Disclaimer: Don't own them. not making any money.

A/N: this chapter is a little short but 5 should be up soon. Hope you enjoy!
Cyn

Shattered Dreams and Broken Hearts
Chapter Four

Serena pulled a pack of tissues out of her back pocket and dabbed at her cheeks. "Ok," she said. "No more crying. You don't need this right now." She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes like before. "I talked to the doctor. He said you could leave in a few days depending on how you're doing." I was about to say I feel fine now but her eyes flashed when my mouth opened. "You will stay here until the doctor says so Ricardo Manoso. You might 'feel' fine but it's better to be safe than sorry. He wants to make sure you don't get any infections or anything."

I'd be here for two more days, tops.

A blue jay flew past the window. What I intended to say went straight out the window in that moment. What came out of my mouth surprised us both. "Do you know about her?"

Serena flinched and looked back down. Guess I didn't need to elaborate.

"We've. . . I know about her," she said quietly.

"From me?"

Her head shook. "Some of the guys thought it would be helpful to inform me that I was just a substitution."

"You know everything that's happened between us?"

She nodded.

"Why did you marry me then?"

She stayed quiet for a minute before slowly saying, "I would rather be your second choice than another man's first choice."

"I couldn't have been that charming to you." Not that I wasn't capable of it, mind you. It's just always been Stephanie . . . Hasn't it?

She laughed but it held some bitterness to it. "Oh no, you definitely weren't as nice as you I might make you out to be." She looked back up at me. "You weren't cruel but we had our fair share of hard times. Our fights were bad in the beginning." Her lips twitched as she struggled not to smile. "I was needy after that incident. You were a workaholic. After you taught me some self defense, whenever I got mad I would always attack and try to pin you. Whenever I thought I had you, you would flip us and hold me down with one hand, pinning my legs between yours." Again she blushed slightly and turned her head. "We ended up like that a lot. . . "

I didn't doubt that one bit.

Again we fell silent. It was awkward and calming at the same time.

My eyes wouldn't focus on anything but Serena. My good hand twitched. I wanted to touch her. How much more fucked up could this get. My body was demanding to touch her, to own her, but my heart was calling for Stephanie. How could I pick one? Leave my wife for a woman I haven't seen in 4 years, or pray that my memory comes back and just maybe I could be happy with Serena and put Stephanie behind me. Problem is if that happens, could my past pain override my current feelings for Steph? What if my memory comes back but my feelings for Steph are still as strong as they are now? Could I pretend to love another woman for the rest of my life? Could I live a lie for Serena, just so I don't hurt her?

There was that word again. Hurt. I didn't want to hurt Serena. There must be a part of me that remembers and cares for her if I don't want to crush her heart. She's nothing to me now but a woman my body aches to touch that has my last name. Why should I care about the state of her heart? Why should I care what happens to her when I don't even remember her?

There are so many ways this could play out. At least one of us is going to get hurt in the process. Who will it be: me, Serena, or Stephanie?

Stephanie. . . .

Where are you Babe? What happened to us?

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Serena's head dropped slightly. How long had we stayed quiet? I must have gotten lost in my thoughts because Serena's eyes were fluttering, and her breathing was low and steady. She was about to fall asleep in the chair. Out of comfort or exhaustion, I didn't know. This woman signed up for a happy life and instead I was what she got.

Forgoing the nurse call button, I scooted over on the bed. It was a struggle not to take a deep breath from the pain but my ribs would have liked that a lot less.

Her head dipped again. "Serena," I called out softly.

She jerked, startled out of her chair. Her head shook as she said, "I'm sorry. It's been a long couple of days. I guess now that you're ok I'll be able to sleep a little better tonight." She tried for a smile but it didn't work. "I'll just go home now so you can get caught up with Tank."

I held out my good hand. It didn't waver and that made me feel a little better.

Her eyes widened. "Oh no, you don't need to do that! I'm a big girl Ric, I can deal with things. You don't need to push yourself to try and make me happy. I'll just go home," she said again and took a step towards the door.

"Serena," my voice was stronger this time. She froze with her back to me. "Come here."

"Don't –" her voice cracked.

"I'm not asking or promising anything right now. Just get your ass over here and sleep for a while Cherry."

Her whole body tensed. She turned slowly towards me. "What did you say?"

I suppressed a sigh. "Get over here and rest woman. If I have to get up and drag you over here neither one of us will be very happy."

A small smile ghosted past her lips. Great. So much for threatening her. Looks like my wife wasn't very worried about that happening.

I shifted on the bed, trying to get up when she laughed and calmly walked up to the bed. She hesitated for a minute but when I pulled the sheets back, she got in being careful how she moved.

My good arm was resting under her head, curling around her shoulder as she lay on her left side. Her fingertips lightly ran over the bandages on my chest.

That was as close as we could get without causing me anymore pain. It was . . . nice. My mind raced with images of me holding Stephanie but the woman curled against me now felt right in a way. My body couldn't forget what my mind chooses to keep from me.

Very slowly Serena's hand stilled. Her breathing evened again. She was fast asleep.

I laid there thinking for a long time. I fought to remember but the more I focused on things the further back in my mind they went.

I turned my head and rested it against Serena's. Her scent flowed across my body like waves across the sand. It fell over me, retreating fast before I could grab hold of it. A subtle feeling of knowing was all that was left.

I pressed my face closer to her and breathed in deep.

Cherry Blossoms.

A/N: Is Ranger's subconscious making a breakthrough? Or was that just a one time slip up? What path will Ranger choose? Who will have their dreams shattered? Who will have their hearts broken? Please review!