A/N: Many, many thanks to DaniWilder for all of her suggestions and the Beta. Gracias, JJ

Dis-Harmony

Chapter Two

Worth Fighting For

"Unscheduled offworld activation!" The alarm blared and Chuck's voice echoed through the tower. Woolsey hurried from his office to stand near Chuck's workstation. "It's Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay."

"Let them in."

A few moments later they heard loud male voices in the Gate Room and went to peer over the rail. Rodney and Sheppard were having an argument.

"Rodney, would you please just let it go? I told you, I took a shower before the service as you suggested, another before bed last night and again this morning."

"Then why do I still smell it?" McKay was wrinkling his nose.

"I don't…friggin'…know!" The last word echoed off the walls of the Gate Room and captured the attention of everyone in the vicinity, including Woolsey.

"Is there a problem, Colonel?"

Rodney and Sheppard looked up to see the expedition commander staring down at them. "Nothing I can't handle." His words were for Woolsey but he was looking at Rodney.

"How was your trip?"

Rodney was rocking back and forth on his heels looking up at Woolsey with a smug expression. "We had a couple of really great meals at the queen's table, the funeral was long and extremely boring and we slept in rooms bigger than most people's homes. Oh, and Harmony asked me to be king."

Woolsey's eyes were wide behind his wire frame glasses. "Perhaps you should come up to my office."

The two men climbed the staircase and crossed the bridge to the commander's office. Woolsey invited them to sit then looked from one to the other waiting for them to elaborate. "Well?"

Sheppard and Rodney shared a look. The Colonel rolled his eyes and looked away.

"He's just upset that my new job as king is a major advancement while his new position as the head of the military is a lateral transfer."

"Please, just start at the beginning, Doctor." He sniffed the air then shook his head and tried to ignore the strange scent that suddenly invaded his office.

Rodney recounted the conversation that he and Sheppard had with Harmony on the second night of their stay with a self-satisfied and haughty expression. All the while Woolsey just sat there in his chair with his arms crossed and his face impassive.

When the physicist finally trailed off, Woolsey continued to stare at a point six inches in front of his nose thinking. "You have gotten yourself in a bit of a pickle, haven't you, Dr. McKay?"

"How do you figure?"

"Just for the sake of argument, let's say that you have decided to decline her offer. What would happen to the trade agreement we have with her people? Will she be so offended that she cuts off any and all contact with Atlantis or will she just pout for a few days and let it go?"

Both men just stared at Woolsey without blinking. They hadn't even considered the ramifications of declining.

Rodney looked anxious. "I-I-If they cut off all contact with us, how will we be able to protect them from the Wraith and the rogue Genii?"

"I'll contact Her Majesty myself to see what their procedures are for declining their very generous, uh, offers. What time is it there?"

Sheppard checked his watch. "It's early evening. They should be sitting down to dinner right about now."

"Yeah, Harmony and Flora are probably picking out their wedding gowns and bridesmaids dresses at this very moment."

"Rodney!!"

He raised his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. I'll stop…for now."

After the men left Woolsey gathered up his tablet PC and crossed the bridge one more time. He went to Chuck and said, "I'm going to work the remainder of the day in my quarters because it smells like a wet llama in my office. Would you please have someone in to clean and have it liberally sprayed with air freshener?"

"Yes, sir. Right away." As Chuck turned away to forward the request he heard him sniffing the air. He smelled it, too, and it wasn't at all pleasant but he hadn't wanted to say anything.

"Oh, and have them take care of Ops and the Gate Room, too."

The Next Afternoon

Sheppard approached the table on the patio where Ronon, Rodney, Lorne and Teyla were already seated. As he passed occupied tables he didn't see that the women were wrinkling their noses in disgust.

He greeted his friends and took the only empty chair, the one next to Teyla. She sniffed. "John, what are you eating? It smells like…"

"A wet animal? Yeah, I know. And it's not my food. It's me and I don't know what it is. I've showered more than a few times but it keeps coming back. I borrowed some scented shower gel and ended up smelling like a wet animal eating a melon."

