Disclaimer: I own nothing!
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What is Cake?
Chapter 3
It was very difficult for Duo to wait for nightfall to infiltrate the cake factory. He was constantly checking the clock and whining when the hands weren't moving fast enough. Duo was about to turn to the clock again when Heero grabbed his braid.
"Turn and whine again and I'll kick your ass." Heero threatened darkly. After a few hours of Duo whining over and over he was done. Duo turned to the clock again and whined overdramatically with a grin on his face. Then the world went dark.
Duo woke up a few hours later trying to figure out what the hell had happened to him. Heero was standing over their plans with a grim look on his face. Duo stood slowly checking for any broken bones or pain that wasn't there before he fell asleep. The only pain he noticed was a dull ache on the back of his head. The American walked over to the table and looked at the blueprints to see what made Heero's face show emotion. He saw the problem immediately.
Instead of actual plans written down there were stick figures labeled with large numbers around the building. Each figure was holding an undetermined item as arrows pointed the stick men into the factory. In one corner was a large dragon or dinosaur eating what appeared to be a banana. A UFO seemed to circle above the place shooting a green laser at what might have been a poorly drawn gundam or mobile suit.
"You know we don't have our gundams right Duo?" Heero asked with a little concern their plan wouldn't work.
"What are you talking about!? That's not a gundam. It's a giant ape. OBVIOUSLY." Duo hoped Heero bought that since he didn't know what else the large drawing could be.
"What are you two even talking about?" Wufei looked over Duo's shoulder to see the gundam ape. "Are you two nuts? That's a crane with a wrecking ball." Trowa picked that moment to walk back into the room and he promptly turned around and walked out.
"Where are we going to get a crane with a wrecking ball?" Duo asked with a frown.
"Where are we going to get a dinosaur…" Heero snorted. Duo elbowed him.
"You should know. I put those there as possible area defense on the factory." Duo nodded and continued "the dinosaur would be excellent ground control and the UFO could keep aircrafts from entering the airspace. To stop the dinosaur you give it a banana and it will eat it. The UFO though… I didn't get that far." All the pilots were now in the room and just staring at Duo like he had gone insane.
"Duo, Where the hell is a cake factory going to get a UFO or a dinosaur?" Wufei's eyebrow began to twitch slightly at the braided boy's lack of intelligence.
"Just precautions. Nothing too crazy." Duo shrugged. "Can we go yet?" Quatre turned to the clock with a thoughtful frown.
"We should probably wait about an hour or so before we leave. Then, it will be dark when we get to the factory to make sneaking in a little easier." Quatre said as the voice of reason. Duo just sighed darkly and slumped down over the plans. "Duo, why don't you pack your bags or something?" Quatre suggested hoping to give Duo something to do. Duo sat up with a large grin.
"You're right! I'll go get the necessary items!" Duo bolted out of the room excited.
Once he made it into his room Duo thought about the plans he had talked about. He dove into his closet in search of a few things. It took him about fifteen minutes or so, but he found almost everything he needed. He had bubblegum, rubber bands, a giant banana, a paper clip, and a toilet paper roll. Duo had never felt more secret agent ninja guy. With an accomplished look on his face Duo returned to the kitchen and rolled up the plans before sliding them into a cardboard tube.
The rest of the hour passed slowly, but finally they all filed out of the apartment and walked to the bus stop. The pilots missed the first bus and had to wait an extra 5 minutes or so for the next one which killed Duo on the inside. When they all made it on the bus Duo stared out the window as the bus made its way through town towards the factory. Duo choked when he saw Relena still standing where they had left her in front of the corner bakery.
"Wow, I thought she recovered faster than that." Heero murmured as he leaned to see her better. "Oh well." Duo just laughed until he couldn't breathe anymore.
The last bus stop was still about a mile away from the factory, so the guys had to walk the rest of the way. None of them minded, they had walked further before. Of course close to the end of the walk the pilots realized just how long they had been inactive. They were panting and sweating before the factory was even visible at all, and by factory they saw a large cement gate with barbed wire on top.
Duo looked at it in shock. "I didn't put this in the plans!" He stomped his foot and began walking again muttering curses under his breath. The other guys just looked up at the fence with worried faces. It took a little bit of walking to find an entrance to the factory and when they finally did Duo sighed in relief. "Ok this is exactly like my plans say."
"It's a normal entry for any factory Duo." Wufei shook his head slowly.
"Either way! This is the same!" Duo grinned. Duo walked through the gate and onto the factory grounds. He looked around for any sign of the dinosaur or UFO. Finding no sign he turned to the other pilots and waved them in. They crept forward trying to be as quiet as possible. Trowa stepped on a crunchy leaf in the middle of the pathway. Everyone flinched and waited. There was only silence for a moment, before a low growl sounded a few feet away.
