Big thanks to sfchemist for her attention to the details and for helping me clear up some confusion with these last 2 chapters.

Ch. 6: The Long Road to Rialto

Mary sat staring out the window as the desert passed her by. It had been two hours since they had headed west on I-40 and two hours and five minutes since either of them had spoken.

The last thing Mary had said was when she had climbed into the SUV and stated that she wanted to keep going. Marshall had simply nodded and remained silent ever since, lost in his own thoughts and unaware of how the last words he had uttered to Mary were driving her to distraction.

"I thought you were sneaking out to meet Raphael."

That statement, in and of itself, would not have bothered her the way it did if it hadn't been revealed in connection with something Marshall had said earlier.

"…an assumption that made me angry."

Mary had spent the better part of the past two hours trying to come to terms with the fact that her partner had just admitted that the idea of her sneaking off to meet her ex-fiancé made him angry. A logical reason was that he was just concerned and didn't want her doing anything that might hinder her recovery. He was also her best friend, so not wanting to see her get hurt emotionally by hanging around a guy she knew was not good for her was also not unreasonable.

The problem was that as believable as both those explanations were, nothing seemed to soothe the nagging feeling in her in gut. Pulling her legs up to her chest, she wrapped her arms around them and rested her head on her knees, facing the window and away from her partner.

Trying to ignore her increasingly confusing emotions about the man in the driver's seat, she focused on the purpose of the trip. While she hadn't gotten very far in her search at the office, she had been able to pull up a current address for one Lauren Shannon Hefferman in San Bernardino, CA and that was the information that Marshall had found on her screen and printed out.

She had let out snort on seeing Lauren's middle name and wondered if the woman had any idea about the origin of her name prior to her trip to Albuquerque. Mary was actually surprised that her father had taken such a chance of exposing himself and questioned his intelligence, wondering how he managed to keep off the radar all these years.

Her musings turned once again to her father, not surprisingly considering he had become an obsession over the past few days. After Jinx had revealed that he was he was missing, again, Mary had latched onto the idea. Based on the fact that he had never returned to her, she assumed that the same would hold true this time. She hadn't allowed for any other possibility. But now that they were on the way to see his new family, she began to worry about what they might find and how she would react if this time he actually had come back.

After spending all the years since her seventh birthday dreaming about the day she would be reunited with her father, the idea of it becoming a reality was something she didn't think she was prepared for. In fact, she knew she wasn't prepared for it. It would mean learning the truth, whether she liked it or not. No more secrets and no more fantasies. She was already having problems with the truth killing her fantasies as never once did she imagine him having a new family. But then again, she had never imagined that Marshall would be at her side either.

Suddenly she felt like her brain was on a merry go round and kept circling back to the same thoughts. No matter what else whirled around inside her head, every time it came back to Marshall. He was right when he said that she wouldn't have told him her plans. Despite the fact that he'd proven himself over and over again, professionally and personally, gaining her trust in a way that no one else in the world had, she would still have come up with excuse after excuse not to tell him.

The bond she shared with her father was her last line of defense. It was the only secret she had left and what she held onto when nothing else in the world made any sense. It made her feel loved and special and without it, she was afraid she'd fall into a million pieces and never recover.

Over the past few years, Marshall had somehow pushed and pushed until he was able to worm his way into her life. She hadn't even realized it at first, not until the Horst incident, just how important he had become and how much needed him in her life. And in that moment, she knew if push came to shove, she'd have to choose between betraying her father's confidence or risk losing her partner; and it scared her to death.

She felt the car begin to slow down and extracted herself from her fetal-like position as she looked over at Marshall.

"Need gas," he said, pointing his chin toward the gauge on the dash. "Besides, it's lunch time and I thought you might be hungry."

She knew him well enough to know that what he really meant was that he was hungry. Still, she accepted the gesture for what it was; a means of reopening the lines of communication. Their partnership couldn't work, didn't work, unless they were in sync. Even though this was a personal matter, they each had a role to play and they had both been silent long enough.

"I guess I could eat," she answered, throwing him a half smile and stretching her limbs, hoping that her stomach wouldn't growl as she realized just how hungry she was.

Mary walked into the truck stop to get them a table while Marshall filled the tank of the SUV. Ordering coffee for both of them, she sat in a booth near the window and watched him run his hand through his hair in frustration as he talked into his cell phone.

After Mary had left him alone at the gas pump, Marshall had decided he would use the time to call Stan. It was already Sunday afternoon and they wouldn't arrive in California until evening, so he knew he wouldn't be in the office the next day. As he considered what they were going to be doing, he decided it was highly unlikely that they would head back to Albuquerque before Tuesday, if not later, and their boss was not going to be happy. He hit the speed dial; glad Mary was out of earshot.

"Stan," stated the voice at the other end of the phone.

"Hey Stan."

"What happened? I thought you were going to be entertaining Mary this weekend. Please don't tell me we have an emergency," Stan said, knowing full well that he should have expected that his first Sunday off in a month would be interrupted.

