Disclaimer: I don't own anything Supernatural or whatnot, it is all property of the CW11 network and the Kripke. So don't sue and please don't be offended by the language cause it's gonna be colorful to say the least.

Chapter 10

" NO, no, no, no, no, no! This isn't real! This isn't fucking happening! Oh my god this cannot be fucking happening!"

These were the words that dominated Dean Winchester's vapor-locked mind as his feet crashed down over the stairs of Bobby Singer's house.

Hysterical sobs mingled with heaving screams, tears running down his face as he barreled wilding towards the front door.

His ears dimly caught the sounds of feet close behind him, and voices calling out his name.

Sam and Bobby giving chase after him.

This served only to make Dean run faster as he reached the front door and nearly yanked it off it's hinges as he threw it open and shot over it's threshold into the cold, South Dakota air.

The cold bit at his exposed skin without mercy.

But, Dead didn't feel it, all he could feel was cold despair as he barreled towards the Impala.

He had to get away.

He needed to get away.

He couldn't stay here.

Not after what he'd done to Sammy.

What he'd done to Sammy.

Sammy.

This was all Dean's overtaxed mind could think to do in regards to the situation he found himself in.

However, it was when he actually reached the car's driver side door and reached for his car keys rgar gis plans to flee came to a dead halt.

His jeans pockets were empty.

To his chagrin, Dean realized that his keys were in his jacket pocket and his jacket was back inside the house, draped over Bobby's ratty old couch.

" SHIT!" Thought Dean as he tugged uselessly at the car door's handle in a futile attempt to get it open.

" DEAN!" Came a loud, fear-filled wail.

Dean's tear filled eyes looked up at the sound of the familiar voice that called out his name so desperately.

He felt his pounding heart come to a grinding halt as he saw Sam, his baby brother running towards him looking absolutely terrified and with rivers of clear saline pouring out of his own eyes and down his face.

" Oh God no, I can't face him. Not now, not ever!" Screamed Dean's mind.

It was with this despairing thought that Dean relinquished his white-knuckled grip on the Impala's car-door handle and bolted towards Bobby's salvage yard as fast as his legs could carry him.

" Dean wait! Please Stop!" Yelled Sam, picking up the pace himself as he resumed the chase after his absolutely distraught older sibling.

His long legs were a blessing now as he ran into the salvage yard.

All the while as he ran, his breath kept catching in his chest and coming out as a sob at some moments and an almost wheeze some other moments.

But Sam could care less about how messed up the anguish he was feeling was making his breathing.

All he was focused on was the rapidly fleeing form of his elder brother several feet ahead of him and how he needed to close that distance between them.

" Dean!" Yelled Sam as he pushed forward, flying across the gravelly dirt, mountains of rusty metal passing him by in a blur.

Behind the two Winchester brothers, Bobby Singer followed after Sam and wondered whether his heart was going to give out on him or not.

Damn, he was getting to old for this.

Dean was running so fast he was almost halfway through the salvage yard.

He could hear every single plea from Sam but ignored them, he kept running.

He kept running.

Behind him, Sam was steadily closing the distance between them when he suddenly felt a wave of dizziness hit him.

Instinctively, his body began to slow down, an unforeseen exhaustion and ache settling over him.

Then the dizziness was back, only ten times stronger.

With a small groan, Sam felt his legs buckle under him as fire shot through his gut.

He staggered over to a rusted and slightly crumpled Buick and grabbed hold of it to keep himself as upright as possible.

" SAM!" Came a yell from somewhere behind him, it sounded so far away.

But Sam, now panting and in the grips of vertigo kept staring straight ahead at the still running for of Dean, growing smaller and smaller with each passing second.

" DEAN!" He half screamed, half sobbed, the fear clear in his voice as he stared after Dean with eyes that were beginning to go black near the edges of his vision.

" Sam!"

There was that voice again and in addition, a pair of hands were on him, gripping his arm and his shoulder trying to hold him steady and keep him upright.

Bobby.

" Danggit Boy, what is it? What's wrong?" Came the urgent inquiries right near Sam's ear.

" Bobby... Tired... Dizzy... don't... don't know why... Dean." Breathed Sam as his body buckled further, his back falling against Bobby's chest.

