Author's Note: Once again, confusion, I'm sure, but as this is only the third chapter, I hope you'll forgive me as I develop the plot :-D Enjoy, and thank you so very much for reading!
2
"Love is not grown in a garden, nor sold in the marketplace; whether you are a king or a servant, the price is your head and nothing less. Yes, the cost of the elixir of love is your head! Do you hesitate? 0 miser, It is cheap at that price!"
- Abu Hamid al-Ghazali
My fingers trailed along the cold stone wall as I descended the spiral staircase that led deep into the bowels of Aberdeen's Gate. It was a familiar corridor, one that I had followed daily since before I could remember. Yet despite its strangely comforting familiarity, the pervasive damp never failed to chill me and the stale rank of mold never failed to nauseate me.
I took shallow breaths through my mouth, though the air itself left behind a foul taste. In a weak and, ultimately, futile attempt to ward off the cold, I imagined the warmth of the summer sun upon my skin and planned to return to the Courtyard following my treatment. The Courtyard was a pleasant little corner of nature, lush and green and fragrant, smelling sweetly of flowers and sunshine, if such a combined scent were possible. It was the closest I had ever come to seeing the world beyond Aberdeen's Gate, and I adored it. In fact, I pitied the people who were prisoners of Aberdeen's Gate in the truest sense of the word, those who were not even allowed to appreciate the beauty of the Courtyard.
Still thinking about the Courtyard, I neared the chamber that was as familiar a companion to me as the dank corridor itself. I noticed that the door was ajar, but I knew better than to enter until I was greeted. Therefore, I raised my hand, intending to pull the lever beside the door, which would indicate my arrival to those inside the chamber. Yet I paused with my hand around the lever when I heard two men clearly arguing.
I realized, of course, that eavesdropping was dangerous business within the prison. If anyone suspected that I might have overheard something of import … well, needless to say, my leash would shorten considerably, and they would likely prohibit my visits to the Courtyard. Despite understanding that very probable consequence, I could not bring myself to pull that lever, thus stopping the heated conversation by announcing my presence.
"Your first patient is due any time now. So, you'd best get over your attack of morals, Doctor." The first man snorted, and I imagined he was shaking his head in frustration. "You don't attend the Academy and still have morals."
I thought about that for a moment. The Academy … I recognized that name. It was the shortened name used to refer to the Wonderland Science Academy. Once, I heard someone mention that the Academy was the only school of any significance beneath the Queen of Hearts' regime.
"If I suspected what my enrollment meant, I would've declined the offer," the second man returned. He sounded surprisingly young. Those who acquired the title of doctor within the prison were generally well past the prime of youth.
"You don't decline an offer to attend the Academy anymore than you decline an assignment here," the first man snapped.
"I would have," the second man returned.
"And it would've been off with your head," the first man said, repeating a phrase for which the Queen of Hearts was infamous. Even from within the confines of Aberdeen's Gate, I knew that.
"Better that than this. You'll bring me rats, only they aren't rats. They're people."
"People mean nothing to the Queen," the first man replied. "You'd best remember that."
As it seemed the argument had ended, I quickly pulled the lever, fearful that one of them might discover me and realize that I had heard the entire conversation. Still, the words the two men exchanged troubled me.
People mean nothing to the Queen …
Wonderland
Rain consumed the land – a never-ending plague that was, in itself, a mysterious riddle without answer.
Lily (1) Heart called it the Sadness.
Perhaps it should have pleased her that, shortly after the rain began, no one seemed to worry over where she went or what she did. No longer was she reprimanded for unbecoming behavior. It was, in fact, the sort of freedom unheard of for a princess, especially a princess as young as she at only just barely ten years old. And, admittedly, at first, Lily rather enjoyed the newfound liberty to do as she pleased without thought or consequence. However, Lily soon realized what such freedom truly meant.
Her mother, the Queen whom some still called "the Duchess," (2) did not even look at her as she wandered the corridors of the palace, dressed in a gown and cloak of white that only seemed to emphasize her skin's ghostly pallor. And her eyes … the clear blue darkened with each day that passed until there was nothing left but pools of obsidian, seemingly endless, sightless, and lifeless – the very embodiment of Sadness. As for her father … well, at first, it seemed that he fought the Sadness. He was, after all, the King of Hearts and the King of Wonderland. And he was her father. As such, Lily reasoned, he was the strongest of any man in the whole of Wonderland. Yet on the day that the rain turned to snow, Lily realized she had lost her father as well.
