Trying but failure

Tatyana POV

Ok so the next few days was good and bad. The good part is that my singing career is going great. But the bad part is, that group called Big Time Rush wont stop watching me. Sometimes I feel like they are always looking at me. I made new friends that help me ignore them. Apparently one of my friends named Jo had the same thing happen to her when she first moved here. Except they were even more crazy. Camille suggests the boys knew what they did scared Jo so they didn't do it to me.

Thank god!

Another good part is, is that my sister, mom, and dad are moving back to New Mexico so I don't have to deal with them again. The bad part of that is that, I have to live with my abusive brothers. I do not want to be that little girl I saw on the TV that died cause her brother beat her to death. Sure they beat me and al but mom wont allow them to kill me. But I wish they could kill me. I don't want to comit Suicide. I'm afraid those dufoses might attend my funeral.

Shudders.

I hate it when they watch me! It is annoying….a little awkward……but other than that I kind of like the smarty looking one. He sounds smart. And gets the others out of trances of looking at me. Wait……what am I saying? Smarty isn't the one that is wiping the other weird freaks out of trances……it was the totally ridiculous Latino, Carlos. I guess I like him for that but…..i still don't know much about him and don't want to talk to them. They scare me too much and I…..god I keep repeating everything…..oh well.

Reasons I am scared of the boys:

They are freaking

they are disgusting

they are abusive to each other

Right now I'm more scared of the abusive part. If I was one of the boy's girlfriend, I'd be far to afraid of them abusing me because of what my brothers do.

But I shouldn't judge people. Its rude and mean.

Ok back to reality:

I walked down the halls of Rocque Records to the recording studio to record my song 'about you now', when I saw them. I kept my face straight as I walked by them not daring to glimpse at Carlos.

The other three was looking at me when I walked by except Carlos who was staring at his friends in wonder. I heard one of them speak.

"Hey." I heard on of them say that.

I hesitated but stopped walking and turned around.

"What?" I said in a annoying voice.

"We never really got to meet face to face. We-" I cut him off.

"Just shut it and leave me alone dogs!" I said instantly and turned around walking fast away from the boys that were wondering what that was about.

"Dogs? I thought only Gustavo called us that?" I heard one of them say behind me.

"She is probably the one he calls an angel." I heard either the blonde or the tall brown hair teen say.

I don't dare to stop walking but just continue until I feel someone's hand on my shoulder.

I stop walking and glare at him with wild eyes. It was the tall brown haired one.

I grabbed hold of his shoulder and flipped him over me making him fall to the ground.

I glare at the shocked teen and continue walking to the recording studio a few feet away. I opened the door and walked in the see Gustavo talking to Kelly.

"There you are. Your 4 minutes late." Gustavo arched an eyebrow at me.

"The dogs. You gotta find a pound to take them in. Or at least give them to Griffin Shelter." I said casually. Kelly looked confused and whispered something to Gustavo.

"Yep and that's what I like about her." Gustavo smiled at me and walked to the glass doors with Kelly behind him.

I sat on the seat in front of a microphone and put on the headphones.

***

I thanked Gustavo once more before leaving out of the recording studio into the hall watching carefully to see if the boys are around. I casually walked like I didn't care about anything.

That song my older sister use to sing to me before I left for New Mexico stuck in my mind. But the language isn't English nor Spanish. And she doesn't live with me either. She lives out in the open lands of New Mexico with other kids that ran away and they only speak their language the leader named Agja made up (real name of the teen is Ken). The language they speak is called Tâ'khühìt. (teh- khoo-heet).

I found myself singing out loud:

"Pa Jüt Cüstl pe kalun ta'ni, Rejmot, lemj patíte. Slej pe dêcãdá tíjá'mon kejnom kêté ot'al slue (in my heart I feel lost, lonely, and weak. But I love everything around me like you)' I sang walking down the halls. I didn't realize Carlos heard me. I heard him wow and turn around to see him sitting on the chair on the side of the hall.

I covered my mouth looking embarrassed. "Its ok. I didn't mean to frighten you." Carlos said getting up from his seat.

I uncover my mouth and look at him. "I'm sorry for what I did to your friend. I just get agitated so much and so easily." I said looking down.

"It's ok. James can be fuss sometimes." Carlos shrugged. "I'm not just saying that. Your friends wont stop gazing at me. It is kind of stockish." I shuddered.

"Yah. They do it to every pretty girl they see. I don't. I just take a second and then look away." Carlos shrugged walking up to me. I take a step back.

"I can see that. You and your…..smart looking friend do that. You guys snap the other two freaks out of their…my guess 'trance'……wait….did you call me pretty?" I asked confused.

"Yah. Your beautiful." Carlos answered with a shy smile. I blush a little and look away. "No one ever called me that. In New Mexico you kind of fend for yourself and don't care about other people. Only one part does but the boys never called me that ever." I said looking back at Carlos.

"What part?" Carlos asked.

"Its far in the open lands were a village lives. Not an ordinary village thou. Its ruled by kids. No adults." I smiled remembering the beautiful city of Takoata.

"No adult? Ruled by kids? Not an ordinary village?" Carlos tilted his head in confusion.

"If we go to New Mexico I'll show you. The song you heard me sing was what my older sister that lives among the Takoata people as the queen, use to sing me that when I was younger. I last saw her 5 years ago." I said looking at him. It was true he looked interested in what I have to say. I snapped out my love gaze.

"Gustavo wants to see you guys. I have to go." I said instantly and walk off leaving Carlos sad a little and confused. I walked out of Rocque Records and slapped my forehead.

"Nice going!" I blame myself.

Awww poor Carlos. You would think they were getting into it but she had to block the moment. *Pouts sadly*

Please R&R