Not being able to hold up the giant that was Sam Winchester, Bobby eased them both down to the ground.

Panic settled over Bobby as he literally felt Sam begin to go boneless against him.

He couldn't take care of the situation alone.

He just couldn't.

And so, he drew in a huge lungful of air and used it for a task other than respiration.

Up ahead, Dean had come to a grinding halt when he'd heard his brother screaming out his name again and was about to turn when he heard another familiar voice loudly beseech him.

" DEAN, GET OVER HERE NOW, WE NEED YOU!"

Bobby.

Dean whirled around and felt his entire body suffer a paralyzing jolt at what his eyes zeroed in on several feet from where he stood.

" Sam." Whispered Dean as he stared at the slumped over figure resting against a panic-stricken Bobby Singer.

Then something switched on inside him, killing the urge to flee.

Big Brother Mode was on.

" SAMMY!" Yelled Dean as is legs began to move again, this time bolting back down the way they had come.

Back to Sam's side.

Sam needed him.

Dean flew back across the salvage yard and within seconds he was falling to his knees before Sam and Bobby.

" Bobby, what is it, what happened?" Barked Dean as he scrubbed at the salt that clung to his cheeks.

There would be more tears later, but right now there was no time for that.

" I don't know what happened, one second he was running after ya, the next his knees were buckled and he was using the car to hold himself up. He just said that he's tired and dizzy, then he called out for ya before he went totally limp." Answered Bobby, his eyes looking down to see the still conscious but vacant and pale face of Sam, save for the crease between his eyebrows that indicated that he was still in pain.

Dean knelt closer to Sam till there were almost eye to eye and nose to nose, he licked his dry and salt stained lips before he spoke.

" Sammy?" He asked softly, hesitantly.

Dean watched with some relief as Sam's eyes, which had become hooded and slightly glazed, blinked and then looked up to meet his expectant gaze.

" D-Dean." Whispered Sam, slowly lifting up a hand and reaching for his brother.

Feeling his eyes sting and wondering how it was possible that Sam was still here with him let alone reach out towards him.

Swallowing back the turmoil raging within him, Dean reached up with his own shaking hand and met Sam's, gripping it firmly but not too tight.

" D-Dean don't go. Please don't go." Whispered Sam, fresh tears spilling down his cheeks.

Dean stayed silent.

Sam didn't want him to go.

The brother he'd raped didn't want him to go.

Didn't want there to be the farthest distance known to man between them.

" How can you say that to me?" Thought Dean as with a painful swallow of his tight throat, Dean released Sam's hand in order to wrap his arm around his baby brother's shoulders and pull Sam to him.

It left Dean in awe when Sam didn't resist and came willingly to him.

But a small noise, a groan almost from the younger man snapped Dean out of his surprise and had him moving forward with his intended actions.

While cradling close Sam in the crook of his arm with his head against his own shoulder, Dean hooked his other arm under the bend of Sam's knees.

Bobby Singer watched feeling slightly dumbstruck as Dean slowly rose to his feet, taking Sam with him as he did so.

That in itself was a feat in itself considering Sam's height and weight.

But there Dean was, with Sam laying loose in his arms.

Dean stood tall and silent, his face set in stone.

A small moan escaped Sam as he felt a ringing between his ears and a numbness much like when one is sick with fever wash over him.

" Dean... Dean I don't... don't feel so good. I-I..." Sam trailed off as he felt the arm Dean had around his shoulders tighten just a little more.

Sam sighed and sagged against Dean, his head coming to rest on his big brother's shoulder.

Still silent, Dean took a step forward, and then another, and another until he was walking over the gravelly dirt.

Bobby rose to his feet and hurriedly caught up with the oldest Winchester brother, his eyes never leaving the pale and lethargic younger brother who was dangling in his older siblings arms.

All three of them were headed out of the salvage yard and back towards the house.

Sam let his eyes-lids droop and fully close over his eyes.

A few stray tears escaped through the seams. Lightly sniffling and just feeling like crap both physically and emotionally, Sam turned his head inward, burying his face into the side of Dean's throat.

