A Cullen Christmas Author's note: What do you think so far leave me a review please! Hope you like Emmett's silliness because he only gets more funny! R&R please.
EMPOV
As I walked out of Edward and Bella's house in my funny Santa suit, I turned towards them.
"You know I'm proud to call you two my brother and sister-n-law" I said with such pride.
Then I turned to walk out the door.
"Bye Emmett." They called both from the door, then I disappeared into the darkness of the woods.
I took off torwards Mike and Jesssica's who just lived around the corner from Edward and Bella's house.
I kept running through the woods as fast as I could.
I had reached Mike and Jessica's, they had lights around there house and a Christmas tree in there front window to the living room.
There was a blow up Santa in the front yard with a raindeer attached.
"Blow up!" I Chuckled to myself at that thought.
As I creeped around there vehicles towards there bathroom window.
I was thinking of ways to corrupt there evening.
"Think god they don't have kids yet." I thought to myself not having to worry about being quit when I enter-up there Christmas Eve.
I as walk I thought to myself I maybe I could put on a scary mask, play with there heads by pushing over there tree, maybe make there bed fall apart or simply do what I did to my brother and his wife show up in the Santa suit through there bathroom.
I kept thinking.
"I think I will just show up in the Santa suit." I said to myself.
"That's a brilliant idea." I laughed.
I had reached their bathroom window.
"This is were all my vampire skills come in, so can't let anyone see me." I said seriously.
I pulled the screen out with my fingers then slowly sliding up the window open.
I walked up the side of the house then slowly put in one foot through the window,then the other while my hands grabbed the window to help keep the noise down and in case I fall.
Once both of my feet were through the window.
I put the window screen back into the window,then slowly shutting the window and putting the blinds back in place.
"Ya,I'm in" I said with joy.
"Time to get down and dirty with Mike Newton and Jessica Stanley " I laughed.
"Now that I don't have a big belly i won't look funny." I said sadly to myself.
"I've got to find a way to get to them" I laughed.
I thought up funny ways to make my grand entrance,but nothing.
"Ding Ding" as a light went off in my head.
"I've got it." I heard Mike and Jessica in the living room talking to someone,"Bye Angela bye Ben have a good honeymoon" I heard Jessica say to them walking out the door.
"What!" I thought to myself "Angela and Ben are getting married." I said stunned.
"Never saw that one coming." I heard Angela and Ben's foot steps go down the stairs outside and down the sidewalk,then i heard their car start,and then drove off.
I heard Mike and Jessica in the living room watching tv they were watching the USA network ,when a condom commercial come on.
"Jessica." Mike said beginning to kiss her.
"Uh,yeah Mike." she answered with nothing else to say .
"Hey Jess,you want to carry this up to the bedroom." he said so dirty.
"Ew, thought my brother and Bella made a scar on my frozen brain, this might be worse!" I made a disgusted face.
"Well that was kind of cheesy, but, oh well lets go." Jessica said exited.
"Just as planned" I shouted in my head.
Sitting in my Santa suit I was ready to get my prank on with Mike and Jessica.
I heard Mike pick up Jessica and move her down the hall to there room.
I heard the door come flying open.
Mike laid Jessica down on the bed.
"HELP!" I yelled though my head.
As they began kissing there breathing both sped up and I could hear there hearts began to race with excitement.
"Oh Jessica." Mike let out with groan.
"Yeah Mike." Jessica let out breathless.
Through the crack of the door I saw Jessica's shirt go sailing through the air then landing on the ceiling fan, then here come Mike's shirt sailing through the air landing by the door.
"OK!" I said to myself with such awkwardness.
Then with the sound of the door knob, Jessica's bra was hanging on the door knob.
"Oh hell yeah." I thought "Now that's sexy."I said excited!
Then I saw something come flying through the air again landing the door knob again.
"That must be her underwear." I thought with nothing else to say.
Then both bra and pair of underwear had fell to the ground by the weight shifting off.
The white bra strap laid under the door, I saw her underwear they were blue with white stripes.
I had grabed them to pull them under the door to inspect closer.
I pick up the white bra first. "WOW!" I said speechless.
Then I reached down to pick up the blue striped underwear.
"What the hell." I said softer than a whisper.
I picked them up. "Those are not Jessica's, these are Mike's boxers. OMG, Oh hell no he didn't." I threw then just as fast and far away they would go. They landed across the toilet.
"EW!" Shaking my hands trying to get Mike"s germs off that came from Mike.
"Well sense I grabbed Mike's boxers I'm going to pay him a visit from Santa." I let out an evil laugh.
"One,two,three." I counted in my head for the right number.
"Ten!" I said,I grabbed the bathroom door handle.
"Now!" I Burst open the bathroom door.
My knee's where dancing up to my chest, my arms where flapping like a chicken's wings through the air.
"HO HO HO MERRY CHRISTMAS Santa has came to visit you naughty children!" I let out in my deep Santa voice.
