Disclaimer: As always Naruto verse isn't mine. None of the characters belong to me in any way shape or form. I just enjoy tweaking with them and making them do things they do not ever do in Kishimoto's world. Reviews are welcome but please remember this is an AU story and Naruto is a girl in this fic. Nor is Kakashi as old in this fic as he is in canon. When I looked up his personal information there was no real reason for him to have to be the age he's listed as being so I reworked his timeline to make him younger while still allowing for all the hallmarks that make him who he is. Therefore in this story he begins at age 22 and progresses to 23. Live with the difference.
The Honeymoon Mission
by The Mother Rose
Chapter Three:
Over the next few weeks Naruto continued to do the missions for his team and Kakashi continued to let the orange wearing boy know it would end as soon as he told him what he wanted to know. Naruto continued to tell him, loudly, vocally and in many different ways to go to hell and exactly what he could do with himself once he got there. Then he'd take off to do the missions.
He'd yell after Naruto he'd only go there if he took the blond with him. He never noticed he was showing up for the team meets closer and closer to the times he told them to meet him. Nor did he notice he was taking more care with his appearance and looking more alive and aware than he had in years. Kakashi was a lot more interested in his stubborn orange wearing student than he thought he was letting on. Though he still wanted to know what Naruto was hiding from him he wasn't really trying to find out anymore. He was a lot more into the game the two of them were playing than he was into discovering the answer to the puzzle that was Uzumaki Naruto. Every time Naruto told him to go to hell the silver haired jounin would grin a little bit more and that was being noted by more than one person in the village.
Sakura did nothing but pant after the Uchiha and a small swamp was beginning to form in the spot she normally chose for her drooling over him. The aforementioned Uchiha worked himself into the ground trying to refine what he already knew to a fine detail since Kakashi wasn't really interested in teaching him anything new these days. But both genin were noticing how much attention Kakashi was giving Naruto. Both knew it wasn't anything Naruto was really doing and there wasn't anything he could really do any differently. Kakashi was chasing Naruto. Naruto wasn't chasing Kakashi. So they shrugged and watched from the sidelines as their teammates played a game they weren't involved in. Each wondered when it would end and how.
Kakashi would just give him a new move to practice or tell him to refine what he had already learned and then take off to go spy on Naruto. He spent more of each day spying on his orange wearing student than he did doing anything else. Villagers were taking notice of his behavior. Those who knew Naruto would grin and shake their heads, thinking the Uzumaki magic was working again, while those who didn't, but knew Kakashi, wondered what he was doing. Needless to say Kakashi and Naruto were slowly drawing the attention of the entire village as they played their game.
At the tower, Iruka and Sarutobi watched the pair as they faced off in a battle of wills and waited. "I wish Hatake would give up. She won't give in and he should know that by now," said Sarutobi.
"He knows and it's exactly why he won't give in as you say. For the first time in ages, he's having fun," said Iruka. "Naruto is challenging him and that's something no one has done since Minato-Hokage died. By this time it isn't so much about what the secret is as it is over who will concede victory first. Kakashi doesn't give a hoot what the other two do with their day. He carefully selects the team mission based on what he believes Sasuke will find beneath him and Sakura will find too dirtying to do and those two genin know to find the missions not worth doing as well. Then he grins as he accepts that particular mission. I also know he shows up at the job sites to see how Naruto is progressing with it. His training these days is all about her and only about her. He won't help her with the mission but if he thinks she's doing it wrong he'll tell the contractor to show her how to do it after he shows them. And he won't let the contractors take advantage of her by trying to make her do more than is on the job list or lift things that are too heavy just so they can laugh at her when she falls under it. He makes the contractors take those workers to task lest he report the abuse of a genin to you or the mission office. Since they all know they won't be able to commission another mission if they are reported for abusing a genin sent to do a mission for them they take his threat seriously. But because of his behind the scenes interest in the missions she does, people are noticing what's going on. Now everyone in the village is taking note. Even the other jounin are noticing, though they think it's great. They all know how very young he is compared to most of them and all of them are talking about how he's showing more youthful energy and things of that nature. Gai is of course trying to take the credit but anyone who's been watching things here in the village these last few months knows why he's perked up and it doesn't have a thing to do with Gai."
