Ok you guys, I couldn't wait a whole freaking week. Geeze, I'm so excited!

So, this is part one of an epic chapter that I decided to split into two pieces just after I finished it because otherwise it would have been roughly 6,598 words you'd be reading, not including the author note. And I know what most of you would probably say. You'd say "We don't care! We'll read the whole thing! You just want to be cruel and make us wait!" and you'd be right. :D Lol, but you know me. I'm terrible at this waiting game myself. You'll probably get the next chapter before the week is out, depending on how busy I am. (I will be plenty busy tomorrow evening however so don't expect it until WAY late that night at least.)

About this chapter, its great. Its wonderful. It makes me happy. I love it. Which is in TOTAL contrast to the chapter that directly follows it because I hate that chapter. I shake my fist at myself for writing that chapter.

So, there is going to be a drug mentioned in this chapter known as MDMA. The more common street name for it these days is Ecstasy. Oooh… Shiny. I mean, err… BAD! Drugs are BAD.

However, I should let you know now that if you are ever planning on trying ecstasy, MAKE SURE it is ECSTASY that you are getting! A lot of times people will try to pass off other more dangerous drugs as X in an effort to make a cheaper form of the tablet with the same type of high. I saw first hand the negative effects of this happen to a friend of mine in high school and it was pretty scary. She lived, but it was still scary. So please, (and I'm not encouraging you to try drugs. Bad drugs are bad. Remember?) IF YOU ARE GOING TO DO ECSTASY, now or any time in the future, please read up on it before you do. There are several websites which can give you the information you need to check your tablets and make sure you're getting X instead of Meth or anything else they're putting with it these days. *pretends to be out of the loop* The internet is your friend in many ways and that includes learning about SAFE recreational drug use, which you shouldn't do, because drugs are fun. I mean BAD. I meant bad. Drugs are bad.

LAWL.

Also, the thing Saïx does at the beginning of this chapter actually DOES work. Back in high school my husband and his friends did it to their Spanish teacher. But telling you this I kinda just want to do a whole MythBusters thing and say, now that its already been done, YOU don't have to do it and get yourself into trouble. So please, don't do it. Cause its really not funny. Unless your teacher is a real prick, then its hilarious.

Geeze, I'm just one bad influence after another.

Oh! And one more thing. SMUT! Smut in this chapter. Stop at "Please come back to me." and then don't pick back up if you don't want to read. (Although you'll be missing a lot of really interesting dialogue if you do skip.)

That's all for now. Enjoy!

It was the Saturday before Halloween. The night of the party. Six days before he was supposed to fly to New York with Axel to see the Misfits play their annual Halloween show. But Roxas was unsure that he could win Axel back in time. That meant he'd likely be sacrificing that ticket to the blond jerk standing only five feet away with his arm wrapped tightly around Axel's waist. Roxas turned away from the scene to talk to Marluxia who was already a third of the way through his first bottle of vodka, and they had barely just arrived. "This Night of the Living Dead idea was a pretty good one. We all make some pretty good looking zombies."

Marluxia laughed loudly. "Fuck yeah we do! We're terrifying! Man, I never spent so much money on fake blood in my life!" Marluxia took another gulp of his vodka and pulled Roxas closer so that nobody could hear him. "So, how are things going with the whole plan?"

Roxas groaned and brought the bottle of beer in his hand to his lips. "Not well. I can't even get near Axel with that bastard clinging to him like a prize trophy."

"Just wait." Saïx smirked as he approached Roxas and Marluxia's conversation. "I put some eye drops in Luxord's beer when he wasn't looking."

Roxas looked between Saïx and Marluxia in confusion as they both snickered and Marluxia gave him a high five. "What do eye drops in his beer have to do with anything?"

"Wait, who dropped the bomb?" Demyx asked curiously as he stepped toward the small group forming. "Was it you Mar? Who'd you do it to?"

Roxas sighed exasperated. "What are you guys talking about? Will someone explain it to me?"

Saïx smiled wickedly and waved a tiny bottle of eye drops in Roxas' face. "We call it dropping the bomb. Its an old prank we used to pull on teachers in high school. You squeeze some eye drops into someone's drink and it makes them sick."

