you insane with hopelessness then you would not last half as long as I have in the Sacred Realm, Princess."
Before I could stop myself, "I had said it, Gannondorf I'm so sorry."
He smiled at me with that grimace, reaching out his hand and touching me with flesh and blood, I had brought him back.
He stroked my face so familiar, "thank you Zelda."
It was then the Goddess descended, in all her glorious fury tearing open the heavens and burning the ground she landed on. Her presence so close made the air thin and breathing difficult. Her hair fell in coils on the ground and then splintered from her anger forming the beasts that plagued the land thereafter. In her hand was a great sword like a needle so thin and yet strong enough to plunge deep into my heart. This was not my Goddess.
It was his.
I felt the soft hands of darkness taking my mind as I saw her banish Gannondorf back to the Sacred Realm. He was not looking at the goddess but at me, with such regret that it dug hard lines into his face. When Din was through with him she came to me, she spoke in a voice that made what was left of my mind split into pieces.
I should die she had said for breaking such a rule. But, she was merciful, "your people need you."
Instead, the Goddess she made me a compromise. She said that my soul and heart would forever be split and that I would never be restful. She said that were one soul wanted to go the other would resist, whatever one soul wished for the other would pray against, and lastly if one soul loved something the other would hold nothing but contempt in it's heart. She withdrew the sword from my chest driving it through my skull, dividing the hemisphere of my brain before flying back to the heavens.
This happened all a week before the first competition. When I saw Gannondorf again, it was true. I had been split. I was happy to see him, but whenever I got close Sheik, my alter, he would force us apart.
I did not want to be hurt anymore, but I in turn didn't want him to hurt. He seemed so dismayed last competition at how I would almost religiously push him away while crying for his attention. I would have to tell him this time around, tell him that we could never be together thanks to this curse.
How funny that trying to be near him to begin with is what would pull us permanently apart.
So, for the past month I had been trying to tell him, but of course my wishes were contrary to what Sheik wanted. He wanted his morbid game to continue for as long as possible. This cat and mouse affair. Or at least he really did not want me to speak to Gannondorf. Finally I decided that it would just be easiest to avoid everyone and everything. To keep to myself had been the preferable method of living and staying sane for nearly two weeks.
But I had been growing bored of this.
Until Halloween that is.
The Master Hand had come to us that morning with some announcements.
"Tonight as you all very well know is all Hallows Eve. It is my wish that tonight there be a grand party held in the ballroom. This will be a mandatory affair, I feel it should be this way. You all really should socialize more often and this will help you all to get to know each other!"
Everyone was there to hear this. Even Sonic was up from his hospital bed, the only evidence that he had been in a fight the other day a bandage around his left eye. Some of the guests were already expressing their disapproval of the idea.
"Man I dunno, I'm kinda hung over form Pit's wild party yesterday," Fox was rubbing his forehead and temples, wincing whenever anyone spoke too sharply.
"Yeah, and I just plain don't want to go," Ness said this.
"That is all very unfortunate but you must go! It will be so fun you guys just wait!! I have another surprise for all of you. Women please draw a piece of paper form this hat and men from this one."
All the men jumped up at once tying to get the first chance to see what the surprise was. They were all very high strung, curious people these men here. Except Gannondorf, he waited back for everyone else to disperse for the initial chaos to settle. Only then did he rise and make his way towards the hand.
"What the does Rumplestiltskin mean?" Mario said this.
"The big bad wolf," Ike was the first to realize. "It's fairy tales, isn't it?"
The Master Hand said nothing. Although the answer was clear he seemed to be trying to drag out whatever suspense was left for as long as he could.
"The Beast?" Pit was deeply confused.
"Hahaha I'm Blue Beard all be envious!" Everyone turned in disgust. It was sad to admit but Wario would make an excellent Blue Beard.
"Puss in Boots?" Sonic looked up at the Master Hand, "say it ain't so?" Sonic was the second to last in line.
Gannondorf took the last slip of paper between his fingers reading it under his breath.
No one but I who was paying great attention to him heard what he whispered,
"Prince Charming. Cute." He uttered this last bit much louder as he shoved the piece of forsaken paper into a garbage bin.
"Ladies?" The Master Hand picked up the hat very gentlemanly and brought it to each of us.
Peach was first. She messed the paper in the hat for a bit humming to herself while she made a selection.