Lily awoke that morning, shivering beneath the blankets that had never failed to warm her. Immediately, she sat up in her bed and surveyed her room. Nothing appeared out of place, but she could not deny the cold.
The pale light of the overcast sky filtered in through the windows, and, temporarily mesmerized, Lily watched the snow, a strange substance foreign to any place but the highest of mountains in Wonderland. It could have been beautiful, but the very sight of the seemingly harmless white flakes that coated the earth in a crystalline blanket of white terrified Lily.
It was the Sadness, she knew.
Flinging aside her blankets, Lily jumped out of bed and rushed to change, hating that her wardrobe consisted of dresses alone – the only wardrobe befitting a Princess of Hearts … a Princess of Wonderland. She rummaged around for a coat at least, but all she found was the thin black duster her mother insisted she use for horse riding. As if black did not show dust! Of course, she wasn't permitted more than a sedate trot on her horse, which, admittedly, didn't create near as much dust as a full gallop. Still, Lily rolled her eyes at her mother's color choice before she recalled that she would give anything to be subject once more to her mother's over protectiveness and lectures on appropriate fashion.
Then, Lily paused after she slipped one arm inside the duster. Black. In her haste to dress and singular concern to find her father, Lily did not consider one very obvious fact: the last time she wore the duster it had been the rich color of scarlet.
Lily frowned, running her fingertips along the black material. It seemed real enough, and there was still a tear at the elbow of the one sleeve. Then, scanning her rather large wardrobe, Lily realized with a start that all the color had vanished – only black and white remained. Turning, Lily glanced around the rest of the enormous bedchamber. Every last little bit of color was gone, leaving white accented by black and black accented by white.
Quickly, Lily pulled on the other sleeve of the duster and fastened the longer coat before yanking on the boots she used for riding. The boots, by far, were the only practical shoes she owned.
Rushing out of her bedroom and into the corridor, Lily skidded to a halt before the one woman she did not want to see.
Her name was Red. She was a doctor held in the highest of esteems though Lily often thought the icy woman was more a witch than a physician. When Lily's mother fell mysteriously and near fatally ill two years earlier, Red earned the respect and the regard of the kingdom by saving the queen's life. Naturally, for that, Lily was grateful. Yet, with a child's logic, she was suspicious all the same, trusting that there was something dark about this woman that no one else could see.
As always, despite her name, Red wore black. Her skin was the palest of porcelain and her eyes a shocking, vivid blue. She kept the heavy length of her dark hair tied back. Lily imagined she might have been beautiful if there were any hint of warmth or kindness, but there was not. Red was as bitterly cold as a pool of frozen water. Yet by virtue of saving the queen's life, the whole of the palace, Lily's mother and father included, overlooked Red's frigid demeanor.
"I'm going to see my daddy," Lily announced as she felt the need to say something when that awful woman continued to simply look at her as if she were of no more significance than a beetle.
Without warning, Red grasped Lily's chin with her fingers, forcing her to look upward. Red's nails bit her flesh and Lily winced. "Your eyes are blue."
Of course her eyes were blue. They'd always been blue. Was the woman mad? Lily wrenched her head away from Red and stumbled back.
"You are a child," Red murmured. "That must be why." She paused, studying Lily for a moment longer. "It will take you eventually. I envy your innocence, but it can, I imagine, only save you for so long."
Lily swallowed, watching Red warily as a genuine prickle of fear raised the tiny hairs on the nape of her neck. "I'm going to see my daddy," she whispered.
Red shrugged. "Go," she said. "See him then. But he will not see you."
Lily raced through the palace corridors, her heart pounding wildly. She ran to the library; her father liked the library, and, somehow, Lily suspected she would find him there. Lily knew that, at one time, books and the infinite wisdom they contained had been outlawed by the Queen of Hearts. That alone was only one of many reasons why Lily was thankful she had never known her grandmother. Lily adored books, and her father often read to her … at least, before the rain. Yet even after the start of the never-ending rain, her father still wandered the library, though he only listlessly perused the books, continuously searching, it seemed, for one that would once again spark his interest.
When Lily entered the library through the massive double doors that were, as always, thrown wide opened, she saw him immediately. He stood with his back turned toward her, while facing one of the many bookshelves with his hands clasped behind his back. Strangely, his suit was pure white.
She opened her mouth, but before Lily could utter even the barest of gasps, a hand clamped firmly over her mouth and a man's arm circled about her waist. She kicked and struggled as she tried to scream, but her efforts were useless. Against her will, the man hauled Lily back down the corridor and into a small, dimly lit chamber. The man kicked the door closed behind them, and Lily managed to bite his hand.
