Notes: Still flipping out over The Tap-Out Job. It was awsome and I feel like my little verse with Eliot is weirdly brushing close to cannon (I mean seriously, the scene where he "snaps" is exactly what I've always imagined him going Black Knight is like). So um yeah... now for somthing totally different.
Note: Gold stars for whoever makes up a good punchline for the summary line.

Concerning Non-Dates, Unattended Gay-Bars, and Kick Ass Fairy Boys
An ex-insurance investigator and his retrival specalist boyfriend walk into a bar...

So maybe it wasn't a good idea to just drop into some random bar.

Sure he had Eliot with him, which meant unless the bar just happened to be a meeting place for the Mexican drug cartel it wasn't like there was any threat to their persons. Maybe it was that Eliot was actually looking for a fight, you could never really tell with Eliot on a Friday night.

If it was they might have to have a talk about looking for a fight when on a date.

Okay, so it wasn't really a date as far as dates go. A spur of the moment decision to go out to a bar instead of spending yet another night in their apartment hardly counted as dateworthy. When two people were living together deciding to go somewhere together wasn't exactly date qualifications.

And if Nate was trying to distance himself from a concept he associated with bad chick flicks and awkward college days then hopefully Eliot had the sense not to call this a date either.

So a not date to a bar had been prefaced by a not quite spoken agreement to keep the whole date behavior to a minimum. They'd drunk beers, played pool, and managed not to let the subtext of their conversation get way out of hand. Heck, they'd both had an amusing time fielding the responses of girls who didn't put two and two together.

But they were drinking, which meant as the night wore on the non date behavior was slowly migrating toward "we're living together in the friendly touchy sense" behavior. Which was around the time it occurred to Nate that they probably would have been better off biting the bullet and going to a gay bar.

It wasn't really that much of a shock to either of them when some biker guy who looked like he thought himself quite tough tried to take the table they were playing pool at. The verbal vomit of slurs didn't exactly rile either of them more than to cause Nate to ask Eliot. "Do you feel like you're back in Junior High all of a sudden?"

"It's middle school these days Nate." Eliot answered off hand, eyes never leaving the guy but still pointedly unriled. "But I get ya point. The usual names." He paused raising an eyebrow at the guy almost appraisingly. "The denial."

A couple of the guys friends wandered over, renewing the bikers confidence now that they outnumbered Eliot and Nate. A couple of lewd comments were met with shrugs and Eliot taking his shot. It almost surprised Nate to see Eliot taking it without even getting a little pissed, until he saw the smirk on the man's face.

So it seemed Nate wasn't the only one who realized not responding was the most infuriating course of action. Of course knowing Eliot he was just waiting for one to take a swing.

"Did you choose this bar on purpose Eliot?" Nate asked, ignoring the men crowding further into their space.

Eliot turned, giving his little grin. "Now why'd ya ask that?" Damn Eliot and that damn grin of his short-circuiting his brain every damn time.

Nate missed the comment that caused Eliot's demeanor to change. His voice took on an almost friendly tone, putting down his pool cue and shaking his head. "Ah now see fellas, that's not really a good idea you've got there." He cracked his knuckles. "You keep callin' me a fairy and I'm gonna make sure when they roll ya inta ER later that they put down you had your ass kicked by a Fairy Boy." The easy going air of a night with Nate disappeared. It took a half second for Nate to determine it was a blow off some steam and get in some blows thing not a lost his cool duck and cover thing.

Eliot had the first one down before any of them could react.

Nate knew he could step in. He could help Eliot take on the three guys who were trying to rescue their buddy from a sound beating.

But Eliot looked like he was having a good time so Nate got another round of beers and paid their tab instead. He didn't worry about the ruckus Eliot was causing. Places like this had a policy that the fight looser paid the tab.

By the time Nate returned with their drinks Eliot was watching the last of the four limp away with a almost frightening smile.

"My hero." Nate commented dryly, handing Eliot his beer.

Eliot just smiled again, grabbed Nate's collar and pulled him in for a kiss.

Wasn't like anyone else was going to be bothering them now.

By the time they'd got home and only just made it into the bedroom Nate was beginning to think a bar wasn't such a bad place for a non-date after all.