"Little Red Riding Hood!" She said jubilantly.
The master hand brought me the hat. I only briefly fingered the papers before withdrawing my hand with a selection.
"Cinderella?" I had to consciously forbid my eyes from wandering to his.
"Snow White?" Jigglypuff was livid.
"The Frog Princess? To match my brother the Frog Prince," Nana laughed.
"Sleeping Beauty, you are kidding aren't you?" Samus mocked.
"No, dear Samus quite serious. Now remember this party is mandatory and so are your costumes."
"Shit!" Was the overall consensus of the group.
"But how are we gonna have the costumes done by tonight?" Samus was still staring at her slip of paper in disgust.
It was then Luigi a normally shy and quiet man spoke loudly to the group, "Please let me make the costumes!!"
"Huh?" Everyone stared at him in surprise.
"I uh, use to be a club kid in the eighties and you've seen those ridiculous get-ups. I'm a master costume maker. Please, I would be delighted to make the costumes for everyone. It would bring back such good memories," Luigi ended the sentence a look of nostalgia playing on his face.
"You were a club kid in the eighties?" Fox asked dumfounded.
"What did you think I was doing all that time? I mean I wasn't in any games, I needed something to do."
No one dared ask further into Luigi's bizarre past.
"Well, everyone give me your measurements and I'll get right on it."
We lined up then for the second time to allow Luigi to take down our sizes.
"Well, I'm off to make beautiful costumes."
And they were beautiful. That night everyone looked marvelous. How Luigi was able to finish 35 costumes in nearly eight hours was anyone's guess but we were all grateful. My dress was a sky blue that shimmered when ever light hit it I wore glass slippers as was expected and my hair up in a bun a few strains falling from it in ripples. Luigi had plastered my face with make-up, blues and purples mainly and had been able to make even my eyes look bluer then they actually were. Peach's outfit was quite scandalous, Luigi openly expressed that it was his favorite creation of the night. She was wrapped tightly in a red dress that had slits up both side, high enough to see her garter belt and petticoat. She had large lipstick red platform shoes on, Luigi had confessed that they had once been his and that he had worn them on several occasions though we all tried to ignore these remarks. She of course was wearing the infamous hood and had a basket full of fruit shots made with large chunks of peaches and watermelons. Kirby who was Robin Hood, running around with a bow and arrow and Link's hat, trailed Peach around all night begging and cooing for the watermelon.
"No Kirby," she would try to reason in vain. "These watermelons aren't for kids!"
"Puoy!" Kirby would reach his hands up in protest.
"NO! Kirby! Kirby come back here!" Kirby had sucked in the basket into his mouth and had taken off at a full sprint. Peach tried running after him but was unable to catch up in those shoes.
I giggled at the sight of it all. By this point I had had a few drinks not so many to even give me a head change, but enough to make everything a little funnier.
I looked around at the others. Fox and Falco made superb Tweedledee and Tweedledumb and Jigglypuff was an adorable Snow White. Luigi had specially made a black wig to fit her and put her in small white high heels. Everything had been thought out wonderfully to match every person's body type and height; he really had done a spectacular job.
The men I saw who had excellent costumes were Sonic as Puss in Boots. Luigi had been able to fit him with leather boots to is knees and a feathered hat. Somehow he had even found a sword lying around. Ike was a perfect Big Bad Wolf and although he and Peach were supposed to be a pair, Sonic was making getting close to Peach very difficult for all but himself.
I was jealous of Peach really, to have somewhere want to be her one and only that badly. It depressed me so that I would, could never have what she did.
Then of course there was Gannondorf dressed as Prince Charming. He didn't look too different, not in my opinion at least. He had always been my Prince Charming. He was sitting by himself in all his doom and mystery, drinking by the bar. Now was the time, I thought. If I was to ever get close to him it was right now.
"Bartender, may I have another?" I held out my empty glass. I didn't know why I was so cordial to the bartender he was a robot after all. My scruples were purely instinctual now.
"P-puoy *hiccup*," Kirby sat next to me, tittering precariously on his stool.
He had swallowed the watermelon shots.
"Are you okay Kirby?"
He shook his head, "puoy…," he laid his head down on the bar.
Darn, I thought. I can't just leave Kirby here.
Suddenly Kirby got up form the stool, walking in a manner native to a redead back to his room.