This act made Dean nearly stumble and send them both to the ground.

As he felt Sam breathe against him, Dean felt his heart shatter inside his chest.

How, after everything could Sam do that?

How could Sam seek out comfort from him?

How could Sam not be screaming at the top of his lung and fighting tooth and nail to get out of the arms that were holding him?

With these question and his very soul feeling like it was being bathed in the strongest acids known to man, Dean dimly felt Bobby Singer trot past him when they all reached the front stairs of the house.

The older man flew up the stairs to get the front door open for them.

Dean slowly made his way onto the porch and then through the open door, Bobby quickly shutting it once Dean had maneuvered himself and the rather large individual he was carrying over the threshold.

Then it was a long and arduous climb up the stairs to the second floor and then down the hall to the guest room, where everything had gone to hell not more than twenty minutes earlier.

Once he'd reached the room he and Sam had been sharing, Dean silently made his way over to the bed by the window and slowly, carefully lowered his baby brother onto the mattress.

Sam let out a small noise of protest at the loose of Dean's warmth as he lightly flopped onto the bed, coming to lay flat on his back.

Dean knelt beside the bed, Bobby coming to join him as the two older men gazed at Sam with worry and concern coming off them in waves.

Dean was the one to break the tense silence.

" Sammy?" He asked.

Sam turned his head towards Dean at the sound of the familiar nickname and slowly willed his eyes to open.

" Sammy, what happened? What's wrong?" Asked Dean.

At this, Sam licked his lips before he spoke.

" Besides the obvious stuff that's wrong?" He asked with a scratchy, tear roughened voice.

" Yeah, besides that." Answered Dean softly, trying his best to look calm.

" I just got dizzy real fast while I was... While I was runnin' after you." Sighed Sam, his entire expression growing sad as he gazed at Dean before speaking again.

" I'm so sorry Dean."

This took Dean aback and he all but gawked at his baby brother.

It took him a moment to contemplate the words that were spoke and get his throat to loosen.

" Sammy, what the hell are you sorry for?" He asked in disbelief.

He watched as Sam's eyes welled with fresh tears and his entire face crumbled a little before he answered.

" All of this happened because of me Dean. I led us the wrong way that night when we were hunting that witch. You were mad at me and that made it easier for the Succubus to curse us both and now I'm... Now I-I'm..." Sam trailed off, his hands unconsciously moving to rest over his stomach as a tiny sob escaped him.

With a hitched breath, Sam turned away from Dean and Bobby out of misery and maybe a hint of shame as well and curled up almost into a complete ball.

Dean felt his insides turn to ice as his baby brother's words register and beside him he could hear Bobby let out a shaky breath of disbelief.

Then, not being able to stand it, Dean reached out and firmly gripped his brother's shoulder and lightly yanked him back around.

" Sammy, oh my God man c'mon, please look at me." He all but cried.

He waited for the Sammy Ball to uncurl a little and look at him with watery moss-green eyes before he spoke again.

" Sammy, how the fuck could you say something like that Sammy. You got nothing to be sorry about. This, all of this, is my fault man, not yours. I am the one who killed the witch, I am the one who that demon was gonna go after. This is on me man, not you." Said Dean, his voice increasingly breaking with each syllable.

Feeling his own heart breaking for Dean and not himself, Sam reached out and came to grip his big brother's shoulder.

The touch served only to break Dean further as he reached up with his own hand and covered Sam's.

" Damn it Sam, this is all so fucked up." Whispered Dean.

Sam nodded in agreement.

They stayed in the silence, the three of them, each at a real lose as to what to do, what to say, how they would do it.

It was Dean who broke the silence.

" Sammy, how can you be sure that you are... um... that you are pre-pregnant?" He asked wanting to know and maybe even hoping that it was something else.

Sam blinked, contemplating the question before he answered.

" W-Well... all I can really go on is that when I said that... that you were the f-father... all this red mist came shooting outta you... In the book it said that, when the second victim names the first victim as the sire of their offspring, then the Succubus's lingering poison would be expelled. That's what happened to you Dean, the red mist was the poison and now it's out of you." Said Sam, stumbling just a little.

