This chapter is pretty short, but it's something. I apologise for the complete lack of updates on this, but life really did take over. I'm going to update as often as I can, but I don't know how often that'll be. On Sunday, I'm going to work on the next update, but I'm not entirely sure what time I'll be home anyway.

Still, review please. I'd appreciate it. And I'll try and update sooner if I get a few reviews.

Again, really sorry for the time it's taken for this to be up here.

There was this one spot that Derek had found, it wasn't crowded and full of people like so many of the other places were where they could watch the ferry boats, it was quiet, it was the two of them sitting on a bench together with a couple of boxes of Chinese on their laps. To anyone who walked past they would probably get a weird look, but honestly, Derek didn't mind a single bit. Addison was sitting close beside him, his jacket hanging over her tiny frame as she looked out towards Elliot Bay. They hadn't spoken much since leaving work, other than deciding where to get food from and where to go to sit, there was still so much that they needed to discuss and it would happen, just not straight away.

"How's the food for you?" Derek asked quietly as he looked at Addison who was picking at a spring roll, clearly lost in her own thoughts.

When she heard his voice, Addison suddenly looked up at him then down at the spring roll she was picking at before back up to him. "It's good," she replied, nodding her head slightly.

A sigh escaped his lips as he took the spring roll she had and put it in one of the boxes, before closing them and placing them back in the carrier bag they'd been in. As he looked back at Addison, he could tell that a part of her wanted to protest because of him taking the food from her, but another part just couldn't be bothered with it. "I honestly think you could be eating paper and you wouldn't care right now."

It was true, she didn't care what they were eating at all and she put her hand in his pocket and pulled out a clean pack of Kleenex, taking one out and handing it to him before taking one out for herself and putting them back in his jacket pocket. "You're not going to avoid talking again, are you?" The red-head questioned, her tone full of worry.

"I said we'd get food, watch the ferry boats and talk. The first two, we've done, the third is going to happen, don't worry." Derek took the Kleenex from her and put it along with his own in the carrier bag before turning back to face Addison, his hand instantly reaching for hers. "I love you."

"So you keep saying."

"Because I do, more than anything."

"You've been avoiding me since Nancy left. When she was here, I saw the man I fell in love with. He was there, he was taking care of me because I was sick, refusing to let go of my hand when we were out, holding me close at night even when I tried to push him away. He was there, Derek." Addison paused, and was about to continue when she was interrupted by Derek.

"But now he's gone. Now it's the man who made you do what you done." It hurt him to say it, but he knew it was true, they both did.

"Yeah. Where's my Derek gone? I know he's still there, because if he wasn't, he wouldn't be sitting here now with me." Addison looked up at him, gripping his hand even tighter than before as she continued. "I'm sorry, Derek, I am. I know sorry doesn't cut any of it and I shouldn't have slept with him, or stayed with him or anything. I know I should have told you sooner about the baby and everything, but I was scared you'd leave again, I still am." A single tear fell down her cheek, she didn't want to cry in front of him again, but it appeared that it was going to happen.

"Don't cry," he said simply as he reached up to brush the falling tear from her cheek. "It was just a lot to take in, one minute we're saying that everything is fine and we're all right with the whole thing, then you suddenly come out with this about staying with him, aborting his baby. It hurt Addison, the whole thing hurt. I know I was distant and I'm sorry for that, it's my fault you slept with him in the first place. But I never thought, for one minute, that you might actually stay with him after I left."

"You left though! You left me alone in New York, he was there. He was there when you weren't." Addison pulled her hand away from his, pushing both of her hands into his jacket pocket. "He was always there when you weren't, even before you suddenly took off to the other side of the country. My birthday, he took me out for a meal. Our anniversary, he showed up and we stayed in watching a movie and got take-out. Our anniversary, Derek! You were meant to be there, but instead he showed up and said you got pulled into surgery and you couldn't get out of it. I didn't want Mark there, I wanted you, but I didn't want to be alone either." The whole time she spoke, she avoided looking at him, sitting outside where people could see and hear them probably wasn't the best of ideas, but they were talking, not yelling. At least, Addison hoped it stayed that way.

"I shouldn't have left New York, not without either talking to you first, or you coming with me. I should have been there every single night when I could, especially your birthday and our anniversary," Derek reached across and placed his hand on her thigh, hoping she wouldn't pull away from him. "I got scared."

