Author Note: I am so glad that everyone loved the Karaoke chapter! Now for some sage advice from an old married man

Chapter 05 – Red's Advice

Eric woke up with the bright April sunshine pouring through the slats in his vertical blinds. He was blinded by the light or the huge headache that rumbled like a migraine. Where was he and how did he get here? He squinted and recognized his tiny apartment. Aspirin. He needed that and lots of it.

How much did I drink last night? He padded to the refrigerator and pulled out some orange juice. A quick glance at the clock confirmed that it was only 9:30 in the morning but man that sun was bright! There was a rapping on his door so he stepped over to peer out the window. Fez. He opened the door.

"Hey buddy – isn't it a little early to be up?"

Fez grinned. "Oh Eric, you were so naughty last night! Are you alone in there?"

"What? Yes, I'm alone, why would you think I wasn't." Fez pushed his way inside to confirm that Eric was indeed alone. "Rhonda and I saw you making out with Jackie and thought…"

Eric groaned, he did remember that and felt like an ass. He was almost ready to jump her bones because the dance was arousing. Hell, just being around Jackie was exciting. "No, did you check her apartment?"

"No, because Brooke and Kelso are sleeping over – have you ever waked Kelso in the morning? I do not want to get frogged! I thought I'd check you first. You wouldn't hurt as much." Eric reached out and frogged him just for the comment.

"Aiiy! Such a bully! Anyway, get dressed because we always go out for pancakes after Karaoke." Fez was still rubbing his arm. "So get dressed at meet me at Jackie's." Fez turned, "Eric how was it?"

Eric ran his hand through his tousled hair, "How was what?"

"Kissing Jackie you idiot! Aiiy! She didn't slap you silly so it must have been good. Fez needs to know these things!"

Eric grinned. "It was good. It was better than good, but hey don't say anything!" Fez walked down the hallway laughing as Eric shut his door.

*

One of Jackie's favorite things in the world was Karaoke Morning Breakfasts. She got up early, showered and put on some jeans and a tank top. She was pulling her hair into a high pony tail when Brooke stumbled out of the bedroom. "God, how much did I drink last night?"

Jackie grinned. "Only enough that you sang like the angels!" Brooke beamed at the compliment. "I did, didn't I? Now I have to buy that soundtrack for next month. Hey, I need a towel for the shower."

Jackie grabbed some towels and extra shampoo and went to watch some morning news while her friend got up and dressed. Within seconds of the shower water being turned on, Kelso was up and running around in his boxers. "Where's Brooke?"

Jackie pointed towards the bathroom door. "Thanks Jackie!" Jackie never looked, but heard Brooke's squeal as Kelso joined her in the shower. Fez knocked on the door then opened it with his key.

"Morning Jackie – how about that crazy dance of Eric's, eh?" Fez was trying to get a rise out of her. Jackie merely smiled, "He told me can't dance and now we get a few beers under his belt and look out John Travolta!"

Fez frowned – Jackie was saying nothing about that hot kiss everybody saw. Fine! "Eric will be along soon. I told him we go out for pancakes. Oh, pancakes with all those sweet tasty syrups. I can't wait!"

A second knock on the door and Fez opened it up to a neatly dressed Eric Forman. Jackie smiled and pointed to the sofa. "You may as well sit. Michael joined Brooke in the shower so hopefully they won't take too long!"

Fez was grinning. "I bet they are doing it!"

Eric and Jackie shouted, "Fez!" Kelso popped his wet head out of the bathroom door. "Eric's here?" He closed the door and came back out naked except for a towel wrapped around his waist." Jackie muttered ironically, "Where have I seen this before?"

Eric laughed and told Kelso to get dressed. Brook followed shortly with her hair in a towel and discreetly covered. "We'll be quick." She promised. The second bedroom door shut and the waiting trio heard, "Michael – not again!"

Jack shook her head and turned the television volume up higher.

*

The coffee was excellent and Eric was glad his friends invited him. New pictures of Betsy were passed around and Eric relayed the Hyde remarriage information. He watched Jackie's face for a reaction to the news but she seemed unfazed. Good.

