"This is boring," whined Ichimaru Gin as he slumped lower in his chair, breaking the what must now be at least fifteen minute silence.
Nanao had merely been sipping her tea and watching Aizen, who had been doing the exact same thing. Both turned at once to look at Ichimaru, the latter's trademark grin now almost gone and a frown on his face as he twirled his teacup around on his hand.
"When are they coming, Aizen-taichou? I'm bored."
The teacup rolled from his wrist to his shoulder in a show of brilliant coordination before rolling back down and being caught by slim, long fingers which tapped loudly on the ceramic surface.
"You, my dear friend, are abso-friggin-lutely bonkers," he sighed as he flipped open the laptop, hooking the earpiece into his ear.
A chuckle on the other side and he sighed again. "You'd think a senior officer like yourself would tire of such missions, but noo, I turn around and you run off chasing missing people in my car."
"Kuchiki's car what? SHUNSUI! Honestly. Spare some thought for the situation, alright? If you called me just to waste my very precious time, then I will to hang up on you so that I can devote my full attention to the actual mission, alright?"
He sucked in a deep breath. "Now, which part of the building are you in? And don't you dare repeat what I think I heard you just say. You think I can't hear what you're mumbling under your… I AM NOT A MOTHERHEN!"
The plastic door rattled on its hinges and a light swear word was heard.
Kira Izuru ducked out of the men's washroom after casting a shocked glance back at the cubicle next to the one he had just occupied.
He was going to do his best to forget that he had just heard that. Yes, yes. It was not good to know that your boss was going crazy in the cubicle next to yours while doing goodness knows what with someone who was not even there.
Or maybe he had just been hallucinating, just like that time he had seen Ichimaru-taicho disappear out of the building and into a very familiar person's car.
Yes, he was definitely hallucinating.
It would do good for him to return back to the meeting room, sit down next to Hisagi-senpai and wait for his orders.
The new worksite was quite clean, Unohana Retsu noted, small confident footsteps bringing her around the white-sanded construction site, overshadowed by the skyscraper just next to it, in the middle of what seemed to be nowhere.
Her modest grey Lincoln was parked behind a stack of concrete blocks, good for shielding it from view as well as any possible attack, not that she would expect that there would be anything powerful enough to destroy a car.
The flashy red SUV carrying Zaraki Kenpachi whooshed on past her as Kusajishi Yachiru waved at Isane from the window with what looked like extremely colorful fingers.
They were right on time.
The initiation of the new recruits had not gone too well, from what she had heard. What was supposed to have been a routine mission had quickly turned into something a little less innocent, and the next thing she knew, Ukitake and Kyouraku-kun had politely requested her presence here.
Her presence as well as that of Zaraki Kenpachi, Kurotsuchi Mayuri, and Kuchiki Byakuya.
All for the new recruits.
Kurotsuchi-san's black minivan with dark-tinted windows bumped past along on the uneven terrain, and she could see the white Lamborghini Murcielago cruising to the left.
She rounded yet another mountain of gravel and white sand, and a red patch on the ground alerted her to the presence of someone else.
"Oh dear me. What do we have here." She knelt down to feel the boy's pulse, taking note of his almost glaring orange hair. A slight smile came to her face as she turned. "Isane, do you think you could fetch me the bandages? I think Kurosaki-san might require some."
"Ken-chan?"
Said man grunted in reply as he wrestled with the damn car to keep it straight on the incredibly bumpy ground.
"You sure it's okay to leave Baldy and Feathers behind?" Kusajishi Yachiru bounced around the interior of the SUV, colored toys flying around and constantly obscuring the rear mirror. "They won't miss you, Ken-chan?"
"'S fine, Yachiru. 'Sides, the old man recommended that we leave them behind, 'cos they ain't gonna do any fightin' when I'm around, right?"
Yachiru pouted slightly, looking only a little less hesitant. "But… it's Baldy and Feathers…"
"They'll be fine, Yachiru. They're old enough to take care of themselves. And ya know Ikkaku will throw a fit if he knew ya worried about him, right?"
A small, silent pause as Yachiru pondered his words, before a tiny pair of hands flung themselves around his neck and a small body collided against his chest a little too forcefully, slightly winding him though he'd never admit it. "Yah! Ken-chan's the best!"
