5/25/09

A/N: Is anyone overly weirded out yet? If you are please send me some sort of message telling me your feelings. I would absolutely love to put your two cents into my story somehow. But for now, I hope you enjoy this mess of insanity as we continue.

Disclaimer: I do not under any circumstances own Drizzt and Co. they belong to R.A. Salvatore. Anyone you do not recognize is most likely mine. If you get confused look at my other stories. I also own all of my spelling errors.

Warning: Excessive use of foul language (In case you haven't already noticed), violent ideas, violence etc.

Okay, I think that covers it. Enjoy.

Chapter Three: Surprise, surprise...

It was hot and there was sand everywhere. She was in the desert again, walking towards the mud colored buildings slowly rising above the tawny dunes. As always when she passed by, tiny, dark skinned children tried to grasp her worn cloak begging for food or money. As always, she did not stop to regard them. There was nothing she could do even though she wanted to help them. That was the way it was here and she thought it better not to tease them. Anything she gave them would be taken away from them in short order by someone else.

And besides, she had a job to do.

Her target was located on the other side of the small shanty town of the larger city. This one was lucky to be afforded a fine view of the sea. The ramshackle hut that served as his home was empty when she stepped in. He was not at home. She chose to wait for him as she did not have anything to do. She didn't really feel like going out and hunting him down. She didn't need the attention.

Her patience was rewarded a few hours later when the man stepped in: a low level thief working between guilds. He heaved a bag of gold onto the flimsy table which almost collapsed under its weight. She made a note of that quickly but did not step out from her hiding place. The man was obviously drunk, the way he swayed about the room gave that away easily. There would hardly be a hint of satisfaction from this job. His smell was sickening. Killing him would be doing him a favor.

He finally turned his back to her hiding place and she silently stepped out. The man was so lost in his drunken state that he did not even hear her dagger whistling through the air before it struck through his back. He fell to the ground oblivious that he had even been killed. She wiped the dagger clean on his trousers and left as silently as she had come. No one would ever know better.

Kitana woke after only two hours of sleep. She had set her alarm clock for six in the morning and so it was going off. She pushed the button silencing it completely as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Without saying a word, she went to her private bathroom for a quick shower. She was back out within ten minutes. The young woman told the four companions to turn around so she could get dressed and they instantly complied. She took some fresh clothes out of her drawer and put them on then, letting them know that she was dressed proceeded to go about re-braiding her long blonde hair.

"Do you normally sleep in your clothes?" Jarlaxle asked in the same casual tone he used a few hours before.

"No. Normally I sleep in my underwear," She replied still somewhat sleepily. "But since you guys are here I don't need to further justify her way of thinking. You guys want some coffee?"

Entreri yawned and stretched luxuriously. "Sounds good."

Kitana turned to Jarlaxle. "Let me out and I'll make some. I want to get started on my housework too."

The five went downstairs to the kitchen as Kitana explained that her grandmother was still sleeping and would not be up for a few hours. After she woke she would bathe and go about selecting an ensemble for the day and painting her face. That process would take about an hour. After she was ready for the day she would scream down the stairs to Kitana to get her breakfast ready.

"I like to get up early so I can have at least a small part of the day when I'm not getting yelled at," she confessed. "I don't get a lot of sleep so I take this time to get some rest."

"What did you mean when you said that you don't want to justify her way of thinking?" Drizzt asked as politely as he could.

Kitana stared into the hot dark liquid in her cup. "She says I'm a whore and she believes it. That's why she got rid of the last guard I had. She told everyone he was sleeping with me so she fired him. She was just jealous that he wasn't looking at her." She took a sip of her coffee and continued, "We never did anything. He tried to once and I put a knife to his throat. After that he was terrified of me. She likes to invite a lot of guys here too, trying to see if I'll do anything. She calls them suitors. She tells them to come here and have fun with me and then she says that I'm the one calling them over and they go along with it. So I scare them all away." Again Kitana remembered the last one and it brought a small smile to her face.

"This happens frequently?" the drow ranger continued.

"The last one was a paladin about a month ago. I managed to make him run out of the house screaming, she hasn't had one here since."

Entreri looked at her with an amused expression. "You scared away a paladin?" She giggled into her coffee.

"Yeah," she said putting the cup down and wiping her mouth off. "He came up into my room but I knew he was coming beforehand so when he came in I was expecting him. I started out making growling noises and talking about drinking blood. He told me that I was possessed and I said I wasn't. Then he called me a demon which made me laugh. He took out one of those crosses and held it in my face, I grabbed it and told him that I was going to eat his soul. He was surprised when it didn't burn me. I chucked it at him while he was running down the entry path. That was a fun day."