"You're going to bed Kirby?"
He nodded his head.
"Sleep well Kirby."
"P-p *hiccup*…meh…"
Before I was able to make a move, Gannondorf had sat down next to me, "he going to be okay?"
I felt Sheik in me, trying to claw my way up throat and dominate the situation.
Don't talk to him. remember what he did to you, please don't let him fool you. He just wants the kingdom, his compassion is a façade.
I tried not to listen, but he was persistent. I stood up to leave.
Good, leave that evil man there, break his heart like he broke yours.
Gannondorf grabbed my sleeve, come on this is starting to piss me off. "I mean what happened to make you hate me so?"
I couldn't hold him; Sheik was burning out of my every pore. I wrestled with him, my mind two tornados dancing.
Please Sheik let me handle this!
No! You can't! The reason we are in this mess is because of your weakness and his tricks. I have to do this for you!!
I beg you sheik, it was too late he was much too strong.
I could see what he was doing, hear what he was thinking, but I had no control over the hurtful things he was going to say.
"You need to leave us alone Gannondorf. We don't want you anywhere near us, do you understand?"
Gannondorf looked into our eyes, Sheiks eyes and laughed, "it's been a long time. Is it you that is so against the Princess being happy?"
"I know what's best for her and always keep her health and safety at the forefront to my mind something that you never do nor never will."
Sheik please!
Shut up Zelda, this is what you've been wanting all along isn't? The strength to say goodbye, well I'm giving it to you.
Not like this Sheik. Just not like this…
"Let me talk to Zelda," Gannondorf said grabbing onto Sheiks arm. "Let me see what she thinks of you butting in all the time."
"You're sick. You prey on weak and lonely girls like Zelda. I know what happened in your castle. She doesn't remember but I do! You don't care about her you just want something to control."
Please Sheik!! Stop!
Zelda, he can only destroy. He will never love you like I love you.
"You have no idea what you're talking about, boy. Though you may remember you weren't there. You speak so assured of what you know, though you know nothing. Bring the Princess back!!"
Sheik what don't I remember?
It's too horrible Zelda I can't tell you.
"Bring the Princess back, or I will go in there and get her myself."
Sheik I'm coming back and there's nothing you can do to stop me.
Let him try to get you, I'd like to see that!!
NO!! Sheik, I could feel another presence in my mind as Gannondorf tried to push Sheik deep into my unconscious.
HHAHAHAHAHA, he can't get rid of me Zelda, I will always be here. He's wasting so much energy. That idiot!!
Sheik stopped laughing, "Sheik?" I was back in control, "Gannon what did you do to him?"
"I just quieted him, for awhile too. At least that's what I was aiming for."
"What did you do? What did you do to Sheik?"
"I told you…"
"But how? How did you do it?"
"He's just sleeping really."
"What was he talking about? What can't I remember?"
"I'm not going to tell you that! Not now you're way too upset for anything good to come of you knowing."
"Gannondorf I have the right…," it was then a loud voice over an intercom, interrupting our argument.
"Welcome brawlers to the first annual Halloween House party!" It was the Master Hands voice. "I do hope that so far you are enjoying yourselves," there was cheering form the crowd.
"I'M DRUNK!!" Someone yelled out.
"So I see," the Master Hand continued, "since the party is well on its' way I believe this would be the perfect time to play some games, how does that sound?"
Everyone in the crowd started cheering again.
"Good! Good! I am very glad to see everyone in such high spirits! This first game is called Trick or Treat and in order to play I will need three volunteers!"
"Pit should go!!"
"Yeah! Pit get up there!!"
Pit looked around a smiling a shy smile, "uh…okay sure? What do I have to do?"
"Just stand center stage. Now who wants to be the next two?"
"I do!!" Jigglypuff was running towards center stage before anyone could stop her.
"Alright then who wants to be the last person?"
"What the hell do we get if we win?" Sonic boldly asked.
"Come and find out."
Sonic was on stage, so quickly no one saw him move.
"Let's get this started!"
"Alright Brawlers! Do you see the balloons above you?" We all turned towards the ceiling, collectively noticing the hundreds above us.
"That's a lot of helium!"
"Inside each balloon is either a trick or a treat. It's up to you three to find as many treats as possible before the time runs out. You have thirty seconds on the clock. Ready and GO!"