Heero spun his eyes wide he pointed up high and yelled "GODZIRRA!!!!" The pilots all screamed and bolted toward the factory doors. The large dinosaur chasing after them roaring his displeasure. About half way to the door a green laser shot the ground a few feet from them. Duo screamed like a little girl seeing her idol.
"I told you so!" Duo screamed. The other pilots were just baffled and confused.
"How did they get a freaking dinosaur!?" Quatre yelled as another explosion lit up the air. Duo was just laughing maniacally about how he was right. Quatre didn't get an answer.
The pilots piled into the door and slammed it shut behind them. A little pale and hyperventilating they moved further into the factory. Trowa watched the back while Heero went first, pointing a nerf gun in front of him. Duo pulled out the rubber bands and wrapped one around his thumb. There was a garbled yell and a thump. Heero called out something as he fired his nerf gun. Trowa yelled for help has he was being overtaken by little cloaked men. Quatre fired his super soaker and pushed them back. Duo released a rubber band into what he thought was an eye. He was rewarded with a cry of pain. Wufei just pulled out a foam katana and began beating the little men with it.
When the last little guy went down a deep voice from the ceiling laughed and said "Boss battle. FIGHT!" The pilots looked up at the ceiling confused. Duo snapped his head in front of him, he could hear high pitched gibberish. There was a loud war cry as a larger cloaked guy jumped around the group. Heero fired a nerf bullet at the man, but he was too fast and flipped away. Heero growled and jumped after it firing rapidly. The cloaked man flipped back and grabbed Heero's gun and fired a bullet between the pilot's eyes. Duo watched in amazement as Heero stumbled and fell in slow motion.
"Nooooooo!" Duo ran also in slow motion to catch Heero as he fell. Heero slammed against the floor dramatically. "Heero! Don't die on me! We still need you to complete the mission!" Wufei rounded on the strange man swinging his foam sword quickly. The man yelled and swung his pool noodle into Wufei's shin with a loud 'thwack!' Duo turned as Wufei stumbled and fell to one knee still swinging with a pained look on his face. "Wufei! NO!" Duo could only watch as the pool noodle slapped the Chinese boy in the side of the head throwing Wufei to the side dramatically. Quatre fired his super soaker desperately at the cloaked being. The man spun avoiding the water bullets with ease. Using his pool noodle the cloaked man slapped the gun away and began beating Quatre again and again. Trowa yelled out as he jumped on the man and began beating the cloaked man with a squeaky mallet. Duo turned arming himself with another rubber band. He fired it at the man and missed. Trowa cried out in pain as a welt from the rubber band appeared on his arm.
"What the hell Duo! I thought we all had soft weapons!!" Trowa growled rubbing his arm where the red mark had raised up a bit.
"Sorry!! I didn't think it would hurt that bad." Duo looked at his shoes embarrassed.
"Well isn't that cute." The cloaked man said darkly.
"I thought you could only speak gibberish." Heero muttered looking up from being dead.
"Obviously we have a timeout on our hands." He pointed at Duo. "He's cheating."
"I AM NOT!" Duo yelled in frustration. "How was I supposed to know there were rules in this battle!?"
"Whatever. Duo you're out for cheating. Act dead." Wufei turned and looked at Duo with a frown. With an angry grunt Duo flopped down and acted dead.
"Now that THAT has been dealt with… let's try this again." The old man sighed then let out more shrieking gibberish as he launched himself at poor Trowa who was the only pilot left. Trowa blocked the pool noodle with his mallet just in time to block another swing. He was stuck in a defensive battle. Finally, Trowa decided he had had enough. He ducked under the noodle swing and swung his hammer onto the cloaked man's head with a loud 'SQUEAK!" The cloaked man cried out and swung forward in a violent death. When it was all settled Trowa looked at his fallen comrades and saluted them before turning away.
"Glad that's finally over." Heero mumbled and stood up stretching slightly. "How long was I on the floor anyway?"
"Not too incredibly long." Wufei laughed slightly. The old guy cackled and stood up.
"That was the most fun I've had in a while. Thank you boys!" The cloaked man turned and left the factory the way they had come in.
"Hope he knows there's a freaking dinosaur out there." Duo said as he watched the door swing shut. A loud roar and a scream told him that the old man hadn't known about the dinosaur. "Well… Sucks to be him. Let's get moving." Duo turned to walk deeper into the factory with a laugh that echoed off of the walls. The other pilots followed after the American with smiles on their faces thinking that maybe this bet could be fun after all.