CONTEST CONTINUED…

(First, see the prelude to Chapter 9: Under Cover Of Darkness. There the contest and rules are explained. I'm… just not posting them twice)

There were no winners… yet… But you're all really close so I'll just give you a few more days with these hints.

HINT #1: The song was first released on an album that came out the same year as the artist's death.

HINT #2: The artist was born in the UK sometime during the general timeframe of The Blitz.

You are now at a point where you can go to Wikipedia for a few minutes and figure out who said artist is. Now go find the song. Feel free to use search engines or any resource, you wouldn't be cheating.

Oh and another thing…

Fanfiction request clarification: I do not count Mac as a crossover character. Even though he technically is.

***

Thank you Lovebug21, tbsavafob, daxy, and Jessi84 for the reviews.

Announcement: I have a poll up (still). It has to do with the Halloween ficlet coming out late next month. Go vote.

I do not own or claim to own CSI: Miami characters. I do not own or claim to own CSI: NY characters. This is fanmade and I make absolutely no profit off of this. I do this for my own amusement.

***

Chapter Twelve: Breakfast

Horatio stepped out of the bathroom, clean shaven and still clad in his robe. The smell of coffee and pancakes filled the room, mixing with the scent of burning wood in the rekindled fireplace. Rick looked over at his lover from the kitchen, still a little shaken about what had transpired.

"You're just in time," Rick smiled as he placed a plate of pancakes on the counter.

Horatio walked over to Rick, pulled him in close and kissed him gently. Rick nuzzled Horatio's neck contentedly as the redhead took a quick glance around the kitchen.

"Rick!" Horatio groaned, indicating the counter, now covered with flour, egg shells and sugar. "You made a mess!"

"Yeah…well… you now have a limp," Rick stammered out after realizing that he really had no excuse for not cleaning up.

"You make a valid argument," Horatio chuckled.

"Now get out of my kitchen, sit down, and have some pancakes. I have to clear off the counter".

"Alright," Horatio said stepping out of the kitchen area, "but no promises on the 'sitting down' part".

Rick smirked at Horatio before turning to clean off the counter. As he dusted flour into the garbage bags he felt his hand tremble and his stomach churn. His breathing grew labored and his palms began to sweat again. He was overwhelmed with guilt. There was something he had been keeping from Horatio for too long, and something that would be a burden until he came to terms with it and talked to his new lover. He just wasn't quite sure when to tell Horatio, or how to tell him for that matter. He felt that if he kept this from Horatio that it would be the same thing as lying to him, something he knew he could never do. If you truly love Horatio, a voice inside him whispered, then you will tell him the truth.

Running a wet rag over the counter, Rick silently cursed that it was clean so quickly. He needed more time to think and to calm himself down. Slowly, he draped the rag over the faucet and turned to face Horatio.

The redhead stood there, nibbling happily at his breakfast and sipping at his coffee. He was at a state of peace that Stetler had never seen him in before. It was like all the weight that life had put on his shoulders had been lifted and he could be young again. Even when Horatio was with Marisol, Rick had never seen him so happy. He didn't want to risk taking such freedom away, but it would be wrong to keep Horatio in the dark for much longer. It just wouldn't be fai-

"-your cooking is absolutely delicious; you know that, right?" Horatio said to break the silence, interrupting Rick's thoughts.

"Thank you, Horatio," Rick said, his voice shaking slightly as he turned to face his lover.

Horatio took a few more bites before he looked up at Rick. His face was pale and his eyes looked slightly sunken. His body swayed and rocked, as if he was about to lose his balance if he hadn't braced himself to the counter.

"Are you alright?" Horatio asked, putting down his food.

"I'm fine, why?" Stetler responded, his voice still shaking.

"Because it looks like you're about to be sick," the redhead said, quickly stepping into the kitchen by Rick's side.

"I…I…" Rick stopped as he felt bile rise in the back of his throat. Never have his nerves acted out so violently against him. He shivered uncomfortably with the sensation.

Horatio placed his hands on Rick's shoulders, trying to calm him down, having no idea that he was making things worse. Pained, Rick looked down into Horatio's magnificently blue and trusting eyes. He winced in pain as he felt a sharp churn in his stomach.

"Come here," Horatio said, gently pulling him towards the sofa.

"No!" Rick was able to shout through the fog of his own confusion, only to be embarrassed at how loud his cry was, "I mean… I'm fine".

"No you aren't, now come here".

Rick was led towards the sofa and sat down. He closed his eyes, let his head roll back and groaned in discomfort. The next thing he felt was a damp washcloth being placed on his forehead and Horatio's hands rub his shoulders.