Marluxia nodded. "Like, bathroom sick."

"Like, unable to get off of the toilet sick." Saïx tucked the bottle away and grinned an evil grin feeling very pleased with himself. "All it takes is a few drops but I used a little under half a bottle. Needless to say he'll be in the toilet a good portion of the night."

"That wasn't very smart." Roxas chuckled. "That's your's and Dem's ride home."

"Yeah, but look." Saïx pointed to Luxord who was now grabbing his stomach and asking around for the bathroom location. "Hah! He'll be in the port-a-potty all night! Now is your chance."

Roxas looked to Axel who stood alone quietly. He took a deep breath as Demyx and Marluxia pushed him forward and adjusted his costume, which was foolish because he was supposed to look bad, he was a zombie. But why not try to be a sexy one? As soon as he was within earshot of Axel he cleared his throat. "Hey."

Axel turned to face Roxas, honestly surprised that the blond was talking to him. "H-hey."

"You look bored." Roxas said in a small voice. "And alone."

"Well Lux just had to go to the toilet real quick." Axel replied. He shuffled his feet and stared at the ground, not totally sure what he could say. "He'll be back soon."

"Oh." Roxas nodded and snickered lightly knowing that wouldn't exactly be the case. "Well I can keep you company till he gets back." He glanced over his shoulder at the four portable toilets about twenty yards away and the long line to use them. "Looks like it'll be a while. Why don't we walk around?"

Axel bit his lip nervously and looked from the line for the toilets to Roxas and back again. "I should stay put. Luxord might get worried if he looks over and can't find me."

"Yeah." Roxas smiled widely and leaned closer to Axel. "But then again, how's he gonna feel when he sees me talking to you? Which is worse?"

"I guess you're right." Axel shrugged and started his feet into motion. "You wanna check out the house of the guy throwing this party? It's a quarter mile up the road and there's tons of people there too."

"Sounds like fun." Roxas squealed inwardly. This was all happening too easily. He glanced over his shoulder to see Demyx and Marluxia giving him an enthusiastic thumbs up as they passed the group and he returned it discreetly before turning his attention back to Axel. "So, this guy owns all this property out here?"

"Nah. Just this acre and a half here and then the house up the road. I guess he tried buying land closer to his house for the parties but that was the closest he could get." Axel stuck his hands in his pockets and looked Roxas over quickly. "You look good."

Roxas blushed lightly but as he remembered just what he was wearing he was a little less flattered. "Yeah, good and scary."

"Every year Marluxia tries to get us to go in matching costumes. This is the first year anybody agreed to go along with it. Probably because zombies are easy. Last year he wanted us all to go as characters from A Clockwork Orange but nobody wanted to put forth the effort." Axel laughed lightly. "Of course he had to be Alex. And he went too, but nobody went with him. He was so pissed."

Roxas snickered and stared up at the sky as they walked along the road. "Sounds like him. What a diva."

Axel smiled but slowly his smile faded. He glanced at Roxas and cocked his head to the side. "How are you doin' Rox?"

Roxas shrugged. "Oh, you know. Working to pay for the apartment. Saïx too. Crazy how that happened, us living together…"

Axel sighed and shook his head. "I didn't ask what you've been doing. I asked how you've been doing."

Roxas glanced at Axel curiously. "Why do you care?"

"Stop avoiding the question." Axel stopped walking and turned to face Roxas entirely. "You know why. I still love you Rox. I want to see you happy."

"If you want to see me happy then you'll come back to me." Roxas stared hard at Axel. "I love you Axel. I want you back home. Our home in our bed, laying there in my arms. I shouldn't have freaked out like I did but I didn't know how to handle it. I can't change that but I can change this!" Roxas reached out and pulled Axel to him. "Come back to me." He pressed his lips to the taller man's and kissed him deeply. He smiled as he felt Axel completely cave but his joy was short lived. The redhead began pushing him away. Roxas broke the kiss and looked to him sadly. "Don't push me away Axel."

"Roxas, I can't do this!" Axel grabbed his head in his hands and shook it. "I'm not going to keep going back and forth between you two. I'm weak, and I love you both. If I go back to you Luxord will only try to get me back. If I go back to him you'll try to get me back. It'll be an endless fucking cycle and everybody will just keep getting hurt!" He took a deep breath and stared at Roxas seriously. "I need to just stay where I am. It's better this way."