"Hn." Kenpachi resisted the urge to cuddle Yachiru, instead scowling harder at the white and rather unforgivingly tall sand dunes which were causing his Sports Utility Vehicle quite a bit of trouble.
Yachiru lapsed into silence as the car stopped rocking a little and they passed by what seemed to be the crazy scary healer and her subordinate.
Man, that woman was freakily creepily scary. Kind of like a really, really dangerous mother, actually.
It had been less than a month ago that he had been perched nervously by Yachiru's bedside, waiting for her to get better from that goddamn blast.
"Ken-chan?" Yachiru murmured groggily from the bed, pink hair contrasting with the plain whiteness of the sheets, blanket and pillow.
He nearly jumped to his feet and laughed.
Instead, he blinked rather pitifully, stretching out a large hand to gently, hesitantly place over her much smaller one, almost afraid that an exuberant greeting would hurt her.
A small smile came to her face as she giggled weakly, turning slightly and falling back asleep.
He scowled as he sat back down, lapsing a little into not-so-distant memories.
The first time Yachiru had stirred, he had actually leapt up and tried to pick her up and hug her because by the gods she had him so worried and angry he thought he would simply explode from all the tension.
A cold something against his back and a steelier tone wrapped in a soft calming voice had stopped him, just millimeters away from hugging Yachiru to an inch of her life.
Unohana Retsu, graceful healer extraordinaire by day and creepy motherhen by night swept past him, bringing with her a whole host of silent white-clad subordinates.
Half of whom somehow managed to shoo and guide him out of the room, plonk him down on the cold plastic bench outside and give him strict orders to go and get food and get changed.
Which he promptly ignored.
He had sat outside for what seemed like half an eternity before the head honcho herself came out of the room, a delicate (delicately sinister, he swore) smile on her face, proclaiming that "Yachiru-chan will be just fine."
And that, "However, should you find the need to enthusiastically attempt once more to glomp her within an inch of her life, be prepared that I can and will murder you in your sleep."
And also, "We have put in much effort to ensure Yachiru-chan's speedy recovery to excellent health, so don't. you. dare. impede the process, Zaraki Kenpachi."
And the last sentence, "You should go get changed, take a meal and have some rest. Yachiru-chan will be a little groggy from the medicines, and will most likely only awake again tomorrow."
He had ignored her just as he had ignored her subordinates, but a firm grip on his shoulder and he found himself flying into the opposite wall, creating a surprisingly soft thud. (Which he felt through all twenty four of his vertebrae, his sacrum and his coccyx all at once.)
"Go rest. Now."
He had gone, ribs aching and elbow stinging, to change, shower and eat.
Of course, Yachiru had recovered just as the she-demon had said she would, and was perkier and happier than she had been for much of the previous month, most of which she had spent unconscious. (And he had spent out of the organization looking for revenge.)
He had gotten her discharged from the medical facility as quickly as he could possibly manage, because that woman crept him out of his skin, even though Yachiru really seemed to love her.
But never mind that.
He now lived in eternal fear of Unohana Retsu.
Oh sure, he would trust her with any wounds and illnesses and stuff like that, but trust was a heck load different from whether he feared her or not. And besides, he liked to think that if he ever was injured enough to need treatment, he would hopefully be unconscious.
Fear was a bit of an understatement.
It was more like a mixture of fear, admiration, awe and respect that he felt towards the woman who was just about slightly taller than two-thirds his height.
The exact same feelings as the rest of the world and the known universe had for her.
Scary.
Nope, Zaraki Kenpachi thought to himself. Best not to think about it anymore.
What was over was over, and he really needed to think of something else. Something that would erase that darned inferiority complex he had somehow developed around that woman.
He needed to think of someone he could make fun of.
Preferably someone shorter, girlier and snobbier.
He smirked to himself, though it looked more like a bloodthirsty sneer as he contemplated the highly amusing idea of Kuchiki's Lamborghini stuck in a sand dune.
Serve him right, that proud… thing.
Besides, if he had that kind of cash, (and if Yachiru was ten years older) he wouldn't get a Lamborghini, oh no.
There were faster cars out there, and a Zonda was practically screaming his name.
Take that, Kuchiki.
Nanao was well and truly bored now. She had actually contemplated all seventy-two possible scenarios that could happen if she attempted to escape, and every single one of them involved someone dying or getting severely injured.
Someone on her side, that was.