"I'll bet it was," Entreri snorted. "I hate paladins. What else have you done to these 'suitors'? he asked surprising the others. They had not been expecting him to continue. Then again, she was talking about fun ways to scare people which usually put the assassin in a good mood. And the last story was pretty funny.

Kitana thought for a minute. There were a lot of stories she could tell them. In the last four months her grandmother had called over thirty guys. "Well, there was this one time she called over the oldest son from the family across the street," she said finally settling on one. "It was about three months ago. I was in the kitchen at the time and I didn't find out about him beforehand. He came in here and the first thing he did was grab my ass. I turned around to slap him but he stepped back. Then I remembered that there was a bottle of cooking oil next to me I took the top off and threatened him with it, I told him it was acid. He backed up but didn't leave so I grabbed a bottle of hot sauce and told him it was acid too and it would melt his face off with one drop. I threw the cooking oil on him and he ran out of the kitchen screaming to his mother that I was trying to kill him."

"You scare away all of the men that come here?" Jarlaxle inquired curiously.

"Mostly. I was planning to scare you guys too but it didn't work."

"Why didn't it work?" the mercenary continued almost teasingly.

"Because I changed my mind about you guys," she stated simply. "If you were like any of the others you would have been all over me the minute we were in my room. I can tell you like women a lot but you didn't try anything."

"How were you planning to scare us away?"

"I don't know," she mused. "I figured that I would see how you were first and then make a plan. I could still try if you want." She turned to Entreri who still looked fairly amused. "Do you think I could scare you?"

He shook his head. "No"

Kitana shrugged her shoulders. "Oh, well then, I have to do the dishes and get cooking. You guys want anything?"

As predicted her grandmother was screaming at her from the top of the stairs at ten in the morning. Kitana asked Jarlaxle to kindly inform her that her breakfast was already on the table and she was getting the juice ready right now. His charm effectively silenced her ranting and she did not say a word to Kitana as her juice was delivered with her morning tea. The young woman did however catch a small self directed statement from her grandmother as she left the room.

"It's about time she did something right."

Kitana ignored this statement as she did all the others. There was no point in saying anything back, that would only cause more trouble. There would be enough yelling later on. She went back to the kitchen where the others were still sitting around the small round table. They had not asked her for much at all and she was happy for that. A small breakfast was all that they had wanted and it was the least she could do.

She explained to them that she would spend the better part of the next four hours in the kitchen. Cleaning and cooking were the biggest chores she had. If the day went on like normal she would leave the kitchen in three hours to give her grandmother lunch then spend the hour after that resuming what she was doing prier. After the fourth hour, she would leave the kitchen and go clean up random messes around the house. This could take anywhere from one to two hours depending on who was there. Then, it was back to the kitchen to make dinner. Dinner usually took about an hour to prepare, sometimes more because different things took different amounts of time to make and her grandmother decided the meal. Dinner was also a 'family affair', as they had seen the other night she was supposed to sit there and not say anything. Most of the time her grandmother had five to fifteen guests at the table. The event lasted another hour.

After dinner at about seven or eight Kitana would once again in the kitchen to clean up if she hadn't already and put away any left overs. Her grandmother didn't need to know about that though. As it was she was an extremely wasteful person. Kitana never knew how many people would be at the table on a given night, so she put away left overs and mixed them into another night's meal. Left overs also made convenient snacks and, if redone the right way she could get an entirely new meal to serve. She made it a point to tell them that they could help themselves to anything at any time just as long as they told her.

When Jarlaxle asked if their breakfast that morning had been made with left overs she told him no, it had been completely fresh. Their meals yesterday had been made with left overs from about two days ago. She told them not to worry about it she took great care in storing things so no one would get poisoned or something like that. If she had even the slightest inkling that something was not safe to eat, she threw it out. And very few things were in the refrigerator for more than a week.

"So most of the day will be in the kitchen," Entreri summarized.

"Pretty much," Kitana replied. "I have to. Every day she wants at least three four course meals. Breakfast and lunch aren't that bad, those are supposed to be small courses anyway if it isn't for a formal event. Dinner is always formal here unless it's just her and me, which wasn't often. She likes to make a show of herself. One time she called over thirty people without telling me beforehand, I got stuck in here for almost four hours doing nothing but cooking. Cleaning up after was a nightmare. After that I started spying on her to see if she would have anyone over and how many people."