Roxas clenched his fists and threw them down at his sides. "Damn it Axel! You don't know how much this is killing me! I gave up everything for you! My religion, college and my parents, all of it for you."

"You did that for yourself! Don't delude yourself Roxas. You're better than that." Axel turned away from the blond and started back the way they came. "This was a mistake. I'm going back to wait for Luxord so that we can leave."

"You'll be waiting a while." Roxas crossed his arms and smiled. "Saïx dropped the bomb so that you and I would have time to talk."

Axel froze and turned to face Roxas with a twitching eyebrow. "Saïx dropped the bomb? On Luxord? Did you ask him to do it?"

Roxas chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, I didn't even know what it was until after he did it. He used nearly half a bottle."

"Half!? Are you serious!?" Axel tried to suppress the laughter rising in his throat but it came out all the same. "That wasn't very smart. How is he supposed to get home? He and Dem rode with Lux and me up here."

"Guess we'll just have to stay longer than we expected." Roxas smiled and started back toward their previous destination. "Come on, you gonna show me that house or what?"

"Alright. I guess I have some time to kill." Axel rejoined his former lover in the trudge up the small hill and dirt road. Finally they reached the house with red garden lights illuminating the outside décor. All around were incredibly convincing dead bodies and other sorts or gory horror themed decorations. "So this guy supposedly is an ex movie executive and every time the studio he used to work with is done with props they give him what he wants. Pretty cool, huh?"

"Yeah." Roxas smiled as they walked up to the house, poppy music thrumming from within but nothing that he recognized. They stepped through the massive double doors where the light of a disco ball was the main source of illumination, save for the few black lights giving the room a purplish glow. There was smoke in the room, unfamiliar to Roxas by scent, because it didn't choke him like cigarette smoke but it wasn't as thick as fog machine smoke and didn't have a synthetic smell. It smelled horrible. "Uhg, what's that smell?"

Axel snickered. "Ah, that would be good ol' Cannabis. You know, marijuana."

Roxas shrugged and at Axel's grin he rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah, I know. I still have a lot to learn, so shoot me."

"It's a drug. Makes you feel good. But if you have to smoke it then I say don't do it. Not worth it. You get that taste in your mouth and it stays there for a while. And man, do you get hungry. Better to drink it in a tea or something." Axel lead Roxas through the sea of unfamiliar faces toward the stairs. "There is one thing I've been wanting to try every year we come here but I'm always driving so I'm always afraid to take it."

Roxas looked to Axel curiously as he followed the man up the stairs. "What is it?"

"Its called MDMA. That's the short name. I can't even begin to pretend I know how to pronounce it. But chances are, Zex is already in there having a trip with a bunch of strangers like he does every year. He can probably tell you the name." Axel stepped into the room adorned with pink beads. "Geeze, the guy who owns this house is such a fuckin' hippy but he has the best parties."

Roxas followed Axel into the room and spotted Zexion right away. He was shocked to see some girl draped over the short man kissing herself silly on his neck. "Whoa."

"Yeah, whoa is right." Axel chuckled and approached his friend. "Hey Zex, you look like you're enjoying yourself."

"Axel, Roxas! Hi!" Zexion smiled brightly and stood, knocking the brunette off of him as he did so. "I'm so glad to see you. Did you come to try a tablet?"

Axel nodded and laughed softly as Zexion hugged him. "Yeah, I've been waiting to try it for a while. Now that I don't have to drive, it's the perfect chance."

"Yeah, you definitely don't want to be driving. Here." Zexion reached into his pocket and fished out a small tablet. He placed it in Axel's palm and clasped his hands tightly. "You and Roxas share this. It'll be good for you two. Very spiritual and bonding. Just put it on your tongues and let it dissolve together. It's a beautiful thing."

"Ha ha, ok Zex. Thanks." Axel took the pill and started out of the room. "Lets go to the bathroom Rox. Zex is too hippy-happy for me right now."

