AN- Omg I only just realised I uploaded chapter 12 from my other story last time!! haha well the right one is up now. Seriously next time somebody please let me know!! Enjoy ..
BPOV
It's hard to explain exactly how I felt at that moment. Curled up in a cocoon of my bed covers. I couldn't stop rocking myself, I suppose it was a natural reaction to try and comfort myself but it really wasn't working. He had offered me everything. He wanted to make things right. He wanted us. He wanted me.
That was something I couldn't comprehend.
I wish I could cry. That would be a justification for me still being here, under the covers, after 4 hours. I had cried every single tear I had though, my puffy red eyes were proof enough. His words had stung and my fucking stupid heart told me to defend myself, to just go ahead and shout at him. I wish everyday that my head was stronger than my heart. I wouldn't be in this horrible mess if it was. Though thanks to my heart I had Renesmee, a sacrifice I was not willing to make. I still loved him with every fibre of my being. Every single inch of him. From his messy ginger hair to his incredibly smelly toes. I smiled to myself knowingly. Edward may well be beautiful but his feet really did stink. I vowed to myself there and then to not to ever write about somebody being relived to smile again because in reality it was fucking painful. The muscles in my face must have set in the crying position because it felt like smiling was going to rip it in half.
I untangled my legs from each other and threw myself backwards onto the bed. It felt amazing to breathe in air that hadn't been trapped under the covers with me. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, filling my lungs. I lifted my arms above my head and stretched my fingers until they met the wall above the headboard. Every single bone in my body cracked and groaned and I drifted into a deep sleep.
I woke up to the smell of freshly ground coffee and pastry. I turned to the ceiling and silently thanked whatever kind of God was up there for giving me the most well trained daughter in the world.
"Ness! I'm up." This was our routine. When we knew the other was sad we'd bring them coffee and pastry in the morning and sit outside their room until they woke. I heard the bedroom door open and the weight on the other side of the bed as I turned to grab my coffee. Nessie snuggled up to me, moments later I felt her eyes on my face. I looked down to be met by concerned brown eyes.
"Mom. Are you okay?" I nodded at her before taking another sip.
"No really. I don't want you to lie about it any more. I'm big enough and ugly enough to understand that you hurt sometimes. I grew out of thinking you were Wonder Woman a long time ago Mom. Emmett kind of ruined that one." She scrambled across the bed to the TV and put in Labyrinth before turning to me and beaming.
"Nessie, you know its not okay to think David Bowie is hot, especially in lycra." She smacked my arm playfully.
"You have no right, you fancy my Dad sicko." I couldn't help but laugh at her statement. She jumped back into my bed resting her head on my shoulder.
"You still didn't answer the question properly." I sighed before placing my coffee down and sitting up so I could look at her.
" Nessie. I'm honestly fine. I overreacted yesterday purely because I didn't know what was the right way to act. I still love him Ness I just don't know what to do. When he left he took my best friend with him. The one person who convinced me that every decision I made was the right one and when he left I stopped believing in myself. If it hadn't been for Alice and Rose finding my first novel and sending it to the publishers themselves. We wouldn't be here still. He hurt me so bad, it just freaks me out a little that in my heart he's forgiven. It's as if nothing changed. Do you understand sweetie?" She nodded at me slowly.
"Meh thinking with your head isn't always all it's cracked up to be." She shrugged her shoulders her attention fixed on the movie. I stared at her in disbelief. She was such a hippy sometimes. I almost expected her to come home in a skirt made from wheat and tell me she'd burnt all her underwear. I shook my head at her and continued to watch the movie.
"Actually thinking about it ... I overheard something yesterday that I really didn't wanna hear" Her face was blank, giving me no idea what she was talking about.
"Care to elaborate my dear?" I look at her confused once again by her actions. I was the girls mother, the one person in the world that probably knew her better than she knew herself and she still kept me guessing. I watched as she pursed her lips before crumbling into the most disgusted face I had ever witnessed on another human being.