The man cursed, releasing her. Lily spun around to confront her attacker and stopped short. "Gryphon? (3)" she asked.
"Damn it to hell, girl," Gryphon snapped. "You broke skin, you know."
Gryphon was Red's assistant, but, unlike Red, he was not cold. However, as only a child could possibly judge, Lily saw something dark inside of Gryphon as well. He simply hid it, and, despite her better sense, Lily liked Gryphon.
"You deserve it," Lily returned. Though, admittedly, she was sorry she'd hurt him. But, well, she hadn't known it was him, after all! "Why'd you grab me?" she demanded.
"Because you don't want to see your da," Gryphon answered. "Jack Heart's not home and it's not something his little girl needs to see."
Lily folded her arms across her chest and raised her chin, trying to assume her most royally condescending pose. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means," Gryphon began as he tapped his temple with one finger, "that he isn't home, up here."
"The Sadness," Lily breathed as horror and panic gripped her chest painfully and tears blurred her vision. She blinked them away. Crying didn't solve problems, and it wouldn't fix her father.
"You call it whatever you want, but he couldn't fight it forever."
Lily studied Gryphon silently for a moment. "Why are you 'home'?" she asked.
"It can't hurt someone who's already dead inside," Gryphon replied. "I've seen too much. This here … Well, this is nothing."
Lily frowned, thinking. "Then why am I 'home'? Red said something about …" Lily's voice trailed off as she tried to think of the word Red had used. "Innocence," she finally recalled.
"Seems about right," Gryphon said. "Innocence and death," he mused, almost to himself, "the two things that can save you … for a little while at least, but maybe not forever, I imagine."
Of course, Lily had no clue what Gryphon was on about, and she doubted he even knew. A lot of the time, Gryphon talked without the purpose of making sense. At least, that's how Lily saw it.
"Here now," Gryphon said. "I didn't bring you here to talk. Well, I did, but I brought you here for something else." He paused. Then, with a sigh, he said, "I love her, you know. That was my biggest mistake." He shook his head. "Love has a way of stealing common sense, and I can't fix it, not now. It's too late." Then, he knelt before Lily and grasped her shoulders, meeting her gaze. "But maybe you can fix it. Call it what you will, but it hasn't hurt you yet."
Lily stared at him. "I'm just a girl," she whispered, suddenly feeling so very lost and so very alone. What could she possibly do?
"Alice was only a child too – the one of Legend, anyway," Gryphon said.
"I'm not Alice," Lily replied.
Gryphon pressed his lips together, clearly frustrated. "If you don't try then she's won. It's over. She has everything she wants. It isn't about ruling the kingdom. She's only ever wanted them to know her pain – her sorrow. She lost her love. But, more than that, she lost her son, and she wants them to know that sadness."
"Why don't you just stop her?" Why ask a child to do what he should easily be able to do himself?
"I can't."
And Lily knew. Despite her youth, she knew. He loved her; he truly loved her. It was appalling, and it was, for him, a disease for which there was no cure. He could not hurt her, and he could not deny Red her greatest wish.
"I thought I liked you," Lily said.
"I know," Gryphon replied. "Maybe you will again someday." Then, Gryphon handed her a small vial. Quizzically, Lily studied the clear liquid inside. "One drop for a dream," Gryphon explained. "Use the dreams wisely. It was one of his most dangerous inventions – one of many reasons why he started the fire."
"Why do I need dreams?"
"Because if you read the cards right, every dream is a prophecy. Most people just don't know it. Drink the dreams, read the cards, and maybe you'll find the answers." Gryphon paused. "It's all I know."
After that, Gryphon departed, leaving Lily alone, more alone, in fact, than she'd ever been.
Everyone was gone, and all she had was a bottle of dreams.
Lily's fingers tightened around the bottle. She drew in a deep breath and, bracing herself, she pulled out the stopper, which was attached to a dropper.
One drop, she reminded herself.
She replaced the stopper and tucked the bottle into the pocket of her duster. Then, she waited. When, after a few minutes, nothing miraculous occurred, she realized Gryphon really was mad in every sense of the word. Obviously, he'd given her a vial that held nothing more than water.
Irritated, Lily took one step toward the door before she collapsed.
Elsewhere in Wonderland, the Man pulled a tattered blanket over his shoulders. The cold chilled his very bones, but, rather than retreat, he held his ground, waiting for the dreadful news he was certain he would soon hear.
