A/N: Sorry it's taking so long, but soon I'll be back on track

A/N: Sorry it's taking so long, but soon I'll be back on track. I figured this would be boring in the Disneyland chapter, so I decided to make it a kind of filler. So on with the (filler) chapter.

Bodily Functions and Not Morning People at 4am

Ulquiorra wasn't a morning person, contrary to popular belief. He looks and acts like a morning person, but isn't one. For example, Ulquiorra doesn't like to get up at seven-o'clock. So how the hell did the demonic child wake me up at five-o'clock, Ulquiorra pondered.

"Oi! Albino the Emo! Be ready in a half-hour, or else…" Thomas threatened the melancholic Espada. Ulquiorra silently cursed the white-haired boy as he left the room.

Ulquiorra got completely undressed and stepped into the bathroom. He washed his hair and body in the shower, using cold water in order to wake himself up. Afterward, he brushed his teeth. How do humans go through such annoying and pointless tasks, Ulqiorra thought. He then wrapped a towel around his waist and walked into the bedroom. Inoue should still be asleep, so I should be quiet, Ulquiorra reasoned in his mind.

"HENTAI!!" Inoue shouted out as she hurled a sharp metal object at Ulquiorra. Ulquiorra narrowly avoided another death by closing the door. A normal person couldn't register what had happened. But, Ulquiorra isn't normal. He had only caught a small glimpse of what she had been doing. Unfortunately, that small glimpse was about all it took for his gigai to react. Fate loathes me, Ulquiorra thought as he attempted to calm himself down.

:With Nnoitora:

"My Father Sense is Tingling!" Nnoitora shouted out. He then ran toward the room of Inoue and Ulquiorra.

"Wait, Nnoitora, you don't have a father sense!" Grimmjow shouted out as he followed after his 'father'.

"Well, I'm done getting ready, better see what's going on." Syzael said while in his female gigai. This ought to be bloody amusing, Syzael thought while smirking.

"This oughtta be good." Michelle said, smirking while following the gigaied Espada.

:Back to Ulquiorra:

It took all about five minutes, thinking about Nnoitora's erotic gay cake to calm himself down. Afterward he knocked on the bathroom door.

"C-c-come i-i-in." Inoue stuttered. She was shivering. I wonder if he did see me naked, Inoue thought. I wonder if she knows I saw her naked, Ulqiorra thought.

As Ulquiorra walked out of the bathroom, he was too absorbed in his thoughts to notice a flaring reiatsu running at him. Suddenly, the door was knocked down and poor Ulquiorra was sent flying with the towel he was wearing as his only sense of clothing getting sent flying off. Right in front of Inoue. Her face turned a deeper red than it was at the airport a day or two ago with the kiss incident. Nnoitora was about to say something when he noticed the now nude Quatra Espada. As Grimmjow and Syzael caught up, they saw what happened. The only thoughts running through their minds were, Damn, he's got that big a package? Nnoitora could only stare. Michelle stopped by to ask if everyone was ready. She caught Ulquiorra nude and stared wishing Ulquiorra were her boyfriend. Inoue could only say that Ulquiorra was well endowed.

Once Ulquiorra regained complete control of himself, he realized what happened. Quickly, he put the towel back on and walked over to the door. He then proceeded to slam the door shut.

Oh. My. God. That had to be at least 10 inches, Inoue thought with a huge blush covering her face. Ulquiorra noticed and asked her, "What?"

"Nothing, Nothing!" Inoue answered. She then went out the door.

"Humans are strange…" Ulquiorra muttered after she left. He then went out the door, and heard Grimmjow and Syzael snickering. "What is it, trash?" Ulquiorra stated since no humans were around.

"Dude, Ulquiorra, that big incident must have been embarrasing." Grimmjow taunted.

"Yes Ulquiorra, a huge blow to your pride." Syzael harassed.

"Shut it, trash." Ulquiorra commanded them. Yeah, I get it, I know, Ulquiorra thought. I got kicked in the face by someone a lower rank than myself. Damn Nnoitora.

A/N: Apparently, Ulquiorra needs to learn about humans. To all Ulqui Lovers, myself included, I'm sorry if this offends you. I just wanted to get an update in before my final exams this week. Leave a review, or I'll send a pissed off Ulquiorra to your home.