"Uh, ok." Roxas hurried after Axel and into the bathroom down the hall. He looked to the redhead calmly before examining the pill. "So, that little thing made Zexion that complacent? Maybe we should stock up and start feeding them to Larxene."

"Ha, good idea." Axel grinned before holding the pill out between the two of them. "Zex said to put it on our tongues and let it dissolve between us. You ready?"

Roxas cocked an eyebrow but smiled. "You sure you want to? I mean, being that close to me and all might upset Luxord."

"It's just harmless fun Rox." Axel nodded quickly, trying to reassure himself. "No emotions involved."

"Alright." Roxas stepped forward and opened his mouth letting his tongue hang out. He watched as Axel placed the tablet on his tongue and then stepped forward, bringing the two wet muscles together. The taste was instantly bitter and it took all Roxas had to keep his tongue pressed against the redhead's. But after a while he grew accustomed to the taste and soon the pill was gone. He stared into Axel's green eyes calmly waiting to feel anything, but nothing came. "I don't feel any different."

"You will, all drugs take time." Axel moved to the sink and turned on the water. "You should drink a bit of water so you don't get dehydrated. That happened the first time Zexion took it. We thought he'd die." Axel took a few handfuls of water and gulped them down quickly. He watched the blond follow suit and then smiled with satisfaction. "You wanna go find somewhere to chill? I mean, besides the bathroom."

"Yeah." Roxas started out the door and wandered down the hall. He was surprised to find another set of stairs leading further up. "This doesn't look like a three story house."

"It's probably the attic. Come on!" Axel grabbed Roxas by his wrist and pulled him up. "Anything to get us away from this bullshit music." He lead the blond up the stairs and opened the door at the top, flicking on a light switch as he entered. Sure enough, it was an attic space, but it was surprisingly well furnished. There was a couch and a table and it was obvious the owner of the house liked to spend a lot of time there. "Check it out Rox! Pretty bad ass, huh?"

"Yeah." Roxas started over to the couch and sat down. He was beginning to feel a wave of euphoria sweep over him and he beckoned for Axel to join him. "Come sit down, this couch is so soft."

"Alright." Axel joined Roxas and stared up at the ceiling. "I'm starting to feel pretty lucid. How about you?"

"Yeah." Roxas nodded and looked over at Axel. "I feel pretty mellow right now. But, I want to do something too. I wish we were at a show so I could mosh in the pit. Or something."

"Yeah, I kinda got the urge to do something too." Axel glanced over to Roxas let his hand snake across the couch and rest on the boy's leg. "I love you Roxas. I've missed you. Do you miss me?"

"Every day." Roxas licked his lips and scooted closer to Axel. "I still wake up and expect to see you there. And sometimes I just dream about waking up and you're there in bed next to me. And then I kiss you and you're happy. I made you happy, right Axel?"

"Yes. You always made me happy Roxas. I never meant to make you feel like you didn't." Axel scooped Roxas' hand in his own and leaned closer to the boy. "Sometimes I wake up and expect to see you there too. And sometimes, when I see that it isn't you… I roll back over and go back to sleep hoping that the next time I wake up it will be you. But it never is."

"Axel, I love you." Roxas straddled Axel and pressed his lips to the man's cheek. "Please come back to me."

"Let's have sex Roxas. I want you, inside me, here and now." Axel began tugging desperately at Roxas' clothes. He was amazed at what speed he was able to undress the boy. He gasped loudly as he felt Roxas kiss a trail up his torso. Every caress of those soft lips against his skin felt like a strange new sensation. He let Roxas undress him, relishing in the feeling every time the boy graced Axel's flesh with his own. Every touch felt heightened and pleasurable and Axel felt himself growing impatient. "Hurry Rox. Forget lubing up, let's just go. I need you right now."

Roxas pressed his length against Axel's opening and eased his way in. Axel didn't need to tell him twice to have sex. It was all Roxas had been thinking about since he kissed the redhead on the path to the house. Now Axel was under the influence of a drug and Roxas knew it was wrong to take advantage but the part of him that might have cared was on the same drug. He let his hands fall into Axel's hair and he tugged the locks gently as he thrust inside that wonderful, warm haven. Every sensation he felt was unlike anything he'd ever experienced. A simple brush of Axel's shoulder against his brought tingles splintering through his body. His breath was shallow and almost shuttering as his length probed deeply inside the older man. His mouth found its way to one of Axel's nipples and he toyed with it slowly, taking joy in the cry of pleasure the redhead let out. "Tell me what I mean to you Axel."