The waitress brought over five breakfast plates. Eric looked at his pancakes with a side of bacon. This was a breakfast! Jackie had strawberry waffles as did Brooke. Kelso chose a chocolate pancake with a whipped cream happy face. Eric looked at the pancake and glanced at Brooke. "It's the only way he or Betsy will eat pancakes. I think it's genetic." Eric grinned at her apt description of his friend.

Fez chose blueberry waffles with strawberry topping and Eric watched as he poured all flavors of syrup on each edge of the waffle. This was so strange having breakfast with his friends and at the same time seemed so incredibly normal. He felt a bit guilty because he usually had breakfast with his folks. But, he was a grown man and this was what grown men do.

Friendly conversation filled the air between bites of breakfast and before Eric knew it the waitress came over with the bill. Everyone threw in a twenty and finished what was on their plates.

Kelso stood up, "Me and Brooke have to go pick up Betsy. Why don't we get together in a couple of weeks and do a barbeque at our house?"

Fez clapped. "Excellent. I get to French braid Betsy's hair, yes?" Brooke smiled, "Only if you do mine too!" Eric nodded – he liked the idea and looked at Jackie to make sure she was going also. "Let me call you because I think I have a baby shower coming up. But I could probably come late?"

It was decided that the gang would meet again at Kelso's house.

*

Eric watched Jackie drive off after she dropped Fez and himself at the apartment. He stood there until he could no longer see her taillights. Why was he obsessed with the little devil? Granted he was drunk last night but damn, she was so hot! He could still taste her kisses and they made him shiver. Maybe he should go see his folks just for the foot in the ass reality check!

*

Red was in the garage cleaning tools when the Vista Cruiser pulled up. Eric saw that his mother had been planting her garden again and he smiled. He missed watching her complain about the rabbits stealing carrots. In fact, he missed a lot these past couple of years.

"Dad, can I talk to you?"

Red looked up – this was an odd request coming from his son. They never had conversations and if this was going to be one of those pansy ass heart to heart things, Red Forman wanted none of it.

Eric went to sit on the outside patio chair. Red pulled a couple of beers from the garage fridge and brought them over. His dad sighed. "So Eric, I hear you're doing well at your job. That's great."

Eric smiled – his dad was lousy at small talk but he was a smart man.

"Dad, I messed up bad by marrying Donna. I hurt you and mom and ruined over a year of my life I can never get back. I thought that when I got back from Africa I could just pick up where I left off but I'm learning that everything has changed."

Red let him continue. "I mean Hyde got married – wasn't married and now got remarried. I never even met his wife. Kelso and Brooke are raising this beautiful little girl and I missed out on watching my best friend's baby grow up because I was so consumed with trying to be with Donna. All of my friends went on to have these great lives and they continued the friendships without me. How do I get my life back?"

Red took a long swallow of his beer and looked at his son. "Eric – about you and Donna – that was a mistake when she didn't want your promise ring. The girl never wanted to be tied down. Then you left her standing at the alter because you got cold feet. I think you knew then you were too young to be married."

Red drank some more and continued. "Then you went to Africa to try and better yourself. Now that was the smartest thing you did; but coming back thinking she wanted to be your wife? Sometimes it's great to be impulsive, but when you promised to love honor and obey for the rest of your life, you just screwed yourself."

Eric moved the beer can back and forth between his hands – he couldn't argue with logic. Looking back now, all the signs were there but he was just too blind to see them. Donna was way out of his league but he had to have her because she was the neighbor girl and they grew up together. They knew everything about each other so there was nothing new to discover or share. A lot of it was about sex. He wanted it and she gave it freely. After the marriage they really had nothing more in common.

Red actually felt like a good dad for a change. He made his only son see the wisdom of his errors and the dumbass actually got it.

"Eric, you mother and I have been married for almost 30 years. Now I know that seems like forever, but when we got married it was because we were attracted to each other. I didn't know her and she didn't know me – we had to learn about each other. That's a foundation for a relationship. Yeah, I could have married Sally Peidmont from the old neighborhood but that was boring. Kitty was pretty and exciting and that attracted me. Of course if you ask her she'll tell you a different story."

"So Donna and I were essentially like brother and sister. Oh my God - we were Luke and Leia! That's why the marriage was never going to work! Dad, you are the best!"