Pit was in air first easily flying his way into the mass of balloons. Sonic and Jigglypuff had to be a little more creative. Sonic was able to bounce himself off a couple walls to become airborne and then ran himself over the balloons popping ones that looked promising. Jigglypuff asked for help from the audience and was able to ride up on Meta Knights back.
After this I lost interest turning back to Gannondorf, "tell me!" I hissed.
"Another time, when you are not so drunk! When you are not so disturbed!"
"I'm not drunk!" I went to slap him but missed miserably nearly falling to my knees with the effort.
He caught me.
"Not drunk, huh?"
I was suddenly aware of just how much I had had, at least half a bottles worth before I had mustered up the courage to even approach him. Then that extra shot just before he sat next to me. I was hopelessly intoxicated. My mind working fine enough but having no control of my body could only sit by and watch it behave in such a terrible manner, stumbling around like a jellyfish.
Gannondorf finally grabbed hold of me and steadied my body against his. I clutched him like the cornerstone of my foundation.
"How about we just sit down and watch the competition? How does that sound?"
I just melted against him, whatever he wanted to do was absolutely fine with me. Not much had changed from so long ago I was still unable to fight him, drunk or not. Nothing had changed.
"Alright Brawlers time is up!! Please return to the stage with the treats you found."
I looked up from Gannon's chest to see the stage of brawlers. People in the crowd were laughing.
They all looked to be covered in different forms of goo and slime.
Pit's costume was matted down with what appeared to be slowly solidifying glue but smelled like pickles and Sonic had lost a boot somewhere in the mess and was dyed a satin pink color.
Jigglypuff seemed unscathed, other then her hair which was plastered backward as if it had gone threw a wind tunnel.
"I will need three more volunteers to come up and count the treats each person has."
Ike ran, rather was pushed up on stage, "he can count for Pit!!"
Pit blushed looking down at someone who I couldn't see, giving them a small smile of appreciation.
"Snake wants to count for Sonic!!"
"No I don't!!"
"Yes, you do come on!!!"
"No I really don't fuck!!" Snake was also forced on stage.
"This'll be funny!" Fox yelled.
Without a word of coaxing or even having to be shoved to the stage, Meta Knight stepped forward to count for Jigglypuff.
The ecstatic look in jigglypuff's eyes I could see, from across the ballroom.
"Alright feel free to start counting now!"
After a few minutes, "twelve!" Ike yelled on Pit's behave.
"Come on old man how many do I have?!" Sonic was yelling at Snake. Causing him to rush then loose count, he started the tedious process over again.
"You lost count? Come on how hard can it be?"
"Fucking hedgehog!! Fifteen! Happy you have fifteen! Goddamn!"
"Yeah, Goddamn is right! How long does it take to count to fifteen?"
"You little…!! Fucking hedgehog!" A couple of people had to jump on stage, diving between Snake and Sonic saving the latter.
"Thirteen," Meta Knight waved jigglypuff's treats in the air as testament to what he had just spoken.
"Beautiful! It seems we have a winner! Everyone give it up for Sonic who has just won himself a prize, a dinner for two at the Ambience restaurant in the nearby city of Mountain View."
"WHOO HOO!! Can I take whoever I want?"
"Yes, of course. Shall I call anyone from your home?"
"Nope that's not needed. I wanna take Peach!!"
No one looked at Peach but firstly to Mario, waiting for him to explode. He didn't.
"It's not up to me," he shrugged his shoulders. "Peach is a free woman with no obligations."
Sonic's smile was purely malicious, the crowd turned to Peach who was dumfounded. The tension was static electricity in the air.
"I-I sure why not?" She smiled at the crowd who was gasping for air having held their breathe too long.
"Really?? YESSSSSSSSS!!!"
Jigglypuff and Pit looked positively dismal.
Gannondorf whispered in my ear, "I wish I had entered. Then I could have had you all to myself for at least a night."
There was a huge explosion. Everyone hit the floor as a quake rocked the ground and rumbled the windows out of their frames.
Gannondorf had thrown himself on me, there was glass all over him but there was not a mark on either of us. He picked me up, "are you alright Princess."
I was sober, the alcohol shocked out of me, "I believe so?" I stood up to see what exactly had happened. One half of the ballroom was in complete chaos. Glass form the windows covered the group like a light falling of snow. The greatest spectacle was seeing who had attempted to save who.