He got scared? What of? Addison looked up at him, curiosity in her eyes and she instantly saw the worry in his and she was almost certain she knew. "You got scared." Addison prompted him, wanting him to go on.

"I knew I was distant, that we weren't talking. At least, I wasn't talking to you. I'd be at work late on the nights I didn't have to be and I'd be thinking about you, worried that I would go home and you wouldn't be there. That I'd walk in and all your stuff would be gone. It didn't help that each time I spoke to Nancy she told me to pull myself together otherwise you would leave me." Derek looked out towards Elliot Bay as he continued to talk, feeling Addison place her hand over his that was resting on her thigh. "So many nights, I'd get ready to go home, I'd even get outside our house and I couldn't go in, because I was worried that you wouldn't be inside. I'd screwed up and you deserved better. You deserved so much better," he slowly brought his gaze up to meet Addison's. "You still do."

"Don't say that." Addison responded instantly, looking into her husband's eyes. "You'd actually get outside our house?"

"Right outside the front door, key in hand, everything."

"I wasn't going anywhere, most nights I fell asleep on the sofa because I didn't like going to bed without you."

"I screwed up, Addie. You could have easily walked away and got on with your life, met someone new and it wouldn't have surprised me. It would have hurt, but I'd have to deal with it. Just like this whole thing with Mark, I hate it, and then seeing you two together made me feel sick, Addison. But I'm gonna have to deal with it, because you're my wife and I love you. It's not something I'm going to suddenly forget about overnight, but I'm going to work on it."

"I'll work on this whole Meredith thing, too."

"If we stick together, if we actually talk about things, we'll manage it. I'll make sure I don't become distant again, and if you notice that I am, tell me, yell at me to stop it, drag me away from the hospital and make me talk."

Addison couldn't help but smile ever so slightly at his words, he was actually going to work on everything, even with what she'd told him and what had happened, he was going to work on everything. "No more staying late unless you have to, and if you are going to, you have to let me know before."

"Promise." Derek agreed, leaning towards Addison and softly pressing his lips against hers for a few seconds before pulling away. "Back to the hotel?"

"I think that's best." Addison agreed, slowly standing up from the bench and waiting for Derek to stand up and pick up the take-out boxes and throw them in the trash before walking back over to her. As she felt him take her hand again, Addison leant against him ever so slightly as they walked, they were making their marriage work, it was going to work and she couldn't be much happier right at that moment. "Are you cold? You can have your jacket back if you are."

"I'm fine, Addie. The second you take it off, you'll complain that it's too cold, so keep it on."

"Thank you."

It wasn't a particularly long walk back to the hotel, but it felt a lot longer than it was. Both of them just wanted to get into their warm hotel room and out of the cold Seattle air. So, when they walked through the entrance doors to their hotel, Addison pulled Derek towards the elevators, pressing the button a couple of times before leaning against him slightly.

"Someone's in a hurry." Derek teased, wrapping his arm around her waist as he held her close to himself.

"And you wouldn't do the same?" She looked up at him with a raised brow, and seeing the look on his face, Addison laughed softly. "Exactly."

When the elevator doors opened, Derek gently pushed her inside and pressed the button for their floor before leaning against the back of the elevator, pulling Addison back against him. "Addie?"

"Mmhmm?"

"You mentioned going back to New York, when Nancy was here. Do you really want to?" He still wasn't sure how he felt about the whole thing, both Seattle and New York had memories that neither wanted to remember and both had some they wanted to remember as well.

Addison turned around in his arms so that she was facing him, still gently leaning against her husband as she spoke. "I don't know. I miss it, I miss New York, Central Park, Fifth Avenue, Broadway, I miss it all. But Seattle isn't as bad as I make out it is."

Derek chuckled at her words, slipping his hands around her waist underneath his jacket, gently rubbing her back as he spoke. "I know it's not. Seattle has ferry boats. Maybe we could take a trip back there, see everyone, do everything we said we were going to do but never did."

"Seriously?" Addison asked just as the elevator doors opened at their floor.

"Seriously." Derek replied, moving away from the wall, keeping his arm around her waist as they walked down the hallway to their room. "I'll talk to Richard tomorrow, get us some time off and we can head back home for a week or so."

Addison's smile grew at the sound of Derek calling New York 'home', it was always going to be his home, she knew that, he'd grown up there and between them, they had so many memories there. But even after everything, it was comforting to hear him say it. "Sounds perfect."