Shivering, he surveyed the vast field that sprawled before him, seeming to stretch to the very ends of the world. White snow and, curiously, black snow covered the field, which consisted of black and white squares that represented the board in a game of chess. Therefore, despite the snow, the chessboard remained precise and intact – the chessboard which was more a maze of wits than a game of intellect, and it was the only path to him and the only path away from him. The path was a riddle that only a select few others, besides him, could solve. One of the few who could answer the riddle was completely unaware of his ability.
The Man suspected that blissful ignorance was about to change.
After what seemed an interminable amount of time, the Man finally saw Haigha (4), one of the few capable of solving the riddle who knew, in fact, that he was capable of solving the riddle. Haigha was the unfortunate result of an experiment gone horribly awry. He was neither human nor animal, but a grotesque mix between man and bull … similar to what Oysters might have called "the Minotaur." Haigha's body was that of a man's, but his head was that of a horned, ferocious bull, resulting in Haigha's inability to live amongst the world beyond the sanctuary of the chessboard. To accommodate his occasional forays beyond the maze, Haigha wore a large cloak and hood made of heavy material in order to blend amongst the people of Wonderland as best he could.
"The world is frozen," Haigha announced without preamble in a voice that was both unnaturally deep and gravely.
The Man nodded, having already suspected as much. "She escaped the Great Vault then," the Man said, pride warring with horror at what she now planned. "And she has taken her revenge at last. I always feared this would happen."
"They will all know our suffering. They will know the grief of losing a child. I swear it."
The Man cringed as Red's words, spoken so long ago it seemed, echoed like a curse through his mind. He would cross the chessboard if he could, but he feared abandoning his sanctuary. Here, his knowledge was safe, seemingly buried at the end of the world and beyond the chessboard labyrinth that few could ever even hope to survive. More than once, he considered suicide as the final end to his knowledge. However, such a cowardly recourse would do little to save Wonderland now.
"She was a far better student than I ever imagined possible," the Man murmured. "I told her once without shame that I was a genius. She's clearly proven the strength of her own intellect, though she borrowed my knowledge to prove that point."
"You've certainly the arrogance of a genius," Haigha muttered.
"Yes," the Man replied, "among countless other faults, I'm sure." He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he thought. After a moment, he asked, "What did Gretna say when you last spoke to her?"
"You're memory must be faulty," Haigha pointed out. "I've told you a hundred times, at least."
"Well, tell me one more time."
"She said the vile brat was dead, drowned in the river. And she was glad for it – glad to be rid of the whole sordid mess. She only ever did what she did for her husband and his promise to you."
The Man's jaw clenched. "I don't believe it," he said. "I've never believed it." Though, of course, the Man should have believed it. Haigha was an excellent tracker, and it seemed he had searched the whole of Wonderland without success.
"There's always been an easy answer," Haigha said.
Yes, the Man thought, there has been. Though it was an option the Man was hesitant to try. After all, did the Child really need to know? The Man had always envisioned a reunion, even if he never could rejoin the world and even if the Man only ever saw the Child once. The Man had done it out of arrogance and selfishness … and a need for there to be a path to the truth. Not only did the Man believe in the truth – in knowledge – but he believed that everyone had a right to know who they were.
The Child did not know who he was because he had been raised with lies. That is, if the Child was still alive.
"I created the chip and placed it there myself, meant to be activated by remote device. An infant's brain, after all, could not have processed such images. The chip responded by complete assimilation into the brain – virtually undetectable, you know. Ingenious really," the Man added.
"You could go to her," Haigha suggested after a long stretch of silence.
"No," the Man whispered as he shook his head. "Her greatest grief was losing her son. It is because of him that she will kill Wonderland."
Author's Notes:
(1) – Lily: the name given for the White Queen's daughter.
(2) – The Duchess: The miniseries took the liberty of making the hideous Duchess of Carroll's books into a beauty; I've taken the liberty of also making her the "White Queen."
(3) – Gryphon: The Gryphon is a character in Alice's Adventures in Wonderland; he has, of course, been completely re-imagined in this story and bears no resemblance to his original character.
(4) – Haigha: This is the name given to the March Hare in Through the Looking Glass, though Alice does not recognize him as the March Hare. However, Haigha in this story is obviously not meant to be either the March Hare or Mad March. And yes, the reference to the Minotaur is a deliberate reference to the Greek myth, and the reason for that will hopefully become clear later in the story.
I hope this covers everything. I apologize for the lack of Alice and Hatter in this chapter, but it was a necessary evil.
Again, I want to offer a huge THANK YOU to everyone who has reviewed. Each one means so very much to me, and I cannot express enough how very much I appreciate it :-D