Chapter 2: Ultimate Power! Enter the King of Demons.

Disclaimer: Holy Freaking Douche Babies

Okay, before I begin, I want to settle something. I'm not dissing Rumiko Takahashi. I love Rumiko Takahashi. She's one of my favorite manga writers of all time (even if Inuyasha was a giant power drill in my skull) I am merely remarking on the fact that most of her work, as far as I have seen, has had endings that weren't very fulfilling for me. Inuyasha never ended at all and left such a bad taste in my mouth that even when I went to read the supposedly better manga, I couldn't get through it. Ranma's ending was going very well right up until that very last page. It seemed rushed, inconclusive, and all-around unfulfilling. I'm not saying I'm a better writer than Rumiko Takahashi. I'm just saying that I didn't particularly care for her ending and I am going to make one that feels a bit more right to me and see if I can entertain some other people with it. With that out of the way, stop your bitching and read the damn fanfiction.

Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Nerima's residents finally managed to calm down. Peace had returned to their quiet streets. By which I mean chaos resumed, so it was business as usual. The cries of frightened women began in a small point on one side of the neighborhood and gradually spread out to the other side like a wave. Leading this wave was a little short blob leaping from rooftop to rooftop, carrying his illicit goods.

Unphased by all of the excitement yesterday, Happosai was back to his old tricks of relieving women of their undergarments. One had to wonder why they were still hanging them outside to dry, knowing the fate that, more likely than not, awaited them. As he flew through the air, carrying a bag of undies bigger than himself, he shouted in delight, "AH HA HA!!! PANTIES!!! PANTIES!!! Oh what a haul! Curious though, normally Ranma would've shown up to ruin my fun by now. Oh well! More spoils to be had! AH HA HA!!!"

Having garnered enough garments to satisfy his lust (for about five minutes) the perverted old master jumped down to the streets and began running home. He was stopped, however, when he rounded a corner and bumped into a tall, mysterious, cloaked figure. "Hey! Watch where you're going!" the old master screamed, frantically trying to recover the spoils he had dropped. The figure remained silent, opening his mouth only to say, "Saotome…"

"What? Oh, you must mean Ranma. He's at the Tendo dojo. 5 blocks down and to the left. Can't miss it." The grandmaster replied, stuffing his treasures back into his sack. "Show me…" the figure commanded ominously. "Eh, sorry, I got a lot more to do today. Places to go, people to see, panties to rub." "I wasn't asking…"

At that, the figure waved his hand, causing Happosai's bag of wonder to burst into flames. Happosai was terribly quiet for a few seconds, before his rage poured out, revealing a massive battle aura. "You're going to regret that…"

A few minutes later, Ranma was out of his bath. His joints and bones still ached, but he felt a bit better, if not a tad melancholy. The once familiar dojo had been decimated by the failed wedding. Ranma carefully made his way around pit-holes and rafters sticking out of the ceiling, walls, and floor.

As he descended the stairs, he took notice of the state of his "family". Genma was crying and mumbling about dojos and training and what-not. His old friend Soun was clinging to a rafter that had come clean off and crying in the fetal position. Kasumi was, as always, happy, cheerful, and completely unphased by the insanity around her. Nabiki was furiously calculating all the money she had lost off of bets over the wedding. It seems she was a true believer in Ranma and Akane's love (and always willing to take a risk) and that she had made bets with 1000 kids, each that Ranma and Akane would go through with it. Akane was the only one having a sane reaction to the travesty, as she sat at the table, trying desperately to hold in the tears. When she saw Ranma, she cast him a weak, but sincere, smile. Ranma, however, could see the pain behind her eyes.

Sitting up and speaking with dignity (or at least as much dignity as one can speak with after clinging to a piece of wood and crying in the fetal position) Soun addressed the family. "Very well, let's see about fixing this dojo. Any ideas?" "I think Ranma should pay for it…" Nabiki droned, "It's all his fault". "What are you talking about!?!" he protested. "You're the one who invited EVERY NUTJOB IN ALL OF JAPAN!!!" "Yes, but you're the one who made them angry," she replied.

"I have a plan!" Genma announced, holding up a poster. "There's a martial arts tournament, with a prize big enough to pay for all of the repairs, with a little left over. Ranma can enter the tournament and win it for us!" "Do it yourself you selfish bastard!" Ranma replied. "How can you speak that way to your own father!?!" Genma shouted. "I raised you!" "Don't remind me!" the young man replied.

"Anyway, I'm done with fighting," Ranma finally said, after a long staring contest with his father. "What!?!" the whole table shouted. "What?" the boy asked in response.

"Ranma… you're Ranma…" Akane said, trying to explain.

"Yeah, so?"

"So, fighting's kind of your thing…"

"Not anymore… I'm done… I'm tired of all this crap… You know what's happened to me because of fighting? I'm a transgender! I get attacked every other day of the week! I have 3 crazy fiancées and someone trying to rape me for each gender! So I'm done. Ranma Saotome is bowing out!"

