Okay, so, the rating isn't going up in this chapter. But it will in the next one- I promise ;) Review, let me know what you think so far. Sorry if this ones a little slacky, I'm tired, I wrote it early in the morning lol. Regardless, I hope you all enjoy.

Jen jumped, suddenly fully aware of everything around her. The room was bright; it was really early. She groaned when her shoulder protested against her sudden movement and she pulled herself to sit up. It had been the strangest dream, she thought about it- at least what she could remember. She managed her way to the edge of the bed, cursing softly at the pain as blood coursed its way through her entire body properly now that she stood. She stumbled a little but made her way toward the bathroom, pausing momentarily near the door when she heard Ducky telling Jay stories down in the kitchen. She tried desperately not to think about the dream she'd been having, it was dreadful, and it was painful. She figured, though, it hadn't been a dream entirely but in fact a memory mixed in with a dream.

She finally made her way downstairs, her expression clearly troubled as she sat down at the table slowly, wincing at the pain in her arm. "God, of all the times I've been shot, I have to admit shoulder is the worst. I can't do anything without it hurting." She sighed, smiling warily at her son who looked slightly worried. "I'm alright, why don't you go upstairs and read for a while, while I talk to Uncle Ducky?" She suggested, although her eyes right out asked him to go upstairs without question.

Jay nodded a little, sliding off of his chair and making his way toward the stairs. He half hugged his mother when he passed, being careful of his shoulder. "I hope you feel better today." He said quietly before kissing her on the cheek and running away.

Jen smiled a little, watching him run off. "I definitely did something right with him." She laughed softly, looking up at Ducky once they were finally alone. "Tell me. What happened after I left Jethro?" She asked, resting her good arm on the table and resting her chin on her hand, watching him expectantly.

"Ah, you remember now?" He said quietly, watching her body language warily, gauging the pain she showed. "Have you taken any painkiller today?" He asked, wanting to make sure she was all right before she stressed herself out with learning the last eight years.

"Yeah, I took some upstairs. Now please tell me." She said rather sternly, letting him know that even though she'd taken something, the pain hadn't quite dulled yet.

"The most I know, Jennifer, is that after you left you continued to do off-shore work. You continued working in Europe and in the East and he stayed here and buried himself in his work after he ended up marrying Stephanie." He shrugged slightly. It was really the best he could offer, they hadn't talked much until she'd come back as the Director.

"So he did marry her." She said quietly, her eyes darkening slightly in a jealousy her old self would have thought was long gone.

"Oh yes, but he got so involved with his work they ended up fighting and divorcing anyway. He was quite hung up on you, my dear." He told her, getting up to get some tea for her. It had always helped relax her before. He set the hot tea in front of her and sat down again, almost smiling when she looked relieved that Jethro and Stephanie had divorced.

"So… He did marry her after I left, but they fought because of a lack of communication and… You really think he was that hung up on me?" She asked, clearly desperate for an answer.

He simply nodded, "He seemed very upset when you left him on that plane. He even tried living in Moscow at one point. Do you remember why you left?" He asked, knowing she hated it when he picked at her brain, but he needed to know how much she recalled.

"Yeah. I remember… He had been on the phone with her and we were on a stake out… I don't remember what he said but I remember being extremely angry at him- of course I was emotional from my hormones being crazy... and I had just found out I was pregnant with Jay. Jethro said I kept assuming and jumping to conclusions because of what I had heard him say to her," She sighed with frustration. "Damn it, why can't I remember what he said?" She cursed quietly, her body language letting on that she was more frustrated than she cared to show.

"Stephanie had always suspected that there was something between the two of you, but she was never sure." He explained, "But, of course you know, communication is not exactly Jethro's strongest characteristic, hmm?"

She smiled weakly, taking another small sip of her tea. "No, I guess you're right. But him and I seemed to have no trouble communicating. I mean, we didn't talk a lot but it was like we always knew what the other was thinking." She said quietly, "I don't get it. Am I the only one like that?" She asked, "Am I the only one who can talk to him without it leading to a fight about miscommunication?"

"It seems that way, yes. At least, as far as I can tell." He nodded, "Do you remember anything from after you left?" He asked, watching her carefully.

"I remember… Working in the east- Cairo. That's where I met Ziva." She said quietly, "I remember being surprised that Mossad had officer's so young. But she was a damn good agent. She saved my life. She was also the first person I'd been with after Jethro." She smiled thoughtfully at the memory.

"I always suspected there was something more than a working relationship between you and Ziva." He chuckled, relaxing a little at her thoughtful smile. "Anything else? We don't need to go into detail about anything right now we just need a basis to work from."

She shook her head, "Not really. I don't remember much more after that." She sighed, slouching back in her chair slightly. "Guess it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all, right?" She sighed again, sitting up and taking a drink from her mug of tea. She stood, taking a deep breath to steady herself before making her way across the kitchen. "I think… Maybe I should go live with my mother- at least for a few weeks. Maybe that will help me get some more of my memory back," She suggested, turning to face him.

"I assure you it's no problem that you're staying here, Jennifer, but if you think it will help you I'm not going to stop you." He smiled a little more, "I will help you the best I can, my dear." It truly was the best he could offer.

"Thank you, Ducky." She said quietly, setting the empty cup down on the counter and making her way out of the room. "I'll send Jay back down, I know he enjoys hearing your stories." She chuckled.

"Thank you, I do enjoy telling them!" He called after her.

She laughed softly, making her way up the stairs slowly. "Jay, you can go listen to the rest of his story now." She said softly when she passed him in the hall. She walked to the room she currently occupied and closed the door, making her way over to sit on the bed. She thought hard for a few long moments about what possibly happened after Ziva. She vaguely remembered being the Director of NCIS… But it was so blurred, she couldn't be sure. She sighed deeply and dug for her phone in her bag, turning it on and going through the contacts. She made a face at a few names she didn't really recognize, but finally found the number she was looking for. She sighed deeply before hitting send to connect the call. She waited anxiously for a few moments for someone to pick up and relaxed a little when someone did. "Mom?" She said quietly, hearing the rather exasperated reply on the other end. "Yes, it's Jenny. No. I assure you I'm very much alive… Can I ask you a favor?"

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