Rodney was wearing a smug expression, the same one he'd worn since he'd recovered from the shock of Harmony asking him to be her husband. "Maybe it's a symptom of the jealousy he feels because she asked me to be king and not him."

"I've already told you, I'm not jealous! Why would I envy you because a 16 year-old girl asked you to marry her?"

"Well, she was originally" he made finger quotes "in love with you then turned her allegiance to me when I saved her life."

Teyla stood abruptly, taking up her tray. "I am sorry, John. I must go. The smell is…overwhelming."

He nodded his understanding as she hurried away. The Athosian greeted several of her friends including Jennifer. The doctor had started to join Team Sheppard but the odd smell forced her to sit a few tables away though she did blatantly eavesdrop on their conversation. Rodney's back was to her so he didn't edit his remarks. Her head snapped up at his next comment.

"You know, when I become king of M84-414…" he always emphasized the word king, "…I'm going to have an in-depth look at their science and technology. You know, I could singlehandedly bring about an all-encompassing technological renaissance with my vast knowledge of everything about, well, everything. And just think what you could do for their military, John. In a few years they, we could be a Pegasus superpower." He didn't see Jennifer jump up and run away.

"Their queen is only 16?" Ronon asked.

Sheppard rolled his eyes. "Just about. Rodney, you aren't seriously considering taking her up on her offer, are you?"

"Oh, don't be obtuse. Of course I'm not actually considering it. She's a teenage girl, for goodness sake. But like the losers in the Oscars, it was an honor just to be asked. Why can't you just let me enjoy it for a couple of days? A-A-At least until we figure out how to gracefully decline without destroying our trade agreement with the Royal Pain and her horny sister. Speaking of which..."

"No!"

"No?"

Sheppard was way beyond frustrated. "No, for the ten thousandth time! I slept alone the second night!"

* * * * *

Jennifer was so shocked at Rodney's words that she jumped up and pushed her way through a group of diners headed into the Mess Hall. She left her tray without finishing her meal bent on catching up with Teyla. Fortunately, her friend hadn't gotten far. They had a quick whispered conversation then together they stepped into a transport and exited in the tower.

"Chuck, where's Mr. Woolsey?"

"He and a security detail went to M84-414 to talk with the queen. He should be back…" an alarm went off and he turned to his workstation, "immediately. It's him. Shutting down the shield." The Stargate flickered and moments later Richard Woolsey and two armed Marines appeared.

Jennifer went to the railing. "Mr. Woolsey, we need to speak to you right away!" She indicated herself and Teyla.

He stopped and looked up at the two women solemnly. "That's good because I need to see the two of you as well." They waited outside his office, followed him in then sat without an invitation. He gave them a quick rundown on the situation and his discussion with Queen Harmony regarding the declining of her offers to Sheppard and Rodney.

"So the only way for them to reject the offer without grievously insulting the crown is for them to either already be married or for someone to challenge each of the women for their hands?" The women exchanged a look and a nod.

"Yes, that is why I wanted to see the two of you. Dr. Keller…"

"I accept!"

"Pardon?"

"I will challenge Harmony for Rodney's hand." The medical doctor stated for the record.

"And I would be honored to fight for the hand of John Sheppard." Teyla's gaze on his was unwavering.

The commander sighed. "You understand that I would never order you to do this."

"Yes, sir. But Rodney…and John are worth fighting for." Jennifer was resolute. She would not allow the man she loved to become the consort of a teenage queen. "So, what does this challenge entail?"

Woolsey called up the information on his tablet PC and they spent the next few minutes talking strategy.

According to Harmony and Flora, the man whom the women will be fighting over is not to know that a challenge has been issued for his hand. To abide by this edict, Rodney and John would not be told what was happening until the situation had been brought to a satisfactory conclusion.

* * * * *

"Mr. Woolsey! Mr. Woolsey! Could we have a few moments of your time?"

Richard Woolsey turned at the sound of Radek Zelenka's voice. Behind him was most of McKay's senior staff, all with arms crossed and angry, disgruntled expressions. "Of course, Doctor. What can I do for all of you?"