"She doesn't know you spy on her?" Entreri asked, not about to be surprised with the answer.

"No. That stupid bitch couldn't tell a rock from a scone," Kitana laughed when she realized her play on words. "She doesn't pay any attention to me unless she feels like complaining about something. Or if she's the center of attention and she wants me to look worse."

"And how does she do that?" Jarlaxle stepped in.

"She'll go on about my clothes and stuff like that. Or how I always wear my hair the same way. And then the whole 'she never does anything and I think my life is in danger with her here' bit.

"What's wrong with what you're wearing?" Drizzt asked.

"I'm wearing mens' clothes can't you tell?" Kitana asked sarcastically.

"I don't see a problem." the ranger replied confused. "So what if they're mens' clothes plenty of women wear them."

Kitana didn't disagree. "That's what I said. Unfortunately she likes to go on about me not being a 'proper lady'. All of her friends agree that I should be much more feminine so it's always a favorite topic of conversation." She turned to Kimmuriel for the first time that day, "How come you never say anything?" Her question clearly caught him off guard, much to everyone else's amusement.

"I don't usually like to unless it's something important to me," he replied when the shock wore off. He had been absorbed in something else entirely when she had turned to him. Had she known what he was attempting to do? He shook the notion off, how could she possibly?

Kitana accepted his answer easily enough. She knew he wasn't the whole truth but she wasn't about to tell them everything about herself so she let it slip to be fair. She had sensed something strange in the moment of his silence. It felt like he was tying to do something to her almost. But why would he want to do anything to her? She decided to switch the focus of heir conversation. Time for Kimmuriel to talk about himself. "So what's your story?" she asked catching him off guard again.

"What do you mean?" he returned with a raised eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes. "You know, where'd you come from, what do you do now. Things like that. Oh! I know, how come you're so weird?"

"You are calling me weird? You are the one that's weird."

"Yes I am, but that's besides the point. Everyone else has talked about themselves now it's your turn. You were doing something weird to me a minute ago and I want to know about it." She watched with more than a little satisfaction that Kimmuriel's ebony skin paled lightly. If he wasn't a drow it would have been far more obvious.

The psionicist took a deep breath and prepared to give himself away. "I've been sensing strange energies around you and I wanted to see what they were."

"You can sense those things too?" her question surprised him.

"I can," he replied. "If you are really that bent on knowing why I am so 'weird' it is because I am a psionicist. I was trying to look inside your mind because I received a strange vision from you this morning."

"What vision?" It was her turn to pale.

"I saw a woman in a desert on a mission to kill someone." Anything else he might have said was abruptly cut off as she slapped him across the face.

"Stay out of my head," she demanded coldly. She refused to speak to any of the companions for the rest of the day.

She was in the same place as before. The city in the desert loomed before her in all of its mud colored splendor. Most of the buildings only looked poor though. Plain wrappings hiding the riches within. Guild houses. She was heading to one right now. She had to collect her payment for her last job.

She entered the grandly decorated room casually. The finery meant nothing at all to her and she honestly believed people would be better off without it. The guild master would beg to differ though. He liked showing off his status. He thought it would intimidate people.

It didn't intimidate her. She ignored it completely.

Gold passed through their hands without incident. She left as casually as she came.

In the alleyway behind the guild house a foolish thief tried to jump her. Her dagger flashed through the air before him and cut a thin smile across his throat. She looked down at him scornfully, a member of the guild she had just been employed by. She left his body on the front steps with a deep red lip print burnt onto one cheek. It was her warning to the guild master. He had been foolish to try to cross her.

She walked a little way down the next street to a tavern she knew well. The door opened for her just as a smallish, dark haired man was leaving. She knew who he was and stepped out of his way, he didn't bother to look back at her.

Kitana woke up sweating heavily. This was not the first strange dream she had but it had been different than the others. Never before had one been a direct continuation of a previous one. And that man...

She knew that man. But who was he? She looked around her room and saw that three out of four watchdogs were sleeping. Only Entreri was awake. He regarded her curiously, not sure if she was all right. She waved him off and lit a cigarette. She looked over to him again when she felt his piercing gaze upon her. "I'm fine," she said quietly. "I just had a weird dream."

"Does it have anything to do with earlier?" he asked carefully. She nodded and he continued. "Do you want to talk about it?" She shook her head. No.