"You and Edward did the dirty the other night!" I thumped her hard on the head with a pillow and she burst into fits of giggles. Renesmee and I's relationship wasn't like regular ones mothers had with their daughters. She told me everything. She told me about all the boys she kissed. When she lost her virginity. It was a very open subject in our house. Though I still didn't appreciate her bringing up my dirty laundry.
She hit me back, almost knocking me off the edge of the bed and I couldn't contain my laughter as I bashed her repeatedly in the face chanting;
"I can bear it no longer! Goblin King! Goblin King! Wherever you may be take this child of mine far away from me!" We laughed for what seemed like forever before finally slumping back onto the bed exhausted.
"Ness, don't you think Emmett looks a bit like Ludo?" She laughed loudly before replying with "Yeah it's all in the tiny eyes."I chuckled looking to the screen quickly for confirmation and a loud snort left my nose. Nessie looked shocked and her mouth dropped open, I smacked her upside the head with my pillow again and she finally let out a titter.
"You know I just want you to be happy Mom?" I sighed and nodded at my daughter. She was far too grown up for her own good. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and pulled her to me. Rubbing my knuckles across her head.
"Arrrggghhhhh Mom. I'm trying to be serious."
I laughed loudly "You seem to forget I grew up with Emmett. I learnt how not to do serious from the best."
We spent the rest of the day watching 80's films and eating crappy food from the comfort of my bedroom. We were so relaxed we didn't realise the time.
"Bella? Ness?" We looked at each other as we heard Emmetts voice booming through the house.
"Where the fuck are you? Is this some kind of joke?" Ness and I chuckled. "Why are you in the bedroom? You know Alice is gonna freak if you're still in bed." He pushed open the door and I couldn't help but laugh when I saw his little beady eyes. Nessie soon caught on and she too burst into fits of giggles.
"What?" I saw a flash of mischief across Emmetts face but it was too late to warn Nessie, I turned to her only to find Emmett sitting on her.
"Omg. Cant. Breathe. Diet." It was quite clear Renesmee was struggling to cope with Emmett sitting on her.
"Emmett can you get your fat ass off my daughter, I do want her to have all her body parts functioning when she goes to college." I noticed Nessie look quickly to the floor as Emmett removed his ass from her chest. I shot her a confused look but she continued to stare straight at the floor.
"Ooooooohhh you haven't told her yet. You're so dead." Emmett stood pointing between me and Nessie a huge shit eating grin on his face.
I did my best I'm your mother now tell me what the fuck you've done now look to Renesmee and I watched her breaking. Her face went rapidly from guilt to anger and briefly to determination before finally settling on guilt again.
"Mom I ..." Renesmee started but was very quickly cut off by a great big oaf who liked to get everyone in trouble clearly.
"Bella. Ness isn't going to college. Guess who suggested it.. tell her Ness.." Emmett was still grinning. I didn't know whether to punch him in the face or kiss him. Renesmee looked to the floor again but this time she never looked up. She simply stood and left the room.
"I'm going to fucking kill him! I swear I'll kill him! Is this serious!?" I was about to burst out the room ready to drive to the Cullens house and kick Edwards ass but I was caught by a thick arm and lifted into the air. I kicked my legs out violently and tried to thrash out against Emmetts chest, but he really was built like a tree trunk.
"I swear to God Emmett McCarty if you don't put me down I'll .. I'll... Emmett put me down!! Or else!" I screamed but it was fruitless, Emmett didn't care, he knew I couldn't hurt him. The only person he was scared of was his wife. I don't blame him. Rosalie scared the shit out of me sometimes.
"Come on little one we need to get a drink in you and let your anger out without hurting yourself or anyone else in the process. You're gonna hate me for saying this Bella, but it's Nessie's choice at the end of the day. And .... he is her father." He winced as he said the last part and covered his crotch with his free hand.
"Oh Emmett I fucking hate you when you make sense."
AN- Chapter 13 has always been my weakness, I've finally written it so there you go .. let me know what you think. It's not much in the way of plot development but I think it's important we see some of Nessie and Bellas relationship. Too much Daddy for a story called Daddy wasn't there.
Seriously .. anyone else majorly love Labyrinth?