"It is Dr. McKay. He has become even more…unpleasant since his return from M84-414. We are continually being reminded that he has been asked to be their king. He was insufferable before but now…"

The commander sighed and rolled his eyes. "Yes, I know. I'm very sorry. Rest assured that we are working to remedy the situation as we speak. If you would please just be a little patient and try to ignore him like you usually do, it would be greatly appreciated."

"We will try, but it has become nearly intolerable! Somehow he manages to insert a reference to his possible new status into every conversation. And that's the least of it."

Woolsey clasped his hands together in front of him. "If you and your staff could see your way to…persevering for at least another couple of weeks, I think I could be persuaded to, uh, provide an additional…incentive." This pronouncement achieved its purpose. He had their undivided attention.

"You have piqued our interest." Radek pushed his glasses back up his nose. "What sort of…incentive did you have in mind?"

"We can discuss that in more detail after the situation with Dr. McKay has been resolved but I promise, we will come to an agreement that would be beneficial to all interested parties."

Radek had a quick whispered conference with his staff then turned back to Woolsey. "Agreed. You will hear no more complaints from the science and research department."

"Thank you."

* * * * *

Jennifer looked at herself in the mirror with misgiving. Teyla's face was reflected next to hers and their eyes met. "I don't know, Teyla. Are you sure this is what I should be wearing for this challenge?"

"Yes. These items are made from a fabric my people make that is similar to, I do not remember the name. It is a material that draws moisture away from the body during physical exertions."

"Coolmax."

"Yes. It is form-fitting, comfortable and does not restrict movement."

"Okay. You're the expert. Will we be able to get in a few practice sessions before we make the formal challenge?"

Teyla walked to the bed and picked up a set of Bantos rods which she handed to Jennifer. "Of course. We will begin tonight and have workouts as often as possible before we make the challenge. It is mandatory that we make our declaration at least three days before the start of the next lunar cycle. That will give us ten days to make you the greatest female warrior that M84-414 has ever seen."

Jennifer sat on the side of the bed in defeat. "Yeah, like that's going to happen. I couldn't even vanquish a Wraith that wanted to feed on me. Rodney had to shoot him. Harmony will be fighting for the love of a man and that can be a greater motivator than hunger." She sighed in resignation.

Teyla put a hand on her shoulder. "Then love is what we will use to motivate you."

"Excuse me?"

"You love Rodney. This fight will literally be for his heart, his love, which you already have. He just needs to see that he has yours in return."

She blushed and looked away. "Is it that obvious?"

"To me it is, but then my powers of observation are superior to most. What time shall we meet?"

"I'm on night duty all this week so how about 1900? We can have dinner afterwards and talk, uh, strategy."

"I will be there…with bells on." Jennifer laughed and hugged the Athosian.

* * * * *

Ten days later, exactly three days before the beginning of the next local lunar cycle, Jennifer, Teyla, Woolsey, Lorne and his team made their way to the gates of the castle. The sentries were not inclined to allow them entrance until Woolsey declared that they would remain in the settlement until they were allowed to speak with the queen.

Flora saw the commotion, spoke briefly with Harmony and the Atlanteans were granted an audience. Harmony, her back rigid and tense, seated herself on the throne with Flora at her side.

"Please state your business, Mr. Woolsey. There are still many preparations to be made for Harmony's birthday celebration as well as the betrothal ceremonies that will take place immediately afterward." Flora stated. Both women knew what was going on but protocol had to be observed.

Woolsey made a small bow. "Your Majesty, I present to you Jennifer Keller and Teyla Emmagan." They also made a bow. Each was dressed in their uniforms and carried a duffle which they sat at their feet. "They wish to speak to you and your sister."

Jennifer stepped forward with a confidence she didn't feel and looked Harmony in the eye. In keeping with the traditions of the settlement, she stated formally, "I am Jennifer Keller, daughter of Grace and Jacob. I…challenge you, Queen Harmony, for the hand of Rodney McKay."

Teyla came to stand next to the medical doctor, piercing Flora with her dark gaze. "I am Teyla Emmagan, daughter of Tagaan and Torren. And Flora, sister to the queen, I challenge you for the hand of John Sheppard."

TBC