" God, I wish you'd have let it stay in me Sammy." Thought Dean as he nodded mutely at his brother's explanation.

" But other than that, you can't go on anything else and be absolutely sure?" Asked Dean, now feeling desperate to be sure himself.

It was here that a light bulb went off.

In Bobby Singer's head no less.

Dean and Sam were both startled when Bobby suddenly shot to his feet and abruptly turned and made a B-line for the door.

" Bobby, where the Hell are you goin'? Yelled Dean.

" I'm gonna get something from town, you two just stay here and try not to go runnin' through my salvage yard again. Sam, you stay there on the bed and try to keep yourself as calm as possible, I don't want you to almost or all the way pass out again!" Tossed Bobby very rapidly over his shoulder before he was out the door and vanishing down the hall, leaving the two young men still in the room in a slight stupor.

it was only when they heard the distant sound of a door slamming shut, followed by the low rumbling of a car engine rapidly receeding that Sam and Dean snapped out of it and looked at each other, very confused.

Then, Dean swallowed thickly and spoke.

" Sammy, I remember... I remember everything that happened... Everything I did to you."

" It wasn't your fault Dean." Said Sam immediately in an effort to ease Dean's guilt.

It served only to make him feel worse as he exploded.

" THE HELL IT ISN'T!" Yelled Dean as he shot to his feet, tearing himself away from his brother's side.

Sam flinched a little at the volume of his brother's voice and watched as Dean began pacing around, agitation and self-loathing radiating off of him in drones.

But he also felt anger flood through his veins as well.

" NO, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT DEAN. THE ONLY THING I BLAME IS THAT SUCCUBUS. IT'S BECAUSE OF THAT SUCCUBUS THAT WE'RE IN THIS FUCKING MESS, NOT YOU!" Yelled back Sam.

Then just as quickly, the anger left Sam, leaving him much like a deflated balloon as he spoke, much quieter this time.

" And please, stop yelling and screaming Dean, I don't want to have to chase you around the salvage yard if you upset yourself enough to end up running outta here again."

The second these words registered in his mind, Dean came to an abrupt and complete halt in his pacing.

He whirled around to face his brother and felt a clenching feeling within his chest when his eyes beheld how pale and miserable, how all together hopeless his baby brother looked right now.

In an instant Dean was back at Sam side, perched on the bed.

" All right Sammy, I won't yell, I won't go running outta here, just take it easy." Said Dean, trying to be soothing when in reality he just wanted to start yelling and screaming and maybe even running out of the room like he had earlier before.

Meanwhile, on the road leading into town...

Bobby Singer floored the accelerator on his beat up tow truck, speeding towards town as fast as he could go.

But, once he was actually in sight of his intended destination, Bobby slowed the vehicle down considerably before he rolled into town.

Once he was in, Bobby put on a show of not being panicked and in a real bad hurry.

Bobby made his way over to the local pharmacy and parked in one of the vacant spaces, then he was all but running to the buildings doors.

The doors had barely closed after him once he was inside before Bobby was quickly glancing up at the signs that hung above the many isles of products before taking off towards the right isles.

Bobby made his way between two of the tall shelves, his eyes darting from left to right in search of the items he was looking for.

Then, his eyes fell on the rows of rectangular boxes all stacked neatly together.

Home pregnancy Tests.

Bobby quickly made his way over to this section of the shelving arrangements, and read the named off the boxes as fast as he could.

EPT.

First Response.

Clear Blue Easy Digital.

And a whole plethora of other boxes.

It was so much that Bobby's head was almost spinning from it all.

But, knowing that time was off the essence, Bobby snatched up a box of Clear Blue Easy Digital and headed straight for the Pharmacy's cashier counter.

After laying down twenty bucks, Bobby was hightailing out of there and back to his truck.

Then he was rolling out of town and then hitting the accelerator once again, with his home and the two young men he'd left there being his new destination.

Back at the aforementioned house...

Two brothers sat in awkward and all consuming silence.

Dean sat over the edge of the bed, staring at the wall, but not really seeing it.

Sam sat propped up against the headboard, his eye gazing sadly at his brother's profile.

The silence seemed to go on for a lifetime before Dean spoke.