"You'll be okay, Rick," Horatio said gently, "now talk to me, what's happening? Do you feel at all numb?"

"I-I-I… I just need to lie down," Rick was finally able to muster out.

He slowly lowered himself into a horizontal position on the couch. Horatio rushed over to his side and held his hand, kissing it tenderly. Rick winced and turned away when he felt how sweet and gentle Horatio's love could be.

"Horatio," Rick gasped with what little breath he had, "I don't want you to see me like this". He drew a quick breath in through his teeth and winced and his stomach churned violently again. "It's… It's me. Go back to your breakfast. I should be back to normal soon enough".

Uneasy, but wanting to make Rick comfortable, Horatio stood up and went back to his plate. Rick winced as he tried to gather up his courage to speak to his lover; to tell him the truth.

***

His stomach regained constancy around the time Horatio finished with his breakfast and washed the plate. He sat up on the couch, looking over his shoulder at the gorgeous man he spent the night with. Horatio turned to see that the color had returned to Rick's face.

"You feeling much better?"

Lying, Rick nodded and smiled weakly at Horatio. The redhead took the damp washcloth from Rick's hand and kissed him gently.

"So… dizzy spells or what?" Horatio asked him lightly.

Rick looked up into his lover's beautifully blue eyes, filled with nothing but trust. His stomach churned again, but he pressed on.

"Horatio," he finally forced out, no going back now, "there's something… very important that you need to know. And I… I'm not too proud to admit it". He breathed heavily as his hands began to tremble again. "Horatio. I… I…" he hung his head, "This wasn't at all random, you know that".

The redhead cocked his head slightly, not quite sure if he wanted to hear what was coming.

"The woman who drew the names, she… she was a good friend of mine back in high school; her name's Victoria Scully. We kept in touch; she was one of the few close friends I had ever told about you. She had an idea of how important you are to me and she… well… after consulting me… well… after I told her to… she… she fixed the drawing".

Horatio sat there quietly, not facing or looking at Rick. Finally he turned his head and looked at Rick though tired eyes.

"You set me up?" Horatio whispered.

"Horatio, I didn't mean to cause you any harm-"

"-And how many more times are you planning on saying that before I start to believe you again?"

He spoke quietly as he turned his head away. Rick didn't know what to think, except that his heart would probably ached a lot less if Horatio just straight out yelled at him. This was torture, but yet he felt that he deserved it.

"H, I-"

"-Rick," Horatio broke in before he trailed off, losing himself in thought. After a few long moments he finally spoke again. "I… I need to be alone right now".

He stood up and walked back towards the bedroom, still limping slightly. He looked back, just for a moment, to see Rick shaking with his face buried in his hands. A soft sob broke the silence as Horatio left the room.

Why do you do these things, Rick? Stetler heard his mind whisper to him, How could you just stand there and let things happen? You say you love him, but look at yourself, why can't you be happy to just see him happy?

"I could," Rick whispered, retorting his own thoughts.

Bullshit. If that were true you would have let him just hang around the hotel with Mac, or better yet put them in this cabin together. But no, you had to take this situation and just make sure things went your way. Did you even once think about what Horatio might feel about this? He almost died, Rick. And it would have been your fault. And then what happened in the shower… seriously, what the fuck were you thinking?

"Things never meant to get this far".

Oh yeah, you "just wanted Horatio to see things from your perspective as an IAB agent". Don't lie to yourself, you just wanted to get in his pants. Well congratulations, mission accomplished. Why do you always have to force your goddamn opinions on everyone anyways? That's why nobody likes you. You're a pushy egomaniacal bastard, that's what you are. How could Horatio ever love somebody like you?

"I could change for him".

Nothing could ever change you, Rick. It doesn't matter if the world depended on it or just your precious little Horatio depended on it; you can't change. Accept it. You're going to die with no legacy and not a friend in the world. And no matter how much you wish to change that, you know you can't. Maybe you could have when you were younger, but not now. Now you're too old and bitter to really care about anything anymore, and you're only 52. God, you can be so fucking pathetic.

"I would give anything just to see him that happy again", Rick said absently, thinking back on this morning.

Forget it, Rick. If you really loved him you wouldn't drag him down with you. In fact, he would most likely be a lot happier if you were just out of the picture. I suggest that you just make him a sandwich around noon, when it's time you go you hand over the map and your coat (because it's your fault that his is at the bottom of the lake) and just try to forget all this ever happened.

"Horatio's why I get up in the morning. It's been that way for years. If I can't be with him, I… I really just don't see the point".

Then go ahead and do yourself in. But how about, when you do that, you for once in your life think of Horatio first, don't leave him scarred. Wait till he has forgotten you. Don't worry, it shouldn't take too long.