Author's Note:

I'm soooooooo sorry this took so long! I've been sooo busy and so has my beta…life is crazy, ya know? I got this done as soon as I could and I'm working on the next chapter. Please accept my apologies and gratitude for all those who reviewed.

I want to especially give a shout out to my anonymous reviewer, Silverfox. You gave me the encouragement to get this chappy done, so thank you very much!

Okay! I chatted enough, so please enjoy and I'm working on the next! REVIEW, PLEASE!

When Life Gives You Lemons

Chapter Four: Dinnertime!

After laboring to get the food and collecting my jumbled thoughts, I beat an incredibly hasty retreat from the Den of the Manic Depressed and His Busty Babe. I sped up and practically flew back home to Remona, feeling kinda pleased with myself. I mean, this all was such a fly by the seat of my pants type thing…but at least I managed to get her in the tub and find her food. That was something, right? Especially for a redheaded Turk who didn't know the first thing about kids.

Torturers and homicidal maniacs, sure; little kids, nah. Tifa never did ask me to babysit her orphan clan, after all. Which is probably a good thing, 'cause I'd most likely have ended up offering them smokes, getting them accidently drunk, or something else just as bad.

What can I say? It's who I am.

But with Remona, I really wanted to try and do something right by her. She was only gonna be with me for a day or so after all, so she deserved my very best.

Jamming my key in, I unlocked the door, and headed for the kitchen. Dumping all the food on the counter, I somehow managed to find the only two clean plates in the entire apartment. The rest were sitting were sitting in a slimy, wet heap in the sink, just waiting to be washed…sometime in the distant future.

I actually owned a dishwasher but I've only ever used it once or twice at most. It was far easier to live on takeout and paper plates.

"Alrighty, now." I muttered and fixed everything up on the plates, turning to the kitchen table. Well, I assumed there was a kitchen table underneath the heap of papers, magazines, piles of ash, ammo, and other assorted crap. Frowning, I briefly contemplated cleaning it off… and then realized how stupid that sounded.

I mean, why clean when you can sweep an arm across and dump everything onto the floor? And that's exactly what I did! I just shoved the crap onto to floor and kicked it into a neat pile in the corner.

There! All clean… could Martha Stewart do any better? Everyone knows men are far more creative cleaners then women with their frilly pink aprons and cookie-scented houses.

"Yeah, that's how it's done!" I cheered, and sat the plates on the table, feeling kinda proud of myself. Despite the mess and all the dirty dishes, I was actually feeling all homey and clean; setting the table for two and stuff. Who knows? Maybe there really is a clean freak homemaker underneath my Turk uniform.

Nah!

Turning to the fridge, I reached in and pulled out two cokes, settling them on the table as I took a moment to marvel at the fact I actually owned a drink that didn't contain alcohol. "Hmm…must've been out of beer last time I went to the store." I mused aloud, shrugging.

"Okay! So, that's a clean table, food, and drinks. By Jove, I think I've got it!" I smirked, mentally patting myself on the back. Ooh…I'm so good! I set a table all by myself…DEFINITELY asking Tseng for a raise next time I see him. Yes, that's called sarcasm, kids; I'm better at it than being a Turk, which is hard to imagine.

But regardless of whether or not I'm a domestic god, I did manage to get everything set up for Remona. Now I just needed to go check on her and make sure she hadn't drowned.

Strolling back through my apartment, I knocked lightly on the bathroom door.

"Hey, Remona! Ya pruned out in there, or what?" I called through the door, smirking slightly when my sharp Turk ears detected her slight chuckle.

"Un-huh! I'm dressed and coming out, Reno!" She called and I stood back as the door opened. And there she stood, looking like a little princess. Okay, so she was wearing my pajamas, which dwarfed her little form, and her hair was wet and slightly frizzy, and her pants were nearly falling off.

But she looked like a princess to me, alright?

"Hey!" I exclaimed in fake shock, "Lookie there! There was a little girl underneath all that dirt!" Remona rewarded me with another of her little chuckles that sounded like some sort of fairy laugh or something. Oh lord…did I really just think that?

I'm either going completely soft, or I'm losing my ever lovin' mind! I really, really hope it's not the latter.

"How do I look?" Remona asked, spinning around like she was wearing a fancy schmancy dress and not my favorite, chopped up PJ set. I grinned and bent down to her level.

"You look like a…" A vagabond, "like a little Princess!" I finished, patting her blonde head like I'd seen some clichéd parental person do on TV. "The clothes fit you alright?" Like I can't see that they're twenty sizes too big…but Remona nodded, and grinned happily.

"Yep! They're big but really, really comfy. Thank you, Reno!" She said, and I smiled sheepishly, rubbing the back of my head. Mylanta, it was only a pair of PJs but to her it was like some priceless gift, or something. Then again, she spent her whole life on the streets; so I guess she didn't really get a whole lot of gifts.

Dang…that's sad.