Sarutobi stood there blinking for a few minutes before he grinned. "Good. Then it is time to move onto the next step. It's time to get to the paperwork for that mission we discussed a few months back. Koharu and Kiku tell me they have the wardrobes ready for the girls and the seamstress is done with Natsu's clothing though she wants pictures of it on her. Hiashi is on board as well. Apparently he's known for the last five years who Naruto really is and why we hid her the way we did. He gave his clan strict orders regarding Naruto and has followed through on them to make damn sure the clan knows he means business. So he's gonna help us make sure they don't get wind of it and run before we can get everything in place. All we have to do is get the mission set up and perform the ceremonies."
"And the signatures?"
"Already got them. Remember when the Daimyo came for his yearly check on the village? I pulled him in on the plan then and told him why it was necessary to trick them both into it. He is the one that presented it to them so Kakashi thinks the Daimyo actually authorized foreigners to oversee his team. Even if Kaakshi smelled a rat in that he couldn't say anything because it was the Daimyo himself who presented the paper for his signature. Sneaky man even did it in a way to where Sasuke and Sakura did not sign the same form Natsu and Kakashi did. The Daimyo used a fake document for Sasuke and Sakura but a real application for marriage for both Kakashi and little Natsu. It was even witnessed by you, me and the Daimyo. It's totally legal and binding on both of them. And the best part is neither of them have a clue."
Sarutobi gave Iruka his orders and watched as the respect for the deviousness of his commanding officer grew in the chunnin's eyes. By the time he was finished outlining his plan both men were grinning like fools. "Sasuke and Sakura are both thirteen now so, as far as the ninja community will be concerned, they are legal now. Natsu will turn thirteen in a month so she will be legal as well. That was the Daimyo's only stipulation. She has to be of legal age which is why we were forced to wait. Let's get this done."
A month later Team Seven was standing before Sarutobi receiving a new mission. Sarutobi sat behind his desk and motioned for Hiashi to close the doors of the office. Hiashi did so and activated the jutsu that would keep everything sealed into the room. And keep either Sasuke or Kakashi from fleeing the room as soon as they figured out what was occurring. Hiashi had been informed as to the true happenings for the day and he knew exactly how both men would react. He also knew the youngest of the foursome was likely to be the deadliest of them all, as that child was not nearly as slow as he/she let everyone believe she was. In Hiashi's eyes three of the foursome were still children no matter what anyone said. They were his daughter's age and since she was still his baby girl there was no way he could see Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura as adults. The group of adults had figured both the guys would try to run for the hills as soon as the truth of this meeting was exposed. But Hiashi thought they were misreading things if they honestly thought Naruto would simply stand still and take it without a word.
"All right. Are we ready now, Hiashi? Kiku?"
"Hai," both replied. Hiashi moved to stand beside Sasuke at the same time Kiku moved to stand beside Sakura as Iruka poured three cups full of fruit juice for them. Kiku placed a red and white kerchief on Sakura's head causing the girl to give her a funny look. Naruto was looking confused and standing at the back of the room with Kakashi who was also looking slightly confused. Kakashi knew Sasuke's test had come out positive when he'd been tested for virility over last few months but he had no clue what was happening now. Truth was, he hadn't really cared how Sasuke's test had come out. He was a lot more interested in Naruto and the game they were playing than in anything regarding Sasuke and Sakura.
"All right then. Sasuke you are being wed to Sakura today." Kakashi dropped his book. Naruto tilted his head and opened his mouth. Kakashi covered it automatically as he picked his book up. Sakura squealed in glee but then looked confused as the words sank in. Sarutobi went on speaking as if his ears weren't ringing the wedding bells for the couple.