There they both lay naked as could be Mike's bare butt sticking straight up in the air.
*SNAP* "There's my money from Edward and Bella." I laughed to my self.
Then I returned doing my same dance.
Jessica asked scared to Mike. "Um.. Mike who's that?"
They both let out a scream.
"Um Jess I don't know." They both got out of bed , both still naked, they go running down the hallway screaming for dear life.
I took off after them just to be even more mean, still flopping my arms up and down like a chicken and moving my legs up to my chest, I walked towards them.
They got to the end of the hall then turned around to run torward there room, Finally there room and shut the door with a slam, then locked it.
"HO HO HO HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS!" I said trying not to laugh at what caos i had just caused.
Then I turned to run out the door so they would never know who payed them a visit behind the Santa suit.
I opened the door quietly and as fast as I could but I knew it wouldn't have to be to fast because I heard Mike and Jessica in there bedroom continuing there Christmas eve I had corrupted moments ago.
I had decided to go back to Edward and Bella's house to see what they were up to.
So I ran as fast as I could down the stairs, down the sidewalk and dashed into the woods then made a left turn back around the corner, I kept running until I reached there door step.
I slowly opened the door to try not to awake Renesmee. I walk through the living room toward there room then looking at the clock above the fireplace reading 2 am.
"I have to make this fast so I can go home and help with gifts" I thought to myself. "Got to hurry hurry!"
I had reached there bedroom then opened there bedroom door. "Hello Edward and Bella!"I said enthused.
"What a pleasure it is to see you hear Emmett!" Bella said sarcasticlly. "Oh you agian." Edward siad unhappily.
They both lay in bed doing nothing but just watching t.v and Bella in Edwards arms.
"Not what I imagined, but hello you two." I said surprised
"What you two doing?" I said questioning there look on there faces but them both Innocent.
"Nothing much, just watching t.v and waiting for Renesmee to wake up and Christmas to get here." Bella said with no enthusiasm. I look at Edward to see if he was going to speak but nothing.
"Now who is the party pooper tonight you two?" I asked in a questioning voice.
"It's you Emmett, you killed the mood by entering our room, ."Edward said sarcastically.
"Well excuse me."I shot back.
"I guess I will be going home now." I said folding my arms across my chest.
"Wait, Emmett did you get those pictures of Mike and Jessica?" Edward asked laughing.
"Oh about that,boy do I have the funniest story to tell you guys." I said laughing at the flashback.
"Okay? You going to tell us or what?" Bella said impatiently.
"Well I'm going to make you wait." I said.
"What!" Bella screeched.
"I was just kidding." I said jokingly.
"So you going to tell us?" Bella pleated.
"Okay here we go." I said excited.
" I got in the window then heard somebody was visiting, I heard Jessica say bye Angela and Ben have fun on your honeymoon." I said laughing.
"What!" Bella screeched. "Honeymoon, They got married. Wow last people I expected to make a relationship last" Bella said so stunned.
I continued "Then Mike was turned on by a condom commercial." Edward and Bella began to laugh at Mike's cheesiness and then I joined in.
"Then they took it to there bedroom, then their close began to fly, Jessica's shirt hit the cieling fan,Mike's shirt landed by the door, and Jessica's bra landed on the bathroom door handle."I said giggling.
" and you picked up her bra and Mike's boxers thinking it was her underwear." Edward added thanks to his mind reading skills Edward said laughing.
"I'm going to tell Rose." Edward threatened. "That's what you get for doing what you did to Bella and I."Edward said laughing.
"Shhhhh." I told him to let me tell Bella sinse he got the whole replay through my head.
"Ewww Emmett that's gross you pervert." Bella said to me as I laughed.
"Okay I'm going to continue now, Then I walked in flapping my arms like a chicken and moving my legs up and down to my chest in my Santa suit." I laughed.
"When I opened the door I thought I was going to throw up, even though I can't I was was probably going to if I had to stare at Mike's butt any longer." I said covering my mouth and stomach with my hands.
"I opened the door and saw Mike's bare butt sticking straight up in the air, nastiest thing I have ever seen." I emphasized.
"Then they took off down the hallway, butt naked." Bella and Edward was in hysterics laughing at the thought of Mike and Jessica butt naked running from me.
"Well that's it." I said proudly at my accomplishments.
"Oh wait here are those picture's." I handed them the picture I took of Mike's butt in the air!
"OMG, Emmett this is so funny, it's going on my-space tonight." Bella giggled.
"Well I better get home so I can help get things ready for tomorrow." I said turning to walk out the doorway.
"I can take you home Emmett."Edward offered.
"No, No that's OK I have bothered you two enough and besides I can run faster than you can drive Edward." I said turning down the offer. Then turned towards the door.
"Bye." I said then shut the front door then dashed into the woods forwards home!
Preview for chapter 4 Bella and Edward take there revenge on Emmett with everyone's help. R&R please.