"No, it's nothing like that," Marshall offered.

"Is Mary okay? Any complications?"

Marshall didn't answer immediately. It wasn't that he was at a loss for words, but more that he couldn't tell Stan much of anything without compromising his position as Chief Inspector.

"Marshall?" called a concerned Stan, "Is Mary okay?"

"She will be, Stan," he answered, even though he was not entirely convinced it was true. "There's just something that she has to take of and it means going out of town for a few days."

"Where? And how is she getting…you're with her, aren't you?"

"Yeah."

"How long?"

"Tuesday night, Wednesday the latest," Marshall replied, hoping it wouldn't take them any longer.

"And this is really necessary?" The growing irritation is Stan's voice began to rub off on Marshall, whose nerves were already worn thin.

"This can't wait, Stan, and you know there's no way in hell I'm letting her take off on her own in her condition. She's still recovering from…" Marshall hesitated, still not able to verbalize the shooting and cursed himself, knowing Stan wouldn't let it go. He ran a hand through his hair and continued. "After what happened, I'm not going to let her go off and risk her health when she can't seem to bother to even try and take care of herself.'

Stan was well aware of the bond between his two Inspectors and as long as they were getting the job done, he chose not to think about what the future may bring. He had witnessed how difficult Mary's shooting nad been Marshall, but sensed from the strain in the voice on the other phone that there was something else going on. Trusting them to work it out and knowing neither of them would listen to him anyway, he decided to let it go, for now. There would, however, be some serious discussions upon the younger Inspector's return.

"So help me God, Inspector, if there are any emergencies with any of your witnesses…"

"Thanks, Chief." Marshall was genuinely grateful to Stan and felt guilty for having snapped at him.

"And Marshall, I'm serious about the psychologist. If I find out you're not going…just don't make me order an official psych evaluation."

The connection went dead and Marshall put his phone away as he climbed into the SUV and moved it to a parking space before joining Mary inside.

"Everything okay?" Mary asked as he sat down, looking at him expectantly.

He answered with a look that said, are you crazy? Nothing was okay. Not them, not this situation and he couldn't believe that she had actually asked that question.

She pursed her lips, knowing he was right, and picked up her menu without another word.

"I talked to Stan," Marshall finally said after the waitress had taken their order and refilled their coffees.

"Bad?"

"I got it covered," he shrugged.

***

They had been back on the road for an hour and the meaningless conversation and light banter that they had fallen into over lunch had quickly subsided.

Mary knew her partner well and had seen the struggle going on underneath the façade of useless facts and annoying anecdotes he spouted while they ate. It worried her and the sickening feeling she'd had when she read his offer letter from Peterson was forming in the pit of her stomach. She was momentarily beset by doubt. What if she had finally pushed him too hard this time and he was trying to find a way out?

'No, he promised,' she thought, refusing to accept that possibility. Not wanting to jump to conclusions as she had the first time, she focused on their partnership. Disjointed thoughts drifting across her mind as she began to doze off.

"I'll try not to die, for you."

"Tell me what you need."

"That's my girl."

"What about what you want?"

"I hope you know that I love you."

She woke with a start as the memories came flooding back to her and it was all suddenly so clear. It would be easy to claim that she'd been oblivious to what had been happening, but she knew that wasn't the truth. The truth was that she had ignored it and hid from it in hopes that it would just go away. That he would get bored and move on, proving her right; it wasn't real and never lasted. They all left.

She glanced over at her partner, her best friend and the man that hadn't left. He must have felt her eyes on him because he turned to meet them just as she was overwhelmed. Worried about losing control, she turned away before he could see the tears that were threatening to spill over. She could run into battle with guns blazing, but when it came to her personal life she wasn't nearly as brave and it took her time to muster her courage. What she did know was that she needed to start somewhere and that meant telling Marshall about the letters from her father.

"Marshall," she said so softly that he almost didn't hear her over the hum of the engine.

"Tell me what you need," he responded, knowing something was up by the tone of her voice. During lunch they had behaved almost as if nothing was wrong, pushing everything aside for a brief respite, and it had been nice. Once back in the truck, however, Mary had become pensive and when she looked at him a minute ago, he could have sworn she was on the verge of tears.

"What I need?" she huffed. Then growing serious, she continued, "Someday soon, we are going to talk about that. But for now, there's something I need to tell you and I don't think you're going to like it."

Any relief that Marshall felt at the idea of Mary finally opening up to him was crushed by the last part of her statement. He remembered the day he found out about her engagement and couldn't imagine her telling him anything that would make him feel worse than he had on that day. But then again, this was Mary and he knew anything was possible.

"Do you remember when we were working to get the charges against Brandi dropped and I got upset at Eleanor because I didn't want to believe that Lauren could be my sister?"

He nodded. It was not a day he would ever forget. While he had no desire to relive the events surrounding Brandi's arrest, it was one of the rare times that Mary had dropped her guard and opened up to him, even allowing him to hold and comfort her.

