Within a shabby apartment lay Naruto. He was officially a Genin ninja and is supposed to be assigned onto a team today. He woke up and yawned as the sun made him aglow. With one gulp, he downs an entire carton of expired milk. He then walks over to the cupboard and ties on his well-deserved headband.

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"What's up Sasuke?"

"How's it going Sasuke?"

"Glad you passed, Sasuke!"

"Hey Sasuke!"

"Sasuke!"

As the duo walked down the hallway, a smiling Sasuke waved to several classmates. Naruto's head was down, glaring at his best friend.

Sasuke: Something wrong?

Naruto: Bitch.

Sasuke: Ass.

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Naruto and Sasuke sat behind one of the many long tables in the room. The entire place was bustling with congrats, taunts, and show-offs. Sasuke sat with his elbows on the table behind him while Naruto started bragging to anyone that passed.

Suddenly, something caught Naruto's eye. Sakura, his beautiful crush, walked into the room. Her hips swayed and her hair majestically rippled from her movements.

Naruto: Sakura! Over here!

Sakura: Shut the hell up, Naruto.

Sasuke: coughsLUT

Both Naruto and Sakura turned to Sasuke.

Sakura + Naruto: What'd you say?!

Sasuke: Uh...Naruto? Did you completely ignore Sakura's mean and thoughtless response?

Naruto: Any beautiful woman has the right to speak her mind!

Sasuke: Ah. Logical.

Sakura: You think you're all high and mighty, Uchiha.

???: What's this about Uchihas?

Rudely, someone spanks Sakura in the butt. Everyone turned to see the most infamous Uchiha of their level. He was smiling devilishly. He had a black spikey mohawk with spiked bangs covering his ears. He wore a black sleeveless shirt with the same khaki shorts as Sasuke. He wore one black glove on his left hand, the one on Sakura's rear.

Sakura: Uchiha Ninniku!

Ninniku (groping her): Uchihas aren't that bad. (Gets closer to her face) Especially in tight spaces, right?

Girls in the room: :D

Sasuke: :/

Naruto: 8o

Naruto: Who the hell do you think you are?

Ninniku: Ah, this boy...Fighting with you wastes my time. So I'd rather just watch as you fail as a ninja.

Naruto: Why you!

Ninniku: Come Sakura.

Sakura: I did.

Ninniku: TMI, lets go to the top rows.

Ninniku held Sakura by the waist and led her up. Naruto watched as Sasuke whistled.

Naruto: When did this happen?

Sasuke: What happened? Nothing happened between them.

Naruto: They're NOT going out?

Sasuke: No. Never even dated.

Naruto: Then why is she doing that!?

Sasuke: Popularity. Posing. Pretending to be "his girl" even when he has many. A groupee if you will.

Suddenly, Ino barged in angrily. She points to the area where Sakura and Ninniku are.

Ino: Sakura, how dare you touch my man!?

Sakura: Yours? Ha! As if!

Ino: Wanna fight?

Ninniku: (Whispers to Sakura) Fight for me, will you?

Sakura: Yes dear!

Sakura got up and began walking down the steps. Ninniku then gives her a kick to the rump, making her fall on Ino. A crowd congregates around the two as they stop moving. Sasuke and Naruto peek over to see that they are kissing each other. Instead of drawing back, however, they motion to continue what they are doing.

Sasuke: Yuri! (Faints)

Naruto: Sakura! (Looks up to see that Ninniku is clapping silently as people cheer them on.)

???: Okay, that's enough.

The crowd seperated, leaving the two on the floor. Itachi stood in front of the room with his arms crossed.

Girls: ITACHI-KUN!!!!

Itachi: Sure. Someone wake Sasuke.

Girls: WE WILL ITACHI!!! (All of them kick Sasuke into a concious daze)

Sasuke: What are you doing here?

Itachi: Iruka had a nosebleed so I have to fill in. I am now going to cite the three-man teams aloud. Quet down everyone.

Girls: OKAY!!!

Itachi began reading the teams. Naruto started discussing with Sasuke.

Naruto: Okay, we got a two man team here already.

Sasuke: We just need one more.

Naruto: Sakura! She'd make a great teammate (and mascot babe)

Sasuke:Yeah, some eyecandy would be good.

Itachi: ..., Naruto, and Sasuke. You three make a team.

Sasuke: Wait, can you repeat that?

Itachi: Sakura, .... Chouji, Shikamaru,...

Naruto: Aw crap! It's not Sakura?

Sasuke: Who do we have then?

Itachi: Alright everyone. Meet up with me later in the afternoon. Now is the time to socialize with your new team. Dismissed!

Sasuke: Broth-

In a spin, Itachi disappeared before the boys could get an answer.

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Naruto and Sasuke sat in a tree, thinking surprisingly deep for imbeciles like them.

Sasuke: Okay, we have to scout out our partner now. No one's come by to talk to us.

Naruto: Man, Sakura's not on our team!

Sasuke: Let's go ask around.

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Kiba: Duh?

Naruto: Are you on our team or not?

Kiba: No way in hell would I be in your team!

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Sasuke: Are any of you on my team?

Girls: No.

Sasuke: Damn, what the hell?

Kieru: Trouble?

Sasuke: Kieru! Where've you been?

Kieru: Around.

Sasuke: Wait...are you on our team?

Kieru: Uh...honestly. I don't remember.

Sasuke: What...

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Naruto walked down the main street. He spotted two people talking near the noodle shop. They had weird white eyes. One wore her headband around her neck while the other wore his modified one around his chest like a sash.

Naruto: Hey, are you guys on my team?

Girl: Naruto-kun. (Faints)

Guy: Hinata-sama! Are you alright?

Naruto: What just happened?

Guy: Your presence stains her. Begone!

Naruto: Wow, chillax dude.

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Sasuke: Are you on my team?

Ino: Um, nah Sasuke. Sorry.

Kieru: Are you on mine?

Ino: No, you're with Ninniku I think.

Kieru: Oh, problem solved.

Sasuke: You with Ninniku. That's a pretty big contrast.

Kieru: Eh. Whatever works. Seeya (Runs off)

Sasuke: Seeya then Ino.

Ino: Wait!

Sasuke: Hmm?

Ino: I-I, no, y-you need help?

Sasuke: I'm good. Thanks though.

Ino: Oh...

Sasuke: Something else?

Ino: NO! I mean, nothing. Bye. (Runs off)

Sasuke: Bye?

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Shino: No.

Naruto: Oh.

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The duo met up at the fork in the road.

Sasuke: Find anything?

Naruto: Just that Sakura, Kiba, and Shino are a team.

Sasuke: Ino's with Shikamaru's.

Naruto: Crap. What now?

???: Naruto.

They both turn to see the aforementioned white eyed dude staring at them.

???: I'm sorry from before. My name is Kaji.

Kaji wore only black ninja pants and the headband sash. His short hair parted to one side, glistening with gel.

Naruto: Kaji? What are you doing here?

Kaji: Do you not recognize your teammate?

Naruto + Sasuke: Huh?

???: Kaji-san!

Hinata burst past the trees and behind the Byakuganist.

Kaji: Hinata.

Hinata: Naruto-kun!

Naruto: Hi.

Kaji: Hinata, I have business to attend to. Good bye for now. (Jumps away)

Naruto and Sasuke stare at the girl, whom was intimidated easily. Suddenly, Hinata burst out.

Hinata: I wish us luck as a team! (Runs off)

Sasuke: Hey, did you even see her in the class?

Naruto: I don't recall her at all.

Sasuke: Strange.

Naruto: Indeed.