"This is at the behest of your guardian, Hyuuga Hiashi, and the bride's mother, Haruno Kiku, and is in the best future interest of the village. Sasuke, Sakura will, from this day forward, be your wife in all ways for all her remaining days. When she is delivered of her first child, boy or girl, a second wife will be chosen for you and possibly a third as well. I don't really see a need for a fourth or fifth wife as of yet but that may change down the road."
Hiashi stood at Sasuke's side keeping a close eye on him and ready to catch him if his constitution should prove not up to the task. But he did not touch the Uchiha knowing it would be a slam to the boy's pride to do so. Hyuuga and Uchiha had that much in common. They did not openly ask for or take support from anyone they could not later deny having either had a choice about taking or taken at all.
While Sasuke was pale in shock, mumbling without sound 'pink haired sons' and Sakura silent in glee, Sarutobi went through the ceremony uniting them as a married couple. Sasuke was fighting to stay on his feet and hide his shaking as all he could see was a bevy of pink haired, red eyed sons all calling for different katon maneuvers while they were still in diapers. As a result he found his voice locked deep in his mental mind unable to break the barriers. Neither teen said a word as the ceremony drew to a close, since all Sakura could do was squeal when she was asked a question, and the two elders directed their actions and responses to the cues given by Sarutobi. When Hiashi pushed a cup of juice to Sasuke's lips, the beverage drippled down his chin and without thinking about it he grabbed the kerchief off Sakura's head to wipe it up before it could reach his white shorts. All the adults had to bite back laughter as Sakura put a hand up automatically to save her headpiece and screeched. Sasuke was shaking his head in denial but since he couldn't get his voice to work it didn't count. Nor did the wild panic in his black eyes as he deposited the kerchief back on her hair causing her to wail and snatch it off again.
Then when Kiku and Hiashi stepped back, pulling the newly wed couple with them and holding them firmly in place between them, Sarutobi motioned for Kakashi and Naruto to step forward. Wondering what was going to happen now, they did so as Hiashi opened the doors to allow Koharu and Iruka to enter the chambers. Naruto's eyes narrowed with suspicion as soon as he saw the pair. Turning that narrowed eyed gaze on the Hokage he waited for what the old man would do now. Sarutobi simply sealed the room to intruders once again before speaking again. "Now that the formalities are out of the way, we can get on with the chosen way of life of the four of you. I have a new mission for you and this little ceremony fits right in with it." He indicated Sasuke and Sakura.
Kakashi raised his silver brow wondering silently if this was worth putting away his book for. He decided it was better to put it away then to drop it again with Sarutobi's next words. He never noticed when Iruka plucked the book from his pouch and passed it off to Hiashi who hid it in his robes. Hatake would not be taking those books on this trip. "Naruto, henge please. I need you to be a girl for this mission." When Naruto stood stock still and glared at the old man with narrowed eyes, silently refusing to do as he was told, the old man waved his hands and in Naruto's place stood a tiny little girl with blond curls and big blue eyes in a pixie's little form. Naruto glanced at his body and by the time he raised his eyes again, fury radiated across her features followed quickly by shocked apprehension and dismay.
"What are you thinking, Jijii?" she growled at him in a very soft feminine purr of pure unadulterated menace. Kakashi was surprised to see Iruka move slightly away from the tiny girl and Sarutobi actually gulped as she began to actually stalk forward towards the aged man.
Hiashi was actually still thinking clearly enough to grab the back of her outfit and hold her in place since he had known she would not simply go into shock as Sasuke had. It seemed Hiashi had correctly deduced which of the four would be the most quick thinking and therefore dangerous. Sarutobi sent him a deeply thankful look as the head of the Hyuuga clan held the tiny girl in place. "Koharu, perhaps you will take young Naruto here into the back room and help him, I mean her, to change into the clothes, Hokage-sama had brought here for the new mission?" Hiashi asked Koharu.
