Disclaimer- I do not own The Outsiders

Previous Chapter

Darry walked back in then with the doctor. He sighed. "Alright, we're ready for it."

The doctor nodded. "Mr. Curtis has explained the situation to me. It goes against the laws but as Mr. Cade's parents seem to be…," he paused, "incapacitated, I will leave things up to you."

Soda kissed Pony's hand and turned around.

Doc continued. "While John's case is not as critical as Ponyboy's it is no less pressing. He suffered some eternal bleeding which we are able to fix, suffered broken ribs. However the most pressing issue is his back. John suffered several blows to his back, more then several. He needs surgery to stabilize but I'm afraid he may never walk again."

It grew silent. Oh glory if things were bad before now they have just gotten worse.

"Can we see him?"

"Visiting hours are almost over."

Darry sighed. "Please sir." Thank God one of is polite.

"Alright then. He is in room 234, on this floor." Sometimes I forget that we're all just kids. "I'll go tell him he has some visitors." Doc walked out of the room.

"Yawl coming?" I asked.

Darry said and did nothing but Soda shook his head. "I need to stay with Pony. I… I can't leave him alone. He wouldn't want to be by himself."

Darry walked over to Soda and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Pepsi, honey you go with Steve okay. I'll stay with Pony. I won't hurt him again. I promise."

Soda looked up. I wondered how Sodapop would react to Darry using his father's pet nic-name for him. He took a deep breath and mealy nodded.

He let go off Pony's hand and stood up. He leaned over and kissed Ponyboy's forehead. I've never seen anyone love their brother as much as Soda loves Ponyboy. I asked him once why he put up with him.

Soda had been awful tired, staying up with Ponyboy every night after his nightmares. I asked him why he didn't just let the kid alone, get his own room. Soda just smiled at me. He said he liked being with Ponyboy. He enjoyed talking to him. Pony made him feel needed for once in his life, like he has something extra to give, that he wasn't just a nobody.

Soda said that after his parents died he was so scared. He was so afraid of losing another loved one. When he was laying next to Pony at night he could hear his breathing, feel his heart beat. Staying with Pony during the nightmares was just as much a comfort to him as it was to Ponyboy. Besides, he loved his brother.

I never bothered Soda about it again. I understood, jealous as I was and still am, I understood. I only wished someone cared that much about me.

"I love you buddy. You be good for Darry. He loves you a lot. He never meant to hurt you."

I placed a hand on Soda's shoulder. "Come on buddy. Johnny will want some company."

He nodded and followed me out the door.

Johnny

My breath came out in heavy gasps. My arms and shoulders ache like crazy but nothing else. I can't feel nothing below the middle of my back. The doctor explained things to me.

Apparently when I was jumped those socs got me pretty good. I'm never going to walk again. Not with crutches, not with a walker, not with braces; he said it plainly that I'm never going to walk.

It's killing me. I can't feel my legs. I'm never getting out of this place. I'm stuck. I can't even take a crap or pee by myself. I'm never having kids. I'm a cripple, a cripple. My parents have got to take care of me now and I doubt they will.

And Pony. Glory Pony. He has got to be dead. There is no way he can go through that and live. I can still hear him screaming and see him struggling. There was nothing I could do. The socs had me and I dropped my blade.

Pony was a good kid. He has to be dead, I don't see how he could have survived. I should have helped him. He was just a kid. Oh man oh man. And his brothers. I know Darry hit him and all but he loved him. And Soda…

I tried not to cry. I had to be tuff. Poor Pony though. He was probably the best friend I ever had. If it wasn't for him I'd have done killed myself. What do I have to live for now?

It should be noted that I do not believe Johnny is a cripple. I was leaning on his own views of his self worth and low self-esteem.

Oh and Read Dream With Me. It is much better then Mother's Prayer and I would really like some feedback.