"But what if someone challenges you to a fight!?!"

"Then they'll have to make new plans…"

"What if I get kidnapped again?"

"I'm not the only one here who can go save you…"

"What about-"

"Look Akane, get this through your thick, macho head. I'm! Done! Fighting!"

Normally, it would be at this point that Ranma would find himself getting very familiar with a mallet. It was strange then, that Akane did not whack him, but merely started walking out of the room. As she left, she turned and muttered "Ranma no baka…" "What's her problem?" he asked the others. "Ranma…" Nabiki began, "you're an idiot…"

A week passed, and somehow the family had gotten the money to repair the house (I suspect prostitution and/or loaning Genma to a local zoo). Still, there was an air of tension throughout the house. Without Ranma fighting anymore, the residents of the dojo had begun to grow weary. Only when he stopped fighting did they realize how much they depended on him. Without Ranma to beat up the repo men, they had to actually start paying the bills. Without Ranma to beat up Kuno, the blue blunder started popping up more and more to harass Akane (and give contact harassment to the rest of the house.) Without Ranma to beat up those idiots at Cartoon Network, Toonami got cancelled and replaced by some bastardized version with action movies that had all the actual action edited out, meaning the Naruto filler would take even longer to end.

The air of tension was cut, however, with a metaphorical knife in the form of a knock on the door. "Akane!!! I got your letter! I got here as soon as I could!!!" the knocker screamed as the aforementioned girl opened the door. "Ryoga, I handed that letter to you a week ago asking you to come by later that day… and you were 5 feet from the door…" "I got a little lost, but I'm here."

With a weary sigh, Akane let the eternally lost martial artist in. "Thanks for coming…" "No problem. Is it true?" the boy whispered to his secret admiree. "Yes," she replied, "Ranma really has given up fighting. He didn't even fight you-know-who when he burst through the wall and started molesting me." "Who?" Ryoga asked. "You can't say his name, or he'll show up." She answered.

As if he magically knew they were talking about him, Kuno burst through the wall. "Did I hear someone call for the Blue Thunder!?!" "No Kuno!" Akane shouted. "Oh Akane Tendo, abandoned by that dog Saotome! Here! Let me clench you to my bosom!" Kuno screamed as he proceeded to molest Akane. "You don't have a bosom Kuno… get… off…" she muttered angrily.

At that moment, Ranma walked by. Observing the scene, he disinterestedly droned, "Hey Ryoga. Hey Akane. Hey Upperclassman Kuno…" "Hello, Saotome…" Kuno replied cheerily, still grasping Akane. "Will you… GET OFF!!!" the young Tendo girl screamed, letting forth her legendary temper in the form of a kick that sent Kuno flying.

As Ranma walked off, Ryoga whispered to Akane, "It's even worse than you said… Hang on; I'll have Ranma back to his old self in no time." "Thanks Ryoga, you really are a sweetheart. I don't know what Ranma would do without you." Akane replied sweetly, taking her friend in a completely platonic hug. 'I will never forget this day… as long as I live…' Ryoga thought, deep in bliss.

After collecting himself, Ryoga made his way over to his friend and rival. "Hey Jerk…" "Hey…" Ranma replied, ignoring the insult.

"So, uh… Akane tells me you're not fighting anymore…"

"Yep…"

"Why…?"

"Because it's not worth it. All fighting ever does is make more problems for me…"

"Damn it Ranma! What the hell's wrong with you!?!"

"What do you mean?"

"You're so out of character! You've given up on fighting! You don't care when Kuno molests Akane! You've lost all passion for anything! It's like you're in a bad fanfiction or something."

At that, a strange laughter erupted out of nowhere, dying down after a few seconds.

"That was weird…"

"Don't change the subject…"

"Look, I'm just tired of dealing with all the crap, okay? I've had to deal with more shit than anyone should. Sue me for being tired of it! You know what!?! The universe wins! I don't wanna play anymore! The game's not fun! It never was! I'm done. Thanks for all the laughs; have a good one."

"Ranma! You make me sick! You never gave up on anything in your entire life! You're a pathetic shell of your former self!"

"Oh, speaking of shells, I'm hungry. Who's up for seafood?"

Before Ryoga could yell at Ranma more, a withered old husk floated in through the window. It began coughing, which caused the smoke it was covered in to fly all throughout the room. "It's Happosai!" Akane shouted. "He's… *cough*… he's coming… for you…" was all that the old lecher managed to squeeze out before fainting.

"Okay, so my vote's for seafood. What do you want Akane?"

Wow… creepy… That's chapter 2, take it for what it is. Next time, the Demon King Noboru makes his presence known. His demand? The head of Ranma Saotome, with or without the body. Ranma's friends rush in to defend their friend, but Ranma still doesn't care. Can Akane convince him to go back to his rude, overconfident old self in time to save the day, or will the Demon King's evil plan come to fruition. Find out next time! Until then, take care and God bless you all.

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