Eric was going to hug his dad but Red stuck out his hand. "Son, I'm never going to get that emotional so….you're welcome."

Eric turned around. "Where's mom?"

Red tossed his empty can into the trash. "She went with Jackie to some flower show."

"Jackie? Jackie Burkhart?" Eric asked disbelieving. What was the devil doing with his mom? Red grinned when he saw Eric getting all worked up.

"Son, remember how you just said all of your friends went on to have great lives without you? Now before you start picking on Jackie, let me say she's been a godsend to Kitty. You were gone and Laurie is who knows where. We kind of took Jackie under wing when Pam took off for Acapulco and Jack Burkhart's parole request was denied. She has the crappiest parents. So while you were in Africa you're mom kind of guided her."

"Why didn't anyone tell me this?"

"Well, Steven made her life a living hell so Kitty brought her over and taught her some girly stuff and the girl made a career out of it. Plus, your mom and I are reaping the benefits!"

Eric looked at his dad boasting. "Okay dad – I give. What are the benefits?"

Red smirked, "Let's see…your mom and I have been to Hawaii. That was last year. We camped at Yellowstone a few months ago. We took a cruise to Mexico last month and next month we are taking a sleeper train to Washington to the visit the Smithsonian."

Eric was dumbfounded. "Why didn't we take awesome vacations like that when I was a kid?"

Red grinned, "Because Jackie didn't work as an event planner and get great perks at her job. Don't underestimate her son that girl is good at everything she does and she thinks of us as her parents. So, don't go getting jealous!"

*

Jackie pulled into the Forman driveway and saw the Vista Cruiser parked next to the garage. Kitty looked out the passenger window. "Look, Eric came for a visit."

"Mrs. Forman, I'll just let you out so you guys can visit."

Kitty tittered. "Nonsense Jackie – I want you to come in for some coffee. We still need to look at those catalogs."

"But I thought you'd like to spend some time alone with your son." Jackie argued. Kitty looked at her. "Honey, we love it when you come over. Eric will just have to learn to share." Then she winked. "Come in, do it for me."

Jackie smiled and turned off the ignition. Red came over when Jackie popped the trunk lid. "Hello ladies. What did you buy today?"

Eric walked over to see what was in the trunk. He saw Jackie smile at his Dad. "We got Mrs. Forman some tulips and ground cover plants that will help get rid of the bunnies."

Red frowned, "So I can't shoot rabbits anymore?" Jackie and Kitty looked at him aghast. Kitty said, "Red, I don't want blood on my vegetables." Jackie lifted out a flat of fresh strawberries, "Hey Eric, can you carry these into the kitchen for me?"

Eric was spellbound. Jackie's little tank top was gaping at the top and he could see a good amount of cleavage. Her skin had a thin sheet of perspiration and it was glowing in the warm April sun – he wanted to taste it so bad. "ERIC! Help me." She nearly shouted.

Eric woke from his daydream and took the box from her arms. "Sorry, I was thinking about something else." Kitty followed Eric into the kitchen while Jackie carried the catalogs. Kitty looked at the guys standing around. "Red why don't you and Eric go do something, us girls have business!"

Red liked looking at Kitty these days. She just seemed younger than her years and more vibrant. Maybe it was all those vacations or she was just happier but whatever it was, Red loved it! He gave his wife a squeeze. "I'll be in the garage – if you need to lift something heavy, call me."

"Oh Red, you are such a sweetheart." Kitty tittered.

*

Eric was ushered outside with his dad. He looked in the glass door and watched Jackie and his mother pour over flower catalogs and they just looked so happy and excited. He wondered why his mom never had that kind of relationship with his ex-wife.

Red saw Eric staring. "Eric, leave them be. Your mom's happy and I get to drink beer in the garage. This is a good Saturday."

Eric turned, "Do you think Donna and mom would have ever been that close?" Red looked at the two women laughing in the kitchen. "No, Jackie and Kitty have more in common than Donna ever would have. Don't mix apples and oranges where women are concerned."

Eric couldn't help look back and got caught when Jackie looked up and smiled at him with a twinkle in her eye.

*