She had promptly decided to wait for rescue as any normal damsel in distress would, except that she was balancing the budget for next year in her head and doing some logistics planning at the same time.
So after what was probably about two hours of sitting around and taking tiny sips at what was truly delicious tea, she found herself with nothing left to do. The budget was balanced, all the different costs were accounted for, and the logistics, if carried out that way, would be perfectly guarded and moved.
She was dreadfully, dreadfully bored, though probably not as bored as Ichimaru looked.
He was whistling away as he rolled his cylindrical teacup from one shoulder to another. The man who appeared to be Aizen Sousuke was unflappable as usual, calmly sipping his tea and staring alternately at Ichimaru and her.
Now, Nanao was no genius, but she could model a couple of physics problems in her head. The first problem involved the rotation of the teacup around a round table, which was then extended to the elliptical table, and…
She was almost beginning to wish that something, anything was happening. By the gods, this was a terrible method of torture or extracting of information. Please, let something happen, let something happen, let something happen!
Nothing did, and after fifteen minutes of attempting to calculate the coefficient of kinetic friction of the stone surface [in a very crude manner] by sliding her cup over it, her shoulders slumped slightly in mild defeat.
[Her posture was no longer as perfect as it had been about three hours ago.]
She sighed. Aizen smirked and sipped his tea. Ichimaru pretended not to notice. This was incredibly boring…
Ooh, was that a crash in the distance?
The teacup stopped rolling on Ichimaru's sleeves, instead coming to a rest on the hollow of his shoulder, which he chest-bumped up and into his hands. Quicker than Nanao had ever seen the man move, he rose and was at the door, turning around and grinning to Aizen.
"I'll go check it out, ya, Aizen-taicho?"
Aizen nodded and inwardly, Nanao groaned.
Now she was stuck in a room with only a completely boring person to look at.
At least Ichimaru had been remotely interesting.
She slumped forward to lean her elbows on the table in what she knew was terrible posture.
Rangiku twiddled her thumbs as she waited for Toushiro to return to the office. He did not normally take more than half an hour for any breaks, not even lunch, not even to visit poor Hinamori who was hospitalized for trying to commit suicide after that horrible Aizen incident that had started all this.
The poor girl was much better now, but that bastard Aizen had really done a pretty job with her, imprinting so deeply that even today, she twitched when a reference was made to him or his corporation. It would take a long while for Momo to return back to normal, but she would never be able to actively and properly participate in the organization's work again.
But that was not the point. The point was that Toushiro was currently missing, and that she could not find Nanao either.
Little Boy Wonder had requested that she take a maximum of fifteen more minutes to search for Nanao, after which she "better get back to the office because we have a lot of work to do, Matsumoto".
So she had done exactly that, but poor Toushiro looked so stressed lately that she just had to help him out a little. Nanao was a big girl and could take care of herself. She'd find her way back eventually.
But where was Toushiro?
"All systems clear," Jyuushiro's voice echoed out of their earpieces, "You're ready to roll."
Shiba Kaien beamed at Hitsugaya over his sister who also looked a little too happy for the occasion.
Heck, even Kyouraku-san was grinning like a madman as well.
For the life of him, Toushiro could not figure out why. It made no sense. This was a hostage rescue mission carried out in absolute secrecy such that no one should ever need to know that they were here...
An explosion rocked the room that Kyouraku-san had just closed the door on, just to their left. Toushiro's jaw dropped as Shiba Kuukaku grinned maniacally.
Had they really just detonated a pack of TNT in the previous room to draw attention towards themselves so that someone, preferably him, could sneak past the guards [and failing that, knock them out or kill them] to save Nanao-san from the evil clutches of Aizen Sousuke?
Oh dear god, deliver him from this all.
What had he done to deserve such treatment?
[And why had he agreed in the first place?]
The Pancor Jackhammers loaded themselves as Kyouraku-san headed left at the first turn.
Kuukaku whipped out a flamethrower, much to Toushiro's horror as she turned right at the next turn.
Kaien waved him a jaunty goodbye as he sauntered down the next left turn.
Which left him to head down the right turn that was left.
His teeth closed over the hilt of a kunai as he gently tugged the rope dart out of his back pocket.
Time to roll.
[Without slipping.]
He sniggered inwardly at the extremely nerdy physics joke before catching himself hurriedly. He was supposed to have outgrown that phase three years ago.
Focus, Toushiro. Focus.