The Thousand Sunny docked by an island for the night. Nami had predicted very dangerous weather tonight and sleeping through it would be disastrous so they docked of on this island till the morning.
"Oi! Luffy!"
"Oh my God, I can't BELIEVE we're doing this...." Zoro hit his forehead again.
"What is it Sanji!?" Luffy popped his head up from the top of the stairs of the upper deck as Sanji called his name.
"We're gonna go to the baths in town... Wa~nna co~~me???" Sanji's voice was obviously hinting that he was trying to trap him in some sort of way. But of course, Luffy is to oblivious to notice, "But... don't we have baths on the ship?"
"Uhhh.... Yes! Yes we do! But... um.. you see.... uhhh.... They're broken!! Yeah! That's it! They re broken! So we should go to the baths at once to save.... uhhh... time of going individually!!"
"Good God you're an idiot..." Zoro couldn't take much more of this.
And of course... Luffy being Luffy... "............ Yeah! Sure!! I'm coming!"
"Ha! See that!" Sanji said confidently, "Look how eager he is to go take baths with NAKED MEN!"
"Jesus! You idiot! He's eager about sleep!!! You're so damn stupid!!!"
Franky was walking by as this went on, "Sanji-aniki, what are you talking about? The baths on the ship aren't broken-"
Sanji ran up to him and put his hand on his mouth, "SHHH!! You idiot! He'll here you! This is something I'm doing to find something out about Luffy! And when I find out it to be true (which I will) I'll tell you! Till then shut up and go about your life baka!!" Confused, Frank just walked away.
"*huff* You're the baka here! And Why do I have to go!?" Zoro had his arms folded angrily.
"Because! When I'm right, you need to be there so I can rub your face in it!"
"And just how the hell are you going to do this in the baths!?"
Sanji grinned and placed a hand on Zoro's shoulder, "Tisk, tisk, Marimo. When he's in there..... seeing all those naked men... He will reveal himself and HA! I will have proven that he is indeed homosexual!!!"
".... You're completely retired... not just a little bit, COMPLETELY.... How have you survived in the world for so long without someone killing you yet or you getting yourself killed???"
"Alright! I'm here! TO THE BATHS!!" Luffy was out of the ship now next to Sanji and Zoro and began walking into town.
"See! Once again... EGAR to see naked men."
"........... I'm running out of ways to express how stupid you are. God, this is going to end badly. We'll probably get kicked out or raped or something. If the rape scenario happens, I'm using YOU as a shield."
________________________________________________________________________________
At the public baths in town.
"AAAAAAAH. It feels so good." Luffy sunk into the nearest tub and placed his strawhat on his face as he laid back.
"Yes, I'm sure it does Luffy." Sanji grinned evilly. He whispered to Zoro, "No's my chance! Get ready Marimo! You're about to eat your words as much a Luffy probably likes eating dick! HAHAHA!" He dashed off to go 'prove' he is right. Zoro just sat in his tub with an annoyed and dull face, "Maybe YOU'RE the one who's gay...."
Sanji walked in front of Luffy slowly and as his face seemed to be in the appropriate place, Sanji dropped his towel around his waist. "OH NO!" Sanji said in a bad acting voice, "I DROPPED my towel!! MY PENIS IS EXPOSED!"
Zoro, in the background still in his tub, slapped his forehead.
Sanji looked at Luffy eagerly to catch him in the act of straying at his junk... but Luffy continued to have his head laid up with his strawhat on his face.
"AHEM! I SAID I DROPPED MY TOWEL AND MY PENIS IS EXPOSED!!!"
Zoro slapped his forehead again, "... Ok, that's starting to hurt."
Luffy looked up from under his hat, "Do you want me to get your towel Sanji?"
("AHA!") Sanji snickered, ("It's an obvious excuse to try and touch my junk!")
"Why tha~~nks Luffy! What a friend!" Once again his voice betrayed his stupidity and bad acting, but again, simple Luffy, never complicating anything, didn't notice.
He picked up the towel and handed it to Sanji, "There you go." And went back to just laying there with his hat on his face.
Sanji was very disappointed, he still didn't have enough proof that Luffy was indeed gay.
"Damn it... That didn't work! Why?" He went back to where Zoro was and sat on the tub rim to think.
Zoro sat up, splashing some water out of the tub, "Because he's NOT GAY!!!"
Sanji ignored him, "Maybe it's his taste in men... Hmmm... He must not like the twink type. I mean, let's face it, I'm DEAD SEXY, thin, blonde AND smooth, but I guess my body doesn't appeal to everybody."
"I want you to die... SO BAD...."
"Maybe he likes big burly men. The dumb brute type.... But he hasn't hit on YOU either."
"I wonder if I strangle you RIGHT NOW, who would notice and who would care, and who would look for you when I dumped your body in the ocean?"
(Sanji is still ignoring him) "I guess if we were his type he would have hit on us by now. He hasn't hit on the other guy's either."
"BECAUSE. HE. IS. NOT. GA~~~Y."
"Maybe.... AH! I got it! He likes HARY MEN! Probably a good beard gets him off, MAN THAT'S SICK!"
"No... strangling you is to simple and quick.... Wrapping a plastic bag around you.... Slow and agenizing.... YEAH, that's it..... Tying a string at the base so you can't get free......"
"I'LL BE BACK MARIMO! I HAVE A GAY BEARDED MAN TO FIND!" With that Sanji jumped up and ran around the baths looking for a bearded man.
Zoro sunk back into his tub, "........... I need to find a plastic back and some string before he gets back."
~
Sanji slowed down his running as he saw a giant fat man with a big thick beard. ("PERFECT!")
Sanji walked up to him and tapped him on the shoulder. "EHUR!?" The ugly fat man looked at him.
"Excuse me sir, but are you gay and like young men?"
*WHAM!!!*
~
Sanji sat on Zoro's tub again, this time having a big black eye coving most of his face.
Zoro had a satisfied smirk on his face, "THAT... just made my day."
"Oh shut up!"
"Oi! Sanji! Zoro! I'm done with my bath, I'm going to leave now! See you back on the ship!" Luffy had gotten out of his tub and went to the dressing rooms.
"Wait! Luffy!.... Uh... Don't you wanna stay for just a little longer!?"
Luffy looked at him puzzled, "Why?"
Zoro shook his head, "Don't mind him Luffy, we'll see you later."
"Ok! Bye Zoro!" And he walked off into the changing rooms.
"Well, since there's no reason more to be here, I'm leaving too." Zoro got up to get dressed.
"WAIT! I GOT IT!" Sanji stood up as well.
Zoro rolled his eyes, "What now?"
"PLAN B Marimo! Plan B for BOOBS!"
Zoro squinted his eyes, "........ You're stupid."
Sanji grabbed him by the shoulder very closely, "THINK ABOUT IT! WE NEED A WOMAN TO PROVE THIS!"
".... Uh... We are WAY to close, and I m naked..."
"GUAH!" He pushed Zoro away. "What's the matter with you! YOU ARE GAY! Tiring to feel up on me!!"
Zoro had enough, he reared back his fist.
"WAIT! NOT THE OTHER EYE!"
*WHAM!*
To Be Continued....