" Can I see the damage Sammy?" He asked softly.

" There's barely anything left to see Dean." Answered Sam, just as softly.

" Please, I need to see what is left Sammy." Countered Dean as he turned pleading eyes to his baby brother.

After another moment of resistance, Sam nodded and reached up with his hands for the buttons of his flannel shirt and slowly began to undo them to reveal his chest.

He held his breath when Dean leaned in close to see.

Dean felt his stomach roll violently when he caught sight of the fading bruises.

And he could see the marks of teeth littering skin, nipples that were still slightly red, clearly having been chewed on. This combined with the memories of that night itself assaulted Dean without mercy in that moment.

He'd only lain eyes on this sight for mere seconds before he found that he could not look any further.

Dean wrenched his eyes away and barely stifled a sob before he spoke with a strained voice.

" I'm so sorry Sammy." He whispered.

" I know Dean, but I'll say it again that it wasn't your fault." Said Sam firmly and with all the conviction he could muster.

Then, Dean was turning back to face Sam with wet eyes that traveled from Sam's sad but not angry face to his exposed chest.

Sam watched and went still as Dean reached for him.

Then, he felt a full blown ache blossom through his chest as he watched his brother's hands seek out the two halves of his partially open shirt.

Sam's eyes misted over as he watched his brother silently began to redo the buttons of his open shirt.

" Thank you Dean." He said softly while holding back tears.

" Don't mention it Sammy." Replied Dean with a small, watery attempt at a smile.

Then, the moment was broken when there was a low rumbling coming in from outside, steadily increasing this time, signaling the returned of Bobby Singer.

A few seconds after that, the loud banging of the front door flying open.

Dean and Sam both heard the sound of urgent footfalls coming up the stair and then down the hall.

Naturally, Bobby Singer came nearly tumbling over his own two feet into the room, a white plastic bag in one hand.

" All right, I know this is most likely gonna freak you boys out big time but, these may be the only way to know for sure that Sam does have a... bun in the oven." Said a slightly breathless but all the way sheepish and unsure Bobby as he held out the plastic bag to Sam.

With the beginning of fear growing in the pit of his stomach, Sam took the offered bag and slowly pulled it open to view it's contents.

Dean and Bobby watched as Sam's eyes grew wide and he gasped before reaching inside to pull out one of the two rectangular boxes.

Dean took a step closer to get a better look and when he did, his eyes too grew wide as the breath left his lungs.

Then both boys turned to lock their gazes on Bobby.

The older man squirmed for only a second before he straightened his back and spoke with a firm, no nonsense voice.

" It's the only other way I could think of to be sure right now." He said with a small shrug of his shoulders.

Silence followed before Sam spoke up.

" Okay, this is the only other option we have right now." He said softly as he turned to Dean.

" I guess I better... go to the bathroom and use these." He added before he slowly walked past Dean and Bobby into the hall.

It took Dean and Bobby both a moment to snapped out of whatever trance had fallen on them before they were instantly following right behind him.

Before Sam could protest, Dean cut him off.

" There is no way you're doing this alone, me and Bobby aren't going anywhere." Said Dean with fierce determination blazing in his eyes, beside him Bobby nodded in total agreement.

" Okay." Said Sam before he turned and took a few steps further down the hall until he reached the bathroom door.

Then with a final look over his shoulder at Dean and Bobby, Sam stepped over the threshold and shut the door behind him with a soft click.

For Dean and Bobby, it was here that their worry grew the worst.

Inside the bathroom, Sam leaned heavily against the wooden door and let the empty plastic bag fall from his finger onto the floor unnoticed.

Sam's complete attention was focused solely on the box of Clear Blue Easy Digital Pregnancy tests held in his other hand and the instructions for proper use printed on the back of it.

Then, he set to work doing something he never, ever thought he'd have to do in his entire life.

He was after all, a dude.

Sam breathed deep as he pulled one end of the box open and took out one of it's foil wrapped contents.

With trembling fingers he somehow managed to peel the foil open and pull out the white stick with a dark blue cap cover the end of it.

Sam reached for the cap and gently yanked it off of the stick with a small click, revealing the flat, absorbent tip.