Koharu grinned and motioned for Iruka to take Kiku's place as the two women stepped over to the little angry blonde girl. Each of them took her by an arm and escorted her into the back room to change her clothing. They talked to the small female the whole way but didn't give an inch in their grip on her elbows. A beautiful white kimono decorated with seed pearls, made to her specifications, was waiting for her. Diamonds and sapphire slivers decorated the sash that held the kimono wrapped around her body. On the dresser was a brush, hair pins and make-up. The women were determined Natsu would dress like a true bride for her wedding and have as close to a normal real ceremony as they could give her while still keeping her hidden from the rest of the world.
While the women were getting Naruto ready Hiashi brought out the bottle of Sake and refilled the wedding cups but this time it was real Sake he filled the cups with. Since this was not a mock marriage they would use the real thing whenever it was possible. Besides with Kakashi's nose he would know if they gave him fruit juice in place of sake. They weren't so worried about what he would say today about any of the proceedings since Sarutobi told him it was a mission and this was simply necessary for it to be carried out. But when he figured out there was no mission any hole he could pick in today's proceedings he would. If he chose to. And considering he didn't think he needed a wife at all, it was entirely likely he would choose to. Three flat stacked cups each were held on a serving tray designed specifically for this occasion. Sarutobi handed Kakashi a scroll to read for his role in the drama just as Koharu and Kiku came back into the office with a clearly fuming Naruto between them. Hiashi set the Sake cup arrangement on the desk just as the women escorted Naruto back in to stand beside Kakashi in front of the desk.
"Now, that we are all here again, as to the question you asked before Naruto, remember that paper you all signed over a month ago? Well, you have your first mission." He held up a specially prepared scroll to demonstrate. "You are to act as two married couples on their honeymoon and take this scroll to Shi no Sato. Once you are there, the scroll can be opened the morning after you arrive. Then, follow the directions on the scroll to complete the mission."
"Well, then you got a problem, Old Man," growled Natsu. "We aren't two married couples and we aren't going to be anytime soon, fancy set-up and get-up or not. Not to mention, I just turned thirteen a few freakin' days ago. Who in their bloody hell right mind would ever believe a thirteen year old was allowed to marry a raging lunatic of a prowling, stalking, Kami damned pervert like him?" She jerked her thumb at Kakashi, who was standing quite still with a deeply thoughtful look. Natsu continued her rant. "I'm a boy, damn it. And as such I am not marrying anyone. Not today or anytime soon Old Man."
Kakashi had gone totally still the minute he had seen Naruto being escorted back into the office from the back room. She wore a traditional white wedding kimono, complete with a white cloth to cover her upswept hair and white face paint. His thoughts were centered on why the adults had insisted Naruto be dressed in the traditional wedding attire while not doing so with Sakura. Hokage's words to Naruto brought him out of his head and back to his surroundings.
"Well, first off, as your guardian, you will marry who I tell you to when I tell you to." Sarutobi's voice went iron hard as he returned the small girl's stare. He waited until she seemed to understand this was her guardian speaking and not her Hokage. Then he continued in a softer voice, lying his pants off since he was the one who approved of her wedding dress. "But as for what's happening today, no. As beautiful as you look, you aren't actually marrying anyone. But I am going to perform a mock marriage for you in this form to Hatake for the mission. It will hold up to inspection should anyone check because I know just how damn good your henges are and I know for a fact that your henge will only fall under certain conditions, none of which will be present during this mission. So I will marry Natsu Sukai to Hatake Kakashi for the mission." Natsu's eyes narrowed when she heard him say her true name but before she could say a word he was speaking again.