"No problem, squirt, happy to oblige!" I cheerily waved off her gratitude, "Now, how's about I feed ya a nice meal, or something?" Remona's face lit up like Christmas… you'd have thought I'd just offered to buy her a pony or something! But then again, I guess a hot meal is like a pony to a kid living on the streets.

Darn, I'm depressing myself again! And a depressed Turk is…well, a homicidal, normal type Turk, but that ain't the point! Gotta put on a happy face for the kid, ya know.

"Un huh! I'd like that." Remona agreed, looking all cute and starving. With a slight sigh, I stood up and gestured to the kitchen, forcing a perky smile. Perky…are my eyes twitching yet?

"Alrighty, then! Just follow your gracious host this away and soon you'll be chowing down." I bowed theatrically and Remona laughed once more, causing me to grin. Hey! If I can make small orphaned children laugh, I win at life, right? Yeah, yeah I'm sure you agree.

Two short minutes later, and I was helping Remona up into one of the chairs, showing off the brilliant fish sticks that I suffered to get. Okay, so maybe I just walked two blocks to get them, but by the way Tifa'd been glaring at me, there's a good chance I could've died for those fish sticks.

"Viola! Piping hot fish sticks, compliments of Reno!" I said with relish, feeling almost pleased when Remona stared at them, a hungry look in her eyes. She shot me one of those heart-of-stone melting smiles.

"You made them just for me? Thank you, Reno. You're nice!" Remona said, clapping her little hands together. Okay, now I KNOW my eyes are twitching! And, for some weirder then weird reason, I felt sad. I don't know why, but when she said I was nice, I just felt this sudden kind of sadness inside me; for no reason whatsoever.

"Yeah, well…not many people would agree with ya there, kid." I mumbled, so quietly she couldn't hear. Shaking off these thoughts and sitting myself down next to her, I forced one of my patented plastic smiles and gestured to her food.

"Well, go on and have some, kiddo. We don't stand on ceremony here, ya know." Remona glanced over at me once and then turned on those fish sticks, a suddenly ravenous look in her violet eyes. Well, I didn't need to tell her twice. Suddenly, she was scarfing down those fish sticks so fast, I was half surprised she wasn't chocking.

"Guess it was a bit longer then I thought." I mused aloud, hoping not to be heard. No dice.

"Huh? What 'cha say, Reno?" Remona asked with a mouth full of fish sticks, causing me to wince. Last time I had talked with my mouth full, Elena had nearly belted me. But, hey! It's me, ya know? I don't do the whole "manners" thing, and I wasn't about to make Remona do something I wasn't gonna do.

"I was just wondering…you said you lived on the streets, right? How'd ya get food?" I asked coyly, trying not to be obvious; when I was really dying to know. Remona swallowed her mouthful, and looked down at the plate, her eyes slightly faraway.

"Oh, I stole whatever I could find… but only from those rich people that had enough all the time. When I couldn't find something to steal, I'd just go a little hungry that night." She admitted, not looking up at me. Now, I'm a big boy Turk, and I know them orphans you see on the news living on the streets probably didn't eat out every night, but I still felt sorta sick. There's a difference between seeing the twerps on the TV, looking all pathetic, and having one of them in my kitchen.

"Oh." One stupid word that so didn't cover how bad her stupid, screwed up life has been and how screwed up I felt in that moment. But I wasn't about to start going angsty all over her…she'd been through enough; she deserves a happy, peppy Reno.

"Well, you're eating well tonight!" I exclaimed cheerfully, "And you know what, why don't you take my sandwich here? I ain't so hungry, and it's no good for growing girls to eat just fish sticks…you need some pork and bread, too." I said with an easy grin, magically pulling out a random fact I probably learnt when channeling surfing and accidently watching Bill Nye the Science Guy, because Tseng only knows I blocked all channels that I could actually learn anything from…too much brainpower after a hard day, ya know?

"Oh. But aren't you hungry after working all day?" Remona questioned, casting her brilliant blue-purple eyes upon me. I stiffened, and forced a fake smile, mentally smacking myself.

"Umm, no! I'm not that hungry. 'Sides, I got something sitting in the fridge." Yeah, like three week old pizza… at least it can't kill me. Can it? Aww, who cares! The way Remona was going at that club sandwich was pathetic and sad. She probably hadn't had this good of a meal in quite some time, and it made me feel guilty.

In a way, Shin-Ra was responsible for most of these orphans; and I guess ole' Rufus hasn't figured out (or taken the time to figure out) how we can help them. People like Cloud and his babe, now they're doing things to keep the kiddies safe and fed; but the Turks? Nah…we're still keeping close to the Prez and not exactly doing too many helpful things.

But that could change! Who knew? But dang, staring at the little kiddy going at that sandwich (the wonderful quality, juicy and tasty sandwich) was making me hungry, especially considering I had nothing but three week old pizza covered in fungus to eat later. Ah, well!

She needed the food way more than me. But, then again, I did spend most of the day running around, and trying not to get killed by homicidal maniacs and out of control Summons.

But hey, that's in my job description, you know? It's somewhere under the dental plan and before the "dry cleaning not included" clause.