"You're everything to me Rox." Axel grabbed Roxas' face and pulled the blond into a passionate kiss. "You're my world, my sun and moon and the stars and the sky. You're perfect and beautiful. I love you so much. I love you, I want to be yours."

"Then be mine." Roxas let his hands fall from Axel's hair to his hips and he gripped the man gently. He continued to plunge, slow and deep inside Axel, enticing every moan and whimper he could. If at all possible, having sex with Axel now felt better than it ever had. Maybe it was the drug, or maybe it was the beauty in having the redhead in his arms once more. Whatever it was, it felt completely spiritual. Axel was vocalizing louder and more sincerely than he ever had and it drove Roxas insane. Yet he didn't feel on the edge of losing himself. He felt he could go for hours in fact. Slowly he brought his hands to trace over Axel's body which he knew would feel intense thanks to the MDMA coursing through their bodies.

Axel's breath caught in his throat at the feeling of the blond's soft hands trailing up and down his body. He felt hot and cold all at once. "Wh-what are you doing?"

"Rememorizing you. I've nearly forgot how you feel…" Roxas darted his tongue out to lick at Axel's collarbone. "How you taste. Every inch of you is different and special. I want it all back."

"It's your's." Axel managed to say before a loud, long moan nestled in his throat and prevented him from speaking. Sex with Roxas was much different from sex with Luxord, but not tonight. Roxas was usually still on the timid side and although he'd grown more passionate he still liked for Axel to take the lead. Luxord on the other hand had always been the one in control. It was what Axel was used to. He loved the feeling of being helpless in the presence of his lover, subject to their every whim and just ready for them to destroy him with a sensory overload. Normally that was what he did for Roxas, but not now. Now Roxas had him quivering and feeling so out of his wits, it almost hurt. It was Autumn time and the air was cold but somehow, between the MDMA and the blond fucking him senseless, Axel felt on fire. Sweat began trickling down his forehead causing his cake makeup to begin to melt off.

Roxas let his hands dive back into Axel's hair where he could control the redhead's mouth more easily. He pressed his lips against Axel's and kissed him forcefully. He heard the man whimper into his mouth and he couldn't help but smile. "Admit it Axel, I'm a better lover than Luxord. I can be submissive but I can give you a good thrashing when you need it. Remember Marly's car? That night is imprinted in your fucking memory. And that first night we had sex, it was perfect, you can't deny it. I wanna hear you say it Axel."

"Y-you are better. You're right." Axel gasped and wrapped his arms around Roxas, groping his shoulder and grasping at his hair. "Fuck me harder Roxas. Make me yours again."

"I'll fuck you till you forget that son of a bitch and you know who you belong to." Roxas quickened his pace, thrusting as deep inside Axel as he could. His grip on the older man's hair tightened and he pulled back Axel's head to kiss hungrily at his throat. He then moved his mouth to nibble at Axel's ear. "Tonight, you come back home to me, understand?"

"Mmph! Y-yes Roxas. I will." Axel whimpered as he felt Roxas deep inside him, brutally ramming that pleasure spot with full force. He knew he couldn't hold out much longer. Every second brought him closer to orgasm and finally he just relented. He clung tightly to the boy above him and cried out loudly. "Roxas! I'm gonna cum!"

"Good! You cum hard and you fucking remember who did that to you." Roxas continued his thrusts, letting his own climax build. He felt Axel's core begin to pulse and he felt the hot wash of Axel's seed on his stomach, the redhead's beautiful cry bringing Roxas nearly over the edge. He kissed Axel's lips and rode out his own climax, finally feeling that release he'd been missing. He lay atop the trembling man, both gasping for a breath of fresh air in the stale attic atmosphere. He knew he should probably get redressed but he couldn't bring himself to pull away from Axel. Instead he lay there and rested his head on Axel's chest, letting his high from both the drug and the sex take his mind miles away. And then sleep took him.