"Well, I wasn't totally honest with you when you asked me about my father," she said rapidly, looking straight ahead and not at Marshall. She could see his hands, though, out of the corner of her eye and saw them shift on the steering wheel, only to grip it tighter.

"Since we still have a few more hours before we get there, why don't you explain to me exactly what it was that you weren't honest about." It was taking every ounce of energy he had to remain calm. He wasn't sure what had changed that made her willing to come clean, but he knew getting angry now would just make her close up again.

"You were right about the possibility of being able to find my dad influencing my decision to join the Marshal Service, subconsciously anyway. It's not why I joined, but I've definitely thought about it on more than one occasion. I just never actually got up the nerve to try." She felt as if some of the weight she'd always carried around was starting to fall away and turned to face him before continuing. "I've always been afraid of what I might find. I still am. I just know that it's time to let the little girl grow up and stop pretending that he's going to show up one day and fix everything."

"Good for you, Mare. I know it can't be easy and I'm proud of you." Marshall stated, looking at her reassuringly before returning his eyes to the road.

"Well, you might not be by the time I've finished saying what I have to say." While not too serious in tone, her lack of sarcasm gave credibility to her words.

"I'm not going anywhere," he told her, "so maybe you should just say whatever it is you're trying to say."

"It's true that I never contacted my father or had any idea where he was, but," she paused and took a deep breath, then spit out the words before she could change her mind, "he's sent me letters over the years. The last one arrived the day I moved into the house."

"You've gotten letters…from your father," Marshall repeated slowly to make sure that he had heard her accurately.

"I know I should have told you, Marshall. It's just the letters have been arriving randomly since I was seven years old, most of them before I ever became a Marshal. In fact, the one that arrived when I bought the house was the only one I've gotten during our partnership." She paused and searched for something to say to make him understand. "I mean, we hadn't even been partners all that long."

"Don't," he said, holding up a hand for her to stop. "Don't make excuses. We'd been partners for a year and a half and I already considered you a friend at that point, but maybe you didn't feel the same way."

"Of course we were friends," she interrupted.

"Then do me a favor and save the excuses," Marshall said. He was hurt, not only by the fact that she kept something so important from him, but also because she tried to make light of their friendship. By that point in time, there was no way she should have doubted his loyalty. "Tell me the real reason behind keeping it from me or don't say anything at all."

"What was I supposed to do, Marshall? Go up to my partner, a United States Marshal, and say by the way, my fugitive father has been keeping tabs on me my entire life and even sent me letters. You want to read them?" She wiped the tears away angrily, "Jesus Christ. How the hell was I supposed to do that? Put you in that position?"

If there was one thing Marshall did well when it came to Mary, it was reading between the lines and it only took him a few seconds to realize what she wasn't saying. She was in pain and he understood why.

"It wasn't really about your father or me, was it?" he spoke in a tone that was almost soothing and she turned to look at him, eyes wet and questioning. "The only one you were protecting was youself."

"What the hell are you talking about?" she snapped defensively.

"You were so upset about Lauren and the fact that your father hadn't told you," he continued calmly, not letting her attitude phase him. "Honestly, I should have known there was more to it, I was just…"

"Just what?"

"Nothing, it's not about me. It's about the fact that your father was writing to you all these years, probably giving you his opinion on your life; telling you how much he loved you, how important you were," Marshall's anger began to rise at the thought of Mary's father putting her in such a position. Filling her head with the idea that she was his entire world when that obviously wasn't the case. "He abandoned you, Mary. Left you to take care of your mother and sister when you should have been playing and just being a little girl. It wasn't fair to you and it was wrong of him to try and ease his conscious by feeding your fantasies about how much he cared."

"He did...does care," she choked.

"I know you want to believe that and if I could make it be true for you, I would. But the truth is, he left you behind and got himself a new family. No matter how many letters he wrote or the amount of times he said he loved you, nothing can change the fact that he moved on without you while giving you hope for a future that was never going to happen. It was selfish and wrong and no man should ever do that to his child."

Marshall didn't notice the effect his words were having on Mary until it was too late. When he cast a glance in her direction, he was surprised to see her sobbing. Reaching over, he gently rubbed the back of her shoulder in attempt to comfort her. He wanted more than anything to take her in his arms and tell her everything would be okay, but he couldn't.

He understood his words had hurt her, but she needed to hear them. He couldn't let her go on believing that her dad was some lost hero, some victim of circumstance, when he was just a selfish man who had abandoned his family. It would take time, but he was sure that given the time to work through it, Mary would eventually see that. The only thing he could do in the meantime was watch her back and be there to catch her when she fell. And she would fall; there was no doubt in his mind. Until then, he'd wait and be ready to help her put the pieces back together when the time came.

Only a few days left to the premiere, I hope I can get this wrapped up in time. Now it's time for you to push that button again.