Ike was holding Pit's body to his, creating for him a shelter from which Pit seemed reluctant to move. Meta Knight had encased Jigglypuff in his wings, his sword was in his hand at she ready. Ness had gone for Nana and Lucas for Popo. Sonic had made it to Princess Peach in astounding time, holding her much the same way Ike had Pit.
Samus had the shaken Pikachu in her arms and was trying to talk him down.
"It's okay Pikachu, shhh. Honey you're fine!!"
"Chu!"! Pikachu buried its' head deep into Samuses chest, shivering wildly.
And Gannon had me. We were all the perfect picture of the romance that was blooming.
"What the hell was that?" Snake who had jumped under his cardboard box asked.
The master hand was above us, "I will check the damage, but from the sounds of it, it came from the girl's wing. Do hold on for a minute."
"Gladly," Sonic tightened his grip on the Princess.
"I'm fine Sonic really!"
The Master Hand was back before the pair could finish arguing.
He had awful news for the lot of us.
"It seems that Kirby mistook the furnace for something edible."
"Oh my God is he okay?"
"He is just fine, a bit singed but nothing that won't or can't be fixed. It seems that he swallowed the furnace, and then the furnace being a hardy meal fell asleep, leaving the gas from it to leak into and fill the entire basement which as you ladies know is located directly under your rooms."
"Oh dear," Peach muttered.
"When Kirby finally woke, he dragged himself up the stairs and being so very economically friendly he shut off the light which was enough to spark a fuse and blow the whole girls wing to bits and pieces."
"Holy crap!"
"My thoughts exactly Nana."
"What happened to all our stuff?" Samus was livid.
"Due to the industrial strength steel that all your belongings seem to be made of nothing of yours was damaged."
Samus breathed a sigh of relief.
"For the rest of you, I'm afraid everything was destroyed."
Peach and I looked at each other then at our own outfits, was this all we had left?
"You don't mean to say that we have to wear this? What about the rest of the year."
"I will reimburse you all however much need be so that you may buy a new wardrobe for the year ahead. Peach I assume on your outing with Sonic that you can stop by some stores to buy some clothing and personals."
"Sonic would that be alright with you?"
"I would be an idiot to say no."
"What about me?"
"Zelda you may at anytime in the next couple of days before the second fight to buy yourself whatever you need."
"Thank you."
"Same for you Nana. You may also bring escorts or you may go together I don't mind either way. Now as to the new rooming situation…"
"Oh God thank you…," someone whispered with sincere pleasure.
"While we rebuild the Woman's wing we will have to make new, temporary living situation. You girls can decide with whom you will want to room."
"My brother and Ness," Nana said. She was smiling with happiness at the thought. It was clear to all that she had a little innocent crush on Ness.
"Peach you can room with me," it was clear to all that Sonic didn't have a little innocent crush on Peach.
"Um, I think I'd like to room with Mario and Luigi, actually."
Sonic looked at her as if someone had just dug twelve inch needles through his heart.
"If that's what you really want," Mario was less then excited.
"Jigglypuff and Meta Knight both are looking for a room would someone be so kind as to let them both stay with them."
"They can stay with me and Ike," Pit smiled at Jigglypuff. "I think it'd be fun!"
"You're so sweet Pit!" Jigglypuff gave the angel a running hug, "thank you!!"
"Samus you may room with Pikachu and Yoshi if you wish."
"Yeah, that would be awesome."
"Zelda were would you like to stay?"
I looked around at my options. Marth and Link seemed plausible. Never Wario, Ness and Popo already had their new addition; Sonic looked too wounded to allow another girl so quickly into his life. Ike and Pit had their hands full; as did Mario and Luigi, Fox and Falco where always pulling pranks on people I didn't want to be their primary target. Kirby and King Dedede, what do I have in common with them. Red and Snake both were a little too hot to trot form my taste. And then there was Gannondorf and his roommate Bowser, two villains in desperate need of a Princess.
"I'll stay with Gannondorf and Bowser."
Whatever part of Sheik that was still awake roused violently in me. I heard screeching so terrible and animalistic, that it couldn't be coming from him. It was something else, something much more malignant and growing like cancer. Starting from the pit of my stomach and working its way up through my veins, into my lungs and crawling into my heart circulating there waiting for its' opportunity to tear it open and from my corpse, escape.
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