I was going home.

The Cullen home.

My mom is gone, for a long time.

It's over.

Finally.

They'll take good care of her where she is.

I'll be taken very good care of where I am.

Esme and Carlisle went to court the day after I woke up and obtained custody of me.

My mother is in rehab, in a state funded center.

I'm free. I know that it sounds bad, but it feels good…

Olivia, Abby, John, and Frank gave their consent in court. They said what they had too, and I choose.

I choose love, because venom is sometimes thicker than blood.

I love the Cullen's, each in their special way.

I love Esme for her sweet and motherly ways.

I love Carlisle for caring for me with the up-most care.

I love Emmett for his light and fun personality.

I love Rosalie for caring for me, and wanting the best fate for me.

I love Bella for her trust in me.

I love Edward for making Bella, Bella.

I love Jasper for being my heart, soul, and total being. I love him for his love, compassion, and pure beauty.

I know that I could never live without him, and if I did, it wouldn't be called living. It would just simply be surviving.

Now I know why in death announcements and obituaries it says survived by. If they loved the deceased one tenth of what I love Jasper, they would never truly live again too.

Now we are able to live together. No one is in our way anymore. No one is stopping us.

The people in our lives now are supporting us fully.

It's wonderful.

Jasper squeezed my hand; a reassuring type of way, breaking my trance.

"Are you sure that you're ok?" he asks. He thinks that I'm still in pain.

I let out a humorless laugh. "You should know." I said.

"True," he answered "I felt a little pain though a few seconds ago."

"It was emotional pain." I mumbled.

I was still hurt. Not so much in the physical. It was mostly pure emotional.

She was my mother.

She was my monster.

I loved her, and then I loathed her.

She gave me life, and the first 11 years of my life she was the perfect mother.

Then she met the monster, and the monster she became.

She was no longer mother.

Jasper pulled to the side of the road, scooted over to my side, and pulled me into his lap.

I didn't realize that I was shaking until he wrapped his arms around me.

My sight was clouded.

My breathing was erratic.

I wasn't sobbing. It was something more powerful; more meaningful; more heartbreaking.

Jasper just held me. Knowing perfectly what I was feeling. He shared my pain with me.

Pain.

It's a funny thing.

It can make people closer, or drive them apart.

It can make or break relationships.

It can last for a fraction of a second, or for years.

It's amazing how a reaction of a nerve can take over your mind and dominate your thoughts.

I personally favor physical pain over mental.

You can treat physical. Just a little medicine and you good to go, almost like it never happened, and then it fades.

Emotional pain festers. Almost like an infected sore. It gets worse, worse, and worse. Then you get sick, and then you die.

That's a pretty little picture, isn't it?

I feel very alone.

"You're not." Jasper whispered into my hair.

"How can you be sure?" I ask.

"Because, look around, you have a best friend anyone would kill for, two girls who want to accept you if you give them the chance, and me." he said gently

His words struck a chord.

More like a heartstring, I found fault in my ways for the first time.

It kinda hurt.

"Don't do that." Jasper commanded.

But I couldn't stop. I knew I was hurting him, and it hurt worse then, I was being selfish, and petty, but I didn't care.

"Stop it ok. Just stop it." Jasper said "You don't know about being "alone", and I hope you never do, it's more painful than what you feel."

He was right. He always is. I need to decide.

Sink or swim in the game of society.

I need to be more open.

"You are right."

Bella, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, and I playing guitar hero. All of us are laughing.

"I need to give people chances to know me. I'm starting now."

Hello!!! I know, long time no see, or write I should say. Sorry, I have been really busy... well, I hope you like this ch. I think that Alice does a lot of growing up.

Review please!

OH! one more thing! I know this is random but, can you tell me your favorite anime movie? Mine is Howl's Moving Castle! Can you send it to me in a review?

Thanks!