Disclaimer- I do not own The Outsiders

Thanks to all my reviewers

Week three; it's his third weekend at the clinic. He's coming home for the weekend. I should be looking forward to seeing him. He's my brother and I love him; but it just feels like something that was there isn't there anymore. I have an empty place.

Darry smiled at me as we pulled into a Dairy Queen about a mile and a half from the center. "This'll make a nice change from that hospital stuff."

I nod my head. Pony can eat solid food right now but he's still skinny as a rail. I hate that. He was always tiny but he used to be muscular. And now he can't even feed himself. He's so little, just so little. …

"You want anything Soda?"

My head popped up. "Um…."

"Burgers then?"

I nodded my head. I'd lost my appetite these past few weeks.

"Okay."

Darry shook his head. "Come on Soda. You have to eat."

"I said okay."

Darry sighed. "Alright then…."

* * * * * * * * *

"Hello Mr. Curtis."

Darry shook the doctor's hand. "Hello. Doctor Corbin."

Doctor Corbin smiled at the bag in Darry's hand. "Real food, Ponyboy will enjoy that."

"I hope so. How is he this week?"

"He gained five pounds." My head shot up. Five pounds wasn't a lot but….

"That's great."

Doc smiled. "He's sitting up as well."

A baby can sit up. I want a little brother who is real. I want my brother back.

Darry was grinning. "He was?"

"He is. His coordination is still horrible but we are working on that."

"I'm glad to hear it. And the other stuff."

"Will be worked out in time Mr. Curtis. We will have Ponyboy as well as we can fix him. I do however have concerns about his vision."

I bit my lip. If Pony was any part of his body he was his eyes. He loved to just look at stuff, sunsets and stars and stuff. He loved to read and draw. But I guess if your brain is fired the rest of the stuff is pretty pointless.

"What concerns Doctor?"

"I've noticed Ponyboy has trouble with tracking, and he seems off balance when reaching. I had an optometrist look at him. There is vision loss due to the injury or the seizures."

"What do you suggest you do?"

I kicked the dust at my feet. Why is it that we are always two steps forward and three steps back?

"We'll have more therapy and try glasses. It is all we can do."

Darry nodded. "Thank you."

"I guess you can see him now. I think he will like that."

"Thank you sir." Darry shook his hand again. "You ready Soda?"

I put my hands in my pockets and nodded.

I followed Darry down the long hallway to Pony's room. Pony was asleep. He sleeps a lot. I think there is something to do with energy levels or something. I don't know.

Darry sat the food on the bedside table. He walked over and put a hand on Pony's shoulder. "Pony, buddy wake up." My brother's eyes popped open. He didn't freak out.

When we got him home that first time before he came to the center he went wild. He clawed and bit at us. He was terrified, of his own home. Apparently he was scared. I am real sorry about that. How can someone be scared of his own home?

Pony smiled. He doesn't know who we are, not really, but he knows that he likes it when we come. He's a little baby in a fourteen year old's body. I never realized that there could be anything so much worse than death.

He looked better at least, skinny as a rail, but not as peaky. He looked more alive.

Darry sat on the bed. "Let's sit up huh? I got you some Dairy Queen. Hamburgers. They're really good."

If Darry had been half this gentle around Pony before the accident the whole mess never would have happened.

He helped Pony up. Pony gulped. I walked over. Something about him; I can't stand to see him like this but something compels me to. I most really care about him. How can you love the very cause of your pain? How can you stand it? I don't know. I just don't know.

"Hey Pony. You ready for another weekend?"

He smiled, just smiled. "I'll take that as a yes." My voice cracked.

Darry pulled out a half of a hamburger. "Here you go buddy. Take a bite." He put it to our brother's mouth. He made a mess of things.

I hate my life these days…….

As many of you know Thursday October 8th is Sodapop Curtis's Birthday. Forgoing his death in Nam are favorite hunky Greaser would be turning 60. As such I challenge everyone to write a oneshot without oc romance in honor of Soda. Can be about anything so long as Soda is the main character.

Cheers….

This is not the last chapter…….