Because he believed it to be a mock marriage Kakashi didn't raise a stink about it. He read from the scroll when he was directed to do so and then took the traditional three small sips from each of the Sake cups as directed. He handed each cup to Naruto, who took a small sip before he picked up the next cup. She was setting each cup back on the tray rather then handing the cups to Sarutobi as she was supposed to. But Sarutobi just reached out and took each one as she set it down anyway. He grinned as he took a sip before passing it to Koharu, who grinned before passing it to Iruka. Unlike the cups from Sasuke and Sakura's wedding these cups made it around the room before being placed back on the tray they had started out on. Natsu frowned at each one as it was put back. She even gave Hiashi a frown as he set the last one back on the tray to which he just gave that twitch of the lips that passed for a smile amongst the Hyuuga clan.
The only thing Kakashi didn't like was the fact that Sarutobi had chosen to give Naruto the Yondaime's last name for the ceremony. "Oi!" he said startled. "Why give him the Yondaime's name for this?"
"Hatake, look at her. Then look at his portrait. Now tell me will anyone doubt it is her name? He's gone. He won't mind. And since he is partially to blame for Naruto's life, I think lending the boy his name is the least he can, and would do, if he were here to have a say." Natsu was looking at the portrait herself, her expression a confused mixture of grief and pain blended equally with pride and remorse. "Besides I'm not giving you a choice. For the purposes of this mission, your wife is Namikaze Natsu Sukai."
"Hai but I don't like you using his name like this."
"Don't worry about it, Hatake. He wouldn't like it either," said a suspicious Natsu in her soft voice that rubbed along his nerves like velvet on the skin. She was very suspicious of why Sarutobi was using her birth name and making her be in her real form for the ceremony. But with her team right there she couldn't say a word about it. And Sarutobi didn't allow her to stay after the team left his office. "And Jijii. . .this isn't over. Not by a long shot." The glare she gave him had him gulping but damn it, he knew Kakashi was the right man.
Koharu took Naruto back into the back room to change her clothing again. This time she was dressed in a silver, gold and red kimono decorated with cranes, tortoises and plum blossoms as tradition demanded. Once the team was gone, the Daimyo and Jiraiya, the Toad Sennin, stepped out from the wall where they had been hidden all along.
"She's quick. I thought I was going to have to name a replacement for you by the end of the day there for a minute or two," said the Daimyo. "Definitely her Kaasan's daughter."
Sarutobi nodded giving a sigh of relief once more for Hiashi's quick thinking. Natsu knew exactly how to make her points known and felt when she thought someone was doing something, or forcing her into something that was not in her best interest.
Jiraiya chuckled, "She's a good match for him though. She'll keep him on his toes."
"Raising her has certainly been interesting. She's a good girl though. She really does try to stay out of trouble but given who she is that's pretty much impossible. Still she's been keeping Kakashi on his toes for a year now and he loves it. She doesn't realize it though. To her, he's just a pervert wanting to know what she considers none of his business but everyone can see he's totally caught by her. Not that he knows she really is a girl. She won't tell him. Nor does anyone else in the village know she's a girl. But everyone can see she has Kakashi wrapped around her little finger," sighed Sarutobi.
Author Note: I looked up the traditional ritual for a Japanese wedding so I could have Naruto actually dressed correctly for the ceremony. According to the website I found, she is supposed to change clothing one more time into a brightly colored outfit but the site was not specific as to when she was to change into that outfit. The site claimed the Sake cups symbolize the wedding vows between the couple with the groom taking a sip from each of the cups before passing the cup to the bride. There are three cups but it was unclear as to what each cup represents or why there are so many of them. Maybe it's so both will be at least a little tipsy and therefore more relaxed for the activities to come after the formal ceremony? And the wedding ceremony is supposed to last all day beginning at dawn and ending at sunset. I could not do the entire wedding ceremony as that would have been wayyyy too obvious and even Sakura would have figured things out if I had a Shinto monk there to preform the ceremony for Natsu and Kakashi. Heck even Kakashi would have figured that one out. And the wedding ceremonies are supposed to take place at a Shinto Temple but we all know, seven adults present that know exactly what's going on or not there was absolutely no way Sarutobi would have been able to get Natsu to stand still for that.