The part he was supposed to pee on.

Oh Crap.

Feeling petrified, Sam set the uncapped pregnancy test down on top of the box it had just been pulled out of and stepped over to the toilet.

He stood facing it and proceeded to undo the button on his jeans and pulled down the zipper.

Then, taking a deep and rattling breath through his nostrils, Sam willed his body to perform the act that was required.

Feeling just the slightest bit of humiliation and trying his best to ignore the sound of liquid hit porcelain, Sam used his long arms to pick up the white stick and brought it in close to him.

Steadying his nerve, the young man lowered it past his naval, making sure the absorbent tip was down and away.

When he was sure that the tip had been thoroughly saturated, Sam pulled the stick away and set it back on the box while he finished his current business.

When he was done, he used some toilet paper and then flushed the toilet.

Quickly zipping up his fly and redoing the button, Sam stepped over to the sink and rapidly turned on the faucet and roughly washed his hands.

After he'd toweled his hands dry, he picked up the pregnancy test and replaced the dark blue cap back over the tip.

Then he picked up the box and reread the instruction.

Now came the really hard part.

Waiting for three whole minutes.

180 seconds starting now.

Sam set the timer on the watch that graced his right wrist to that amount of time.

A small beeping sound would tell him when the test was ready.

Though he started to feel as if the walls of the bathroom were slowly closing in on him, Sam kept himself from turning around and walking out the door.

Dean and Bobby were still outside, and he couldn't bring himself to even harbor the thought of going out there and facing them without the solid answer of the pregnancy stick.

And so, Sam silently made his way over to the bathtub and wearily sank down to sit over it's side.

And so, he waited in the silence.

Waited for the seconds that seemed more like eternities upon themselves to pass.

As he sat there, all he could think about was the older brother and second-father figure who were both on the other side of the closed bathroom door.

Dean and Bobby.

With a sigh, Sam waited and began to worry his lower lip.

Time moves forward alway, no matter how much one might think it has slowed to a crawl or stalled all together.

Beep..Beep..Beep..Beep..

The almost chirping sound of the alarm on his watch startled Sam.

Jerkily switching it off, realization dawned on him.

Time was up.

Swallowing down the urge to dive for the toilet and pay homage to it with the contents of his stomach, Sam forced himself to his feet and took the tiny step that led him to stand before the sink.

With a badly trembling hand, Sam reached out for the demure little white and blue stick.

Long fingers managed to wrap around the stick despite the shaking.

Sam brought the stick closer so that he could see what the small oval screen would say.

There wouldn't be any confusing blue lines or half lines or pluses.

Just the words 'Not Pregnant' or 'Pregnant'.

Moss green eyes finally fell on the oval screen at the digital black writing it held.

Meanwhile, outside in the hallway on the other side of the bathroom door, Dean Winchester was in the process of nearly biting his whole fingertip off as he gnawed nervously on his fingernail.

Beside him, Bobby had taken off his signature ball cap and was twisting it in his hands while shifting from foot to foot.

Both men had their gazes glued to the bathroom door.

It seemed that they'd been standing their for all of forever after they'd watched Sam disappear through it.

So it was understandable when both Dean and Bobby nearly jumped when the door suddenly opened to reveal the youngest Winchester.

" S-Sammy?" Asked Dean, fear coiling like a snaked within his stomach as he watched Sam step over the threshold of the bathroom with his head bowed low, hair obscuring the upper half of his face.

Sam was silent as he stood before Dean and Bobby.

Then, he forced himself to straighten and meet their expectant gazes.

Both Dean and Bobby felt their heart clench when they say the resignation and numbness that swam within Sam's eyes.

Still without saying a word, Sam slowly raised his right arm from where it had been hanging loosely by his side, his hand clutched something.

Sam held it out for Dean.

Swallowing when he realized what the item was, Dean hesitantly reached out and took the offering.

He brought it in close to he could see what was held with an oval screen.

Green eyes fell on the oval screen and the digital black writing it held.

A heart slammed to a complete halt within it's place inside an older brother's chest.

There was only one word written on the screen and it was like a sledgehammer to Dean Winchester's mind.

'Pregnant'